Leah's Changes
by Corinne Tate
Summary: Twitastic Award Nominated!  Sam's wedding has freed her to find a love all her own.  She's free to learn what it is to be a shape shifter and find her own place, both in and out of her pack.  All shifters are not LaPush wolves!  New & old characters.
1. Chapter 1 Wolf

**A/N: This was my first story here. I submitted it before I read a single story on here - I was so eager to write and post it. I didn't know my chapters were too long. I didn't know that hundreds of Leah stories were out there already. And I didn't know that so many writers had Leah running away from her problems. And I certainly didn't know what Blackwater stories were, thank goodness. So at first this might seem similar to others, but I think you'll find she didn't run FROM her problems, but TOWARD her future.**

**I felt Leah got a raw deal and this is her happily ever after. It's been nominated for a couple awards, but didn't win. Still, it's worth reading, and as I write this, I'm beginning a corrective rewrite.**

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Leah's Changes

Chapter 1

Wolf

My life was becoming unbearable. Every happy ending left me in pain - layer upon layer of ache and emptiness. It seemed everyone I loved was finding happiness. While all I could do was watch - as if on the outside looking in.

I was happy for the safety of our tribe and our people. I didn't even begrudge the good things happening to the tame vampires of the Cullen family. I just couldn't bear to _watch. _

I thought I'd found a kindred spirit in Jacob. He understood my pain, and I imagined once the Quileute's were safe, we'd be able to run off and explore the world as wolves. But then he imprinted on Renesmee. Not only did he have it bad for the little mutant, but I had to listen to his every thought about how amazing she was: how strong, beautiful, intelligent, and talented was his half human vampire soul mate.

I guess I deserved it, but I was getting tired of everyone telling me verbally and especially mentally how big a pain in the tail I was. Just because I was getting sick of patrolling the vampire's territory, and I still told them they stank. After the dust up with the big, tough, head blood-suckers from Italy everyone was all sunshine and kisses. Jacob was even more devoted to the little half-breed now that he knew he'd only have to wait another six or seven years before she would be mature enough to mate. It was disgusting!

I never asked to be a werewolf. Some even said I deserved it, since I had more anger in me than any two women combined. I was trying hard to get my temper under control, but I was having real difficulty with so much changing around me. Not only were Jacob and the rest of the pack spending more and more time in their human forms, and hanging out with the Cullen's, but Sam and Emily were planning a wedding.

I could stay in La Push and watch the activity with the planning of the biggest celebration our tribe would see for a long time. I could hang out at home alone since Mom was spending more and more time with Chief Swan. Or I could go listen to Jacob mooning over Nessie. Not to mention the the thoughts and worries of the others joining our pack: Quil worrying over his imprinted mate Claire, and Embry wondering who's his daddy and who's his brother Not to mention my own brother Seth, fawning over the vamps like a trained puppy.

I was desperate to get my temper under control, and stop being the only she-wolf in the pack. In a very short time I was going to have to listen to Jacob's loving _and _lustful thoughts about his soul mate. Not to mention the others who were a little bit easier to take, since their chosen mates were at least human. I was trying...but it was so _difficult_!

Every time Rosalie insulted my pack leader it sent waves of anger through me. He took it as a joke and accepted it in stride, but his bloodlines were pure and her naming him 'mongrel' was an insult to everyone in our tribe. But the more subtle insults of the Cullen family were disguised as kindness. Esme kept sending food and hand- me-downs to the pack since we were spending so little time in La Push and our own homes.

The food didn't bother me much, especially seeing how the boys could eat. But the clothes, even washed and barely handled grated on my nerves. I knew that they'd been worn and set aside by _them_; destined for Goodwill or our pack it made no difference to them. The designer labels and expense of them wasn't enough to make up for the fact that they were cast-offs, thrown to the dogs in their minds. I had accepted some things from Bella, but she was my friend before she became a walking corpse. She didn't give me used clothes, she went to her closet and took new things right from their garment bags and gladly handed them over.

"Alice is going to kill me, but you'd look better in this than I will." She'd smile as she pushed the designer clothes at me. Part of me enjoyed the idea that it might cause a bit of discord in their perfect family. And a part of me really did like the clothes.

I was a woman. A fact that so many around me tried to ignore even to the point where I wanted to ignore it too. I wanted to be pretty, wear pretty clothes and be treated like a lady. I wanted to have men find me beautiful and desirable. But everywhere I turned there was criticism, or worse – pity. Pity that I'd lost my dad. Pity that Sam had dropped me for my cousin Emily. And for those who knew the secret, pity for the only woman who could run with the wolves.

I didn't plan it, I'd really tried to take the high road and attend the wedding with my head held high. I had the invitation with the location of the wedding being at the community center. The invitations were just a formality since the whole community was invited. Sam was most likely to take over leading the tribal council one day, so his wedding was the biggest event in many years. Many in the town of Forks were also invited, and I was most shocked that Bella _and_ the rest of the Cullen's were invited. What was the point of the treaty if they were just going to be allowed to wander through our lands whenever it was convenient? But things had definitely changed.

If everything had stayed the way it was supposed to be, I would have been involved in Emily's wedding. I would have been a bridesmaid, and helped her with all the planning and details. But since her fiance had once been _mine _that involvement was taken away from me. So I was to be a guest – a silent witness to one of the many things that had changed since the vampires had settled here.

I couldn't help but wonder what would have happened if they had just gone somewhere else. There would have been no need to have us manifest as wolves to protect the tribe. There would be no imprinting, and the wedding would have been mine and Sam's.

I was still trying to get over him. I only needed to see the way he and Emily looked at each other to know they were the perfect couple. I wanted them both to be happy. She wasn't just my cousin, she had been my friend, and he had not only been my fiance, but also my pack leader. They both deserved happiness. They were good people and I would be there to shut that door on that part of my life. No looking back.

I planned carefully for the wedding. I'd been to Bella and Edward's wedding and I was sure that Sam and Emily's would be just as big an affair as theirs with so many invited. I would wear one of the gowns Bella had given me. It was a deep copper colored satin that fit me very well. I thought the color should blend in well with all the fall colors of their October wedding. I didn't want to stand out, but I wanted to look confident and secure. I would wear the delicate high heeled sandals I'd found. It may be too cold for being so exposed, but I didn't feel the cold much anymore.

I thought I looked good as I prepared for the wedding. The dress had wide shoulder straps and it dipped modestly in the front; but not too showy. The satin shimmered in the light, and it complimented the brown of my skin with it's different tones. Bella was right, this would have looked terrible on her translucent white skin.

One thing about spending so much time as a wolf, was that I was as fit as I could be without building masculine muscles. Much as I hated the wolf diet, it kept away the pounds and I had the svelte figure many women spent hours at the gym to attain. I couldn't do much with my short spiked hair, but I wore a pair of earrings that glittered and sparkled along with a necklace of polished wood beads. I thought I looked pretty and for just a minute I wished my dad could see me – he'd always said I was beautiful.

I arrived on time and saw the parking lot was full of cars and trucks. There must have been hundreds of people, but they weren't going into the community center. Instead they were all walking around behind. Horse drawn wagons were loading people up and heading along the trail leading up to the bluff where we'd held our bonfires. Of course, I never imagined an outdoor wedding, and certainly not one in such a sacred spot.

I didn't want to sit in a wagon, even though the horses were brushed and decorated and the wagons were whitewashed and hung with flowers. I walked, trying hard not to ruin my sandals on the uneven ground. I felt out of place on the way, walking along the mile long trail winding uphill. Everyone was dressed more casually than I was, and I tried to pretend I wasn't bothered, as I smiled and greeted everyone I knew.

When we arrived, the cliff plateau was just as beautiful as it always had been. From there we could survey much of La Push, with the water below and the forests behind. I could see three hawks circling on the air currents in the distance, almost like they'd come to witness the event. I should have known that Sam would have done something like this.

They had build a large canopy structure out of gnarled wooden branches, and there were vines wrapped around them as the decorations, with only a few fall flowers tucked in. Most of it was open to the sky, and the floor was covered with hand woven rugs, and animal furs of all types. The guests were invited under the broad canopy, and encouraged to kneel or sit on the furs. There were chairs provided for the old, and many chose to stand along the outside to have a good vantage point.

One of the younger boys guided me to a spot toward the front. Mom moved over and Seth patted the pelt beside him. I tried to kneel gracefully, but the dress was too snug fitting and the shoes caught on something rough. As I fell into the spot I heard a soft ripping sound .

Funny how every time I changed I had to contend with split seams and ripped clothes, but this one little tear seemed louder than a crack of thunder. I watched several heads turn toward me and I tried to cover up the way the side seam had split to make room for the angle of my legs. Seth snickered and I glared at him as I tucked the dress under me to hide the tear.

"You look lovely dear." Mom put her arm protectively around me. She didn't say that I was overdressed for the occasion, I had Seth for that.

"What's with the dress...didn't you read the invitation? It said _casual attire._ Are you trying to outshine the bride? "

I growled at him, but he didn't know when it was time to quit. In human form he didn't care that I was the pack beta.

"Don't ruin the wedding Leah, just keep that temper under control," he muttered. I thought about how I would make him sorry next time we changed, but then I noticed Jacob as he ushered people to their seats. He was part of the wedding party, as were many of the older members of both packs. His eyes warned me to be calm. I could tell he understood. I remembered he'd been to Bella's reception and tried to kill the groom before he'd been dragged away. I smiled and nodded his way; _no scenes I promise. _I thought his way even though he couldn't hear my thoughts now.

It was getting crowded under the open air canopy, and I knew that it would happen soon. Off to the side there were a couple musicians beginning to play. It was an odd combination of a guitar, and two flutes. The music was quiet and haunting as it drifted over the crowd and down from the cliff. Little by little the crowd quieted to listen and a hush fell on the area.

It was then I saw Sam step out from behind the trees to the right. He took his place to wait for the bride in the way of modern weddings. He wore a plain white button down shirt, open at the neck, where he wore a traditional tribal necklace. He wore white pants and soft white moccasins. He looked beautiful to me. I felt my heart break all over again, as he looked over the gathered crowd and he didn't even see me. I was less than nothing to him.

When they started to play another song, I saw one of the ushers leading a bridesmaid in from a break in the trees to the left. Smiling they came, along a white stone path leading through the structure to the front. Each bridesmaid was dressed in a simple dress in complimentary colors of nature – green, brown, and yellow. The ushers all wore simple white shirts and tan pants. When they were all lined up the wedding march, or a version of it anyway, was played. We all turned and waited.

Emily came out on the arms of her parents. Halfway to the front, they kissed her cheek and she continued on alone. She was exquisitely beautiful. She wore white for modern tradition, but everything else was a nod to tribal custom. Her veil was made of white down feathers not covering her face, but framing it. Her dress was soft white leather and it fell just below her knees. It was trimmed in thick bands of white fur at the hem, the collar, and cuffs. Her belt was beaded with tribal symbols in the natural colors to match her bridesmaid dresses, and her white necklace was intricately carved beads made from shells, bones, and wood. Instead of shoes she wore matching white knee high boots also trimmed in fur. She was radiant, and her eyes were locked onto Sam's, as the flute music accompanied her walk.

I don't remember much of the ceremony. I watched the crowd, the soaring hawks, the trees, and the way the wind blew the clouds over the canopy. It was almost all tribal traditions, complete with her symbolically giving her sleeping mat to her husband's family. I tried not to cry as he pledged his undying love and devotion to her. He'd done that long before the wedding and nothing was going to change. I watched them exchange spirit gift pouches, which would be opened on their honeymoon night. But then I turned to watch the hawks again.

As I watched one of the three separated and chose a new direction. I watched as it angled its wings to a different wind current and flew away from the other two. Little by little it headed northward and I watched it pass overhead and keep going until I couldn't see it anymore. The other two showed no signs of leaving as they spiraled in a never-ending repetitive circle.

I smiled to myself. How simple an answer to all my problems. Almost as if my ancestors were giving me a sign in this holy place. As Sam and Emily were pronounced husband and wife, the crowd stood up to cheer and applaud. They kissed and there was no doubt in my mind that he was lost to me forever. Even if she were to leave or die, he could never be mine.

I stood and kissed my mother and even hugged Seth. I quickly removed my earrings and necklace, and handed them to Mom. The dress was ripped down one seam to my thigh, but I didn't care.

I stepped out of formation and headed to the side of the open air enclosure. Those who saw me likely thought I was too sad to watch anymore, but I wasn't sad. I just wanted out. Those who noticed me, watched me as I hurried away from the group. I'm sure they didn't see my smile as I started to run.

I lost the beautiful sandals and gathering up the dress in a very unladylike way to gain more speed. As soon as I made the trees, I felt the shift happen. I wasn't as fast at shifting as Jacob, so I knew I was out of sight before I became a wolf. I heard the dress shred and felt my hind leg slide momentarily on the satin. I ran without a backward glance.

North.

I wasn't far before I heard Jacob in my head trying to call me back. His concern was touching, since I knew he had to leave the wedding to make his own change in order to send and receive thoughts. I told him I was leaving, and I didn't know for where or how long – just north and now.

"Let me go Jacob, I'm not upset...I'm free!" I'm sure my laughing caught him off guard and I could tell he thought I'd lost my mind, but I didn't care. I was a faster runner than Jacob and for once I used this advantage shamelessly against him. I flew and he couldn't keep up. I knew he wouldn't order me to return; which was another advantage to being part of his pack.

I wanted to run the direction the hawk had flown, but to go north, I had to first go east. After several hours I still wasn't tired but I was in unfamiliar territory. I slowed down to a lope, and it wasn't long before I found a stream to drink from. Again I heard Jacob calling to me to check up on me. I sent him one word: "Woof!"

An hour later I found a road. It was one of those long two lane roads that seem to go on forever. I thought about following it to a town and maybe settling somewhere new, but instead I crossed over and headed into the woods.

As a wolf I didn't have to worry about what to eat or where to sleep, or even where to do my business. I savored the sights and smells around me and headed toward the least human smelling areas, and always moved north. I would learn what it was to _be_ the wolf. Eat, sleep, even _think _like one. In all the hours I'd been gone, I didn't even think about Sam once. Already that was progress.

As dusk fell I knew that the newlywed couple would soon be leaving their party to begin their honeymoon. But I could smell a heard of deer on the wind, and I was already trying to psyche myself out to anticipate the thrill of the meal ahead of me.

It was easier after Jacob had showed me how to identify with the wolf in me. I'd been getting used to it little by little back home, but this time it was almost pleasurable. It was my own hunt and my own kill, and I realized that in a way I was my own alpha. I tore the animal up and devoured it. I could hear coyotes in the distance, and left the remains for them as I moved on.

It always amazed me how acute my senses were as a wolf. I could hear the coyotes miles away and I could smell all the animals that had passed through the area since the last rain. I could tell what the squirrels were eating that fall, but I couldn't tell where I was on a map.

When I finally got tired, I dug through some leaves against a rotting log, and made a nest. I curled up, tail to nose, and fell asleep. I didn't dream, or even have nightmares – bliss.

When I woke it was cold and it took a second to realize where and what I was. It had snowed overnight and I was covered in a couple inches of the white powder that had made it down through the skeletal branches of the trees. I could see my breath in little white puffs, but I wasn't cold. I shook it off and found another stream for drinking.

I took off running and felt even more joy at the speed I could go. I sensed others in the forest – other predators and even other wolves – but they didn't interest me. At one point I even left scat behind, giggling to myself at what the real wolves would think when they smelled yesterdays pop tarts, ham sandwiches and macaroni and cheese in a pile that must have come from the biggest wolf ever to pass through their territory.

I had a goal of heading north, but because of all the waterways, I traveled east and even southeast for quite some time. I crossed the water on an old railroad trestle, and another time I had to swim. I began to appreciate the rugged terrain of the area, I'd never before seen any closer than from the window of a car.

Eventually I was able to turn and go northwest. I continued to go north, and angled back toward the west coast. I could tell my directions from the position of the sun, but I couldn't tell when I crossed over into Canada.

It's when I lost track of time that it hit me. I was a wolf. I didn't know how many days I'd been gone, but I knew that I hadn't changed back in quite some time. It was the longest time I'd spent as a wolf and I was enjoying it. I heard Jacob every night calling my name and I responded with a sound of well-being that only a wolf would understand. He didn't intrude beyond that and I found that I could shut everyone else in the pack out with the distance. I realized he must have been using his alpha ability, or he might not have been able to reach me either.

I felt like I might be in Alaska but I wasn't sure where the boundaries were. There was snow on the ground and it snowed regularly, which made hunting fun and challenging. I learned to sneak up on the animals and run them down, overwhelming them with my speed and strength. Even the moose were no match for me, though I hesitated to bring them down since it was more meat than I could finish on my own.

One night I was hunting and I smelled something interesting on the air. It was another wolf pack and I trailed after them observing. They were strong and I watched them from cover and downwind as the three males and two females hunted. They worked well together as they brought down a large antelope. I watched them feeding, first the large alpha and then the other four.

The alpha stiffened and I could tell he must have smelled me. I'd eaten already and I wasn't interested in their kill. I almost moved on but something about his stance caught my attention. He was huge by normal wolf standards, with thick silver-gray fur and powerful muscles. I left the undergrowth where I was hiding and approached slowly. I instinctively knew how not to challenge his authority or present as a threat. Fearlessly he came toward me and I held still watching him peripherally. As soon as he saw I wasn't a threat he did the one thing that I'd always seen dogs do that drove me crazy; he sniffed my behind!

Leah was so far gone that I responded as a wolf. I sniffed back. It clicked as I understood almost all there was to know about him. He was four years old, the biggest and oldest of his litter, he'd just eaten, and his previous meal was twelve hours earlier; rabbit if I wasn't mistaken. He was indeed the alpha, and he was _healthy. _I knew he was getting the same kind of information from sniffing me, and I think I must have confused him since he sniffed twice more. I wasn't sure what message he was getting, but he came up to lick my muzzle and brush his strong wolf body against me. If I'd been a woman, that would have been a kiss. The wolf was making a pass at me!

I nipped at him and ran. He was strong and he chased me through the clearing. I circled around and he was catching up with me. He was smaller, but entirely wild and I felt him nipping at my legs. It was playful and flirtatious and fun! When he charged into me he knocked me off my feet and we rolled on the ground wrestling like Seth and I used to do.

It was then a strange odor hit me – arousal. The wolf wanted me! He wasn't wrestling with me he was trying to mount me and I was almost too late to stop it! I snarled and snapped at him but he wasn't ready to give up at my obvious 'No!' I was almost panicked as I tucked my tail protectively and bit his exposed shoulder. He yelped and I was able to get free. He came at me again more serious, then I remembered I wasn't an ordinary wolf. He charged me and I grabbed him in my strong jaws and threw him high over my back, watching him twist in midair before he crashed into a tree and hit the ground. He got up stunned but unhurt and I bolted before he could decide if I was worth chasing or not.

Two hours later I raised my muzzle to the sky and howled. I listened, and there were no answers. I searched the night for the right place and found a small cave. It was there that I changed back to Leah. I could run as a wolf, eat as a wolf, even relieve myself as a wolf, but there was no way in the world I was going to _mate _as a wolf! I was surprised to find it was my time of the month, which might have translated into being in heat for a wolf. My cycles were all out of whack since being a wolf tended to push back the human cycles. So roughly thirty _human _days made up a cycle. As a wolf I wasn't sure what to expect. All I knew was that no matter how cold it was, I would stay human until it passed; no more chances to have puppies...or cubs as it may be.

Reconnecting with my human self was strange. I was naked and exposed, but I'd grown accustomed to it and I found that I was still pretty good with survival skills. The cold didn't bother me much more as a human than it did as a wolf even without the fur. I was surprised that my hair had grown so much, and it was to my shoulders. I knew I hadn't been gone long enough for that to happen, so it must grow faster as a wolf.

I had found a good spot to camp for the next few days, and I gathered wood for a fire and kept it going to keep away the predators. I could always shift, but I wanted to avoid it until I knew there was no chance of attracting the wrong or maybe the right kind of company. No matter how appalling it was to think about mating with a real wolf, there was a small instinctive part of me that had welcomed it. If I lost Leah entirely, could that part take over? I didn't want to find out, so I built a fire and cooked the rabbit I was able to snare.

I hadn't paid attention as a wolf, but as Leah I noticed that the trees were almost all evergreens. I wondered where I was with snow on the ground all the time and the streams at least partially frozen. I thought I must be in or near Alaska since I'd been going northwest following the scent of the Pacific. The wildlife had changed too. I'd hunted elk and seen caribou and moose. I could smell bears occasionally and there seemed to be more of them. Not to mention the wolves. I'd also caught the distant scents of the ocean. There were fewer human scents and I remembered that Alaska had an abundance of national parks and animal refuges. I thought about walking until I found a road to see where I was, but I wasn't that concerned.

Four days as Leah and I was already bored. I changed back and almost immediately I heard Jacob checking up on me. The worry and concern were back and I answered immediately, 'woof!' He let the contact go before I had a chance to share how close I'd come to mating. Thank goodness he understood the need for privacy.

The day I left the cave was my first encounter with grizzly bears. I crept up to them as they fished a deep stream and they didn't even know I was there. It was very close to their time of hibernation and they were feeding to fatten themselves for the winter. As a normal wolf even one my size they would likely be able to tear me apart, but since we were special I knew the bears had more to fear from me. Still it was amazing to watch them, and their power and size were incredible. In fact everywhere I looked it seemed there were new wonders. Eagles flying overhead, otters, wild fox, and hundreds of birds. I had the best vantage point for sight seeing you could ask for.

I was hunting one day and I found a trail that seemed different and yet all too familiar. It reeked of an unnatural presence. Vampire. I snarled and followed, stalking my enemy with more purpose than any herd I'd found so far. I knew I was close when I saw the herd . A dozen caribou were slaughtered in a clearing, but the ones responsible were no longer there. Twelve large animals, completely drained of blood, were already being scavenged by more natural predators who couldn't discern the stench.

I continued to track them, following them over miles of rugged terrain, hour after hour with no visible sign of them but a scent trail that I couldn't lose.

When I finally found them they were home. Two large homes which could loosely be called log cabins if not for their size and all the glass used in their construction. They were nestled on a beautiful lakefront property. It was dark and I crept as close as I could, without exposing myself. With all the lights on inside, I could watch their movements, or more correctly their lack of movement. Standing perfectly still watching the flashing colors of a flat screen TV, or sitting like a statue reading a book , only moving to turn a page.

I must have watched them for hours before I realized what I was seeing. It was the Denali coven. I should have been tipped off by the animal diet, but in my wolf form all that registered was the scent. I counted them and realized I had met them all while on duty with the Cullen family.

I spent the night observing them, then I circled their home site, marked the territory in true wolf fashion, and left. I could have dropped in to see them, but the presents I left felt more natural – more _me._ Besides, the place smelled like something dead, even if it wasn't as bad as the Cullen's.

I ran all morning to put plenty of distance between me and the Denali coven. No use giving them a reason to chase after me since there was no treaty there.

I didn't know how long or how far I had traveled when I started seeing what must be the settlements of the Alaskan natives. They reminded me of home and I spent many evenings just watching them as they went about their day to day lives. Of course being so close to human civilizations meant I had to be very careful. I could avoid being seen, but the people were fishermen, hunters, and trappers, and I was aware that there would be traps set all through the nearby forests, and even further north on the tundra.

I was starting to feel a little homesick, but I still wasn't ready to go home. I found that it was easier to watch the settlements at dusk when everyone was coming home. There were children of all ages and what I'd guessed to be about 100 families. I'd watch them play, work, socialize and then I'd slink off to run a few hours to hunt. Sleeping was easy now that the ground was snow covered. I could dig down a few feet and bury myself in a cozy little nest.

One morning I was digging out of my snow den when I caught sight of movement. About a hundred yards away was the biggest grizzly bear I'd ever seen. I froze where I was, snow still clinging to my thick fur. It easily stood eight feet tall and I cautiously sniffed the air to see which way the wind was blowing. I was in luck since I was downwind; if I held still maybe it wouldn't see see me.

The smell in the air was one I didn't recognize, earthy and sweet at the same time, like honey from a hollow tree. I stood silent and still, breathing in the scent. Then I noticed the bear was watching me! I shook the snow off and turned to run the other way. I was surprised when it turned to chase after me. I didn't think there should be any problem since I could easily outrun the bears I'd encountered before. But this one was immense and it seemed to have determined that I needed chasing!

As soon as I caught a whiff of the scent, stronger behind me I ran in earnest. I sprinted with all I had and the bear was still behind me. I must have put in two or three miles before I realized it was still pacing me. I wheeled on it and stood my ground. I bared my teeth and snarled and I could feel my fur standing on end. I was warning it that I was a dangerous threat and if it didn't back away I'd attack.

I was surprised how close it was. It had closed the distance to about twenty yards and it stood watching me, coming no closer. I continued to growl, snarl and even bark at it, slowly advancing with as much menace as I could project. I tapped into the rage I felt at all the bad things that I'd had to deal with, from losing Sam to my cousin, to not feeling at home anywhere. I felt myself become as fierce as I had ever been, as I faced the threat in front of me.

It watched me, making no moves as I advanced, stiff-legged and angry. I looked for the right opening, then charged in and bit it hard at the base of it's neck. I tasted blood and fur, then jumped back to guard. I wasn't trying to injure it, just drive it away from me.

The bear roared at me, and it rose up on it's hind legs and towered over me! I'd never felt threatened by anything while I was in my wolf form; not even the vampires made me afraid, but I felt the first touch of fear as I looked up at the monstrous size of the bear. It roared again before it dropped back onto all fours, and I felt my tail tuck and I backed slowly away, still snarling and growling, but knowing if I had to fight it I could lose.

It let me back away, and when I was far enough away I turned and ran for my life. I knew I'd never run as fast as I did that day, as panic took me and I put several hours between me and the bear which didn't seem to be pursuing me. When I was finally confident enough to slow down, it was gone. I still kept moving most of the day, trying to put as much distance between me and whatever territory bred bears that big.

When I finally stopped, I was back in the trees which suited me fine. I only had time to hunt a small rabbit before I felt I needed to dig a den to sleep. I woke the next morning and felt like I'd been running all night. I remembered nightmares of being chased and knew from the look of my den I'd thrashed all night long.

When I dug out of the den I noticed immediately there was a huge bald eagle in a tree just a few yards away. It was surprising since it wasn't in a sky-high nest area, but on the lowest branch, like it was watching me. I shook the snow off and woofed at the bird to see if I could startle it. It spread it's wings wide and then settled down again, preening its feathers. I was bigger than the bird so I knew it didn't think of me as food, but I still felt that it was watching me. I headed off into the woods and tried to ignore the bird. It took to the sky, and every now and then I'd see it circling overhead.

In my flight to get away from the bear, I'd lost the village. I might be able to find it again, but I thought it would be better to just keep moving. The grizzly was too close a call, and without a pack I was vulnerable to anything that was so much bigger than I was.

I realized that I was further from the ocean than I wanted to be. I could still catch a scent of it on the air, but I was disturbed because I could also smell the faintest scent of earthy sweetness the bear wore. When I hunted that evening I was more wary than ever, tracking caribou and making sure I was alone on the trail. When I made the kill, I was ravenous and I devoured the animal with the kind of enthusiasm that Leah would have been shocked to imagine just a few months before.

I spent a few minutes licking my fur, trying to clean the blood off. I rubbed my muzzle in the snow, trying to get clean. Even after all this time, I still hated being messy. It was then I saw the fox.

It was silver and I watched it warily as it came into the clearing where I'd taken down the caribou. I couldn't smell it since it was downwind of me, but it watched me with my kill. It was pretty big for a fox, but it was smaller than me, so I didn't worry too much. As I watched, it stopped and sat on the ground, planting it's two black legs in front and curling it's fluffy silver tail around it's paws. With it's ears pricked forward, it watched me. I thought it was waiting for the leftovers so I turned and backed away. I was about to turn and leave when I caught a scent. It was the bear and I felt my fur raising up, as I tried to find the threat. It was enough to set me running again, and I was miles away before I decided it was safe enough to rest. I was starting to wonder if there was something wrong with my sense of smell, since that earthy sweet smell seemed to be drifting to me even though the bear was long gone.

When I dug my den, I was sure I smelled it again, but there was nothing in the area but a snowy owl, high in a nearby tree. Before I fell asleep I heard Jacob's call, very distant, and I gave the all's well signal, hoping he couldn't sense my unease.

I slept fitfully again, dreaming of something watching or chasing me. When I woke up, I dug out and the scent was so strong it raised my hackles immediately. I was on high alert, looking for the enormous grizzly, but there was nothing but the smell. I looked for tracks, but it had snowed heavily overnight and any tracks were covered up, including my own. But still I couldn't shake the feeling that I wasn't alone. I left the snowy area and realized it was getting harder to walk in the thick powdery snow. I had to leap through the, drifts and I regretted running so far north.

I had just started to move back to the south to get out of the heavier snowfall when I caught sight of him. Not the bear, but another wolf. It was bigger than the one I'd encountered before and I was stunned at his beauty. I stood still and looked at it as it stood in a clearing, looking back at me. It was silver in the sunlight and his stance reminded me a bit of Sam in his wolf form. I stood still as the wolf moved slowly my way. Not only was it bigger than me, but it was bigger than Sam and Jacob! I watched it walk, calm and slow, and I felt no threat from it. I was also surprised that the deep snow wasn't a problem for it.

It came to within a couple feet of me and stood still. It was then that I smelled it, earth and honey. But this time I could smell so much more, and like the previous alpha wolf, I could sense that this wolf was very mature, and the last of it's litter. It was an alpha male without a pack, and it had eaten rabbit and caribou for it's last two meals. And of course it was a very healthy male. I felt all of my senses on alert as we stood almost nose to nose, though his nose was higher than mine. As I watched, his tongue rolled out of his mouth and he gave me what seemed to be a wolf smile. Then he licked me with his long wet tongue, laying his scent wetly across my nose and dashing backward playfully in the snow. And I chased.

It was instinctual to chase that which might get away. But there was something more to this game as I took off after him, barking and nipping until he changed directions suddenly and came after me. I could run fast, but he was bigger and could cover more ground with his longer strides. I discovered if I ran straight he'd quickly catch me, so I changed directions often, and was able to sprint circles around him. I don't know how long we played, but the snow was packed down and we were both panting when he stopped and laid down and continued to watch me. I sat, enjoying the way the cold air cooled my hot lungs. We watched each other and then he stood and walked over to me. He came along and brushed against my side and licked my muzzle. I remembered that to be a wolf kiss and suddenly all my alarm bells went off.

I didn't think it was time for my cycle again, but I wasn't taking any chances. I threw him down physically in the snow and fled into the trees with what was left of my energy. I heard him bark and give chase, but I was able to vary my path like a canine agility test; weaving in and out of trees, leaping from boulders, and tearing through underbrush. When I finally thought I'd lost him I was exhausted. I changed back to Leah and spent an hour walking and trying to find a good place to hide.

The best I could do was a rock outcropping that made a good den when I dug out the snow. I hid inside and spent time shoring up my hiding place, knowing there would be no fire tonight until I knew it was safe again. With nothing but a small hole for air I was able to rest. It wasn't yet night but I was exhausted and fell asleep immediately.


	2. Chapter 2 Shape Shifter

Chapter 2.

Shape Shifter

In the morning it was warm in my hole, but it was also damp and I felt like my body heat had melted the snow. I dug out a bit and looked around at the bright morning. The scent almost knocked me over and I cowered in the den afraid to come out. I waited for the attack but it never came. I carefully looked out of my hole and saw the area was covered with tracks; so many tracks the snow was packed down with them. And the scent was strong even though there wasn't an animal in sight. Then I heard laughter.

Not growling, snarling, purring, wheezing, or any other animal noise, but real human laughter. I had nothing to cover myself with so I ducked back into the hole, all but my eyes and the sound got louder. When I saw him he was crouched down about 20 feet away. It was a man. A very large and mostly naked man watching my hiding place, and laughing at me! He stood up and I saw that he wasn't just large, he was easily the biggest man I'd ever seen! I would have thought the NBA had misplaced one of it's players if he didn't look more like he belonged in an old western movie. He had long black hair, and reddish brown skin. He wore nothing but a loin cloth; an honest to goodness Tarzan and the Apes loin cloth made from some kind of animal skin! I tried not to look since right then I'd have given anything for something like it.

He laughed and smiled as he approached, then squatted down right outside my hole. "Are you ready to stop running and hiding from me my beautiful tikaani woman?" I wanted to pretend I wasn't there, but he already knew. Besides if I played invisible he might just take it upon himself to dig me out, or worse, join me inside.

"I don't know who you are, but you can just go away and leave me alone!" I tried to sound menacing, but it sounded weak and whiny even to my own ears. And then he was laughing again.

"Will you tell me your name so I'll know who has stolen my heart?" He was still crouched and looking for my eyes in the opening of the den. "You can call me Keelut, it's an Inuit name. Please relax, I won't hurt you, I could never hurt you!"

I found myself kneeling in the cold, damp hole trying to look at him without giving too much of myself away. "I'm Leah Clearwater, and I'm not coming out of here so you can just go away!"

Again he laughed, "Leah. So the goddess has a name!" He stood then and I watched him do some kind of strange dance outside my den, all the while chanting my name. As I watched some things started to get through my sluggish brain. One was that he was clearly a native, a different people from my own, but not _that _different. Two was that the temperature had to be hovering in the low teens Fahrenheit and yet he was dressed for the jungle and didn't seem to be cold; even his feet were bare. The third thing was what was just starting to dawn on me; he was incredibly handsome. And strong with a wide muscular chest and biceps that looked like he worked out regularly. And the rest of his body seemed to be proportionate in strength. 'Stop looking!' I tried to tell myself, but still my eyes watched his every move!

He turned again and came back to me, then he laid out flat on the snow and peered into my hole at eye level. He knocked a bit of the snow away from the hole, and I was worried he was going to pull me out, but he stopped. "I just wanted to look at your face Leah." he smiled and I felt that scent hit me again. It was warm and sweet, and natural and I found myself breathing it in as his face came closer to mine. He reached into the opening and took my face in his very large hands. "So beautiful! I didn't think I would ever see another like me!" He leaned in and I thought he was going to kiss me. I felt his incredible heat and tasted the scent coming from him and pulled away from him in a panic. He laughed again and moved away from me. "Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you. We're the same Leah Clearwater, I'll show you." He took several steps back and I watched mesmerized as he changed into the large wolf I'd encountered. He paced in a circle and I watched amazed as he sat outside my hiding place. His large tongue unrolled and he sat watching me. I backed away from the opening and changed myself since I wouldn't be breaking the tribal secret. Wolves never had to worry about being discovered in the nude. I dug myself out of the hole and joined him on the outside.

He picked up the scraps of leather in his mouth and tossed his head to the west, indicating that I should follow him. We ran tirelessly for hours and he seemed to have a place where he was going. I followed him easily keeping up with the pace he set. It was late in the day when we came out of the woods into a clearing. We were in sight of a body of water that had the smell of the ocean. The whole area had a beauty and tranquility I could even admire as a wolf. When we stopped he walked around a tree and a minute later came back in human form wearing the little leather loincloth and a smile. "It's not the best way to travel, but usually I don't run into anyone out here. Come along, I live close by."

He lead me along a short distance from the shore line and I walked behind him following his scent. When we came to an area that looked like humans lived there he smiled and opened his arms wide to indicated the whole area. "Home sweet home." There was a small wooden shed set back against the trees with a canoe and a kayak up against it. There was an area, surrounded with wooden benches and small boulders, that was obviously for a campfire. And there was what looked like a cellar door barely visible under the mound of snow.

He walked over and pushed the snow aside to reveal the angled metal doors that were actually set back into what looked like a mound of some sort. He tugged on the doors and they opened with a huge protest. I could tell that it took incredible strength to lift the doors, and he made it look effortless. I saw there were stairs leading down but I was reluctant to go. "Please Leah, you don't need to be frightened." I wasn't afraid, or at least I wasn't about to let him know that I was. I went through the doors and down the stairs. His scent was strong inside and he followed me, closing the doors behind him with a heavy thud.

"It's got all the comforts of home so long as your tastes aren't too extravagant." He lead the way turning on the lights as we passed through a main room and past a small kitchen . To the back of the structure there was a large bathroom and an even larger bedroom. He opened the closet in the bathroom and pulled down towels and a new toothbrush and then went into his bedroom and opened drawers to pull out clothes. "I noticed you don't like to be dirty, so if you want you can take a shower and change. I'm just dying to talk to you face to face, but I can wait a little longer!" He smiled and closed the door on his way out.

I waited a few minutes to make sure I was truly safe, then changed back to human form. I found his shower and the hot water felt like a miracle after being in the cold for so long. I washed my hair for the first time in what must be months and it had grown halfway down my back! I got out feeling clean and ready to be human again. He'd given me a soft chambray shirt and a pair of boxer shorts to wear. The shirt was huge on me, and the shorts fell right off. I rolled up the sleeves and made sure the shirttail covered me; it came to my knees! I combed out my hair, marveling that it wasn't matted or full of parasites from my months as a wolf. I carried the towel and shorts out with me and heard him in his kitchen.

He had washed up and dressed in a flannel shirt and a pair of well worn jeans, and his feet were still bare. I could smell food cooking; some kind of omelet from what I could tell. He turned as soon as I came out and his eyes lit up at my transformation. His smile was huge and his eyes locked onto mine. He came to me and took the clothes from my hands, tossing them absently into a basket. "Just look at you, you're stunning! He was standing so close, invading my personal space and yet I didn't ask him to move. He brought his hands up and ran his fingers slowly through my damp hair, leaning in to smell it even though it was his own shampoo. He brushed my hair back and leaned closer, smelling my neck and bending forward as his nose followed the opening of the shirt.

"That's far enough!" I put my hand on his shoulder to gently push him back. His muscles were rock solid and it was only because he wasn't trying to resist that I was able to move him at all!

"You smell wonderful! And you are so beautiful!" He backed off suddenly, rushing into his kitchen to save the omelet he was making. In minutes he had it divided onto two plates and he carried them into the main room. He poured two glasses of milk and even brought me a cloth napkin and we sat on the couch to eat from his coffee table. "I know it's not much, but I don't get much company." I had already started to eat and I was in heaven just enjoying the simple pleasures of cooked food warmth and cleanliness. I watched him as I ate and he didn't seem to be nearly as interested in his food as he was in me. "I tell you what, why don't you eat and I'll tell you a bit about myself, okay?" I nodded.

"Well, I was born in the village you were watching last week. I grew up there; learned to hunt, fish, and trap and was home schooled by my mother. I had six siblings and I was the last one in the line. I was a dreadful fisherman and almost as bad as a hunter. Dad knew I wasn't cut out to follow him and do what his family had done for generations. So I went to Anchorage and started working. When they came through to put in the pipeline, I was the first in line to apply. The job was hard, but the pay was great and after two years I had money saved up. I enrolled in college, and earned a degree in engineering."

I finished my omelet and was looking at his when he smiled and slid it my way. "You go ahead, I'm too excited to eat." Anyway I liked engineering; building with my hands, designing new structures and all that. But I was in love with the outdoors! I guess even though I'd never become a hunter or fisherman I was still ideally suited to become a forest ranger; so I took the required classes and that's what I did! There are so many parks and preserves in Alaska I had my pick of jobs, especially when they discovered I was native and could regale visitors with legends and history about the area. I was a happy man with satisfying work and a great future ahead of me." He looked at me as I was halfway through his omelet. It was delicious!

"I was working in the Denali preserve when people started to disappear. Mostly visitors who had a tendency to get lost and hurt themselves anyway, but it was happening too often, and not just to newbies, but seasoned veteran hikers were disappearing. I was the one who found the bodies. I guess they weren't supposed to be found since they had been dropped into a deep crevasse, but I knew how to read the signs, follow the animal trails and watch the circling birds. The predators were trying to get to them since the smell was overpowering, but the access was down a narrow opening and I had to use climbing gear just to get myself down into what was obviously a hiding place, a kind of natural garbage can.

There were dozens of bodies in there! All of them decaying and all of them completely drained of blood. They were so empty they were like dried husks that once were people. It's the only reason there weren't more signs of decay. I climbed out and radioed for investigators and it took weeks to identify all the dead. It made the papers that there was a serial killer stalking the parks in Alaska. The killing seemed to stop, and so did the disappearances, at least for a while. The next one was too close to home. I'd gone back to my village for a visit when one of the teenagers went missing. We searched for her but her parents just assumed that she'd headed out to look for greener pastures like most of the kids do these days. I found her two days later. She'd been drained and then set on fire. If the melting snow hadn't put out the flames we wouldn't have been able to identify her.

I went home that night and experienced my first change. The first time I became the only animal I really knew; a husky. I was the biggest sled dog anyone had ever seen and I had no idea what was happening. It was in those first few weeks when I was learning how to control what was happening that I got my new name. Some of the old villagers suspected that I had something to do with the animal that had been seen stalking around the perimeter of the village. They started calling me Keelut which roughly translates to evil earth spirit with the appearance of a dog! That there could be a name for what I was astounded me. At first I denied everything, but then I stopped, and sort of embraced the whole legend. My real name is Kyle...not very native or interesting. Besides it didn't really matter to me that a few villagers believed I was a monster. I still had family there and most people didn't believe the story.

But that changed one night when I stopped a young girl from getting raped by some visiting fishermen. They were sneaky and they'd lured her away from the village so they could have privacy. She was only thirteen and I heard her when she started to scream. They thought they were far enough away that her cries wouldn't carry, but I heard. I found their camp and attacked them; I don't even remember changing. The four men were mauled by a vicious dog that night. One didn't survive....but that little girl did! I didn't live in the village, but I couldn't even visit after that because the people were terrified to be around me. People I'd grown up with and known all my life would avoid me like I was a monster. The legends and superstitions are strong among our people and I was no longer welcome in the village where my parents and some of my siblings still lived. I went back to work and discovered ways to control the change. As long as I held my temper and there weren't any obvious threats to anyone around me, I had no problem not changing.

But one night I discovered another purpose for what I was. I ran across another body drained of blood, and the trail of the one who had been killing in the park. I changed without even thinking and followed it. What I found was a a supernatural monster! It ran from me, leaping into the trees and racing with the speed of something out of a nightmare. And I was able to follow it! When it finally stopped running I found I faced a girl! She couldn't have been older than sixteen and she was beautiful. She almost killed me because my mind refused to believe that she could be the monster that had been killing people. She attacked with speed and ferocity and I fought for my life. Every bite I took was nauseating and I made sure she couldn't get her own teeth into me! When the battle was over she was dead; torn to shreds by my own teeth and claws. When I was able to change back I set fire to what was left; I don't know why but I've since discovered that it's the only way to truly kill them.

Once I found out that the creatures existed I decided I needed to be stronger to fight them. I had a lot of opportunity to study other animals. I spent months hiking through the wilderness watching animals; learning their shapes, their habits, their calls and their cries. When I found a coven of the vampires I changed, but that time I was an eagle; a huge bald eagle with an enormous wingspan, and I flew to the top of the trees and watched them. I was there for weeks, and I learned that they were not murderers. At least not of humans. I think the one I found must have been a wanderer passing through, but I also know there are more of them out there."

I listened to his story and became more interested as he spoke of changing into different animals. Why was I limited to a wolf when he was not?

"I found that after a while I could also shift into the form of a bear. It was an amazing experience! Raw strength and power....and fearlessness! The first time I changed I was a bear for a week before I even thought about changing back. Then I spent time as a wolf which was equally exhilarating. I've been otters, foxes, and even a caribou though that made me nervous since I had no real protection against predators. I haven't been down to the lower forty-eight states much lately, but I hope to take time someday and study the mountain lions. I've also been taking trips further north to study the polar bears and snow leopards."

I was hanging on every word. It registered somewhere in the back of my mind that he had been the grizzly, the eagle, the snowy owl, the fox and the wolf that had followed me. That explained his scent which stayed the same. I still didn't know why he had followed me or even how he recognized what I was. I was still thinking when I realized he'd stopped talking. He sat just looking at me and I started to feel uncomfortable.

"So, what's your story Leah? Did you come looking for someone like you or had you given up like I did?"

We were both on his couch and he was sitting so close I could feel the heat coming from him even though we weren't touching. He was so tall I had to look up at him even while we were sitting; and I'm not short myself at six feet even. I could also still smell his scent. It wasn't sweat or any kind of body odor, but a smell that was more like a pheromone; a part of his presence. I was beginning to like it very much.

"I didn't come looking for anything really; just peace. I needed to get away from the others; there was just too much to deal with!"

"Wait!" he interrupted, "do you mean there are others like you? Like us? How many are there?" He looked so excited and yet I was trying to figure out if it was safe to tell him since it was a tribal secret.

"Yes, there are more sort of like me and sort of like you. But as far as I know I'm the only female of our kind, and I've never seen any others who could choose to be different animals. We'd always considered ourselves to be werewolves, and we are ALL wolves; all seventeen of us. But recently we were told that we were shape shifters and that real werewolves were more in tune with the phases of the moon than their own moods and control. That the real ones are more like monsters than we are."

"Seventeen!" He seemed shocked. "I've lived the last 25 years thinking I was the only one!" He shook his head in wonder and gave a slight laugh. "I still can't believe it." He then looked at me and reached out and softly touched my cheek. "And you're the only female? Just my luck, with sixteen others to choose from you must already be married or spoken for." He looked like that idea was extremely disappointing.

"Well, that's part of the reason I left. There are now two packs, and my pack is full of my close friends and family. The other pack is lead by my ex-fiance; and he just got married this past fall. Since we fall into packs under an alpha male, he gets to decide what we do whenever we change. His word is law. The two alpha's are Jacob and Sam, and Sam married my cousin Emily after imprinting on her. Several members of both packs have now imprinted, and since we share our thoughts when we change it has gotten very difficult for me to listen to all the emotions they're carrying around about their soul mates." I stopped talking since I was confusing even myself so I knew that Kyle might have some trouble following my story.

"You mean to tell me that you can read each others thoughts? That's amazing; what a gift that would be!"

"You would think so, but it also means that you can't keep anything secret or private. Everyone got to know just how much it hurt me when Sam chose Emily. Every horrible thought got broadcast through the pack. And I got to see how he felt about his chosen one every time we changed! It's one thing to lose the one you love, but to know he can still get inside your head or broadcast to you his most intimate thoughts about someone else – it's awful!"

"So, you're the only female, and you're in love with someone else?" He stroked my cheek with a look of tenderness and sadness in his warm brown eyes. "Tell me about imprinting, the only thing that comes to mind has to do with baby birds identifying with the first thing they see as their mother."

I watched him and it seemed his happy demeanor had changed. I didn't know him well enough to be sure but he looked like he was almost depressed. "We were told through our legends that it could happen but it was supposed to be rare. It seems that some of the pack would imprint on the one who would be their perfect mate. We suspect it's to help strengthen our bloodlines, or keep them pure, but we're really not sure what is behind it. It's an instant connection that's totally involuntary, and I've seen it through the eyes of my pack often enough to know what it feels like. It's as if their chosen one is the center of the universe. As if she is the only source of happiness in the world. Nothing else matters but her. She is the reason for living and without her he would die. He will wait as long as it takes for her and he will become whatever she wants him to become. It goes beyond love to a point where its almost a physical connection." I smiled at him. "I'm not sure who came up with the term since it really doesn't fit. I guess soul mate was just too cliche."

"So, the one you love 'imprinted' on your cousin and left you behind? And you had to witness the most intimate thoughts he has about her, and then watch them marry? I can't think of anything more painful! Is that the reason you left?" He touched my cheek again with his big, gentle hand.

I felt the warmth of his hand and saw the concern in his eyes and suddenly I found it difficult to even remember what it was that I loved about Sam. "I didn't leave because I couldn't stand it anymore. I'm sure that's what some of them will think. In fact I'd already gotten over most of the hurt, and I'm in the other pack so I'm not always reminded of his feelings; we can only hear the thoughts of our own pack. I actually left from his wedding. Not because I was upset, but because I could see a way to be free! As long as I stayed I'd always be the ex-girlfriend. The one he dumped. I was ready for a change; and once I witnessed the final bond between them I knew I could say goodbye! The last little thread that held me was cut!" I smiled at him. I wasn't running from something but toward something."

"And here you are!" he smiled joyfully. "I can't tell you how grateful I am that you made it here! Being alone isn't bad most of the time, but sometimes it's the worst feeling in the world. It makes you question your whole reason for existing, like the universe made a mistake." The look on his face told me he'd experienced that kind of loneliness many times. "How did you find me? I mean why did you come north instead of ….going somewhere warmer or even tropical?"

I laughed. "I followed a hawk!" He looked at me confused and I explained. "It's a long story, but I just left myself open for something new to happen and it's as if my ancestors sent me a sign that I needed to go north, and go immediately! It's been a very good decision since warmer weather attracts more people, and I've been keeping clear of people as much as I can. When I saw your village it reminded me of home. It's so peaceful and simple and uncomplicated; I only planned to stop for a little bit, but I found myself drawn there again and again to watch the children playing after school, and the fishermen coming back in off the ocean. And the women gossiping while they go about their daily errands. It's almost like home; except there are no werewolves....or I guess I should get used to thinking of myself as a shape shifter. When I saw the grizzly bear I was as scared as I have ever been in my wolf form."  
"I'm so sorry about that!" He impulsively reached out to touch me again. "I never expected to meet someone like you! I was so overwhelmed I didn't even think about changing back, I just knew that I needed to catch you, or at least follow you. You run so fast! I didn't have time to change or I knew I would lose you. When you turned to fight, I had no intention of attacking, but you came at me like the fiercest animal! You were so brave; to bite a grizzly bear would have been a big mistake for a normal wolf. I wanted to show you that I was bigger and stronger than you but that I didn't attack back. But you ran again." He laughed. "You were so hard to follow I finally changed into an eagle so I could keep an eye on you."

"So you were the bear, the eagle, the owl, the fox and the wolf! How is it you knew what I was but I didn't know what you were?" I was still confused.

He became quiet. I was afraid he wouldn't answer me but then he spoke. "I have started keeping an eye on my village. I worry about the people and they've hit some tough times. I try to make sure wild animals don't cause any problems, or human animals don't get into trouble. Most of the young people leave and don't come back so there's no one to look after everyone else. About five years ago someone opened a bar in the village, so now alcoholism is a problem.. And so I try to keep an eye out whenever I can. That's when I caught your scent. Wolves are bad news when they come in so close to human settlements and I knew that as a bear I'd be just the thing to scare any wolves far away from here." He smiled apologetically.

"When I saw you I was stunned. You were the most beautiful creature I'd ever seen, and easily the biggest wolf. And your scent was....I mean _is _so alluring! I came after you because I just needed to! I had no idea what you were, only that you were leading me on a chase and I was helpless to follow you. Each day I chose an animal that wouldn't threaten you, hoping that you would turn around and head back to the village. When I showed up as a wolf, I had such a great time playing with you! You are a much better wolf than I am and I am awed by your ability to compensate for my greater size and strength. I'll confess that I considered staying in my wolf form for as long you would accept me if it meant that I could be with you. But you surprised me and escaped. I didn't follow you as a wolf since something I did clearly terrified you." He continued to watch me with his clear brown eyes. I started to add up his story and realized he had told about the passing of about fifty years, but he only looked half that age!

"Leah, I had to find you, so as an eagle I was able to locate your tracks, but the wolf tracks turned human. That's how I knew what you were! I stayed nearby and waited for morning. Then I saw your eyes when you first peeked out this morning; beautiful human eyes!" His eyes never left mine, and his smile rarely left his face.

"So you didn't know what I was? You were chasing a _wolf_ halfway across Alaska?" I had trouble believing what he was telling me. It suddenly felt very hot in the room and I wondered if I would be able to open his heavy doors on my own without changing if I needed to get out in a hurry. I was starting to get an idea of what he was about to tell me.

"Um...yea. It sounds so weird when you put it that way! I don't know why, I just _had _to! I was ready to search everywhere for you if I lost you....I just...._needed _to be with you!" He looked like it was starting to dawn on him what I already knew. He'd imprinted on me! Or whatever you wanted to call it. Me! "Do you think that we've got some kind of....bond?" he looked amazed at his discovery, and I felt my stomach turn over. "Leah! Is this what you were talking about? Heaven help me if I don't have more sense than a baby bird!" He stood up suddenly, agitated. He ran his large hands through his long hair as he took several quick steps away from me. I felt the heat coming off of him and suddenly he changed and I was faced with a large silver fox, wearing a flannel shirt and trying to shake out of a pair of jeans! It whined at me, then approached slowly to drop it's head into my lap.

I reached out to pet the soft fur and his eyes looked at me adoringly. "You do make a very lovely fox." I smiled and scratched behind his ears. "So, do you still like me as a fox? I mean maybe if you just avoid all the animals that mate for life you won't feel so....connected to me." He whimpered and licked my face.

"Great. I come all the way to Alaska and find puppy love." He yipped at me, then turned and padded into his bedroom dragging the shirt with him. At least he'd learned not to destroy his clothes during the change; I'd like to learn that one myself.

When he came back out he had on different pants and the same shirt. "I'm sorry about that Leah....are you okay? I was so close to changing into a bear but I was afraid I'd hurt you! It's just a lot to take in!" He sat with me again and I looked him over. Aside from being tall and solidly built he was handsome, with a strong jaw, straight nose, and thick brows over his deep-set dark brown eyes He had a small white scar by his ear and it looked like he didn't have much facial hair. In some ways he reminded me of Jacob; an older more rugged Jacob with a narrower nose and wider eyes. But then again he didn't look anything at all like Jacob....maybe it was just that intense look he had after his imprinting.

"Leah, what's wrong?" I hadn't realized I was so caught up in my own thoughts. He reached out and touched my face again and I nearly jumped. "Please, talk to me....I'm going to need some help with this!" He edged closer to me, resting his hand on my shoulder, touching me softly with his fingers. "Have any of them gotten over this 'imprinting?' I mean certainly there has to be an exception....I mean what if the girl is just not right or is unavailable, what then? Leah, please don't keep looking like you want to run away again!" I heard the panic in his voice as he moved his hand along the back of my neck.

"One of our pack imprinted on a two year old girl. He's waiting for her to grow up, apparently we don't age while we are able to change. My pack leader imprinted on a....an infant girl who is not like us! She's part human and part vampire and he imprinted just as he was about to kill her! She will grow fast, and he's totally devoted to her. He had been in love with her mother before she was born!" I watched him wince at that story. "And then there's my Sam. We were in love, planning our wedding when my cousin came to visit. That fast it was all over! He even ruined her face when he got angry and changed too close to her and he adores her even more!" As I told the story I realized I was over Sam. Completely.

We sat looking at each other. His hand was on my neck and I felt him slowly pulling me closer to him as he leaned in toward me. I knew he was going to kiss me and I wanted to let him. I was shocked to realize the only man I'd ever kissed was Sam. I wondered if it would feel different with Kyle. When he tilted his head and his lips brushed mine I felt the response from his body. His other arm came around me and I was wrapped in his arms as he kissed me deeper. There was his scent, but it was a taste as well, like warm muffins and fall leaves; sweet and naturally earthy. I wanted more! I pressed back against him, kissing him while his hands moved through my hair and down my back. He was delicious! Honey from the woods, sweet watermelon and fresh cut grass, fresh pressed apple cider, marshmallows toasted on a stick! Warm, sweet, natural, and fresh! I could feel my heart thudding in my chest and the blood rushing through me, and the alarm bells trying to warn me that things were spinning out of control. Oh yeah, this was definitely different!

I had to tear my mouth away from his. I gasped for fresh air while he turned to try to kiss me again. "No! Stop, I can't do this!" I wrestled out of his arms as it finally started to register that what he wanted wasn't going to happen. I stood up and smoothed the shirt over me to make sure I was covered and still somewhat decent. "Kyle, I don't think the females imprint! I haven't anyway, and I know my cousin hasn't. And I seriously doubt the little girls have either. I never thought about it before; it's a one way bond at first. I don't know why I never realized that before!" I watched and I suspected he'd already had a long look at my body and he was now watching my face again.

"What I'm trying to say is I like you. I think you're one of the most handsome men I've ever met. I love your scent, and your kisses. It would be so easy to just do what comes natural like animals. But I'm not an animal! And I didn't fall instantly in love with you! I need time Kyle. Time to let my heart and mind catch up with what my body feels." He looked confused, then he smiled and nodded.

"At least you're talking about time and not another chase!" He grinned and stood . He came and stood looking down at me. "I will give you all the time you need....I've already waited twenty-five years for you. Just promise you won't run away from me." He traced his fingers down my arms and laced his fingers with mine.

"I won't promise I won't leave....I take a promise very seriously. But I want to stay in this area ...I want to get to know you better." I smiled at him and he pulled me gently into his arms. I rested my head against his chest listening to his strong heartbeat. I'd never felt like a short person before but he dwarfed me. I put my arms around him and he kissed the top of my head.

"Stay here Leah." When he spoke I could hear his deep voice rumble from his chest. "Stay here with me. Not just in the area, but _here_. I'll make room for you and I won't push you into anything. Now that I've found you I can't stand the thought of losing you! There are so many dangers out there....I would go crazy if something bad happened to you and I never found you again! Stay here Leah....with me." His arms tightened around me and I was reminded how Jacob couldn't stand to be away from Renesmee for any length of time.

I moved to loosen his hold on me and looked up at him. "I have three conditions."

He smiled down on me, "name them I'll do anything you ask!"

"Okay, first I want you to teach me. If I can I want to learn to change into other animals. I want to find out what a shape shifter can really do."

He grinned. "Done. I'll be happy to teach you what I know, but I'm still learning myself. It will take some time....at least it did for me. I'd love to teach you Leah." I was getting a thrill just hearing him say my name. So different from the way my friends, pack, and family said it; with an edge of irritation.

"Next, I'll have to insist on separate sleeping areas. I noticed you only have one bedroom and I won't share that with you...."

"Done." he interrupted. "You can have the bedroom, I can sleep anywhere.....that won't be a problem. I'm not trying to lure you here to seduce you....unless you think that would work?" He grinned mischievously for a second. "Don't worry, I'll respect your boundaries and your privacy."

"Well, lastly I'll need to contact my family. I'll need things if I'm going to be human again. I'll need to let them know where I am and that I'm alright. They can send me the things I left behind like money, drivers license, and other identification. I'll need clothes....not that I don't appreciate your shirt, but it's barely modest."

He was smiling down on me. "You can wear anything I have....you look so tempting in that shirt! But I can take you somewhere to call your family. I don't have a phone since we're so far out even cell phones won't transmit. I can take you to a village to call, or we can just fly over to Anchorage and shop for what you need."

"Fly to Anchorage. You make that sound as easy as catching the bus!" I smiled and loosened his grip on me which had gotten tight again.

"Leah, this is Alaska. Nothing is easy, but most things are possible. We can fly to Anchorage because I fly a plane. It's a little Cessna but it will get you there! It's almost a necessity to fly when you live as far as I do from civilization. I've got my pilot's license, and I belong to a flying club and we share a couple planes. I don't need much here, but if I couldn't fly in supplies I wouldn't have any choice but to change into an animal to survive. Humans are high maintenance creatures." He looked at me like he would gladly take on the challenge where I was concerned. "So it's settled, you're staying here!" I felt his heart beat faster and I'd run out of conditions.

"Yes, I'll stay here, Kyle." He smiled and tipped my chin up and his eyes locked onto mine. When he lowered his head to kiss me I thought I knew what to expect, but still he took my breath away. The way he tasted and smelled was almost overpowering, like eating fresh cherry cobbler by the lake, or french vanilla ice cream in the rain. He was birthday cake in a summer meadow, and sugar cookies by the garden. I was enjoying the silken texture of his hair between my fingers before I even realized I had my arms around his neck! I wondered if this is what Emily felt when Sam kissed her. Sam....I tried to think of him and I couldn't even remember what he looked like! There was only Kyle, and his amazing kisses. 'Think Leah, think!' I had to remind myself that this could easily go too far, then I had to shut up the part of me that responded with an eager 'yes!'

It was even more difficult to tear myself away from his kiss, but he let me go, looking down on me with an amused twist to his lips. "I think you like me more than you want to admit. Are you sure you haven't bonded with me?" I could hear the teasing in his voice but I wasn't ready for him to know how much he affected me. I twisted out of his arms and backed away.

"Tell me, are all men so full of themselves, or is it just you?" I heard the edge of anger and sarcasm in my voice and saw the affect it had on him. I probably could have slapped his face and it wouldn't have hurt as much. I hated to see how easily I could wound him, and I hated to see the old defensive Leah showing her face. I bit my lip and hurried to apologize. "I'm sorry Kyle, you didn't deserve that. I guess I've got a few defensive walls that still need to come down." I laid my hand on his cheek trying to smooth away the hurt look.

His big hand grasped mine and he brought it to his lips, kissing my palm and my wrist. "I won't hurt you Leah I don't know how this works but I know if I hurt you it will only hurt me worse. I want this...no I _need _this to work out, and I'll do whatever it takes to help you trust me. I'm not ever going to set you aside for someone else. I won't break your heart Leah." His eyes were open and honest and I felt one wall come crashing down.

He said all the right things, but it was too soon! I knew nothing about him. I didn't know what his favorite food was, or the names of any of his family members, or even where he went to college. I didn't know if he wanted a family or even how he made a living. "What's your favorite food Kyle?" The question popped out before I could think. He stepped back with his eyebrows raised looking at me like I was crazy.

He looked confused for a minute, then smiled. "Just my luck to fall for a crazy person! I pour out my heart to her and she responds with food questions!" He was teasing me again, but at least the tension between us was broken. "I've never met a food I didn't like. But there's this fish stew my mother makes that's....well, it's not really all that good now that I've seen more of the world and tried new things. But it was my favorite growing up and it reminds me of home."

I smiled back at him. "I wasn't trying to change the subject. I just want to know more about you. I feel like I'm working backward since I can already feel the attraction between us but I don't even know a thing about you. I don't know who you are, but I know you're going to mean a lot to me some day. At least that's how it's working in my own tribe." I was embarrassed, but he pulled me closer to him.

"Well then let me see if I can help you get to know me faster." He was smiling again and he pulled me back toward his bedroom. I was in the doorway before I realized where he was going and I stopped in my tracks. "Don't be afraid Leah, I have something I want to show you in here." I could hear he was teasing me, but he was also serious. "Trust me just this once."

I let him pull me into his room. It was huge, with a gigantic bed carved out of pine logs in the center. As soon as I could drag my eyes away from his bed I saw one of the things he wanted to show me. It was a window running the width of the room at shoulder height facing toward the inlet outside. The view was amazing and I could see the sun setting across the water. "I love how every night I can lie here and watch how the sun seems to get caught in those two tall pines." He pointed out the window down the beach where the land curved toward the water.

"It's beautiful! It feels like I'm right on the beach. Thanks for showing me." He stood behind me with his hands on my shoulders and I turned to smile up at him.

His smile was back. "That's not what I brought you in here to show you, but I'm glad you like it. He moved and opened up what looked like it should be a closet and pulled me inside. I didn't expect another large room, but it was just as spacious as his bedroom, with another window facing the beach. I was starting to get a mental picture of his house more like a sectioned underground den with all windows facing the beach. I didn't remember seeing all this glass from the outside so I was even more amazed to see it on the inside.

He turned me from the view to show me the room. "This is my studio, it's one of the places where I work." I looked at his work and I was stunned. He was an artist and a photographer! Everywhere I turned were paintings and photographs, and the subject was similar in all of them; nature. I saw every animal I could name and some I couldn't as well as beautiful landscapes from the mountains, forests, and seas. I recognized the view outside the window in a few, and I saw some animals that I recognized as the ones he changed into. I wondered if he set the camera up and used a timer to get the perfect shot. He noticed me looking at the photograph of the menacing grizzly standing like it was attacking. "That one's me. I've been in a lot of nature magazines!" He posed like the bear, with arm raised and mouth open and I had to laugh.

"You're beautiful when you laugh. You need to do it more often." He was smiling at me again and I bit my tongue to keep from saying the nasty comment that came to mind.

"I'll see what I can do about that." I smiled slightly. "So what do I look like when I'm not laughing?" He pulled me close and wrapped his arms around me.

"You're beautiful then too." He touched my face as he looked down at me. "I've got something else I want you to see." He smiled and stepped into a corner of the room. I watched him work his way past dozens of canvasses to reach one behind all the others turned toward the wall. " I painted this about twenty years ago. I'd already started into photography, and of course learning all about the animals. I took a class on painting offered by parks and recreation and this just came to me." He held the canvas and I could tell it had been there for quite a while. He didn't even look at it, but instead he was smiling at me. When he finally turned the canvas my way I was stunned. He'd painted me! It was a perfect representation of me except that my hair was still short. In the background was a wolf with the same eyes. Anyone would be able to see that he had captured the spirit of the wolf in the woman....but it wasn't just any woman, it was me!

I was speechless. I wanted to accuse him of painting it a few months ago, thinking that maybe he'd somehow seen me, or worse yet was somehow stalking me. But it was clearly old enough that it was showing signs of wear and needed cleaning. I also knew he couldn't easily lie to me. "I had this hung on my wall for several years; hoping that I would meet someone like her. I felt like I knew her and those sad eyes have haunted me for years. I called her my tikaani woman, that means wolf in Inuit. Then this morning I saw those eyes! Leah, I'm not sure what this means, or how you explain it, but considering all I've seen, I've had to come to terms with the existence of magic or the supernatural. You say you need time, and I understand that. But even if I didn't 'imprint' on you, I've been halfway in love with you for twenty years!" He set the painting on a nearby easel and I couldn't help but stare at it. No doubt it was me, in fact It looked exactly like what I'd seen in the mirror the day I left.

It seemed there was overwhelming evidence that we belonged together. I wasn't sure if I was reassured by it or irritated that the choice was taken away from me. Part of me wanted to deny that this was happening. I couldn't take looking at my face in the painting so I escaped to the other room where the setting sun was making his room as shadowed as my thoughts. He caught me before I could flee further and pulled me close. The last rays of sunlight danced in his brown eyes as he looked down at me. "Leah I'm sorry, I didn't mean to overwhelm you. I know this must be a lot to take in all at once. It's just been a very long wait for me; I'll get over my excitement and stop pushing you. That's really not my intention; I just want you to share my happiness!"

I was about to attack him and let him know how confused and scared I was about everything, and that happiness was the last thing I felt. But then I looked into his eyes and I had to smile. Wasn't this what I was too afraid to dream for so long? I relaxed in his arms and looked up at him. "You poor guy, you've been waiting all these years for your dream girl to show up. I can't help but be afraid that you'll be disappointed. I'm not some fantasy, and I have a mind all my own, and a mouth that gets me into trouble too often."

He grinned down at me. "I'm not disappointed at all! You're more than I ever expected Leah. And besides, I think I can keep your lovely mouth from getting you into trouble...." He lowered his head and kissed me, sending my mind spinning in too many directions at once. I felt safe and loved and the wonderful taste of his kiss. I felt confusion over my own feelings and fear of what my future held.

I was barely conscious of sitting on his gigantic bed, or his hands tracing down my spine and through my hair. The sun disappeared leaving a faint glow on the horizon and his room was almost in total darkness. I felt his body on mine but I didn't remember lying down. Part of me wanted to let it happen; a _big _part of me. But there was still a small part trying to fight it's way up from all of his persuasiveness. A part that wanted to do things right and not make a mistake when I was so close to finding happiness. I pushed him away and struggled to free myself not so much from his arms but from my own willingness to acquiesce.

"Kyle....we need to stop.....please!" Almost as soon as the words were out of my mouth he let me go and sat up. I could hear him breathing hard in the dark and I stood up, very conscious of the inadequacy of the shirt I wore. "I'm sorry Kyle, I'm not trying to lead you on or send you mixed messages. You're very hard to resist, and I've never felt like this before."

I heard him chuckle in the dark. "You tried to warn me that your mouth gets you into trouble....I was just thinking you meant your words!" He stood up and walked over to gaze out the window, then he turned to look my way. "I'm hungry....are you as hungry as I am?"

"Kyle, I need you to understand that I'm not going to sleep with...."

"....food Leah, I'm talking about food! I haven't eaten much the last few days and someone ate my lunch this afternoon. I'm starving and I wanted to know if you were hungry too." I could almost hear him laughing, and I was thankful that he'd broken the serious mood.

"Now that you mention it....I have gotten used to eating after dark. And I'm sorry I ate your lunch." I was heading for the door of his bedroom and he followed me.

"Okay, now we have a choice to make, either I can cook for you whatever I can find in the fridge, or....we can go hunting together! I'd love to hunt with you Leah, or cook with you if you'd prefer." We were in the kitchen and he was prowling through the sparse contents of his fridge. He had a cupboard full of canned food, but not much fresh. I felt confident that I could cook him a good meal with what he had on hand, but I knew that it would only be as good as the can it came from.

"How about we go hunting together tonight, and I'll cook for you tomorrow? I'd really like to get out and run a bit, and it will also give me a chance to check in with the pack back home." I smiled. "I forgot about that connection; I'm always trying so hard to hide my thoughts I forgot I could use it for something positive. I won't need to use a phone if I can get a message through to Jacob. He can send me my things if you can give me an address of where to send them. I'm surprised I didn't think of it sooner! We hardly ever use phones back home, I must have had a lot on my mind to forget that detail!"

He wrote down the address of a P.O. box he used in a village where they still made mail deliveries and warned me it would likely take a week or more to get a delivery. I memorized the address before we left through the big heavy doors. We agreed that we would change in different places and when we got back we'd be able to change and dress before we went back inside.

He held my hand and stroked my cheek in the dark. "Be careful out there!" I ducked behind his shed and changed. I took some extra time so that I could let Jacob know that I was alright and what was going on. I told him I was ready to be human again and I needed him to send clothes, cash, I.D. Etc. He had a lot of questions, and I gave him some basic answers, but I was anxious to run with Kyle. In minutes we were racing through the woods and I was trying to clear his scent out of my thoughts so I could hunt. He was a wolf with me and we had fun playing for a few minutes before we began hunting in earnest. It didn't take us long to find a trail and I almost backed away. I had only brought down one moose since the animals were gigantic and I felt it was wasteful to kill something I couldn't eat. But Kyle wasn't deterred at the thought of so large a meal.

It was exhilarating to hunt with him. We worked well together as I distracted the animal while he moved in for the kill. Afterward I let him eat first as the alpha, but he seemed more inclined to share or wait on me. I backed off, sending a clear message that I would wait. I'd found that the more I stayed in the wolf mindset the easier it made it being a wolf. For most things I had to give up being Leah in order to be the best wolf. When it was my turn to eat it was the wolf mind that allowed me to eat what was left without being picky. When the meal was finished he surprised me by spending several minutes licking the blood from my fur. It wasn't wolf-like, but he remembered how I hated to be messy.

We must have spent at least another hour running and playing on the way back to his home. I didn't notice at first, but Jacob was listening in, observing my thoughts about Kyle. "He's imprinted on you Leah!" I heard him loud and clear across the miles. He was happy for me, but curious. "We want to meet him! I'll check the Quileutte legends about others like us. In the meantime should I tell Sue to start making wedding plans?" I heard the teasing in his thoughts, but there was some seriousness too.

"Don't push it, Jacob! Don't tell anyone yet, I'm not ready to share! Just please send my things for me and let everyone know I'm okay." I felt him agree and then I changed back to Leah and put on Kyle's shirt. I'd lost track of Kyle somewhere between our return and talking to Jacob. I called out and there was no answer. I walked around outside his home barefoot and wearing nothing more than his shirt. There was enough snow on the ground it was a little uncomfortable without shoes, but nothing I couldn't handle. I thought about opening his doors and going inside but I was just a bit worried. I sat on one of the campfire benches and waited.


	3. Chapter 3 Discoveries

Chapter 3.

Discoveries

By the light of the moon I was able to see the inlet. Far out in the water I made out the shapes of the whales breaking the surface of the water. I watched in fascination as the pod frolicked just barely at the limits of my human vision. If I could change into an eagle I would be able to fly out and watch them with some of the best eyes on the planet. I was fascinated with the idea of becoming another animal. After months as a wolf I knew I was better at it than most of the pack except for Jacob.

I smelled him before I saw him. Watching me from the trees was a huge bear, and if I hadn't smelled him first I would have been terrified. Even knowing it was Kyle I was still awed at his size as I watched him lumber toward me carrying something in his mouth. He dropped a strange pack at my feet almost like a dog returning a thrown stick. I reached up to pet his face, and he put his nose against the side of my neck. If he had been a real bear and I was a normal woman he would have easily been able to snap my neck with one bite. Instead he made me laugh, blowing warm air against my ear as his fur tickled my skin.

He then galloped to a cluster of trees where he obviously changed before returning to where I stood. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you ahead of time, but I went to visit my sister in the village. She's the only one of my family who keeps in touch with me. She probably would have left a long time ago except her husband won't leave. He goes out on a fishing boat during the day and spends his evenings drinking at the bar. I'm not sure if she's being faithful to her marriage or her kids, but she's stuck. I help her out with money for the bills and she helps me out when I need it. I had a bad incident with a trap a few years back and she probably saved my foot if not my life. She doesn't understand why I'm not aging the way she is so I try not to visit too often. I went tonight to borrow some clothes for you; you're about the same height, but you're thinner than she is. Still, they should be closer than mine." He picked up the pack and headed toward the doors.

Once inside he set about building a fire in the fireplace while I went through the clothes to find something better to wear. The clothes were a little outdated, but I suspected like most women she kept her outgrown clothes in the back of the closet in hopes of one day getting back into them. They fit well and I was happy she was tall too. When I came out in a pair of well worn jeans and a turtleneck sweater he had a fire going and was making hot chocolate on his stove.

He didn't have a tv and we spent the rest of the evening on the couch talking. He said he usually painted or did a lot of reading while listening to music, but he didn't want a tv even if he could get good reception. I discovered he was into environmental issues, which was why his home was mostly underground; to use less energy on heating. His water was self sufficient; he collected fresh water in a cistern and recycled his waste water.

As we talked he reclined on the couch and I rested against him. I liked how he made me feel small and protected. The fire crackled and he turned the lights off as we got to know each other better, asking and answering questions and telling stories. I tried to stay awake listening to his deep voice, but I found myself drifting off.

I was startled awake as he sat up on the couch. I realized I must have been sleeping when he cradled me up in his arms. He knew I was awake but still he carried me back to his room and laid me on his bed. I was suddenly defensive and I tried to get up, but he gently pushed me back down. "Relax Leah, I'm not taking advantage. You need to sleep and I'm going to take care of the fire and get some rest myself. You take the bed, I'll find someplace to sleep." He pulled a blanket over me and kissed my forehead. "Goodnight Leah, I'll see you in the morning." He brushed his lips gently against mine then walked out of the room.

I laid there looking out the window at the moon in the sky. I could smell him so strongly in the blankets and pillows it seemed odd that he wasn't right beside me. I struggled to fall back asleep, then realized I couldn't get comfortable in the clothes I was wearing. I slipped out of bed and took off the jeans, folded them and laid them on a chair. I climbed back into bed and fell asleep thinking about Kyle.

In the morning I woke up with a smile, vaguely remembering a dream with him in it. I stretched and snuggled into the luxury of the huge bed and warm quilts. The bed was so high up I almost didn't see him. Curled up on the rug beside the bed was the silver fox, with his nose tucked behind his bushy tail and his ears relaxed. I watched him sleep and smiled, thinking how he must have wanted to be close to me without being disrespectful of my personal space. He must have heard a noise as I watched him, since his ears perked up and he poked his head up to look at me.

"Good morning! I didn't know you would look so foxy in the morning!" I giggled as he stood up and stretched. He sprang onto the bed, pouncing on me as he licked my face and I was laughing so hard I could barely push him away. He nosed his way under the blankets and burrowed under, then turned to poke his head out as he stretched out and laid his head on my shoulder. He looked into my eyes adoringly and I kissed his nose. "You are way too cute like this." I wrapped my arms around his furry neck and scratched behind his ears. "You better be careful, I might decide I like you better this way than as a human." He licked my face again and had me giggling uncontrollably. I felt a momentary flash of heat as he changed.

In seconds he was no longer the fox, but a seven foot tall naked man looking down at me. The wet doggie kisses were forgotten as he kissed me with his warm human lips and his hair fell like a curtain against my cheek. His hand stroked my face and I savored the delicious flavor of his kisses; glazed donuts on a nature hike. "You are so beautiful Leah," he breathed against my cheek, "I'm so glad you stayed!" He kissed me again, and even though he wasn't caressing me or trying to entice me, I could feel the tension in the air. If I wanted him and allowed it, we could make love right now! I felt his bare leg brush against mine under the blankets like an open invitation. I looked into his adoring eyes and knew what he wanted. I couldn't blame him for his desire; _he _was in love with me.

But I knew I still needed more time. I'd been in love before and this time I would make sure that it was real for _both _of us! I hated to do it, but I pulled away from him and rolled out of bed. The cold air hit me hard and I realized I was only wearing a shirt and underwear. He smiled mischievously as he watched me scramble to find where I'd laid my jeans. "Don't hurry on my account, this is the best view I've ever seen from my bed!" I swatted at him with the jeans I'd just located and he almost grabbed them from me.

I retreated to the bathroom listening to his laughter as I went. I took a quick shower and dressed. I found him in the kitchen cooking breakfast, and I helped him make biscuits, bacon, and eggs. He smiled as I pitched in to help. "This is a bit more extravagant that I'm used to, but we have a lot of work to do today. You're going to need your energy." We sat in his living room eating a breakfast big enough for six people and I looked out the window at the water watching the birds catching fish

"So, what have you got in mind, are you going to chase me all the way to Canada today?" I grinned.

"Please don't make me have to chase you again Leah!" He looked a little alarmed as he finished his breakfast. "No, what I was hoping to do is take you someplace where we can watch the animals. I'd like to show you what's involved in changing forms, give you some ideas. I thought since the weather is supposed to be nice we'd hike to a small lake I know and maybe have a picnic and watch the other predators."

"Why would we hike when we could just go natural?" I finished off my biscuit and followed it with the orange juice. "I mean it would be faster, and we could make sure to be back long before dark."

"Do you have some reason to rush back here?" He raised his eyebrows suggestively "I mean if you'd rather go out in the woods and practice changing, without the benefit of clothes, then rush back home.....well I certainly don't want to talk you out of it!" He was laughing playfully at my embarrassment. "As a matter of fact, I like your idea a whole lot more than mine!" He slipped his arm around me and kissed the side of my head. "Leah, you are so much fun! I'm so glad you're here!"

He stood and took the plates to the sink. In a few minutes the dishes were washed and I helped him dry them and put them away. He had everything we could possibly need for a day long hike, and I helped him assemble two back packs complete with food and water for a picnic lunch. He packed several changes of clothes and even some books and sketch pads.

When we left he carried a heavier pack than mine, and I tried not to protest; that was the old Leah, ever afraid of being belittled or marginalized. He was of a different generation; one that prided itself on courtesy and gentlemanly manners. I was happy the shoes his sister sent along were a size too big which allowed me to wear extra socks. I still needed to "talk" to Jacob to see when I might expect a package of my own things. Kyle said we would be able to pick it up from a nearby village, or fly to Anchorage to shop for what I might need if it took too long. I was surprised at how fast I was already adjusting to being with him and making plans, even if it was only a week or two away.

He headed off into the woods, setting a brisk pace that had me working to keep up with his long strides. About every twenty minutes he'd stop and consult a compass, see if I wanted water or a break, then take off again. After about two and a half hours we came to a thinning of the trees and he cautioned me to be careful and quiet. "There's a lake just a couple hundred yards away and animals of all kinds come here. It's got some geothermal warming to it which helps it stay thawed even in the winter. It's deep enough and warm enough that it supports a lot of different fish and wildlife. It hasn't made the list of attractions since it's so inaccesable and the water's merely warm and not hot." He handed me a pair of binoculars and I almost turned him down.

"I see pretty well, what do I need these for?"

""I'm glad you asked! What I want us to do is find a spot in the trees to observe. The key to learning to change into another animal is to be completely familiar with it. For me a sled dog was easy since I'd been around them since I was a baby. For you I'm sure your legends make you very familiar with wolves, so the change came natural. You will need to immerse yourself completely in the animal you want to become. You will need to know it's coat, it's markings, it's size, the way it moves, the way it behaves, and it's diet. You will need to almost predict what an animal will do under different circumstances and be able to tell the difference between individuals of the same species. I'm sure you can tell me everything there is to know about yourself as a wolf without needing to see a reflection. You know your markings, your size, your coloring, and your habits; it's second nature. In order to have another choice you will need to feel complete confidence in your ability to assume a new form. I'm not sure why, but I believe this ability manifests to give us the best opportunity for survival, and protection of others. I would have trouble becoming a caribou, unless I needed to lose myself in a herd of them. It's my choice, but some animals just come easier than others." He looked at me with all the seriousness of a teacher to his student. I smiled back.

"I think I understand. That's why we almost always change when there are supernatural threats in our territory. It would also explain why we're always so much bigger than a natural animal, it makes us even tougher than the animals we imitate."

"You're right except for the part about imitating. We don't imitate, we _become _the animal! You still have your mind of course, but we truly become a different animal, so we have it's drives, it's instincts, and it's abilities. When I'm an eagle, I see like an eagle, I know how to float on air currents, I watch prey below me, and I'm always aware of what shares the sky with me. I can even taste the weather. For a time, I _am _an eagle, and I'm only Kyle in the background." He smiled down at me. "Let's go find a spot where we can watch the lake and not get in the way."

We made a little nest in the woods where we could sit or lay and observe. It didn't take long for our scent to dissipate enough for the wildlife to come back. I adjusted the binoculars and settled down to watch. I didn't expect to see much, but soon there was a family of bears splashing in the water, catching fish. I watched the mother bear, learning her movements and everything else Kyle told me to watch for. As the cubs wandered further away I imagined that a mother would want them closer, and was thrilled when she meandered along to gather them to her. I glanced at Kyle and saw he was watching the bears too, silent and unmoving.

I tried to be patient, but he held still for an hour or more until the bears wandered away. Then I watched a golden eagle soaring overhead and trained the binoculars on it. I tried to predict the moment when it would dive for a fish. I missed my guess, but I watched him as he made the catch and the way he barely paused before he beat his wings and took to the sky again. My muscles were beginning to cramp and I wondered how Kyle could remain so still. After what had to be at least two and a half hours of observation, I got up from my spot. He turned his head and gave me a smug smile. "I wasn't about to move until you did, but I was beginning to think you were growing roots." He rolled over onto his back and looked up at me with his head pillowed on his arms.

"You've got to be kidding me! I've been sitting here thinking you'd be upset if I disturbed the peace! I was about to check you for a pulse! The only reason I gave in is because I need to go to the bathroom!" I stood up and stretched while he watched grinning.

"I'll walk with you, I think we need to go some distance away so we don't leave a scent to scare the animals. It's my belief that they don't know what kind of animal we are, but we smell like predators." He stood up nimbly and escorted me through the woods a couple hundred yards away so we could both take care of our needs. "Hey Leah, do you feel like changing?"

"What do you mean, like a different animal or a wolf?" I came out from hiding and he was digging through his pack.

"Well, actually, I was thinking about bathing suits. I wouldn't expect a thaw for a few more months, and the lake water is warm if you want to brave it." We were standing in several inches of snow and the thought of swimming was crazy.

"Sounds like fun, but I don't have a bathing suit." I smiled, wondering what he would think about my adventurous spirit.

"Well....you could swim in your bra and panties and pretend it was a bathing suit. You've got extra dry clothes to change into after you get out. Come on Leah, it'll be fun!" He looked at me like he expected me to chicken out. I remembered cliff diving at La Push and knew I couldn't back out of a little bit of mid winter swimming, especially if it was a challenge!

"Okay, you're on!" I headed back toward the lake as he gathered up his pack. I found a closer place to leave my clothes and we dropped the packs. I unlaced the hiking boots and took off all the socks trying not to wince at the cold snow. "Remember, it's a bathing suit!" I looked him in the eye as I pulled off the jeans. He followed my lead and undressed down to the shorts he wore underneath. I pulled off my sweater last and I heard him catch his breath. "Bathing suit you lech!" I pushed him hard and took off running while he was off balance. I felt him on my heels as I sprinted toward the water.

I didn't pause at the edge, but dove in cutting the surface in a shallow dive that would have been fine even if the water were only two feet deep. But as I surfaced and tread water I realized it was _much _deeper, and warmer than I expected. He hit the water a second after I surfaced, not with an elegant dive, but with a huge cannonball splashing water into my face like a wave from the ocean! He came up beside me laughing as I splashed him in the face for feeble revenge.

"You know we'll never get the animals to come back after that entrance!" I scolded. "Why'd you try to drown me!"

He swam circles around me. "The animals will come back just fine." he slipped his arms around me, holding me loosely face to face. "I wasn't trying to drown you, but why do you always feel the need to run from me, Leah?"

"Always? What do you mean 'always?' I mean it's not as if we've known each other more than a day....three days if you count my time as a wolf. Didn't I agree to stay? Didn't I just follow you all the way into the middle of nowhere? I'm not 'always' running away, I'm just faster than...." he cut me off before I could get into a full 'old Leah' tirade that was headed for the words clingy and overbearing. His arms tightened around me and he kissed me hard.

The attraction I felt for him was magnified by the warm water and that we were barely dressed. His hair floated around me in the water and I wrapped my arms and legs around him, kissing his mouth fiercely, sweet strawberries washed in a mountain stream. I felt his hands gliding along my skin as his strong legs kicked to hold us both above water. In that moment I had to wonder if I hadn't imprinted on him, just a day later! There was only Kyle, no animals, no pack, and no past relationships. I wanted to be with him more than anything else. He pulled back from me and I watched him catch his breath before smiling down at me.

He then started to swim with me, one arm pulling me along the shore of the lake with his strong legs easily keeping us both afloat. He found the place he was looking for and we rested on some large flat rocks submerged just under the water. It was perfect, we could sit and still be shoulders deep in the warm water. "The water's great, but the bottom is a murky, muddy mess." We relaxed on the rocks and I tried to think about anything but Kyle, but every time I turned my head he was there, glistening in the water with his face turned to the sky. Was I in love with him? Already? I knew I wanted him physically at least. If he had made his move a few minutes before I might have gone along with him, but was that love? I was beginning to see that what I'd felt for Sam didn't even come close to what I now felt for Kyle. Like the difference between a little girl's crush and a woman's desire.

He looked over at me and caught me watching him. "I'm glad I brought you to this place. It's special to me." He pointed to a stand of trees. "I set up a shelter over there and that's where I studied all the animals that came here. It's where I first saw the grizzlies, eagles, and foxes I used as my models. I wanted to share it with you, Leah. He pulled me to him and when we kissed I knew I was in love with him! I held him tight to me and knew that no one would take this man from me, ever! When his lips left mine I still wanted more. I thought about making love with him right then and there as I smiled up at him.

He looked me in the eye and stroked my cheek. "I love you Leah! I feel like I've been waiting for you for.....half my life, and now that I've found you I don't ever want to let you go. I know you said you needed time, and I'm willing to wait as long as it takes. But I'm all in; no games, no holding back, no second thoughts. I'm in love with you, and I want you more than anything!" He kissed me again and I tasted him, warm honey on a sunny beach. I loved him, and I wanted him too. He drew back from me and looked down at me with adoration and desire. "Will you marry me Leah? I know it's too soon, but I know I'm not going to change my mind. I want you to be my wife, my partner, and my love, for as much of forever as we may have.

My jaw dropped. I couldn't think of one thing to say. Marriage! I wanted to make love and he was thinking of something more permanent! I didn't doubt I loved him, what I doubted was if I had what it took to make it last! He was looking at me expectantly, wanting an answer. "Kyle....I just don't know what to say...."

He kissed me and smiled. "That's easy, just say yes. Three little letters to make me the happiest man in the world. Or you could say 'I love you Kyle.....'"

"I do!" I interrupted his playful cajoling.

"Not yet, 'I do' comes during the ceremony! Right now you just need to say 'yes.'" His manner became suddenly intense and he kissed me passionately like he would convince me with a kiss. I could feel my heart hammering in my chest and I wanted to say yes to anything he wanted. But when he pulled back and looked at me I couldn't make my mouth work to say it.

I couldn't stand to see the ghost of disappointment and hurt in his eyes. I stroked his cheek and slid my fingers through his hair. "Kyle, I'm not saying no. But you've been three steps ahead of me since I met you, and that's only been a day ago! I know you think you know me already, but you don't. I can be rude, selfish, antagonistic, and mean....and that's at the best of times! I'm not always this nice; you've only seen the best of me so far. I'm over my old relationship, I know that now for sure. But I'm not sure I didn't poison it and make it go wrong. I don't trust myself since my heart lied to me before! And speaking of lies, I won't even go into how much it hurt when Sam broke every promise he ever made to me!"

"I'm really surprised at how fast this is moving. I met you yesterday, and today I'm already crazy about you! I love you more than I've ever loved anyone else, Kyle. But I don't know if that's enough! It's been my experience that things just have a tendency to go wrong where I'm concerned. I don't want to jinx this! I keep waiting for the fates to wake up and realize they haven't screwed with Leah in a while and it's time to give her chain another yank! I've had the wind knocked out of me so many times I'm often afraid to breath. I've got scars Kyle. And they're not the kind you can see, but they hurt when you touch them and I have a tendency to overreact. I don't even want to tell you what they call me back home, and I know I've earned every word." I didn't want to look at him even though I could feel him watching me and his arm was snugly around me.

"Kyle, you're such a good man." I finally looked his way. "I can't believe you can feel the way you do about _me_! I couldn't have dreamed you up even if I'd have tried; you're almost too good to be true! There's a part of me that wants to look for where you've buried the bodies, or find the skeletons in your closet." I smiled up at him. "I love you. And I would have bet money that it wasn't possible for me to feel so much for a man ever again. And that scares the hell out of me! I trust _you_ Kyle, it's me that I don't trust. You're the best thing that's happened to me in a very long time. I'm in love with you and I just don't want to mess it up!"

I watched his face go from concern to confusion and then to happiness. "That's enough for me!" He kissed me then held me close. "I love you Leah Clearwater, and if you love me too then I know someday you'll be my wife! I can wait until you're sure. Until then I'll be sure enough for both of us." He smiled then and kissed me so thoroughly he took my breath away. I was still a little giddy when he let me go and stood up on the rock. He leaped into the air in a perfect arc and cut the water so cleanly he barely splashed.

When he surfaced he called to me. "If we want to get any swimming in we should hurry since we're running out of time. Watch this!" He threw something at me and I caught his shorts just before he ducked under the water. When he surfaced again he wasn't Kyle, but a large otter splashing around. I wrung the water out of his shorts and threw them onto the shore. I stood up and dove in, trying to chase him but I wasn't nearly the swimmer he was. He played tag with me, sometimes letting me catch hold of his tail and sometimes bumping me from surprising directions. It was fun playing with him, but I wanted to be with Kyle, not the otter.

"Come on Kyle, fun's fun, but I'd rather be with _you_ than the zoo!" He dove down and came up with a crayfish in his paws, swimming on his back and dissecting it as he munched away on the pieces. "Oh, now that's attractive! Tell me am I supposed to kiss that mouth later? I mean didn't we pack a lunch?" I pretended to be grossed out as I teased him. He really was adorable and I was impressed at how completely he was transformed. He paddled over to me, popped out of the water and momentarily pressed his wet whiskered face to mine as if he were giving me a kiss, then he was gone before I had a chance to retaliate. When he surfaced again he was at the water's edge and he snagged his shorts as he waddled toward the trees shaking the water from his fur.

I swam back to the rock and made a clean jump to the shore. I walked around to where our clothes and packs were, leaving wet footprints in the snow. When Kyle joined me he grinned and pulled me into his arms, then kissed me without a hint of what he'd just eaten. He then quickly went through the packs and pulled out towels and clothes for both of us. I hurried for cover dreading that I would have to take off everything before I could get warm and dry.

As soon as we were dressed we pulled our lunch out and ate. "Did you know that otters have to eat a lot?" He took a break from his second sandwich and I had to laugh at how awkward the question sounded. He laughed along with me and then went on. "I wasn't trying to gross you out, I just got hungry and that little lake is full of great things to eat....if you're an otter. Leah, there's so much I'd like to teach you, and show you! I want to swim with you as an otter, and fly with you as an eagle, and someday even romp along on an iceberg as a pair of polar bears! I feel like everything I have in my life has just gotten better now that I have you to share it with!" His enthusiasm was so infectious that I was starting to see what he saw too. "So, is there an animal you'd like to try to learn more about? One that you want to change into next?"

I tried to think about all the choices and what benefits each of them had. I really wanted to learn to change into an eagle and fly, but there was a bit of fear of falling that I worried would hold me back. The bears still intimidated me and the otter was so different from what I was used to being. "I like the fox." He looked confused and I had to laugh. "It's close to what I'm used to being, and I I've seen one up close and personal very recently." I grinned.

He looked thoughtful for a second then laughed. "You know I hadn't even thought that you could use me for a model! I was thinking that you would need to spend hours or even days in the wild trying to learn and observe, but I guess I can show you better myself. There's certainly less risk of getting bitten or chased."

I gave him a mock pout face, "does that mean you won't bit me or chase me? What fun is there in that?" He looked puzzled for a second, then his eyes met mine and I saw him suppress a grin. I leaped up and took off running before he took his first step and in seconds we were both bounding around the snowy lake shore in a fierce game of tag. He behaved the same as a man as he did as a wolf, and I used my speed and agility to counter his longer strides. I knew I could lose him in the trees and I heard him call my name as I dashed through the woods with him close behind me.

I was so worried about Kyle behind me it was too late to avoid what was in front of me. The mother bear had her two small cubs behind her and she was on her hind legs directly in front of me snarling her threat. I stopped too late to avoid the attack; four hundred pounds of snarling mother bear charged into me and her first swipe knocked me into a tree hard enough it would have seriously hurt or killed a normal human. I didn't want to attack the mother so changing into another adversary wasn't what I wanted to do. I heard the snarl and felt a blaze of heat behind me as Kyle changed. But the mother bear didn't recognize his threat, she was coming for me! I closed my eyes and concentrated to block out the disaster about to happen. I changed just as she reached me and I thought she'd once again launched me with her attack only this time I didn't land in the trees, but flew through the air. I beat my wings and soon climbed above the trees looking down at the two bears confronting each other below.

I was flying! The thought almost sent me tumbling to the ground and I had to beat my huge wings to take myself back into the sky. I caught a warm current of air and spread my wings their full eight foot span and glided in a huge circle, trying to catch sight of the encounter below. I saw the bears running along, a mother and her two cubs being followed at a distance by a huge lumbering bear who was obviously allowing them to escape. I soared higher as the current carried me toward the sun. It was exhilarating and I didn't want to come back down. I saw the bear below as it turned and went back to the site of the attack. Kyle! I didn't know if he saw what had happened. Would he think that I had run off again as a wolf? I dove, folding my wings tightly to my body as I saw my target rushing to meet me. I pulled out of the dive at the last second, unfurling my wings to stop my free fall. It was incredible as I lead with my strong talons to grab a hold of my quarry and landed almost gracefully on the shoulders of the huge grizzly bear!

Leah wanted to laugh, to shout with joy, but the huge golden eagle just blinked and kept watch from her unsteady perch. The bear stood still, and the eagle flapped into the low branches of a nearby tree to watch it. The bear wandered to a pile of torn rags and pawed through what was left of Kyles clothes; all were ruined including the coat and boots. It roared and the eagle blinked impassively. It's not my fault, I didn't tell you to change, I thought. The bear wandered away, heading back toward the place we'd left our lunch and our back packs. I flew along behind, but soon realized I had to go higher so the trees weren't a danger.

When I descended again he had already changed back to Kyle and was digging through the packs I landed behind him and it took the eagle a few seconds to realize he was still naked. I launched myself into the air again and flew high over the lake. I could see so much from so far away! If I hadn't just eaten I knew I would be able to catch fish from the lake as I timed their jumps and knew exactly how I would dive to grab them from the surface. I flew over the woods, following the tracks of the bears and I watched them climb into a small den not far from where we'd been playing. They must not have been hibernating yet. Ether that or they didn't sleep very deeply with such a plentiful food source nearby.

After about fifteen minutes I saw a white flash from where Kyle was. He stood behind a rock waving his sketch pad at me, then he changed again and I saw the bear trotting away from the packs and our things. I swooped down and saw that he'd packed up everything except for a piece of paper he'd left weighted down with a rock. It was hard to read since my eagles eyes weren't good at interpreting the lines on the paper. I finally changed back, knowing that Kyle was already out of range to see me. The paper was a note.

'Leah, I didn't expect to need extra clothes today, though I brought several things for _you_ to wear nothing will fit me. I'm sure I could fashion something to wear, but I don't quite trust myself to walk with you so uncovered. I left some clothes for you to wear, and we can go back for the ones in the woods, you're going to need the shoes, I'm sure! I've put everything into one pack and it shouldn't be too heavy for you to carry without the food and water. I can help if you need me to, but bears are hard on back packs.

I tried to warn you about the bears! You scared me to death; I thought she was going to kill you! See, I told you not to keep running away from me! It took me a while to realize you'd changed and I thought...never mind what I thought! You are a beautiful golden eagle! And I thought you weren't paying attention today when we were observing. Leah, I'm so proud of you! I wish I could celebrate with you, but I want to get back home safe as soon as possible. I'll be back as soon as you are ready to go. I love you Leah!'

I scrambled into my clothes and stuffed the socks into my pockets until I could get my shoes. The pack was a little heavier, but not more than I could handle. I looked over the area to make sure it was cleaned up and headed back to where my other clothes were left. I found my clothes and discovered that my bra and top were destroyed, but my pants and shoes were still fine. I picked up all but the smallest scraps and stuffed them into the pack.

Kyle the bear ambled up to me as I was surveying his shredded clothes. "I thought you had this part of the change licked. I guess your clothes can't withstand a bear attack." I smiled up at him. "I think I might as well leave these scraps here for nesting materials. The bear nudged me and almost knocked me over. "Kyle, you are one big bear! That mama bear didn't stand a chance against you! I saw her and the cubs climbing into a den not too far from here, so I'm sure she's okay. It might be a good idea if we take a wide circle around so we don't disturb her again." I took a minute to put on socks and shoes and then started out walking with him poking along leading the way. "I'm sorry to slow you down like this."

He lead til we reached a large rock then stopped. "What's up Kyle?" He put his large paws up on the rock and looked at me. "I don't get it, what's with the rock?" He stepped back then nudged me toward the rock. "You want me to climb up on the rock?" He nudged again. "Fine, but I still don't get it." I climbed up and looked around. It was only about four feet off the ground, and everything looked the same. He came over and leaned his body against the rock, then growled at me. "No way! You want me to climb on your back? Kyle, there's got to be some reason people don't ride bears, and I'm not sure I want to be the one to find it!" He turned and grabbed my pant leg in his teeth, pulling me closer to him with a low grunt. "Fine, but you're going to be the one to explain it when someone gets a video of some woman hiker riding a bear through the woods!"

I climbed onto his back and adjusted the pack. I sat close to his shoulders and leaned forward to grab two fistfuls of thick fur. "I must be crazy. Let's go!" He started out walking, but as soon as he realized I wasn't going to hit the ground he moved faster. In a few minutes he was running and I was clinging to his back as he ran about thirty miles an hour through the snow. If I hadn't had more strength than the average human I would have easily slipped off with his jarring gait. But I held tight and in less than an hour we were in sight of his house. I slipped off under cover of the woods just in case one of the rare boats or planes was passing nearby. I walked back to his home and continued down the beach so he could change and get dressed in privacy. I watched the whales in the distance and realized how much I was beginning to love it there. I was deep in thought when he came behind me and put his arms around me

I leaned against him and smiled up at him. "This place is so beautiful Kyle, you must really love it here." I felt the soft worn cotton of his shirt and his smell faintly drifting to me despite the wind off the ocean; cinnamon rolls by a wood fire. I turned in his arms to face him. "I love you Kyle." I smiled up at him, suddenly noticing his serious face. "What's wrong? Did something happen?" I started looking around for something that was causing his troubled expression. "Kyle, what is it? Tell me!"

He let go of me and walked back along the beach a few yards. I watched his back as he ran his hands through his hair then looked out over the ocean. He looked so tense and I almost went to him when he stopped at the water's edge and yelled. I almost jumped at the sound; pure frustration, hurt, and anger tearing up out of him. When he turned and came back to me in a rush I was almost afraid of him. He grabbed me and pulled me tight into his arms and kissed me hard on the mouth. His arms were so tight around me it was hard to breath and his hand on the back of my head kept me from breaking away from his kiss. For about a dozen heartbeats my world was nothing more than Kyle and his kiss. His lips on mine, his taste, his arms around me, his body pressed against me, and his eyes locked onto mine.

When he suddenly let me go I staggered a bit without his arms to hold me up. But then his hands were on my shoulders and he was looking down at me still serious. "I'm sorry! I was hoping that I'd be over it by the time we got back here. But the whole way back all I could think about was how I'd almost lost you, Leah! I saw that bear knock you into a tree and I saw my whole world end! I've seen maulings before Leah, and I can still see you getting hit and lying there! I thought you were dead! I felt like I'd only just found you to lose you forever! I wanted to kill that bear! If it hadn't been for the two cubs I would have torn her to pieces! How could you be so reckless! That lake is a source of food for a lot of animals; predator and prey alike....you should know better! I can't believe you just charged into the woods like you haven't got a brain in your head!" He was yelling at me and his hands were digging into my shoulders.

At first I was overwhelmed by his anger, but then what he said started to piss me off! I couldn't believe he'd just called me reckless and stupid! I brought my arms up between his and broke his grip on my shoulders with practiced ease. "I can't believe you just said that to me! Just who do you think I am! I'm not Bella.... I mean, I'm not some fragile flower that's going to break if I fall!" I was mad, and I was yelling back at him. I was getting in his face even if I had to look up at that face. "I'm tougher than you think! I'm almost as tough as you, and if you hadn't been there I would have survived just fine! Do you think I made it all this way on my own by sheer luck?!" I advanced on him as he retreated a step with the force of my anger. "I don't care how old you are or how long you've been waiting for me, you're not my father! I am a strong, independent woman and if you're looking for someone you have to guard and protect and treat like a baby then you just better keep on looking!"

"Maybe someone _should _protect you!" he countered. "You're reckless and you don't have any regard for your own safety!"

"You're being ridiculous! We're at the top of the food chain! In case you haven't noticed I'm not hurt....not even a scratch! And even if you hadn't been right behind me, and even if I hadn't been able to change into an eagle and fly away, I could still become a wolf and outrun the stupid bear! I've only run into two things that could give me any challenge at all, and _you're_ one of them!"

"And what if it had been the other thing that could challenge you? What then? You'd have charged right in and it would have been over!" he looked triumphant as he used my words against me.

"The only other challenge I've had Kyle has been newborn vampires! If we'd have found ourselves facing bloodsuckers today, then we would have both been in danger, and it wouldn't have mattered how we ran into them. Do you really think a harmless game of tag is going to stir up a den of vampires Kyle? Or is there another reason you want me to feel stupid, reckless and helpless?" I recognized the old Leah just as my anger had run it's course. I was remembering how Jacob had almost gotten killed because I was overconfident in fighting the newborn vampires. "I'm a lot more careful than you give me credit for, and I'm not helpless. And if you want to say I'm stupid, or that I 'haven't got a brain in my head,' well, the only reason that applies is because I've once again put myself in a position where a man can make me feel like this!" I could feel the tears in my eyes and I wiped them quickly before they could fall.

I turned away and started walking quickly up the beach. "Leah, don't go!" I heard him following me and I didn't slow down. He caught up and grabbed me by the shoulder. "I'm sorry.....please don't go!" I could hear the desperation in his voice and I realized he thought I was leaving and going away.

"Let go of me! I'm not leaving....I just want to be alone for a while – even if you think I'm too stupid or frail to handle that!" I could see my words hit home. "I love you Kyle, but right now I don't _like _you and I'd rather be alone!" I turned and kept walking, leaving him standing on the beach behind me. I walked two hours up the beach listening to the wind and the waves. When I was out of sight of his home and I could see nothing but empty beach I slipped behind a tree and undressed. I made sure my clothes were protected from animals and the tides then I concentrated and changed. I loved flying and this time I soared out over the ocean, making sure I kept in sight of the land as I followed the pod of whales I'd been watching earlier. I fixed the tree where I'd changed in my sights and knew I'd be able to find it again even among all trees and the miles of shore.

The winds over the ocean made flying different than it had been over land. I had to fly higher to find the air currents to glide. What I wanted was to watch the whales, and in minutes I was over the pod I'd seen. I'd thought it was Orca's, but instead it was Beluga whales! I had to remind myself that whales could leap out of the water and even a bird of prey could still become prey if I wasn't careful. I soared along watching them from a safe distance, noting the difference between the adults and the young calves. There were about thirty in all, and they were delightful to watch as they interacted with each other and fed along the ocean floor nearer the beach than I expected. In some ways they reminded me of large white dolphins. I took breaks often, flying back to land and roosting in a tree to rest. As soon as the sun began to set I flew back to where I'd left my clothes. I changed and dressed for the long walk back up the beach. I stayed alert for anything that might cause me a problem, and I watched the sun set in brilliant shades of pink and orange as it slipped into the water.

I'd been gone most of the afternoon and I was no longer mad at Kyle. In fact I was thinking about how nice it would have been to share the sunset with him instead of watching alone. I tried to see his point of view and remember that he was of a different generation than I was. But I wasn't going to stand for him treating me like I was somehow incompetent just because I was a woman. And he couldn't treat me like I was fragile either. If I was going to stay with him it had to be on more equal terms. If I was going to spend my life with him it would have to be more......

**Sorry to leave it off here but this was the best break before the next chapter. Let me know what you think about it since it's my first and only story on the site. I'm a sucker for reviews, please keep reading! **


	4. Chapter 4 Love

Chapter 4.

Love

It suddenly hit me that our argument had distracted me from the fact that he'd asked me to marry him! There was so much to think about, from the bear attack, to my first new change, to the realization that I loved him, to his proposal, and our first argument. I was nearly back, but I still wanted some time to think. I found a fallen log far from the shore and kicked the snow off to sit down. I was in love! Suddenly all I could think about was Kyle. I remembered our argument and I wondered if he really believed all the things he'd said about me. I wanted him to respect me, and I knew myself well enough to know that if he didn't then there was no way I'd ever marry him.

So what did my life look like if we didn't get married somewhere down the road? I could see myself in competition with him, always trying to prove myself and earn his respect. I felt the tears start and this time in the dark I let them flow, at least there was no one to see. Maybe I could take it for a little while, but I knew sooner or later it would make me leave. I was in love with him and he said he loved me too. In fact I believed he'd imprinted on me, or bonded to me in some way. But apparently that bonding didn't cover what he thought of me. It just meant that he'd have to accept the stupid, reckless, empty-headed, fragile ninny and hope she didn't get herself and him killed.

I felt a fresh wave of tears and they were starting to make me mad. I wiped my eyes and stood up. I'm not a crybaby and I wouldn't hide out on the beach all night! Kyle needed to know where I stood. I would rather end it sooner rather than wait until I felt like my whole world was wrapped up in him. Stupid tears! I wiped a fresh stream as I headed back. If I felt this much for him in two days, what would I feel in a week? Could I leave after a month, or would I be so wrapped up in loving him that I would endure all of his mistaken ideas about me? Maybe the old defensive Leah could do that, but I knew I'd come too far to go back to that now.

I'd have to leave, and soon! Maybe in the morning I could find an excuse to go off alone, and just never come back. I'd leave him a letter explaining why but I couldn't tell him ahead of time; I couldn't stand to watch him go through the loss. I knew I could get away from him, but I also knew it would hurt more than Sam's break-up had....a lot more! Why did love have to be so complicated! Why did it seem that life was out to get me again?

I was still crying when I caught sight of his home. No lights showed to the outside and if I hadn't known it was there I could have easily walked by it. I imagined him inside by the fire, with his scent touching everything. Or maybe he was painting in the back room, capturing another beautiful animal on canvas. I wanted to be with him, and yet I had to leave! I felt my silent tears suddenly gain a voice and the sound of my sobbing was washed away in the wind from the ocean. It didn't stop there, but built to a wail as I felt my heart breaking.

I saw the form coming down the beach, running to me. I couldn't see through my tears, but I knew it was him. I tried to turn off the crying, or at least turn away, but it was too late to try to control it. I felt my shoulders heaving and when he pulled me into his arms I was too overwrought to fight him, and still I cried. "I've been waiting for you to come back Leah.....I'm so sorry I said those awful things! Please don't cry Leah, I'm an idiot!" All I could do was wrap my arms around him and cling to him.

"Why aren't you in your house? What are you doing outside? Did you think I was going to get lost and need rescuing?" I wasn't angry, just curious.

"No, it's not that at all! I know you won't get lost, and I know you didn't want to see me following behind you. But I couldn't go in there without you! Leah I love you! I've been worried sick about you the whole time you were gone. Not because I think you're helpless and can't take care of yourself, or that you're reckless or stupid.....even though I never said that. I've been worried sick because I was afraid you wouldn't come back! I know you said you would, and I know you said you love me, but you were pretty angry, and I said some pretty bone-headed things." He held me tight and kissed my forehead.

"Leah, you're right, I forgot you're like me. I'm so amazed to find you and I love you so much that it just slips my mind that not only can we change, but we are both remarkably tough, strong, and difficult to kill. I just thought you were ….the woman I love in danger and I forgot everything else." He was looking down at me and wiping the tears from my face.

"Kyle I need to know how you see me and how you will be treating me in the future. Having your respect is important to me too. I need to know if you really think I'm fragile, reckless, and brainless."

"No, of course not! I admit I was angry today; that bear should have been asleep in some den until around March. She was almost as much of a surprise to me as she was to you. You're so fast, I didn't have time to warn you. I don't know who I was more upset with, the bear for being in the wrong place, you for running from me, or probably myself for not being there in time to keep you out of danger. All I could see was that angry mother bear hitting the woman I love into a tree like a rag doll! I was so upset I didn't even see you change, then I had the bears to chase away. By the time I came back all I saw was a pile of shredded clothes. I thought that I was too late!" He choked on the words and squeezed me tight.

"Leah, for just a moment I thought that I wouldn't be able to live without you. I could see my life stretching out in an endless, lonely eternity, and know that I'd had someone to love and lost her. It was more than I could stand! I guess what bothers me the most isn't about you so much as it's about me. I'm so wrapped up in you already! It's not that the choice has already been made, but there was never a choice to be made! I love you; I always have and I always will." He relaxed his hold on me as he looked down, locking his gaze onto mine.

"It's just so much easier for you! You can take care of yourself. You can be independent and come and go as you please. You don't _need _me! You get to _decide _if you want to be with me. I know it's not your fault if I stop breathing at the thought of losing you forever. But it does make me angry sometimes that I'm helpless to follow after you! And it's agonizing that you don't feel this connection the way I do! I _need _you Leah! Everything I have, everything I am; it's yours." I watched him and knew he was telling me the truth and that it was hard for him.

"You want to know what I think of you; how I will treat you and do I respect you? I adore you and I will treat you like you are my reason for living. No one will respect you more than I will. Because I will _see_ the things that others might miss. I know about your past heartbreak, and I can feel how much it bothers you that people think less of you. And I know that you have triumphed over your past. And I am so awed that you've come so far on your own. I'm proud of the way you have learned so quickly what took me such a long time to learn. I'm impressed with the woman you are, and that you're not afraid to stand up to me. I'm also worried that you have already found my weaknesses. What am I in for with a woman like you? It's not my intention to compete with you; I want to be your partner Leah." He tipped my chin up and kissed me softly.

"I love you, I need you, and I respect you Leah. And if you don't stop crying I'm going to lose my mind! What's wrong love?" He wiped my face with his big hands and I smiled.

"I don't know why I'm crying, Kyle. The tear started and I can't shut them off!" I smiled helplessly. "They started when I first thought I might have to leave, but even though I'm not they still keep going! I hate this! I'm usually not this emotional!" I wiped my face on my sleeve

"You thought you were going to leave? Oh Leah!" He looked panicked and I realized I hadn't meant to say it.

"Don't worry, I'm not going anywhere. I was just thinking that I wouldn't be able to stand it if you were helplessly in love with someone you didn't like or respect. I thought it would be better to leave as soon as I could before I was even more in love with you. But it's already too late; as soon as I thought of it I started crying and I haven't been able to stop. If I left now I'd have to tear my heart out and leave it here with you! I'd have to find some animal that I could change into that had no feelings, and stay that way!" I put my arms around him tight. "It seems I don't have as much choice as you think I do! I've never felt like this before; it scares me how much I love you already." I rested my cheek against his shirt and listened to his strong heartbeat. As his arms tightened around me I could feel the tears finally slowing to a stop. I belonged with him and I was just starting to get an idea that our bond went both ways.

We held each other tight and I snuggled against him enjoying his scent; muffins under a starlit sky. "Yes." I said to the man in my arms.

"What's that Leah?" He stroked my hair and I felt him kiss the top of my head.

"I just answered your question."

"What? I didn't ask you any question. What question?" He sounded confused.

"You asked me a question earlier today, before we met the bears." He was quiet and still, as his hands moved through my hair and down my back.

"Was it an important question?" he asked, and I could tell he was on the right track.

"I think it was important." I heard his heartbeat speed up, or maybe it was just my imagination.

He tipped my face up so he could look at me. "Was the question, 'will you marry me Leah?'"

"That's the one!" I smiled. "Do you still want an answer?"

"That depends. I want the _right _answer. But yes I still want an answer. Will you marry me Leah?" No doubt his heart was beating faster; it was matching mine.

"Yes Kyle, I'll marry you!" When we kissed I knew that I had made the only choice I could have made. I loved him and I knew I couldn't spend my life anywhere else but with him. Whatever differences we had we'd have to work them out because leaving wasn't an option for either of us.

He lifted me up and carried me to his door. Once inside we ate a late dinner and went about the normal things like taking showers and washing the dishes. It seemed so odd that I was thinking of one of the most important steps in my life while normal life happened around me. How much would change when he was my husband I wondered as he handed me a plate to dry, standing beside me at the sink. Would we stay here or move somewhere else. I thought about it as the water drained from the sink. No, I hoped we could stay right where we were; it already felt like home to me. He took the towel to hang it up and pulled me to him.

"I love you Leah, my fiance! Do you have time for making plans, or are you too tired from your day?" He kissed me then and my mind skipped forward to bedtime. Would our commitment mean that we would make love tonight?

"Kyle, when you hold me like this and kiss me, there's only one kind of plan I can think about." I looked up at him and smiled slowly. "Are you thinking the same thing I'm thinking?"

I heard him catch his breath. "Don't tempt me like that Tikaani; I'm not that strong where you're concerned! I think we need to make other plans; the faster I can make you my wife the better I'll like it. And _then _we can make those kinds of plans...anytime you want!"

We sat up for hours into the night planning a wedding. We were going to go back to my home so he could meet my family. He also wanted me to meet his sister since she was the only one who still accepted him. The others had drifted away from him as they realized he wasn't aging. He still saw his mother, but she actually thought he was his son. His father had died a few years before when he took his fishing boat out and drowned. He was in his eighties and Kyle suspected he did it intentionally. I wanted to get married with my family around me in the traditional tribal way. The details didn't matter to me any more. What I had in mind would certainly pale in comparison to what Sam and Emily did, but I didn't care. All that mattered was that we would belong to each other on paper and legally like we already did in our hearts.

He filed a flight plan for two weeks, and I knew shortly after we'd be married. I wasn't worried since I'd sent a message through Jacob to let my mother and everyone else know what was happening. "Whatever Mom wants I'll agree to, just keep it simple." I told him they could invite whoever they wanted, I had the right groom and nothing else mattered. I also warned him that we would be staying in Alaska afterward, and I'd probably be severing ties with his pack.

While I waited for the time to pass I practiced changing. A few nights after our engagement I was able to become a fox. For the first two mornings I woke up with him in bed beside me changed into the silver fox. On the third morning there were two foxes in bed. I thought he was going to hurt himself when he changed back so fast he almost forgot to cover himself! My third change had him more concerned than our bear encounter.

One morning I woke up early and went outside to watch the water. I saw a pod of whales and realized it was the Beluga's. I stripped down to my bra and underwear and waded into the freezing water. Once I was up to my neck I tossed my underwear out onto the beach. Kyle came out just as I'd started to swim their direction and I heard his frantic yelling from the shore. I swam back where he could hear me and assured him that I was fine and I'd be back soon.

As soon as the water was deep enough I concentrated on the music of the whales; their particular chirping noises and the way they moved. I dove down deep and closed my eyes and felt the water become my home. Even though it was deep for Leah, the white whales were limited so close to shore. I swam out flipping my strong tail through the water and surfaced to take in air through the hole in my head! It was just like Kyle had said, not pretending or imitating, but _becoming _the animal! The water was so warm and smooth as I hurried to catch up to the others. I stirred up a small school of fish and snacked on two before I realized it. Life was overwhelmingly joyous, and I leaped for the surface and cleared the water entirely before splashing back down.

I heard the first chirps when I was still a good distance from the pod. They were curious about me and welcoming as well. I easily communicated with them as I swam closer, and they used my help to corral a very large school of fish they were feasting on. And they played while they ate; while _we _ate. I told them I came from a much smaller pod and I wanted to see what theirs was like. They invited me to join them as they were swimming along the coast until the weather warmed up enough for calves. It was surprising how smart they seemed and how well their language communicated. Through their eyes and language I learned that I was a large and healthy looking whale, but they didn't understand why I liked to jump so much; did I have an itchy tail?

I'd lost track of time when I finally let them know that I was going back to my own pod, but that I hoped to see them again. I swam back, and it was easy to follow my own trail; I remembered how the water felt, and how the bottom looked and even how the air on the surface tasted. When I came back to where I changed I saw Kyle standing on the beach watching the water. I swam in as close as I could, and leaped in the air for him. I was too far out to splash him, but I know he saw me. I changed back to Leah and swam the rest of the way and called for him to toss my "bathing suit" to me. As soon as I left the water he wrapped me in a towel and held me tight.

"I don't think I'm ever going to get used to this!" He pulled me close and I snuggled into his warmth. "Leah, I don't know how you do that so easily; I've never even thought of changing into an ocean animal, and you go off and swim with whales! What's next, dolphins?" He groaned as my eyes lit up.

"I've found out something important. When we change we're always bigger than the normal animals. I mean I've seen that as a wolf, fox and the eagle, but I thought that was just because _I _was bigger than those animals. But I was also bigger as a whale; at least that's what they told me. That makes me believe that it has something to do with being a shape shifter. Everyone of us has a strong drive to protect, both ourselves and normal humans. If we're bigger than anyone else that would make it easier, wouldn't it? It might also explain why we are so much taller than other humans. I mean we're not _the _tallest, but there aren't many men who hit seven feet, and as far as other women go, six feet is pretty abnormal too."

"You've given this some thought haven't you? I mean what we are and how it all works." He walked with me back to the house and I scooped up my clothes on the way. "I guess I was just so convinced that I was the only one that I never gave it much thought."

"Well, I've been wondering for quite a while since for so long I wanted to get rid of whatever was making me change. I thought it was all about the anger, but I think that it's something else now. I'm not angry when I change now; I welcome it. And the changes are gentler too so I don't always destroy what I'm wearing. I think it's got more to do with wanting to settle down with a mate and maybe have children that makes us stop changing. Back home it's only the young that have changed. Those who are older and have families don't change no matter who their family is connected to. My father didn't change, but there are some very young ones who did. Your sister didn't change either. Since you are the youngest of your family I wonder if they are all married and have families?" He looked thoughtful.

"I have a brother in the village who never left. He still makes a living on the boats, but he spends his evenings in the bar. He's never had a wife or kids; I wonder why it didn't affect him?" He looked like he was getting interested in my thinking.

"I think that some things get in the way, like drinking or drugs. I think also settling down to start a family will change us too, at least according to the legends. I'm curious though if we'll have the same conclusion. Since we are both shape shifters, will we lose the ability by getting married and starting a family? I mean, I suspect that the ability isn't lost, but a choice is made. In our legends once the enemy is gone and the anger passes we stop changing. But what if it's about _choosing _to remain human? What if human isn't what we are naturally? What if we're compatible enough with humans that we _are_ human until our ability is needed to deal with our supernatural enemies?" I was getting excited by some of my ideas and observances.

"Kyle, what if we're some kind of guardian race? You said it yourself that as soon as you saw the vampire you knew what you were here for. What if we're some kind of defense against vampires and maybe other supernatural monsters? We have this amazing subterfuge that lets us stay hidden until we're needed. We have imprinting that lets us find just the right mate to pass on our traits. We have the ability to become animals which are bigger and stronger than we are normally. And we can communicate with each other in our group using telepathy! I can't think of a better protector! I'm also beginning to wonder if there's not some sort of collective racial memory. It would explain why my tribe automatically becomes wolves even though we don't have to. And maybe your tribe has something else they identify with, buried in some forgotten legend." I dried off and we went back inside.

In some ways I was more interested in finding out more about what we were than I was in getting married. In my heart and mind I was already his, the wedding was just a formality. In the two weeks leading up to our trip a package of my own clothes and things arrived and Kyle was able to pick them up from a nearby village. I enjoyed finally having my own clothes and there were also letters from my family. I wasn't sure if it was the distance or my divided loyalty that kept Jacob from knowing the extent of my news, but I couldn't wait to show my family what it meant to be a shape shifter.

By watching Kyle and studying him I was able to learn how to become a grizzly bear. I understood why he favored it since it was the most powerful thing I'd ever felt. I was still partial to the wolf since they were more about cunning rather than brute strength, but I imagined even if a bloodsucker could grab hold of us as a bear it would have much more difficulty causing damage.

I was starting to think like Kyle in wanting to learn how to become many different animals. But what I really wanted was to find out what we were in our natural shape. I was planning on doing some research as soon as the family reunion and wedding were behind me. I wanted to find out what kind of information there was on shape shifting. Considering both of our families were native to this continent I wondered how far back I would be able to trace our history. I wanted to go into legends and tribal history to see if I could find out what we were and how we came to be.

I was able to take time each day to either study an animal or practice changing. One day Kyle and I both changed into eagles and flew together. I wanted him to try a whale, but he hadn't had the chance to study them and the changes didn't come as easy to him as they did to me.

He took me one day to meet his sister and her family in the little village I'd watched when I was still a wolf. I was surprised at her age since she was in her early fifties and compared to her Kyle looked more like a son than a brother. She was kind and warm and welcomed us both for dinner. Her two youngest children were still at home, a lovely sixteen year old daughter and a seventeen year old son. His sister Lora didn't seem to have a problem with him, but she did ask how his father was doing and I realized she must have told her children that Kyle was her brother's son. The twenty-five year gap must be too much for her to try to explain. Her husband didn't make it for dinner, and she explained that he was going to eat dinner at the bar after he came in off the boat.

I made sure she knew she was welcome to come to our wedding, and I watched her daughter's eyes light up at the mention of it. I could see that her mother was looking for an excuse not to come, so I extended the invitation to her children as well. Kyle's niece was so excited she jumped up and hugged me as soon as her mother agreed to come. It would mean that Kyle would have to make another round trip right before the wedding or find someone to fly them down, but I knew it would be worth it to have his own family there. His niece/cousin's name was Ahnah, which was a traditional Inuit name and Kyle explained that it meant wise woman. Her brother was Akiak which meant brave.

Before we left that night Ahnah brought out a necklace and showed it to me. It was all hand carved white beads interspersed with small animal carvings; whales, bears, eagles, fish, seals, and wolves. "My uncle Kyle gave me this when I was little and I was very sick. He said the animal spirits were watching over me and I would soon get better. Mom said I had pneumonia and I got well not long after his visit." She handed me the necklace carefully. "Would you be able to wear this at your wedding? I think you're supposed to have something borrowed , and I definitely want this back!"

"I can't think of anything more perfect Ahnah! Thank you for letting me borrow your treasure." I hugged her and wiped my tears before she could see them; I must be getting soft!

"Will Uncle Kyle be at your wedding?" she asked with wide-eyed curiosity.

"No, I didn't give him enough time to make plans." Kyle answered. "He's up north on some polar bear tagging expedition and he won't be back until late spring."

"We're not having a very big wedding anyway." I explained. "In fact I'm not even sure of the exact date since I'm letting my mom plan the whole thing." As we were leaving we promised that we would let them know as soon as the date was set and we would make sure that they could make it to the wedding and back home again. We hugged them goodbye and I whispered in Lora's ear a thanks for the borrowed clothes.

The time went fast and before I knew it our trip was a day away. We packed up and loaded our suitcases in his pick-up truck. He hardly ever drove it and kept it hidden down a driveway into the woods. Kyle had done some routine maintenance on the plane to make sure it was ready for his trip. It was kept in a small hangar at a tiny airstrip a couple miles away. He assured me that the single engine aircraft was absolutely safe and that he was a good pilot with over 5,000 hours experience. It was once part of his job to fly. I wasn't worried since I knew that both of us could fly without benefit of a plane.

On the night before we were to leave we decided to change our routine. For two weeks we'd been taking turns changing into a fox so we could share the bed and not be tempted to go too far before the wedding. It was a comfortable way to sleep, at least for me since he was soft and warm to snuggle up against. When it was my turn to change it was more difficult for me to keep still and go to sleep. I often found myself staying awake just to look at him as he slept. On the last night we decided that neither of us would change and that we'd sleep fully dressed so we would be ready to go first thing in the morning. It was likely the last night we would share a bed before we were married.

I snuggled against him as he wrapped his arms around me. "I don't know how I'm going to sleep with you so close to me, Kyle. I'm going to miss you when we have to sleep apart. I'm excited to see my family again, but there's a certain amount of drama that comes with them."

"You mean to tell me your mother won't let a fifty year old man move in and sleep with her daughter?" I was already giggling before he finished his question.

"I never thought about it, but you're closer to my father's age than mine! We might want to keep your age a secret for as long as possible; Mom's a widow and I don't need the competition!"

"Leah! You know there's no competition....but what does your mom look like? – just in case you get cold feet." He teased me and tried to block as I slammed an old feather pillow into his head. The game was on and in seconds we were wrestling, swatting with pillows, tickling, pinching, and even biting. We were both laughing like kids and the bed was a mess! When he tossed me onto my back and sat astride my body holding my hands pinned, I was still laughing too hard to fight him. "Say uncle and I'll let you go!"

"Okay Kyle, that's enough, we have to put the blankets back on the bed and I think your lamp might be broken." I laughed and tried feebly to break free.

"Say uncle first! Better yet, say 'you are the strongest and the smartest, and I bow to your superior awesomeness!'" He grinned down at me

"Come on Kyle, this isn't funny." I tried again to break free, a little more insistent. "You keep this up and someone's going to get hurt!" I wiggled under him and he laughed. He bent forward and licked my nose and I tried again to dislodge him.

"Come on Leah, where's that sense of competition now? Have I finally found something that you aren't better at?" he leaned down and kissed my lips. "I never knew you to give up so easily. I guess you'll just have to admit it, just say 'Kyle is the strongest and smartest and I bow to his superior awesomeness!' and I'll let you go. I'll even let you say 'ditto' if you don't think you can remember it all." He was still laughing and playing. But it was starting to remind me painfully of the games I'd played with my pack back home where I always came out on the losing end.

I made one more attempt to throw him off, digging my feet into the mattress and giving a twisting thrust with my body trying to dislodge him. I almost succeeded but his size made the difference and he was still looking down on me after my best try. I closed my eyes and relaxed. I let my body go limp and stopped fighting. I laid perfectly still....and waited.

"Ready to say it Leah? I'll be happy to let you up then, just bow to the master!" I could hear his playful voice and I held still. "Come on Leah, don't be like that, you know I'm just playing with you." I could hear the touch of concern in his voice, but still he didn't let up. "Come on, is it so hard to just say 'ditto?' I won fair and square, you know I'm stronger than you, why can't you just say it?" He loosened his grip on my hands a little and still I waited patiently. "Come on Leah, talk to me.....I love you!" He raised up taking his weight off of me and I felt his hands relax their grip. I knew he could clamp down on me in a second if I moved, so I continued to lay silent and still.

I felt him relax and when he leaned forward to kiss me he wasn't taunting me anymore. I stayed still and pliant and silently counted slowly to ten as his lips caressed mine. On ten I struck. I caught his lip between my teeth and bit down, hard! At the same time I yanked my hands from his slack grasp and pushed his shoulders with all my strength as I shoved with my legs and body to overbalance him. Caught completely unaware he toppled sideways and landed on his back. I heard the lamp crash to the floor as it slipped from where it was lodged between the wall and nightstand. I was on top in a second, pinning him beneath me and holding his hands in mine.

"Kyle, you are the strongest and I am in love with your superior awesomeness!" I kissed him and noted that his bleeding lip was already starting to heal. "You may even be smarter than me, but you'll never get me to admit it." I kissed him again and he wasn't even trying to fight me. "You just forgot that wolves are the most cunning animals." I smiled down at him. "And everyone knows if you want to get away from a bear you just have to play dead!" I smiled down at him as he looked up at me with a stunned look on his face.

"I can't believe you bit me!" He looked like his feelings were hurt and I was suddenly worried that I'd gone too far. I let go of him immediately and was about to offer an apology when he grinned up at me. Lightening fast he flipped me and I was looking up at him again. "You're not the only sneaky one Tikaani!" He kissed me then, stretching out on top of me as I wrapped my arms around his neck. In seconds what started out as a game became serious. The man I loved was in my arms and we were alone in his bed. When he tore away from me it was all I could do to let him go. "Leah," he breathed, moving away from me, "I wish there was a way we could move that wedding date up....to about NOW!" He got out of bed and picked up the lamp which hadn't broken in the fall. "I don't know how I'm going to sleep here beside you like you're not the most desirable woman in the world!"

"What if we spend some time just talking? I can tell you all about my crazy family and friends, and that should take care of any passionate thoughts." I smiled at him and he laid back down keeping some distance between us.

"I still think it might be better if one of us changes. I tell you what, you start talking and If I still can't control myself in fifteen minutes I'll go canine." he smiled and I resisted the impulse to cuddle up next to him.

I spent some time telling him all about my family and friends. I told him about the Cullens and how their presence seemed to have brought about our change. I made sure to tell him the legends of the first werewolves, which I now had to think of as shape shifters. Some of the stories were easy, but some were difficult; especially those about Jacob and the pack split. It was also hard for me to talk about my dad's death even though my mom was getting better and seemed to be moving on. I wanted him to know everyone and feel like a part of my family, but I also wanted everyone to like him.

After I had been talking for a while I could tell Kyle was having trouble staying awake. I turned off the lights and laid in the dark listening to him breathing. I was feeling too excited to sleep. I was excited to be flying with him and I was eager to see my family again. I was also curious about when my wedding would be and what it would be like. All I could gather from Jacob's thoughts was that Mom was excited about the planning and it would be nice.

I laid awake for a while looking out at the moon on the water. I heard Kyle ask softly, "Are you awake Leah?"

"Yes, I can't sleep....am I keeping you awake?"

"Yes, but not because of what you're doing; I can't stop thinking about you. I wish we didn't have to be apart until the wedding; I'm going to miss sleeping beside you even if one of us is a dog. It means a lot to me that you chose to be with me and marry me even though I didn't give you much time. If you have any second thoughts we can still wait. I don't want you to feel like I pushed you into something you weren't ready to do." I could hear the uncertainty in his voice and I slid over and put my arms around him in the dark.

"I love you Kyle; more time isn't going to change that. Becoming your wife is just the legal part of it; I'm already yours. I am excited for you to join a large family who can accept who you are and what you can do. It is a secret among us, but you'll gain sixteen other brothers." I felt him squeeze me tight and I rested my head on his chest. I closed my eyes wrapped in his arms, his scent and his love.

I don't know when I drifted off to sleep, but in the morning we were snuggled together like we'd only just closed our eyes. We jumped up and got ready to go with a quick breakfast and some last minute preparations to secure his house. The drive to the airstrip was uneventful and we loaded our few bags into the plane.

I watched as he went through the pre-flight checklist, leaving none of the details to chance. There was room for six passengers, and still some space for luggage. In no time it seemed we were ready to go. He made sure I was buckled into the co-pilot's chair and he went through the last few checks before he taxied onto the small runway. I watched him fascinated as he guided the plane down the runway and in seconds we were airborne. We flew in silence for a while until the radio signals came in stronger. He kept in contact with air traffic control all along our trip.

One advantage to flying in such a small plane was that we could see so much of the scenery below us. From Alaska to Washington I was able to admire a lot of wilderness. We didn't talk much since the engine noise made it difficult to hear. I was also worried about being a distraction . When he spoke it was most often about the flight or the plane. "You need to learn to fly Leah; you'll love it! You learn so fast I'm sure you'll be an ace at this in no time. Besides it will be good for you not to have to depend on me so much; just in case something came up and you needed to travel and I couldn't take you. I know you like your independence."

"I thought the purpose of this trip was so I could give up on being so independent?"

He snapped his head my way so fast it almost dislodged his headphones. "Of course not! Leah, I don't want you to give up who you are! I love your independent streak, even when it scares the daylights out of me. It's who you are, it's how you came to me, and I don't want you to change it, Tikaani!"

"Do you mean that? I didn't think you liked me going off on my own or being so competitive." I looked at him as he once again concentrated on flying us through the fluffy clouds.

"Of course I mean it. I don't want to change you, I just want to be with you. Like I told you before, if I get worried about what you're doing, that my problem not yours." He reached over and held my hand so he could concentrate on keeping the plane steady through a patch of turbulence.

**Thank you to those of you who have read this far! Only 11 more chapters to go; it's worth it I promise.**

**Also I've started a new story about the Romanian vampire Stefan. It's much darker than this one and I'm excited about how it's unfolding. Look for Dark Roots: Stefan's Loves if you like my writing.**


	5. Chapter 5 Alpha

Chapter 5

Alpha

When we made it to our destination I wasn't surprised at all that he landed perfectly. Taking care of the plane post flight took a little more time than I expected and he'd already made arrangements to store the plane until he needed it again. He checked out the plane to make sure nothing had gone wrong on the trip and took out our two bags. We walked from the airfield to a parking lot and I saw a familiar truck parked and waiting for us. The driver got out and I ran to meet him and he caught me in his arms and swung me around. "Jacob! I can't believe Billy let you borrow his truck. I thought Mom was coming to pick us up, what happened?"

"Calm down Leah, everything's okay, she just had some preparations she needed to finish and she wanted to be ready when you got home. And I didn't think we could all fit in my car, especially if your fiance is as tall as you said he was." he looked past me to see Kyle walking our way. He let me go and reached out to shake Kyles hand. They could easily have been brothers, both of them so tall and strong, and I saw them both grin as they tested their strength in their handshake.

"Kyle, this is Jacob Black, you remember me telling you about him." I smiled as I saw him assess the other alpha male in my life.

"So, your the one I have to thank for showing my Leah how to go wolf and run away! I don't know how I can repay you." Jacob looked confused for a second then Kyle smiled to prove he was teasing. "Truly I am glad you let her go when you did. She's been a wonderful surprise and I can't tell you how much I love her!" It was the strangest thing for two men to be talking about, but Jacob was nodding.

"I know exactly how you feel!" I saw him get that distant stare I recognized. "That reminds me, we need to hurry up and get back, we're expecting a lot of rain later today which is supposed to turn to ice this evening, and the cover on the truck bed isn't completely waterproof. And of course I have plans later." He grabbed both of our bags and effortlessly stored them in the back of the truck, replacing the cover to keep them somewhat dry.

I sat between them on the drive home with my hand clutched tight in Kyles. I asked Jacob dozens of questions on the drive and he was glad to tell me what I'd missed in the months I'd been gone. One thing he wouldn't tell me was anything about my own wedding plans. "That's for Sue to tell, not me." He looked at me closely for a second. "You look different Leah, your hair's grown out quite a bit. It looks good. You also look like you've lost weight, or it's more like you've gotten stronger." He nodded. "I remember how it feels to only have survival to think about, hunting and traveling. But I'm glad you found what you were were looking for; even if you didn't know you were looking for it!" He smiled his brilliant white smile and I started to relax.

When we drove up to Mom's house I was surprised to see so many people come out to greet us. It felt like the whole village had turned out for my homecoming, and I ran to her and held her in a tight hug and suddenly I was crying like a baby! I realized I hadn't really said goodbye when I left, and I was suddenly desperate to see everyone again. Right behind Mom was Seth and he seemed to have grown in the short time I was gone. I hugged him too which seemed to catch him off guard. One by one I hugged my relatives and friends who had come out to see me. Overhead I heard a loud clap of thunder and suddenly the sky opened up dumping buckets of icy rain down on everybody. Everyone ran for the house or at least the roof overhangs while I stood getting drenched.

The old Leah would have been very upset. She might have even thought the world was playing a mean trick on her by raining on her homecoming party. But I was able to look up at the sky and laugh. I found Kyle also getting soaked at the edge of the crowd and I put my arms around him. "Now it feels like the home I remember! We get more rain here than most any other place. We should get inside before it starts to turn to ice! I lead him inside where it was almost too crowded to move. I went from room to room making introductions and finally someone handed me a towel. I passed it to Kyle who wiped his face and then used it to dry me as well.

I saw them in the corner and I would have missed them except for the way they held back while everyone else was pushing forward, trying to get my attention, an introduction, or a hug. Sam and Emily side by side standing near the door. I let go of Kyle's hand so I could move through the crowd easier. When I reached them I could see they were uncomfortable and likely ready for some kind of confrontation. I heard the noise die down as everyone watched expectantly, but I wasn't going to back down.

I watched Sam take a guarding stance but I didn't care. I smiled and threw my arms around Emily and hugged her tight. "I'm so sorry! I had no idea what it was like; I was so awful to you! I hope you both can forgive me!" I found myself crying as she hugged me back. "Your wedding was beautiful, I wasn't trying to ruin it, I promise. Did everything turn out okay after I left? Please, can we still be cousins and friends again?" Everything seemed to come out in a rush and it took me a minute to notice Kyle beside me looking warily at Sam. There was also one other slightly obvious change; Emily was pregnant!

My jaw dropped. "Oh Emily! I'm so happy for you!" She was smiling with her hand on her barely protruding stomach. I looked at Sam and he was still watching Kyle and me with a serious expression. I stepped close to him. I had to stand on tiptoe to reach his ear, and I spoke low so only he could hear. "I'm sorry I took so long to let go. Thank you for making the right choice. I'm really happy for you both." I kissed his cheek and stepped back to introduce them to Kyle. Kyle smiled warmly at Emily, but he seemed to be sizing up Sam. I took his hand and assured him, "there's no need for drama, it's as over as it can possibly get. When they shook hands there wasn't the strength competition as there was between Jacob and kyle. But even still there was a tension between them.

"I guess I should thank you for making my Leah so unhappy that she came to find me." He smiled like it was a joke, but I knew it wasn't. And so did Sam.

"Oh no you don't!" I stepped between the two of them. "No anger, no tempers!" I pulled him a step away. "Kyle, you know it wasn't his fault!" I looked up at him and realized he wasn't angry at Sam, but there was some kind of alpha male territorial thing kicking in. "Come with me please, now!" I lead him down the hall to what was once my bedroom. I was surprised to see it still almost the same as I'd left it, only cleaner.

I dragged him inside and shut the door. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him to me, kissing him like I had been dying to do since we'd left that morning. I could hear the rain hitting the tin roof and the distant thunder. He pulled me close and our clothes were still damp but it didn't matter. He tasted delicious and I didn't resist when he pulled me down onto my bed. I heard the bed springs squeak as he leaned me back and I felt his weight on top of me. I was drowning; assaulted by the familiar and his overwhelming presence. When the door burst in I had already convinced myself that there was nothing inappropriate about what we were doing.

Jacob leaned in the doorway with his big toothy grin. "Hey, break it up you two; I thought you wanted a white wedding, not a shotgun wedding! I actually heard Kyle snarl low and menacing at Jacob before he got control of himself again. This was going to be tougher than I thought.

"Jacob, can you give us a minute? Leave the door open, we'll be right out." As soon as he left I put my arms around Kyle. "Listen, this isn't you! You are the sweetest man I know and I know you're not this aggressive. Can you tell me what's going on?"

He looked down on me and I could see the confusion in his eyes. "I'm sorry Leah, it feels so strange. I know these people are your friends and family and I really do want to get along with them. But I also know that Jacob is your pack leader and Sam was your first love. I never thought I was the jealous type....no, I'm _not _the jealous type! But there's something else at work here and I think it's got something to do with them having a connection to you! Jacob doesn't feel as threatening to me; he's barely more than a boy. But Sam, knowing that he hurt you even though he didn't intend to, it makes me want to...." His fists clenched and I could see an intense anger working it's way through him.

"Kyle! Stop this! I'm happy and I'm not hurt. I love _you, _not Sam!" I wasn't having much luck getting him to focus on me and I was worried that there might be a large grizzly bear in my bedroom at any moment. I made him sit on my bed and I quickly removed his shoes. He barely noticed. I stood and left the room and I knew he would follow me. I kicked off my own shoes at the back door and I heard some of the guests calling my name as I fled out the back door into the icy rain. I sprinted for the trees knowing he would be right behind me, fearing that I was running away from him.

I took a second and shed my jeans then ran further into the woods. I heard him right behind me roaring; he'd changed into the grizzly and was fast approaching. So much for the sweater. I changed too, only I was the wolf, racing into the woods I knew like my own back yard. I knew he couldn't catch me unless I allowed it, and I wanted him as far away from people as I could get him. I ran fast and time didn't matter as I covered miles of distance, listening for the raging bear still hot on my trail. As soon as I hit the boundary lines I crossed them and ran right into enemy territory.

I could have wandered the woods for days and not made it to where I wanted to go, but I knew the route well and I followed my own scent straight to Bella's cabin. I raced to the door and my urgent bark had her opening the door to me. I hurried into the privacy of their bedroom and ducked into her massive closet to change back to myself. I pulled on something quickly and hurried back out with barely a second to stop the attack that was almost certain to happen when Kyle made up the lead I had.

He wasn't right behind me as I thought he was. I could hear him in the distance and knew he must have picked up the scent of the rest of the Cullen family. "No!" I didn't have time to explain to her as I raced back the way I'd just came. "Kyle!" I screamed. Something hit me from behind and it took me a second to realize Bella had picked me up on the run and was now carrying me along with her as she was much faster than I was in my human form.

We arrived barely in time to prevent a disaster. Kyle was in front of the Cullen house and he'd just stood up to his full height on two legs, roaring and threatening Jasper and Emmett who both looked ready to take on the challenge. When Bella let go of me I ran to him, calling his name. I stood in front of him begging him to calm down; that things weren't what he thought they were. When he dropped down onto all fours again I wrapped my arms around his neck and cried into his fur. "Remember I told you about the Cullen family? They're like the ones you saw in Denali." I could see he was starting to calm down, and I heard Bella with Jasper and Emmett trying to make peace as well.

"Does anyone have a towel or a sheet or something like that I could borrow?" In seconds Rosalie sauntered out carrying a sheet.

"Interesting look for you Leah." she smirked and I looked down to see I had on a wet pink silk robe edged with lace and ruffles.

I ignored her and I held the sheet out in front of Kyle. "I need you to change back so I can talk to you. I know it goes against what you feel you need to do, but they won't attack you. Please Kyle, I'll explain everything, just trust me."

I turned my head and waited for him to decide if he could trust them. It was almost a surprise when he put his arms around me and kissed me. He had the sheet wrapped around him toga style and I was aware that we were all getting pelted with freezing rain. The white sheet quickly became somewhat transparent and I was sure my robe wasn't much better on the decency scale.

"Leah, come up here out of the rain, and bring your friend with you." Bella was standing near Emmett and Jasper. She looked beautiful without even a hair out of place. I wondered if she ran between raindrops. I lead Kyle up onto the porch and Esme came out with a couple dry blankets for us. For once I didn't worry about the charity, but wrapped up gratefully as Kyle did the same. "You're welcome to come inside if you like. I know you don't get cold easily but it's wet and miserable out here." She retreated back inside and I took Kyle's hand and followed her in. We sat together on the couch and had many curious eyes watching us. I was suddenly embarrassed like never before with the Cullen's.

"Kyle, these are the Cullen's. As you have guessed they're all vampires. They're like the coven you observed in Denali, they don't hunt humans. Carlisle must be at the hospital; he's a respected doctor. Esme is his wife and the rest are their adopted children; Edward, his wife Bella and their child Renesmee." I was stunned at how much she'd grown in the time I was away. "I told you about her. There's Rosalie and her husband Emmett, Alice and her husband Jasper." I looked around at them all. "I'm sorry to barge in like this, but I was desperate. This is Kyle, my fiance. He's a shape shifter like I am. His favorite animal is that big grizzly bear you saw. Unfortunately there are too many alpha males in one place back home and he's been having a little bit of trouble controlling himself.

"I looked at Kyle and smiled. "I had to get you away from there as fast as possible, that's why I ran." I reached up and caressed his cheek and pushed his wet hair off of his face. "I'm sorry I couldn't explain it to you but you weren't hearing me very well." I looked at the rest of them again. "I brought him back from Alaska to meet my friends and family and we're getting married." I watched as Rosalie stepped lightly over beside us.

"You've finally done something right Leah; this one even smells good!" She leaned in toward him and took a deep breath. "Mmmm, reminds me of eating apple dumplings on the front porch swing. I'll be happy to take him off your hands if you change your mind....he might be worth breaking my diet over!" For once I could tell that she was only teasing, well _mostly _teasing. Kyle stood up so quick I didn't have time to react. He towered over Rosalie and he looked down on her with a predatory grin.

"You think so little girl? Who's to say that _I _might be the one breaking _my _diet over _you ." _In a split second Emmett was beside her.

"If you mess with her, you'll have to go through me first!" He took a small step toward Kyle. "I don't believe we have a treaty with _you_, and since you came here, I believe that makes you fair game!"

Kyle grinned and nodded. "That could be fun! As you can imagine I have such a beautiful fiance I have a lot of pent up frustration I need to work out. We'll have to see what kind of time-table we have before this wedding happens, maybe we could schedule a time for a friendly wrestling match?" I relaxed a bit seeing that they were both playing nice. I saw Bella and Edward ready to step in to break up any conflict.

"You're on!" Emmett stuck out his hand to shake on their upcoming match. "Make sure you bring the bear, and if by some chance you beat me, you can take on Bella!" They all laughed and Kyle looked at me confused.

"Didn't you once say something about Bella being weak and needing protection? What was that all about?"

"I was talking about Bella before she changed. She used to be one of the clumsiest, frailest girls you could have ever hoped to meet. The only thing she was really good at was wrapping guys around her little finger!"

"Thanks a lot Leah!" She was trying to sound indignant, but I could see her smiling.

"Well, you were pretty pathetic sometimes. I lost track of how many times you wound up in the hospital before you....changed." I looked at Kyle to see if he was following me. "You don't want to mess with her Kyle, not only is she the strongest one of them right now, but the rest of them would tear you apart if you even tried to go after her."

"Leah, are you going to tell me why we're here? I mean if they could 'tear us apart,' what's the point of being here....no offense." He nodded to those listening. Why don't we just go back and spend time with your family and friends? They all came out to see you, and then you disappeared." He had me in his arms and I was aware there wasn't much between us. His blanket had slipped and was mostly around his waist and he'd gotten rid of the wet sheet.

"Kyle, I need to wait until Jacob and Sam aren't around before you go back. There's some kind of alpha male challenge you're experiencing and I don't trust you not to attack one or both of them."

"Why would I attack Jacob? Wasn't I fine when he picked us up?"

"You both did that crushing handshake thing! I don't call that fine! And let's not forget the way you....we behaved in my room. I mean most people would be a little intimidated coming on so strong to their fiance in a house with all of her family and friends gathered, but not you! If Jacob hadn't interrupted I don't know what would have happened!"

"Bet I could guess." I heard Emmett whisper and Rosalie elbowed him in the ribs

"You snarled at Jacob! I could feel you were about to change right then and there. Do you remember me taking your shoes off? I wanted to make sure you didn't ruin them." He looked down at his bare feet and back up at me.

"I don't remember any of that! All I remember is you introduced me to Emily and Sam....and then I was trying to catch you! Leah, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to act like that!" He sat back down and I sat next to him again.

Esme drifted over to us and I hadn't even realized she'd left. She had a pile of clothes in her hands. "These won't fit you, but they're as close as I could come to your sizes. You're both taller than any of us, but maybe you'd feel more comfortable in something that won't fall off." For the first time I saw the genuine concern on her pretty face and I thanked her for the clothes, even though they had their particular odor on them. "If you want you can call home and see if your guests are still there. I'm sure you could borrow one of our cars and drive back as soon as Sam and Jacob have gone; that should keep you out of the rain. You shouldn't take too long since it's supposed to freeze as soon as the sun sets. It's been very nice to meet you Kyle."

We changed clothes and Kyle was obviously wearing some of Emmett's old clothes and the pants were several inches too short and the knit shirt was stretched tight across his chest. I think I had something that was either Rosalie's or Esme's and the skirt and sweater wasn't such a bad fit if you didn't know the skirt was supposed to be longer. I pushed the sleeves up to my elbows so they didn't look so short. We didn't bother trying to find shoes that fit since I'd been through this challenge before, and Kyle obviously had to special order his shoes. "Thank you Esme, I really do appreciate this!"

When I called home Mom was almost frantic with worry, thinking that I'd run off again. I spent several minutes apologizing and I lied and told her Kyle had gotten violently ill and wanted to get away from all the guests in case he was contagious. I said I didn't think he was but it was likely something bad he'd eaten on our trip. She was even more concerned when she found out we were at the Cullen's, but I explained that I thought that Dr. Cullen would be able to help us out easier than going to the hospital. I asked if the party was still going on, and who was still there. I breathed a sigh of relief when she said that most of the people had gone home including Sam and Emily. "I'm proud of the way you welcomed them and mended fences, Leah. I didn't know if I should invite them or not, but it would have been hard not to since everyone else was there. Is Kyle well enough to come back? Seth has given up his room for him until the wedding. Now I know you've been alone with him for all this time, but just humor your mother and let me at least keep you two sleeping separate until you're married." I had to laugh.

"Mom that's fine, I'm very happy with those arrangements; I thought you'd have a room for him somewhere in Forks to maximize the distance. And just for the record I don't have to humor you; we haven't been....I'm still.....Awe Mom, I still qualify for the white dress, okay?"

"Leah, when are you coming back? We have a lot to talk about, and I don't think you had a chance to eat anything ….I've got all this food! I can't wait to discuss your wedding plans....I'm so excited!"

"We'll be coming back very soon. I love you mom!" I hung up the phone and let everyone know that we could go back. "Bella, I'm sorry about your robe; I appreciate everything you've done for us." Esme provided us with a large umbrella and Emmett took a key from a hook in the kitchen and gave it to Kyle. "There's a pickup in the garage. Keep it as long as you need it, and when you bring it back we can have our match up!"

The Cullen garage was huge, and I think even Kyle was impressed with the number and expense of the cars hidden behind it's darkened doors. The pickup truck was one of the humbler vehicles, but I was glad they hadn't given us the keys to a sports car or one of their luxurious sedans. The truck would look almost acceptable at home, though it was new with shiny chrome and big tires. It was also likely the best choice for freezing rain and icy roads.

I didn't even think of driving even though I probably knew the roads better than Kyle. I knew he had more experience driving on ice; both because of where he lived and because he simply had more years of experience in most things, that was always going to be true of us. He expertly drove us back to my home, taking the roads slow and careful. The ice was glistening on the branches of the trees already and I knew we would likely lose power as soon as the weight of the ice began to break the branches and weigh down the power lines. I had him park at the side of the house, so we could slip in through the back door. I found my shoes and brought his to him quickly before anyone knew we were back. My bag was in my room, and I imagined Kyles was in Seth's room.

I pointed him to the door so he could change into his own clothes before we went to speak with my family. I was planning on doing the same when my mom caught me in the hall. "Leah! I didn't even hear you come in. I'm so glad you made it back, almost everyone has gone home since the roads were getting so bad. Is Kyle here? I've barely had a chance to meet him in all the chaos. I can't wait to get to know my future son-in-law, is he okay now?" She looked a little worried and stressed out from all the activity.

"Come on Mom, let's go have a seat and wait for him. He's changing clothes right now, then I'll get us both something to eat and you two can talk, okay? I also think it would be a good idea to get the fireplaces lit and some candles out, the ice on the trees tells me the power will probably be out before morning." I guided her to our living room and sat with her on the couch as Seth had already started building the fires in our two fireplaces. He sniffed at my clothes as he walked by me but didn't say anything.

When Kyle came out he was dressed in a pair of jeans and a button up shirt. He had to duck as he came through the doorway and I stood up in a hurry and went to him. "Mom, Seth, this is Kyle....." I locked down, suddenly drawing a blank where his last name should be! I know he'd told me, I know I didn't miss such a critical detail in all the time I'd known him, but I couldn't come up with it and I didn't remember ever using it in the short time I'd known him.

"It's Sangilak Leah., or at least that's what it will be as soon as I file the papers." He smiled down at me. "It's very good to finally meet you both, I'm very sorry that I caused so much confusion earlier, I have no idea what kind of poison got into me! I'm just glad Leah knew what to do about it." He'd taken my hand in his left, and shook hands with Seth and Mom with his right, the perfect gentleman. He sat next to me on the couch and Seth sat on the hearth warming himself by the fire and Mom was on the other end of the couch.

"I think I've thrown several names at Leah, but I never claimed any of them was really my last name. The sad truth is that where I was born our Inuit names have only recently been acknowledged by any government agency. I had to do a bit of research to find a name in my family tree that I wanted to claim as a last name. Inuit don't have surnames traditionally, and in the eighteen hundreds when our people were encountered by European explorers and missionaries they actually gave many of the people numbers to wear on wooden dog tags around their necks to identify them. Some of the oldest villagers still have their numbers from childhood. When missionaries came through to spread Christianity many took to naming their children European names, like my family. But still unless there was a reason to have official paperwork filed there were no surnames. I've always been just Kyle to my family." He smiled at me

"I'd actually told Leah that my name was Keelut, since some of my village had started calling me by that old Inuit name. It means 'evil earth spirit with the appearance of a dog' and after some of my first changes I thought it fit me almost too perfectly." Seth had started to laugh at that and I watched Mom to see how she would take it that Kyle was a shape shifter. It didn't seem to surprise her and I remembered that Jacob knew and must have told her. "I've also had another name when I was working on the pipeline in the seventies. Since I needed to collect a paycheck and pay taxes They wanted a name. I had to request a social security number and I just used the name Smith since it was so common I didn't think it mattered. I've also got my pilot's license under the name Smith and a couple other legal records." He smiled and squeezed my hand.

"The thing is, I don't want to carry that name since it never mattered to me, and now it's possible to legally have our names changed to Inuit names. I'm going to have my name legally changed to Taqukaq Sangilak in all my legal documents." He watched for my reaction and smiled. "Don't worry, Leah, I'll still be Kyle, I've finally started to like the name now that I hear you say it. I might even add it as a middle name. I think that the meaning of my chosen name is more appropriate than Keelut, and I hope you won't mind taking it as your own. Or you could keep Clearwater if you prefer. It's not that important to me what you want to be called as long as you're my wife."

I was a little surprised and I could tell Mom was hanging on every word as he described aspects of his Inuit culture. "Kyle, what does the name mean? Are you going to tell me why you chose it?"I asked.

He smiled like he had been waiting for that question. "Taquikaq would be my first name, and it means grizzly bear. Sangilak would be my new surname and it translates to 'strongest of all.'" I could see he was proud of his choice and I smiled with him.

"Grizzly Bear?" Seth interrupted. "Why would you want to call yourself Grizzly Bear when that Dogface name sounds better to me? Well except for the part about being evil.....maybe Leah should take that name!"

I didn't let Seth's picking get to me. "I think it's perfect, Kyle! Do you think I should choose a new name too?" I could feel Mom's disapproval at the thought that I might change the name she and Dad had given me.

"That would be up to you, but you'll always be my Leah no matter what the papers say. I wouldn't be worrying about all this name changing stuff except for one reason. Inuit have a strange way of looking at names. We are named or even renamed based on many different circumstances. Some children are called one name at birth and then if a close relative dies their name could be changed to honor that relative in hopes that the child will become like them. The names have meaning behind them and because so many are named after other relatives it drove the Europeans crazy trying to keep it all straight. Now that those names can be reclaimed legally it opens the door for more craziness; especially when you add in social security numbers and a population mostly born outside of a hospital. So where someone might notice that Kyle Smith has lived to be fifty years old but doesn't look a day over twenty-five. It could be passed off as a crazy Inuit naming issue if it's Taqukaq Sangilak. When the names and numbers don't add up, most people will go along with what makes most sense to them; that I've had a son and given him my exact name. And if there's only one Taqukaq Sangilak walking around they won't even worry about what happened to the senior since deaths are rarely reported among my people." He smiled at me and I was thinking about how his niece and nephew already thought of him as their uncle Kyle's son.

"It should work so long as I never ask the government for any kind of benefit or legal consideration. Kyle Smith has already received the one and only concession I'll ever need from the government, and that's legal ownership of a heavenly slice of pristine beach front property that I was able to trace back to my great grandfather." He shrugged his shoulders as he finished his explanation.

"Kyle, just how old are you?" I turned and saw my mom looking at him, and my heart started to hammer in my chest. This was not something I wanted to come out so soon. I was hoping they would fall in love with him and welcome him before that bombshell dropped.

He leaned forward, looking past me to my mother. "Let's see, on July seventeenth I'll be celebrating my next birthday. I'll be fifty-one." He didn't pull any punches and I watched the news hit her like a weight. I heard Seth yelp as he fell back against the fireplace grate and burned his arm. All I could do was squeeze his hand as she thought over what he'd said.

"Leah, he's older than me! He's older than your father would have been! Only by a couple months, but still....fifty-one! How is that possible?!"

"I noticed I stopped aging when I started changing. I was twenty-five the first time and physically I've been twenty-five ever since. And all that time I thought I was the only one like me; until I met Leah! I've been in love with her since before I saw her, and I know I've been waiting all this time just for her!

She looked from him, to me, then over to Seth, still so young. "I wish your father were still here; maybe he could help me with all this!" She collapsed back against the couch and I was beginning to worry about her.

"Seth, would you get Mom something to drink, please." He was eager to leave our serious conversation as he hurried to the kitchen. Kyle got up and slipped past me whispering that he'd be right back. "Mom, please don't worry. I know this is a lot to handle, but I really do love him, and he loves me." I could see she didn't want to think too hard about all of our pack members staying young for such a long time. "Mom, what can I say to make you feel better about him? Is it just his age?"

"Leah, there's just so much you don't know! He's a whole generation older than you....he's lived a whole lifetime before you were even born! He will see things in a totally different way than you will, he'll seem old-fashioned to you, he'll have goals and dreams that will be hard for you to understand, and he might have trouble with letting you go through your own learning process. I don't want you to rush through your youth trying to catch up to him! I want you to grow into who you are meant to be, not his idea of who you should be!" I could see her problem wasn't with Kyle, but with any man who was more than twice my age.

"Mom, I want you to be happy for me. I know I still have some growing up to do and you're worried. But so much of growing up is about trying to find what makes you happy, and I've already found that!" Kyle came back and handed her a large cardboard tube just as Seth came back with a tall glass of water.

"I knew you would have a problem with my age; what parent in their right mind wouldn't. All I can do is promise to love everything about her, but even that's a small comfort. I can tell you there has not been anyone in my life but Leah; no old girlfriends or ex-wives. I dated before I changed, but there was never anyone serious, and I didn't date after I discovered I was different." He pointed to the tube. "I painted that about twenty years ago, and I've pieced together all the dates and figure Leah was a week old when I finished. I wanted to have it framed for you, but there hasn't been time.

I didn't know he'd brought his painting of me until Mom pulled it out of the tube and spread it out to look at it. I heard her gasp and Seth was the first one to speak. "Leah, that almost looks just like you!"

"Mrs. Clearwater, I love your daughter, and I've been waiting a long time for her. Not only does she make me happy, she makes me feel like I have a reason for existing. You have a lot of good reasons to be worried, but together we'll face those challenges just like any other couple. I'll do everything in my power to keep her safe and make her happy."

"I came home to get married, Mom. If you don't feel right helping us with a wedding; I'm still going to marry him, I just wanted you to be happy for me. She sat and looked from me to Kyle and back again. Then she looked down at the painting and I watched tears come to her eyes.

"I still wish your father was here!" She looked at me and the tears trickled down her cheeks. "I wish he could be here to see our baby girl get married!" She threw her arms around me and I found myself crying too. Kyle stood by helplessly watching us until Seth rescued him.

"Come on big guy, let's go bring in some firewood while we can still get out of here. You don't want to be around when they start picking out napkin colors and making seating arrangements! I'd rather face the ice storm than that!" Kyle kissed my cheek before he left.

Seth was right, we had a lot of planning to do even though Mom had most of it already done. She planned our wedding for Valentine's Day, which was only a week and a half away I was surprised to learn. She had planned an outdoor wedding with an indoor back-up plan if the weather turned foul. She had me crying again when she told me she took her own wedding gown out of storage and had it cleaned and ready to be altered for me. "It might be too old-fashioned for you, but I'm sure Kyle will like it." she joked. "It's up to you if you want to wear my old gown, or we can shop in a hurry for something else; you're choice."

"I'd love to wear yours, I mean if it fits me." I looked at the differences between us and wondered.

"Well Leah, you can have it altered or changed any way you want to suit you. If it has too much lace you can rework it. I've got several friends who sew and they've agreed to help me get it ready for you." It was full steam ahead with wedding plans and preparations and we talked for hours while Seth kept Kyle busy. Occasionally he would pop in to check on me or answer a question, but mostly he was fine to let us worry about the details. There were a few times when Mom wanted to do something extravagant, but I reined her in. I wanted the whole thing to be simple and meaningful, and in no way competing with what Sam and Emily had done.

I thought we would be up all night, but just like I'd predicted the power flickered and went off. "Well, Sweetheart, that's my signal to get to bed. I've had a very long day and I'm about wiped out! You know where everything is, and don't forget to get yourselves something to eat. The refrigerator is on the generator and there are plenty of leftovers. We need to get rid of everything so we have room for wedding food." She kissed my cheek and used a flashlight to make her way back to her bedroom. As soon as she left Kyle joined me on the couch and Seth flopped into a chair after adding more wood to the crackling fire.


	6. Chapter 6 Changes

Chapter 6

Changes

"So, do I get to know about the wedding plans?" Kyle asked as he put his arm around me and pulled me close. Seth groaned. "Or is this one of those things where you just need to tell me where and when to show up?"

"How much do you really want to know?" I asked. "I mean Mom's working hard to have us married on Valentine's Day, and I can tell you it will be outside unless the weather gets nasty"

"That's a pretty short time-table! I'm so glad we won't have to wait very long." He kissed my cheek "I never even thought about it, but shouldn't we go look at rings sometime soon?"

"Um....you might want to rethink that idea of rings," Seth interrupted, reminding us that we were not alone in the room. "Sam won't wear his ring, and he made everyone in the pack stop wearing jewelry since it was possible to cause damage during a change. Remember Leah, when you had to stop wearing that necklace he gave you....oops, I'm sorry I shouldn't have said that!"

"It's okay Seth, Kyle knows all about it, and I'm all over it now. I'm glad you reminded me." A log popped loudly in the fireplace and I heard my stomach growl. "Anyone else hungry?" I asked as I stood to go to the kitchen.

Kyle stood with me, keeping his arm around my waist. "We've been snacking all evening while you and your mom were in here making plans. But I'm sure we could eat a little more if you forced us, I mean she did say it all had to go!"

We all went to the kitchen and by flashlight and candle flame we made sandwiches and ate leftover party food standing around the kitchen table. The pebbly tapping of the sleet hitting the tin roof was almost enough to cover our talking and joking as we ate. I could tell Seth approved of Kyle even though he kept teasing both of us at every opportunity. "You never did say why you want to name yourself after a grizzly bear. Isn't that kind of weird?" Seth barely looked at Kyle while stuffing another handful of chips into his mouth and washing them down with punch.

"Well, I think Leah wants to wait and share the secret at a better time, when more of you are around, but if you don't tell anyone I'll let you in on it early. Can you keep it to yourself?" Kyle spoke to Seth almost like a son and it reminded me of their age difference.

"Well, so long as I don't need to join the pack I can keep a secret. But you know once I change I'm an open book! It's the same with Leah too. But I think we're safe enough now with everyone home keeping warm and dry." I wanted to caution Kyle, but then I thought that my big planned revelation might not happen since Kyle was having so much trouble staying calm around Jacob and Sam.

"Okay Seth, the reason I chose to be named Grizzly Bear is because when I change that's what I like to become!" It was priceless to see Seth struck speechless. His jaw dropped open and he lost the olive he was trying to pop in his mouth. "I change into the grizzly bear when I hunt, but I can also become a fox, or an eagle, an owl, an otter, and of course with Leah around I can't forget the wolf!" He smiled at Seth's disbelief. "Oh, and I can also become the scariest sled dog you've ever seen!"

Kyle looked at me and grinned. "If you think that's impressive, Leah can do it better than I can! I thought it was going to take her a long time to learn, but she is so smart and she can already change into as many animals as I can!"

Seth finally spoke. "Now I know you're lying! Leah changes into a gray wolf; we've all seen her! Why do you want to play that kind of game with me? I'm even giving you my room!" I could tell he wanted to brush off what Kyle was saying as a joke, but part of him was believing it.

Kyle laughed along with Seth. "I think you know I'm telling the truth. I've seen Leah as a wolf often enough to know she's a lovely gray with darker fur down her back. And beautiful golden eyes! She's also a pretty little silver fox when she wants to be, and I've seen her golden eagle. But I can't prove to you that I can change into a grizzly bear, not now anyway. I can change into a fox or a bald eagle pretty safely in the house." Kyle was asking Seth to go along with it. "If I show you, you can't overreact, okay?"

"Yeah, sure....just how gullible do I look to you?" Kyle didn't argue, but I could see Seth was interested when Kyle took off his shirt, shoes and socks and unsnapped his jeans. He pulled a chair to a clear area of the room and I felt the heat when he changed. The huge bald eagle seemed even bigger in the small space, and I watched him hop from the chair seat to the back, grabbing onto it with strong talons and spreading his wings not even their full span before the tips of one brushed against a window. Seth silently came around the table. "Leah, is that Kyle or have I gone crazy?" The bird ducked his head twice in what looked like a nod. "Is it okay to touch it? Will he bite me?"

"That's Kyle Seth, as long as he's not angry or stressed out he's as safe as he was a minute ago! You know, just like when you are a wolf you are still you!" The bird watched him with his quick- blinking observant eyes and Seth reached out to touch his head. Just as his fingers got close, Kyle snapped at him with his powerful beak and Seth yelped and jumped back. "Kyle!" I scolded. "Seth, he's just messing with you! He won't bite you, and even if he did you'd heal so fast it wouldn't matter. I'll show you he's Kyle."

I stepped over and picked up his discarded jeans. When I sat in the chair the eagle spread it's wings behind me. Without looking I reached up and pet the bird's head, being careful not to rearrange any feathers. I put my finger against his beak, feeling the sharp point but I didn't get bit. When Kyle hopped onto my shoulder I felt he was careful not to claw me, but it would have been easy to shred my shoulder. "See, it's Kyle; he wouldn't do anything to hurt me." I reached out for Seth's hand and held his arm steady like a perch. When the eagle left my shoulder and landed on Seth's arm I had to hold his hand tight since he was afraid of being attacked. "If he were a wild eagle he would have drawn blood when he landed. He's trying not to hurt you Seth." I let go of his hand and Seth held steady, amazed to have the enormous bird of prey sitting placidly on his arm. "You should see him when he flies, he's breathtaking!" I watched Seth smooth the birds feathers with his other hand and I remembered how it really was Kyle, and that Seth was petting my fiance, not just any bird.

"Does that convince you enough that Kyle was telling you the truth?" I held my arm out and Kyle changed perches, and I transferred him back to the back of the chair. "I'm going to go to the bathroom while he changes back." I set his pants where he'd left them and made my exit. When I came back out Kyle was himself again and fully dressed. "So little brother does that answer your question?"

"I get that Kyle can become something other than a wolf, but what about you? I mean if you can do it, maybe I can do it too!" I grinned. This was almost better than show and tell day at school when you had something really good to take.

"I can show you what I look like as a fox. Will that convince you?" At his nod I backed up. In seconds I was changed, and I had to wiggle out of my useless clothes. I hopped up onto Kyle's lap and licked his face. He wrapped his arms protectively around me and once again Seth had to touch me to see if I was real.

"Leah, is that really you? I can hardly believe it!" I yipped softly and jumped down off of Kyle's lap. I wove through Seth's legs twice and grabbed my clothes in my teeth and headed to my bedroom. When I was changed back and dressed I was anxious to get back to Kyle. I heard him explaining his lesson on changing to Seth. I smiled as I remembered how he'd taught me to study an animal, not to just copy it, but to become the animal. I sat down on Kyles lap as Seth hung on his every word. "Leah, Kyle's been telling me how he thinks I can lean how to do what you both do! Do you really think the whole pack will be able to do this too?"

"I think you can all learn it; I think it's part of what we are. But I also wonder why we have developed an affinity for the wolf; maybe it's the reason we've survived for so long. Not many other predators have a pack mentality; most are solitary or live in pairs. I'd hate to introduce everyone to all the choices and possibilities only to have the packs split up and everyone go off on their own and stop working together as a team." I could see that both Seth and Kyle were thinking about what I'd said.

"Do you think there could be more of us scattered around the world? It would certainly seem possible considering that I'm not a part of your tribe and yet we clearly are alike." Kyle had his arms around me and Seth was watching us from across the table.

"Maybe that would explain where Embry came from!" Seth looked like he was happy to have a reason for Embry's questionable parenthood. It had secretly been believed that with all of our pack being able to trace their lineage back to one of three recent tribal leaders, except for Embry, that one of the fathers had cheated with his mother. I myself would rather think it had been someone else, but there was not an easy way to prove how he'd come by his ability. "Your father never came down this way before he met your mother, did he Kyle?"

Kyle laughed at the question. "Seth, my father would have been close to seventy years old when your friend's mother got pregnant. You'd be looking for someone closer to _my_ age if you want to track him down; and I can tell you without a doubt _I'm _not his father! Although I do have two brothers who left the area, and I haven't heard from them in quite a while. I'll have to look into it some day. The sound of the ice hitting the roof slowed down to a light ticking and I got up to clean up the food. Seth went to check the generator and then added more wood to the fireplaces.

Kyle went back to the living room to sit by the fire and I caught Seth coming in the back door with another armful of wood. I tried to keep my voice down as I talked with him. "I need a favor from you." I tried not to look guilty as I helped him stack the wood in place. "If you know Jacob or Sam will be coming by, will you give me a warning?" Seth looked confused and I tried to give a quick explanation. "Remember when Jacob split from the pack and became his own alpha? Well, Kyle has been his own alpha for a lot longer than Sam or Jacob, and he's never been part of a pack. He's never yielded leadership to anyone before and I don't think he intends to start now. Kyle's just not himself when those two are around, and I want a chance to get him out of the way if they are going to be nearby. It's hard to explain because Kyle has claimed me as his, but I'm still connected to Jacob as part of the pack, and to Sam because of our history.

"I've seen Kyle as a grizzly, and I don't believe either Sam or Jacob could stand against him for long. And if their pack leaders were in trouble you know the rest would join in; it would put a whole lot of people I love and care about at risk and I'm going to try to avoid that at all costs."

"So, are you really over Sam? It seems like he's had some part in your life for such a long time it's hard to believe you've finally let go." He wasn't being a bratty little brother, but a concerned friend and I smiled to realize how far we'd come.

"I'm so over Sam it's as if he never mattered in the first place! I had to see the real thing to recognize how wrong I was."

"So, did you imprint on him Leah, it sure looks like it to me." I was laughing before he finished his question.

"No Seth, it didn't happen that way for me....but it did for him! He didn't know what hit him, poor guy! It's scary to have someone so fixated on you. But it's hard to say 'no' to that kind of love and devotion; and it helps that he's such a wonderful man! That's why I want to keep him away from Sam and Jacob; he's not so wonderful when they're around."

"Is that what happened today? You're not a very convincing liar; I'm sure Mom would have noticed it if she wasn't so stressed out. I think she wanted to believe it too, but I've seen him eat and he sure didn't look sick to me!"

"Thanks for not spilling the beans to Mom. What happened while I was gone? You used to be such a brat – now you're behaving like you're growing up." I smiled and ruffled his fuzzy haircut.

"Gee thanks....I think." I noticed also that he'd grown a couple inches while I was away and now he was taller than I was. "You've missed a lot. I've been the pack beta while you were gone. And you also missed my seventeenth birthday last month! Don't worry, I don't expect you to get me anything....I'll accept cash!" He was laughing playfully when Kyle came to see what we were up to.

"I was starting to wonder where you were. Do you need any more help with the firewood?" He slipped his arm around me like a natural reflex. "I think the sleet has stopped falling so maybe the power outages won't be so bad. I need to call my sister and let her know when the wedding is going to be. I can make arrangements to go back and pick them up, but I'll have to see if someone in my flying club will be able to take them home afterward; I'm going to be too preoccupied to worry about taking them back home." He squeezed me and Seth laughed. I was glad the light was too dim for them to see me blush.

"So do you have any other family and friends coming?" Seth asked. "Leah said you were the youngest of seven, are we going to need to find places for everyone to stay?"

"Uh, no. Most of them don't understand why I don't age. I'm sure my sister will let everyone know, but I don't expect them to want to be here. My mom thinks I'm my own son, she came up with that explanation all on her own and I haven't had the heart to tell her any different. I've also lost touch with most of my friends; once I started changing I started to worry that someone would find out by accident, or that I might hurt someone if they made me angry."

Seth looked visibly shaken by his explanations. I had already heard most of it before, but it still made me sad for what he'd gone through for so long. "It sounds a little like what Sam went through at first. Except he didn't have to wait so long to find others like him." Seth was trying to empathize with Kyle. "I'm so glad I had someone there to tell me what was happening; I can't imagine going through this alone!" He patted Kyle's shoulder and then yawned.

Kyle smiled, "why don't you go ahead and go to bed and we can talk more tomorrow."

"I'm not tired, I stay up late all the time!" Seth tried to appear energized, but the dark circles under his eyes told a different story. I wondered how much extra work Mom had made him do to get ready for my return.

"Seth, you're not going to miss anything, we're going to bed soon too." I lead the way back through the house.

"I can't go to sleep as long as you two are up; the couch is my bed until you're married. I think Mom wanted me to chaperone you two and keep you in separate rooms." He looked embarrassed and Kyle and I both laughed.

"Get some sleep Seth. We've been chaperoning ourselves since we met. You don't have to worry, my virtue is safe." I tried not to laugh at Kyle's raised eyebrow.

"Yeah, but what about _my _virtue?" Seth looked embarrassed and Kyle went on, "You really need to keep an eye on her! She'll try to sneak into my room and do terrible things to me! Just before we left to come here she attacked and _bit _me! You don't believe me? Just ask her, she's proud of it!"

"Kyle!" I punched his arm hard, knowing I couldn't damage his rock solid body.

"See, she's meaner than a snake! Now she's hitting me even while you're here watching! I don't know how you survived growing up with such a menace. But I'll make you a deal; I'll take her to her room and I'll stay up all night keeping an eye on her so she can't cause either one of us any harm. I'll even hold her down if that's what it takes to keep us all safe; whaddya say?" He couldn't keep the grin off his face, and I was giggling as Seth rolled his eyes at both of us.

Seth threw up his hands, "Just go to bed you two; _separate _beds! I'm not worried about you two; I'm worried about Mom. I'd rather face a wolf _and_ a bear than an angry Mom!"

We said our good nights and headed off to bed after blowing out the candles. I kissed Kyle goodnight in the hallway and I reluctantly left him to go sleep alone in my room.

In the morning I woke up alone in my own bed and for just a second I thought that everything about Kyle had been a dream. I even missed his scent as I stretched and crawled from the warm nest of blankets. A small teddy bear fell off the bed and I was jolted by the memory that Sam had given it to me years ago and I'd slept with it up until the day I left home. I heard a light tap on my door just before the most beautiful man I'd ever seen ducked his head as he came through the door frame. "Are you going to sleep the whole day away Tikaani?" He left the door open and sat on the edge of my bed. I all but launched myself at him, wrapping my arms around him and covering his cheeks with kisses.

"I've missed you so much Kyle! I'm so lucky to have you; let's get married!" I climbed onto his lap facing him, wrapped my arms and legs around him, and kissed him enthusiastically.

For several heartbeats he returned my kisses, both of us carried away by our mutual desire. But then he broke away and started trying to dislodge me from his lap. "Are you trying to get me killed? There's a man in the other room with a gun and a badge. And I don't think even _he _would be able to keep your mom from taking my head off if she caught us like this!" He laughed as I slipped off of his lap.

Chief Swan must be visiting, which still struck me as odd since he'd been one of my dad's best friends, and now he was spending so much time with my mom. Before I left it was one of the things that I'd been mad at the world about. I could link it all back to the Cullen family; how they shouldn't be here, and we wouldn't have become what we were, and Sam wouldn't have left me, and Dad wouldn't have died. But now I could see if that first domino hadn't fallen, I never would have found Kyle; worse, I might be married to Sam. I was starting to realize that I couldn't blame the Cullen's for everything wrong with my life. They weren't the reason Dad had died, in fact they weren't even in the country at the time. I guess I'd started to think like several people in the tribe, that me and Seth turning into wolves had been too much stress for him.

But when I looked around it seemed we were all doing just fine. The younger wolves were proud to be guardians of the tribe. The two packs had sorted out their differences, and even Sam and Emily were finally getting on with their lives. I compared our tribe to what was happening in Kyle's village and it seemed that our changes had united us and kept us from falling into some of the same traps. Our young people weren't running off to find a better life somewhere else. We didn't have a big problem with alcoholism, and our council was still strong in leadership. Sure money was tight, but it was the same in the whole area. Life was simple here, but it was still good.

I kissed Kyle and shooed him out of my room so I could change. It was good to have my own clothes again, but they seemed like they belonged to someone else. I remembered wanting so much to look feminine and pretty, especially after I changed and had to run with the guys. My wardrobe seemed to be screaming 'look at me!' and I had to dig to find something I wanted to wear now. I wanted to throw away everything pink and sexy, but I only needed to worry about it for a little while longer. I knew that sometime this week I'd be doing some shopping with Mom and I planned to find some better clothes then. In the mean time I picked out something that was pretty and feminine without being overly revealing. I slipped down the hall to the empty bathroom. I forgot the power was off, and the water in the shower was ice cold. Fortunately I could handle it, but I rushed through and dressed in a hurry.

When I came out Chief Swan was standing in the living room, and Sam was lurking in the doorway. "Leah! I was hoping I'd get to see you while you were home." Charley hugged me warmly and noticed my cold wet hair. "My Alaska must have given you some serious cold resistance if you can take showers without hot water!" He smiled as Kyle came to stand beside me. "I just came by to tell your mother that the power was out over most of the county due to the ice storm. Sam's getting a group of men together to go out to check on the people most at risk, you know the elderly, the handicapped, people with infants, and those who are too remote to be reached easily. Fortunately the weather should warm up in a day or two, but right now it's a mess out there.

"I've been calling some of the ladies who live nearby and we're getting together to make lunches and care packages to send along. I can get rid of some of that extra food from yesterday." Mom was happy to pitch in and help.

Seth popped up and asked, "Can Kyle and I help out? I can show him where people live and I'm sure he knows how to drive on ice after living in Alaska!"

"Seth, we had to be picked up from the airport remember, we're without a car right now." I reminded him.

"What about the truck you borrowed yesterday? That thing's incredible; I'll call the Cullen's and ask if it's okay to use it a little longer, I'm sure they won't mind." He took off to make the call oblivious to the chilly reaction his suggestion had gotten. At the mention of the Cullen name everyone in the room started to get a little irritated. It was only recent that the tribe had come to accept them, but still their name brought to mind differences that were hard for some to deal with. Kyle looked down at me and smiled, "I'd like to help out if I can. I'm sure Seth knows his way around and I can drive through almost anything.

"That's kind of you to offer. We've got all the emergency personnel in town stretched thin trying to clear the roads and get the power back on. I'm sure we could keep you busy if you don't mind being away from your pretty fiance!" Chief Swan smiled at us both.

"She is beautiful, but she knows _I'll _always come back to her!" He wrapped his arms around me from behind and smiled over my shoulder at Chief Swan and Sam at the same time. His hold was starting to get uncomfortably tight and I was hoping that Sam would leave soon and their paths would be in opposite directions. I could feel him getting warmer by the minute and I was grateful when Seth came bounding back into the room.

"The Cullen's said it was fine to use the truck. And Emmett wants to know when you're going to have that wrestling match? What's that all about? You can't be serious about wrestling him, he's...." His eyes traveled up to Kyle's seven foot height and he chuckled, "....huge!"

"Alright Seth, we need to get started. I've got a list of people you two can go check on." Sam handed Seth a list of names. "Do you know everyone on that list and where they live?" Seth read down the list and nodded. "Then we'll keep in touch with cell phones. If anyone is in immediate trouble let us know so we can get them help."

"I know how to handle trouble. I've worked as a park ranger for years and did search and rescue as well, we'll be fine." Kyle sounded self assured, but I could hear the edge to his voice and I held tight to his arms wrapped around me. About that time Mom came out of the kitchen and handed everyone a large sack.

"I've packed food for your teams and there's some things for the people on your list; candles, matches, and batteries for the flashlights. Oh, just a minute." She ran off to her bedroom and returned with an armload of handmade blankets. "You can give these to anyone who might need them, or use them yourself if you need to. Just be careful out there everyone!" The look she gave Chief Swan seemed to say 'especially you,' but maybe I was just being sensitive. He squeezed her shoulder and put his hat back on as he went to the door. Sam was following close behind and I was thankful to see him leaving before Kyle lost his cool in more ways than one.

It took a few more minutes for Seth and Kyle to get ready, layering on warm clothes and putting on boots. Kyle's phone was charged, and I knew the truck had a radio for emergencies as well. Before he left he kissed me so long and hard it embarrassed my mom and Seth. "You need to get out there and cool off! And remember to keep yourself under control....those are your only boots remember" I whispered so Mom wouldn't hear me. "And be careful, I love you!"

I watched him drive away and realized this was the first time we'd be apart from each other for more than a couple hours since we'd met. Well, except for when I went off to become a new animal. It didn't take Mom long to organize the nearby ladies into a little work force. They gathered at our house and brought whatever they had. We made soups and sandwiches, and packaged up candles, matches, and batteries. We also made packages for children and babies for those who might need formula and diapers. As the crews came back along the main road we were able to hand out the supplies along with coffee or hot chocolate for the workers.

After a few hours of working There was a knock at the door. Jacob came in cold and breathless. "Leah, is Seth here, we need to get the pack together for a search; Kim's grandmother wandered off, and they haven't got a clue where to find her. She's having memory issues and they didn't have any idea she was missing until this morning. Jared's tried to find her trail, but he lost it at the edge of the woods. Sam's pack is all scattered trying to check up on people and we need help _now_!

"I'll go with you, but Seth left a while ago with Kyle. We don't have time to wait, let's get going! I hurried to my room to change. I put on something sexy and revealing and kicked off my shoes. We both slipped out the back door and headed for the trees.

"Nice outfit, I bet Kyle hasn't seen you in that!" Jacob pointed at the spaghetti strapped purple backless scrap I had on along with the very short low riding skirt.

"No, and he never will!" I changed into a wolf and the clothes shredded into a fluttering pile of scraps. A russet blur of fur ran past me as Jacob changed and took the lead. It felt strange to have them back in my head as I ran along. He called out to Quil, Embry and Jared that we were on the way and we'd be splitting up to search the woods as a grid. Jared was frantic since Kim was his mate. He was sending thoughts of how upset she was and how it was hurting him to see her pain. We found the house and started from there, With noses to the ground we caught her scent easily, but at the woods the multitude of broken pine boughs had brought down too much debris and covered the trail. From that point we spread out, each of us taking a different section of the woods. The whole time I wandered back and forth in my section of grid I could hear Jared in the background counting the hours the old woman had been missing and fretting over how Kim would handle it if she died. He was desperate not to let her down and yet he was convinced that she'd gone off to die somewhere.

It seemed hopeless to me as I couldn't see even my own footprints let alone those that were hours older. And the scent was just gone. I even sniffed for something dead, but still nothing. "Jacob, let me try something else; we're not getting anywhere like this."

"What do you want to try Leah?" he continued searching barely paying me any attention as he coordinated the others to move to the next grid.

"I'm taking the search to the air." I would have felt a bigger sense of triumph but the circumstances were dire and I wasn't really interested in showing off, I just wanted to find her before it was too late. I concentrated and in seconds I was the eagle. I flew up into the sky and I knew right away that Jacob could see through my eyes and he didn't know what I was doing. I flew back to the place where we'd lost the trail and started there flying in ever widening concentric circles and looking below for anything that was out of place. When I flew over the wolves below me I saw them stop for a second and look up, There were no words, just an ah ha moment. I caught an updraft and I resisted the temptation to follow the air currents, instead widening the circle.

A movement caught my eye and I flew toward it. It wasn't in the woods, but a cleared field to the north of the house. It was a scrap of pink and with my eyes I could see it was a slipper with the pink fur blowing in the breeze. "This way guys; she's not in the woods, she must have doubled back on you! I flew low and circled the slipper until the wolves all came out to catch the new trail. They tore off toward a grouping of old barns and outbuildings with a strong scent. The closest barn was little more than a skeleton framework and they searched it but she wasn't inside.

They ran on and I flew ahead to the next one. It was a small shed and the wolves scented her inside. I flew down and landed on the roof as Jacob changed and slipped into the shorts he'd had attached to his leg. When he pulled her out she was wearing a nightgown, housecoat, blanket and one slipper. She was frantically slapping at Jacob who'd pulled her from her fairly warm hiding place, buried in a feeding trough under a thick covering of hay. I was trying to figure out how they were going to get her back home since she obviously didn't trust Jacob and the wolves were sending her into a serious panic.

I flew down and landed on the ground and concentrated. I needed to try something else if we were going to get the woman back home without hurting her or scaring her into a heart attack. I imagined four long legs, a strong body, ears that would alert me to danger and a nose that would help me find food and avoid predators. Kyle was wrong, it wasn't so bad to be an herbivore, just a little different. I stood and tested my steps and my skinny legs felt strong. I trotted out from behind the outbuilding and the sight of the wolves sent a shiver through me even though I recognized them and they knew who I was.

I could feel the wind blowing my mane and tail and I looked at the woman who seemed to recognize that I was there to help her. She calmed immediately and came to pat my muzzle in wonder. She looked small from where I stood and I realized that I was bigger than most horses. I knelt down like I'd seen some trained to do. The ice was rough against me but my hair was enough to keep me comfortable. "Jacob, help her onto my back and you climb up behind her. I think most of these old timers know how to ride, and she seems to like horses. Remind her that Kim's mom wants to see her!" I sent my thoughts to him and he easily did what I suggested.

Jacob didn't have to help her, she was eager to climb onto my back. He arranged her blanket to keep her legs warm and he climbed on too. When I stood I felt her legs squeeze my sides and she knotted my mane in her old fingers. Jacob put his arms around her to share his body heat and before she could fight him I started walking. Her memories might be failing her, but she still knew how to ride! When she clicked her tongue I knew it was safe to go faster, and I was able to find a fast trot that was covering the ground quick but safe. I had worried that the ice would be too treacherous for my hooves, but it wasn't a problem even when I had to leap the creek. Through Jacob's eyes I got an image of a large dark brown mustang which turned out to be well suited to the icy ground. I had actually been thinking of a Clydesdale when I changed which made me wonder again about racial memories.

It was almost two miles back to the house she had wandered off from and I was impressed that she had gotten so far without freezing to death. By the time I got her to her front porch she was talking to me and had already given me a name. I knelt down so she could get off easily and she begged me with childlike innocence not to run away before she could give me a treat. Her whole family was gathered around, making sure she was alright and listening to Jacob tell where he'd found her hiding. While they were listening to his rescue story, Jared changed back and Kim gave him his clothes. No one seemed to pay attention to the horse, even when I stood up. The little old woman paid attention to me and she offered me an apple while she patted me. It was delicious and it was gone so fast it left me craving other vegetables and fruits.

The woman's family wanted her inside where it was warm and soon I was forgotten as Jacob said his goodbyes and Jared went inside with Kim. Embry and Quil were both still hiding off in the woods and I trotted along that way myself. Once we were out of sight I heard them thinking 'wonder if she's still the fastest?'

If they were normal wolves I'd have no problem outrunning them, but they were enormous and I wasn't used to galloping. But still I took off as they yipped and gave chase. I heard Jacob weakly warn us against racing but it wasn't an order and I wanted to win. The mustang was built for speed, and I wasn't an ordinary mustang, but a huge one. I knew the woods well, and I tore through the icy landscape with powerful legs and soon left the wolves behind. I was about to turn around to gloat over my victory when without warning a huge tree limb cracked from the weight of the ice and fell directly in my path. Too late to jump it I crashed into it and felt my legs tangle in the smaller branches. I went down hard and felt snapping and tearing in my legs. I screamed at the pain, and I knew it was both mental and physical. All the weight of me fell on top of what was broken and my mind fell into a merciful black pit.


	7. Chapter 7 Hurt

Chapter 7.

Hurt

When I came around I was cold. Jacob was still the wolf, but the rest of the pack had changed and there was Jacob and three very concerned looking young men standing around me trying not to hurt me. "Leah, you've got to change back so we can help you! You'll start to heal soon, but we need to get you back home or you'll have to have your bones re-broken.

I thought to Jacob. "I can't change....I'll be naked!" I knew I would be okay even though I couldn't remember ever being in as much pain as I was right then. But I'd never recover from the humiliation of having all of them gawking at me; and not just a passing glimpse.

I saw Jacob get angry then. "Leah, there's only one of us here who might even care what you look like! But even if the whole world sees you in the nude you're going to change, and I mean _NOW_! It was the power of the alpha; the order I couldn't disobey. It scared me more than it angered me since Jacob wouldn't use that power against me unless he felt he had no choice. Maybe I was hurt worse than I thought. I closed my eyes and kept them closed as I returned to being just Leah. I felt them pulling me out of the tangle of branches and I felt livid pain. I had to fight to stay conscious. When I was brave enough to open my eyes I started to shake. My right arm was obviously broken since bones don't bend in the middle like mine was. My left wrist felt broken as well. But my worst injuries were my legs. I looked like I'd been in a wreck; both legs were twisted and mangled and I was bleeding where bones had broken through the skin.

"Jared, run back to Kim's and bring back blankets.... and call....call Doctor Cullen!" Jacob had changed at some point,and he had taken charge; I closed my eyes. "Leah! You can't go to sleep now, you're going into shock; you've got to fight it! Think about your wedding Leah, talk to me about your plans; stay awake!" I was so cold and I just wanted to sleep, but I thought about Kyle and opened my eyes.

"I'm trying Jacob. I'm getting married on Valentine's Day....I can't freeze to death can I?" My teeth started to chatter and the shivering sent jagged shards of pain chasing up my legs. Jacob pulled my head into his lap and stroked my face to warm me. Then I felt two huge wolves carefully lying on either side of me like a couple of fur blankets. I was so thankful for my pack even though every movement sent fresh waves of pain through my body. When Jared returned he wasn't alone. Kim was clinging to the back of the wolf and she carried a heavy backpack. After her initial shock she went to work first covering me with blankets and then gently wrapping my legs to slow the bleeding. Even that small amount of movement and touch had me crying and gasping in pain. "Jacob, how am I going to get out of this mess? I can't even change into an eagle and fly, and if you try to carry me out I'm going to bleed all over the place! I guess my days of being the fastest are over!" I started crying. Jared had called back home as well and let Mom know what had happened. I tried to relax and wait for help to arrive, but I could feel my injuries starting to heal which took away any numbness and left me in agony. If not for the wolves beside me I wouldn't have been able to hold still.

I lost track of time while Jacob kept having to call me as I tried to drift off to sleep. I wasn't sure if I was dreaming or hallucinating when I heard the noises coming our way. First it was the sound of another wolf and the two beside me raised their heads. But there were other sounds as well, and a huge roaring that sounded familiar. Jacob warned Kim to stand back out of the way and he changed so he would be able to listen to the others. I felt the hackles of the two wolves beside me raise. The noises were getting closer and moving fast. I barely recognized Seth as he came skidding to a halt, first looking at me lying broken on the ground and then obviously communicating back and forth between the rest of them. One of the two wolves accidentally bumped my leg and it took a second for me to realize the one screaming was me.

When I could calm down I was almost stunned to see Doctor Cullen moving impossibly fast, and with a black medical bag in his hands no less! He came to my side and immediately started to check my injuries. Before he'd even looked at my legs he took my arm and snapped it the other direction, re-breaking the bone that had already started to heal. I screamed at the sudden pain and he apologized for the necessity. My wrist received a similar yank, setting bones back in place before he wrapped them in secure pressure bandages. I felt him give me some kind of injection and I hoped it was something for pain.

He then went to work on my legs. Just moving felt like my nerves were being ground against the ragged edges of the bones. I tried not to scream but it was the only release I had left since I couldn't run, kick or hit. It started to register that my screams brought an answering roar from Kyle as he charged into my sight. The huge grizzly stood up and fixed his eyes on me. "Kyle, don't worry, I'm going to be okay." At least that's what I tried to say, but I screamed again as Dr. Cullen pressed compound fractures back through torn flesh. Kyle came my way and I could tell he wasn't himself. This wasn't the Kyle that had carried me back from the lake on his back, this was the Kyle that had confronted a mother bear to protect me. Seth tried to get between the bear and me and I watched him swat my brother aside like a toy. Seth went flying through the air and crashed into the trees. I screamed at him to stop, but my words had failed me and I heard myself crying out in terror and agony. Still he advanced on me in his slow upright stance.

Jacob stood guard over me, once again a wolf snarling at the bear. He was then joined by the others, all placing themselves between us. "No! Don't do that, he won't hurt me, you need to back away!" I could tell my weak gasping whispers weren't getting through. I was delirious as Dr. Cullen worked quick and efficient to get me ready to move. I closed my eyes and retreated into the blissful blackness for a short time. When another jolt of pain caused me to wake up screaming I heard Kyle roaring an answer but I couldn't see him. I wanted him with me and was calling his name when another scream surprised me.

I saw the problem but I couldn't get my mind around it to fix it. Kyle was a gigantic bear trying to reach me while a doctor was trying to put me back together. Kyle wasn't calm enough to change back and I couldn't let him know I wasn't dying, which is what it felt like. The wolves were only trying to protect me from an out of control bear who was also my fiance.

I watched as the pack surrounded him and kept him in one place. One of the wolves charged in at what looked like an unprotected flank and Kyle knocked him aside easily. One by one they took their turn, and each time he easily defeated them. He didn't look like he was trying to hurt them, just get to me. I could see the wolves backing away, giving ground except for Jacob who stayed in close to keep him back. I still thought things might work out if Doctor Cullen could get me patched up soon enough Until I saw the black wolf come charging in. Damn! Why did Sam have to pick now to show up? I tried to get Sam's attention, raising up partway to wave to him, but only managed to call his name before my movements caused me to black out again and fall back to the ground.

When I opened my eyes again I watched horrified as Kyle had turned all his attention on Sam; obviously forgetting me for the moment. He dropped to all fours and ran at the snarling wolf. I watched helplessly as the bear I loved attacked the wolf I used to love. I was too weak or sedated to get their attention. Sam was no match for Kyle's bear and soon he was swatting him around like a stuffed animal while Sam gave ground again and again but didn't retreat. When another wolf joined Sam I felt tears trickle down my face as my worst nightmare was becoming reality. Locked inside a body that refused to obey me I begged for them to stop; Jacob and Sam were both facing the bear, and one by one the pack allied against Kyle. I watched them spread out encircling him and all at once they moved in, biting, and clawing him, keeping him off balance and on his guard. With so many attackers he wasn't able to use the advantage of his size and strength as they drew blood again and again.

My heart was breaking as I saw Kyle bleeding from at least a dozen bites and still he remained hostile. During the fight I barely registered that Seth had limped over to lay beside me. Doctor Cullen checked to see if he'd broken anything. I heard Kyle roar again and I heard pain in his voice.

I could see the wolves were winning and yet the bear wouldn't give up! I watched in horror as the russet wolf moved in and locked it's powerful jaws on the throat of the bear. I couldn't take it, even if it killed me I had to do something to stop it. I changed then. I wasn't the wolf, but a bear, just like Kyle. I surprised Doctor Cullen even though it wasn't a violent change. Once again I heard the pack mentality. "Stop Jacob! That's Kyle and your killing him! Stop now! I didn't hear words, just images of protecting the pack, protecting the tribe. "I want out of the pack Jacob. I'm not your responsibility anymore! I belong to Kyle. I mean it Jacob; I'm out!" I felt our connection break.

What I heard instead was the pain of the one I loved as he was struggling with everything in him to shake off the attack. "_Kyle_, I'm free now beloved! Stop fighting and change, Jacob doesn't have a hold on me anymore! If you ever loved me you'll do this for me!" He looked my way and I could barely keep my eyes open. The pain I felt from him was hurting worse than my legs. Just as I closed my eyes I caught sight of him as he laid on the ground and changed. Jacob would have to bite him again if he wanted to continue the attack. Kyle was himself again and badly torn up. I changed back to Leah and I could feel that my change had reopened many of my wounds and I closed my eyes to welcome unconsciousness.

I would find out later that Doctor Cullen took charge of the mess, sending the uninjured away and doing triage to see who needed his help most. I was still top of the list and Kyle was wrapped in a blanket beside me. All the wolves had suffered cuts, bruises and bites but they were already healing. Seth had a bruised leg that might hurt for a couple days. The doctor had to reset my broken bones but I don't remember since I was out of it. The bleeding in my legs was stopped and he was planning on taking me back to his home to use his x-ray machine to see how best to fix the damage.

I woke up briefly as they put me into the backseat of Dr. Cullen's car. Jacob apologized to me for attacking Kyle. It seemed the alpha fog had taken him too, along with the need to protect the pack and the tribe from what he saw as a dangerous threat. "I'm going to miss having you in my pack Leah. I'm really sorry it came down to that. I never even got the chance to tell you how impressive your new abilities are; you saved Kim's grandmother; we couldn't have done it without your eagle eyes and that amazing mustang. Don't worry, I'm sure with Dr. Cullen's help you'll be up and running again in no time. We do heal pretty quick, I've been through it before, remember? I barely remember what he said since I was under the influence of whatever medications I'd been given. At the mention of Kyle's name I started to panic about where he was and how hurt he had been. "We'll take care of him Leah; he's in shock but Dr. Cullen says he should be fine once we get him warm and he finishes healing. You rest and take care of yourself."

I don't remember anything else until I woke up in a room at the Cullen's. I was groggy and confused, but I soon recognized the faces around me. "It's good to see you awake Leah. Carlisle had to go back to the hospital but he seems to think after a week or two of rest you should be fine." Esme's concerned face smiled down at me and I realized I was in a bright white bedroom. I saw Bella and Edward waiting as well, but I was most surprised to see Emmett.

"Hey don't look at me so funny, I'm just here to get the whole story on what took you out. Carlisle said something about a bad encounter with a tree limb, but I'm thinking you look more like you tangled with that bear of a fiance of yours. I just want to know who won?" He grinned at his joke, but just thinking about the last time I'd seen Kyle had me breaking down in tears. Bella shooed the guys out of my room and she and Esme stood on either side of the bed trying to comfort me. Neither of them could tell me any news about Kyle or even the rest of the pack since it had only been about six hours since I'd been brought in. I'd been medicated to keep from tearing up the work Dr. Cullen had done.

"I'm going to go get you something to eat dear. Do you like soup?" I nodded and Esme left the room. Bella stood patiently at my side; almost too patiently. I realized they must have turned the heat up for my benefit. I wanted to ask how they had power when so many were without, but it didn't surprise me since the Cullens always managed to take care of themselves.

"Bella, did Dr. Cullen say how long I'd have to stay here? I don't mean to sound ungrateful, but I feel like I've left behind a pretty big mess back home and I need to get it sorted out."

"As soon as Carlisle let me know how you were doing, I called La Push and told your mom that you were going to be fine. She was frantic with worry about you and she assured me that your fiance Kyle should be fine once he wakes up. He's almost healed completely and he was resting while she was on the phone. Seth said not to worry about him either. Everyone else has gone home and Kim's grandmother is doing fine as well and her family sends their thanks." She smiled at me, "I think Carlisle wants you to stay here for a day or two at least before you are moved. He did some extensive work on your legs because of the way the bones broke and that you healed so fast they needed to be re-broken. He did say not to do any changing without your doctor's permission unless you want to get around like Billy Black for the rest of your life."

"I owe him a lot of thanks. There's not another doctor anywhere that would have been able to help me. And he just dropped everything to come as soon as we called."

"What happened out there Leah? I can't imagine what could do so much damage to you, I mean I thought you wolves were indestructible. I mean Emmett's not right is he?" Her beautiful face showed nothing but concern and I was hit again by how wrong I'd been about them.

"No, of course not. Kyle would never hurt me!" I didn't want to relive the horror of the day again, but maybe she could help me make sense of it all. "It's all my fault. Most of our pack went out to find Kim's grandmother who had wandered away sometime after the ice storm. We weren't having any luck finding her scent because she'd doubled back and taken a different path. I got a chance to show off my new abilities to the pack. Bella I learned how to change into other animals after we were told we were shape shifters. Just like Kyle had already been doing for years. I flew as an eagle and found her, then I changed into a mustang to get her back home since she was terrified of the wolves. It worked beautifully.

"But then afterward Quil and Embry challenged me to a race. I've always been the fastest and it was no different as a horse. We shouldn't have been in the woods, but I know those woods like my own back yard and the ground wasn't as icy in the woods. All it took was a heavy limb falling in my path and my legs got tangled in the branches. I didn't know that my legs could be so fragile in that form. I'm bigger than most horses and all the weight combined with the twisting of being caught....it was physically the most pain I've ever felt!"

"Jared called Dr. Cullen, and he also called my home. I don't know how Kyle learned what happened, but he and Seth came on the run. He was about half crazy and of course he was in his bear form. It was just like yesterday when he was here. He wouldn't change back; he seemed to see Jacob and the other wolves as a threat, and as long as he was a bear Jacob wouldn't let him near me. Then Sam showed up and everything exploded! They attacked him Bella; all of the wolves against my Kyle! If Sam had come with his pack I know Kyle would be dead now! I couldn't stop them; Dr. Cullen had given me something and all I could do was lay there helpless. I finally did change just to try to get through to him. I broke ties with my own pack....I had to reject Jacob's leadership and accept Kyle as my alpha so he could hear my thoughts. That's the only reason he changed back and the attack stopped."

Esme came in with the soup as well as a full tray of food. They helped me sit up and fed me since both arms were in casts. "Don't worry dear, Carlisle assures me that you won't have to wear these very long. It's just to encourage you to be still. The same goes for the ones on your legs." Just seeing the casts brought it home how badly I'd hurt myself.

"How in the world am I going to get married looking like this?" I started to laugh crazily. "Well at least they're white!" I caught the look Bella gave Esme across me and realized they thought I was losing it. Maybe I was, especially when I thought about the condition of my groom the last time I saw him. I tried to hold it together as the two of them helped me lie down and made me comfortable. "I think I'd like to rest now if you don't mind?' Bella's cold lips brushed my cheek and I tried not to react. She slipped out of the room silently.

Esme smoothed my hair from my face. "If you need anything at all just ask; we'll hear you." She took the tray with her leaving a glass of water with a straw on the bedside table. Once I was alone it took some effort to pull the blankets back since they'd tucked me in tight. Someone had dressed me in a rich pink satin nightgown. I might have liked it at one time in my life, but it was barely enough to hide the ugly casts sticking out below the hem. To make matters worse I saw that Alice must have sat with me since my toenails were expertly painted a matching pink and poking out from the edges of the plaster. A glance at my forgotten hands showed they had a coat of polish to match. I started to get angry thinking that Alice was messing with me, but then I remembered how she always dolled Bella up whenever she got the chance, and it was just her way of showing she cared. For just a minute I longed for my old defensive attitude; the one that didn't let me see things from someone else s perspective. If I started to cry I wouldn't be able to wipe my own tears. As it was just trying to pull the blankets back across me was almost more than I could handle.

I said I was tired, but what I really wanted was to be alone. Alone with my guilt and fears and a desperate longing for Kyle that had taken root inside me and started to grow the longer we were apart. Every time I closed my eyes I could see the way the pack turned on him; see Jacob trying to tear his throat out! Worse I replayed again and again Kyle's agony when I left the pack and could hear his thoughts. The whole thing happened just as I feared it would. I didn't expect to be so right. But then I thought that I'd played into Kyle's fears as well; recklessly racing through the woods trying to 'win' some contest. It was the part of me that didn't think she was good enough unless she could win. My old insecurity had almost gotten Kyle killed; the one who thought I was the best without ever having to challenge me! I felt the tears spilling out of my eyes to trickle down into my hair. I cried silently, not wanting to give the Cullens a reason to come back in to check on me.

I don't know how long I laid in bed staring at the ceiling and longing for Kyles arms wrapped around me. It was dark outside and there wasn't a clock I could see. The house seemed deathly silent even though I knew they never slept. It was so different from home where people made noise; cooking, laughing loudly, talking, watching tv, slamming doors, and even walking with heavy footsteps. Only when everyone was asleep could you expect this kind of quiet, and that was only if it wasn't raining on the old tin roof. Even Kyles home wasn't so quiet and it was partially buried. I missed the sounds of the ocean, ever present in the background.

The way my mind was working I was starting to doubt ever making it back there to spend my life with him. I started going down the list of things that could go wrong, or already had gone wrong. Maybe my family and tribe would find a way to keep us from getting married. Maybe Kyle would change his mind after all the craziness of yesterday. Maybe we wouldn't be healed enough to even get together and say our vows. The more I thought about it the more fantastical the obstacles became: Maybe the Cullens were only keeping me here for some future meal. Maybe I'd done more serious damage to myself and I'd never walk again; I couldn't burden Kyle with that. Maybe I would lose the ability to change and he wouldn't want me if we weren't the same. Maybe he'd come to his senses and realized he wasn't really in love with _me _but only an idea. I cried so many tears with every horrible thought that I knew my hair must surely be soaked.

I'm not sure when I fell asleep or even if I slept for long. In my nightmares I watched him die! He'd refused to change and Sam helped Jacob finish him off. He lost so much blood it ran to where I was lying and pooled around me. I saw his eyes glaze over and close for the last time. His dead body collapsed and he changed back to the man I loved with his empty eyes staring my way. I was screaming. I could hear my voice echoing but I felt stuck in place, held tight in the nightmare wondering if maybe our safety and survival was really the dream, and the reality was staring at me with dead eyes. I could still feel the pain and was almost convinced that I was still in the woods, and Kyle was dying before my eyes when those eyes were roughly pried open.

"Leah, wake up, you're going to hurt yourself if you don't stop thrashing around!" Little by little I started to become aware of reality. Dr. Cullen was wiping my eyes with a warm cloth saying my tears must have dried and glued them shut. The lights were on and it was still dark outside the windows. I could tell I'd moved and he easily pulled me higher up in the bed so my feet weren't pressed against the foot board. He started his examination and I could hear music off in the distance. The beautiful piano was enough to keep me distracted from the prodding and manipulating he did to check my progress. But soon the music started to haunt me and made me miss Kyle more. My tears followed a familiar path and Dr. Cullen asked if I was in pain.

"Nothing you can help with medications. Thank you by the way, for everything. I don't know what I'd have done if you hadn't been able to come and help me. And after I was such a....brat to your family."

"Nonsense, this is my job. But even if it wasn't, I still owe you and the rest of the wolves a huge debt for what you've done for me and my family. Laurant would have killed Bella for sure, and that would have killed my son. Add to it the way you helped us and supported us during the Volturi....visit. And I'll never forget that your family stood with us to face Victoria and the newborns when my own would not. And I can't help but be excited that we're not too many years away from a wedding that will make us all family."

At the mention of a wedding fresh tears leaked out and he unconsciously wiped them with the cloth. "Leah, I've asked that your family and friends give you twenty-four hours before they visit. They're welcome here of course, but you really do need to rest. Not to mention that they need to sort through some of the drama that happened yesterday before you get all worked up over it. That's the best I can advise you as my patient. We have been keeping in touch with them to make sure they know you're doing fine. And you _are _doing fine Leah! I imagine those casts won't be needed more than a few days with the speed you heal. I want you to let me examine you thoroughly before you change again. I saw yesterday how much stress it puts on your body, and even if your bones seem healed they may take longer to be strong enough to safely change." He smiled and patted my hand. "Esme's making you something to eat, then I'm going to give you something to help you sleep."

Almost on cue she came into the room with a tray loaded down with food. She seemed happy to feed me and I had to admit that she was a good cook. I couldn't help but notice the meal was rich in protean and calcium to help me heal and there was also enough for at least two people. She must have remembered how the boys could eat. She kept up her end of the conversation talking about the weather and how lovely the ice looked glazing every surface in glass. She spoke of her memories of a different time and place and how it was her joy to take care of her home and family. I couldn't help but listen to her as I chewed the food bite by bite along with milk from a straw. It seemed she was from a time when there was more value in being a woman.

"But I always thought women weren't valued then. I mean now we can get an education, and have a career and make our own money and own things like women of your time couldn't. How is it that you felt valued when you couldn't do any of those things?" She held the spoon in midair as I questioned her.

"There are many good things that have happened for women over time. We have more rights and freedoms for sure. But I think women of your time have lost some of their....femininity. I mean you have claimed sexuality, but at the expense of chastity and faithfulness. Well, I don't mean _you_ yourself, but I see so many young women falling into the trap of trying to be just like men! And men no longer have to step up and prove their worth! Girls today want to go out and claim everything the world has to offer except the roles that women have always had. They think they can turn their backs on the home, family, and motherhood , then they find they feel cheated when they can no longer choose them."

"There is a beauty in the balance of being feminine and letting men be masculine. We are different, and even though women _can_ do it all; men too for that matter, it's just so much better when we can partner with one another and be who we were made to be!" There was something about what she was saying that resonated within me. She smiled and went on. "Carlisle is my husband and he's a successful doctor. By today's way of thinking I am _only _a wife. But I love taking care of him and my family the best that I can. And he does the same for me in his own way. He doesn't expect me to have a career and compete with him just for the sake of a paycheck, but he would support me if I had a passion to make that choice.

"Women today think they have to live and compete in a man's world or they have no value. But there is value in being soft and embracing your femininity. Just feeding you and taking care of your needs is extremely gratifying to me." She smiled down at me and I was again embarrassed by the way I'd behaved toward her. "If I were a doctor I would hope to get joy from what I did as well. So many people today want to rate your contributions and measure them to determine what's more important and what's more valuable. This simple act of feeding you would be seen as menial and not valuable or important. But don't _you _think it's important to have someone who is willing to feed you? And isn't it valuable that I'm patient with your chewing and not irritated to have to do a less 'important' job? Imagine if you would a brilliant doctor who saves a patient's life only to watch the patient get weaker and weaker to the point of death because no one would 'lower' themselves to feed the patient!

"Oh I can see I need to be careful with girls your age. I don't want you to think that you should be relegated to tasks of servitude and that you can't have a brilliant career if you want. I'm just saying that you shouldn't have to deny you are a woman just to follow your passion. And you should not let the world tell you that your beautiful, feminine inclinations are not valuable! I've always wanted to be a wife and mother, in fact I didn't want to live if I couldn't do those things. By today's standards I am weak and of little value. But there are ways of being a strong woman even without all the trappings of worldly success. I like to think of myself as the foundation my family is built on. I support them and lift them up and help them to weather all their storms. It takes _more _strength to let yourself be female in a masculine world.

"Oh dear Leah, I hope I haven't put my foot in my mouth with all this talk. It's just that I've been worried about you ever since I saw you were part of the pack. I watched you again and again trying to measure yourself against them and coming up short. And of course I couldn't miss your bitterness over how your life had turned out. When Jacob told us you had run off this fall I was actually happy for you; and worried too. When I met your fiance yesterday I was so pleased for you! He looks at you like you are his treasure; every woman should have a man look at her that way! I just don't want you to make the mistake of thinking you always have to come out on top. I'm not saying to let the boys win, I'm saying take yourself out of their race! He treasures you and values you just the way you are; you have nothing else to prove!"

"Esme, if I had had this conversation with you before I went out to look for Kim's grandmother I might not be in this shape! Oh, who am I kidding; I don't know if I could have resisted the temptation to race. I love challenging myself, and when I run it's one of the best feelings in the world. Yesterday that feeling of speed and freedom was much greater than the feeling of winning. The winning was just a bonus."

"Oh I understand dear, believe me I know how glorious it is to be strong, fast, and nearly indestructible. But the problem when you challenge anyone but yourself is that someone has to lose. How much of yourself is wrapped up in the winning?" She smiled sweetly as she cleaned up the tray; I'd eaten everything without realizing it as she talked.

"My family plays baseball sometimes. You can imagine with our abilities the games can get fierce. I used to play too, usually on the side opposite Carlisle and I was a pretty good outfielder. I figured out where he liked to hit the ball and I could catch almost anything he could hit! It started to be something I looked forward to and I took great glee in bringing the ball back from wherever he hit it to with a little smug smile on my face. I would probably still be playing except that the games seemed to be getting tougher and more competitive each time we played. When we had an argument break out over whether Emmett was safe or out it nearly turned into a fight. I realized that we were all taking it way too seriously. I decided then and there that my best contribution to our games would no longer be in catching Carlisle's fly ball, but as the impartial umpire keeping the peace. I still get to have fun with my family, and he knows I can still catch whatever he can hit my way. I'm not weaker because I'm not competing, I'm stronger because my family is strengthened in knowing that I love them and will watch out for them. It's set an example that some things are just more important than winning." She smiled and patted my cast.

"I'm still trying to figure it all out. In case you haven't noticed I've only recently stopped being the center of the universe. It helps having someone in my life who believes I still am. Now if I could just stop testing the boundaries and accept that something good can actually happen to me."

"I understand that too Leah. There was a time when I thought my life could never be happy again. I've had a little more time to get it right and see how wrong I was!"

My eyes were leaking again and she wiped the tears without comment. "I'm sorry I was so rude to you last year. I've done a lot of apologizing since I've gotten home. I've blamed your family for all the bad things that happened to me for so long. I just thought that if you hadn't moved here and we hadn't changed then everything would have been perfect. But the changing has turned out to be the best thing that could have happened to me! I really think it's what we're supposed to be; not an accident or a response to your kind. And even if it is, it's still not a bad thing, and it's not your fault." She leaned over me to wipe my eyes and something started to dawn on me finally. I sniffed the air and smelled....fabric softener, shampoo, and maybe a hint of perfume! No odor! Esme didn't stink and I realized that I hadn't smelled it as long as I'd been awake.

I saw Carlisle come through the door and I told them both what I'd discovered. "I don't smell you anymore! I mean last year while we were here so often it was getting less offensive, but I thought it was just because I was getting used to it. But now it's gone! Is it possible this is a side affect of a medication?" I leaned over to the food tray and sniffed ….applesauce, broccoli and cheese sauce, yeast roll, peppercorn steak, and milk. I could smell the remnants on the plate but not the vampires in front of me! Carlisle looked puzzled.

"Nothing I gave you should have that kind of side affect." He stood perfectly still, thinking, then smiled. "Leah, didn't I hear Jacob say you'd left your pack? And not just to be on your own, but to join with Kyle?" He was laughing and I was trying to figure out what my pack affiliation had to do with my nose. "I think I've got to have a little more respect for that treaty we signed all those years ago! Not only did it give us clear boundaries and rules of behavior, but it seems it also included a way to know if those boundaries were crossed! If the wolves come into our territory we can smell you. In fact we can tell what you are just by your odor. I'm sure the reverse is true for you. I should have wondered why Rosalie was commenting on how good your fiance smelled. I just thought it was because he didn't change into a wolf, when all along it's the treaty! Leah, you're not part of the La Push pack, you're part of Kyles now so it seems the treaty no longer covers you! If it's any consolation, you smell pretty good yourself. I'll have to remind Jasper to stay clear of you now; at least until your wounds are completely healed." It made sense, but it was still a lot to take in. I'd often wondered how Bella thought Edward smelled so good when he smelled like something burned and rotten to me. I felt a little sad that I was no longer protected by our tribe's agreement; like I'd broken some kind of sacred trust. But then again it meant I belonged with Kyle. It certainly made my stay at the Cullen's a lot easier to take.

"Well Leah, I think you should get some more rest now. It's about two in the morning and we've got your schedule all messed up. I'm going to give you something to help you sleep and relax your muscles so you won't be as likely to toss and turn. When you wake up later there should be no problem having visitors if they can navigate the roads. I want to get some more x-rays then too, just to make sure everything's knitting together the way it should." He laid the pills on my tongue one at a time and held the glass while I drank water from a straw. "I'm turning the lights out, but I'll leave a night light on for you. No nightmares, okay?" He smiled and brushed his cool hand over my forehead.

I slept the rest of the night and most of the morning. It was about ten when I finally woke up and from the looks of the bed I'd had some terrible nightmares through the night. Fortunately I couldn't remember what had made me toss my blankets off the bed and soak the bed in sweat. Almost as soon as I woke up Esme was at my bedside to take care of me.

With Dr. Cullen's permission she brought a wheelchair in and she and Bella lifted me from the bed and placed me in the chair. I was surprised at their strength as they effortlessly sat me up with both legs propped up and sticking straight out like a doll. They rolled me into the bathroom and again lifted me so I could likely be the first one to use the toilet since Bella's wedding. I was embarrassed and anxious as they rolled the chair over and lifted it into the oversized shower. Esme hummed a happy little tune as she ignored my feeble protest and took off the damp nightgown and turned on the shower. "You need to tell me if it's too hot since I can't tell what's uncomfortable for you dear." Bella had gone off to find me something to wear while Esme washed my hair and the parts of my body not covered by a cast. "Normally we'd have to be careful to keep the plaster dry. Six weeks is the usual time you'd have to wear these, but you will be out of them before they have time to get a good bacterial culture growing!"

As soon as I was cleaned she wrapped me in several thick towels and lifted me and the chair out of the shower single handed. She had started to comb out my hair when Bella returned with the clothes. "I had to get permission to raid Rosalie's closet since she's the tallest of us here. She didn't mind nearly as much as I thought she would and she even recommended you wear a skirt so you don't have to worry about stuffing the casts into a pair of pants." I was already feeling self conscious when Alice breezed into the bathroom with us.

"Oh good, I caught you before you started to dress her! You can give that back to Rosalie, I've already got the perfect outfit for Leah; I ordered it last week and it's perfect for today!" She was talking to Bella but looking at me. "I 'saw' you wearing this after your accident and so I knew it would get here in time even with the storm." She presented a package that she opened up as I watched and took out a beautiful peach cashmere sweater and a cream colored soft leather skirt; both in my size. "Of course this means I'm going to have to redo your manicure and pedicure, but you're going to look adorable! And I can't wait to get my hands on that gorgeous hair of yours!" She ran her fingers through my wet hair like it was fine silk and I didn't have the heart to tell her no. "Oh, I almost forgot..." She pulled out slippers that were the exact same color as the skirt. "...these will fit right over the casts and you'll look like a porcelain doll when your visitors come. We're going to need to hurry if we want to be ready on time!"

The three of them dressed, blow dried, polished, and made me up for close to an hour and they would have taken even longer if my stomach hadn't started to rumble. Bella grinned, "how quickly I forgot those human concerns! Let's get you downstairs and feed you. I think I can still prepare a pretty good omelet, and we have juice and toast. Oh, don't forget to look in the mirror, Alice is an artist; she was even able to work miracles with _me_ and you're already lovely." Bella was starting to adopt some of the old fashioned speech patterns of the Cullen's. I wondered if I would do the same with Kyle's generation. I looked in the mirror Alice held for me and I barely recognized the woman looking back. Alice knew all the right colors to use and they had trimmed and styled my hair. I looked like I was ready for a party rather than recovering from an accident that might have crippled me.

They wheeled me out of the bathroom just in time for Carlisle to direct them to take me to the x-ray machine. It didn't take long for them to get fresh pictures of my bones. I was stunned to see them side by side with the ones taken yesterday; it looked like two different people. There was no mistaking the horrible jagged breaks and twists of the bones in my legs. My right arm looked traumatized and there were minuscule fractures in my left wrist as well. The new ones showed the bones were aligned as they should be and all the fractures were starting to knit back together. I was impressed with the work Dr. Cullen had done on me, and all without using the pins and plates that would have been necessary for a normal human. "If you keep healing like this those cast's should be off in a few days."

My entourage didn't wait around discussing treatment and physical therapy. They carried me and the chair down the stairs as easily as if I really were the doll Alice had mentioned. Bella started cooking an omelet and Esme made toast and poured juice and milk. I was feeling embarrassingly pampered as Alice combed through my hair again and fitted the slippers on my feet over the casts. When she was satisfied with her handiwork she stepped back and pulled out a tiny camera and snapped my picture before I could protest. She tucked a white throw over my legs and wheeled me in for breakfast, which was more like brunch. Alice took over feeding me while Esme cleaned up the kitchen. Bella went to get Edward and Nessie since Alice seemed to think Jacob was coming.

Rosalie and Emmett came through and found seats in the living room, obviously waiting for my guests. I laughed to myself that for all their animosity they seemed almost as anxious for my company as I was. Jasper breezed by and Alice smiled brightly his way. "It's okay, she's not bleeding anywhere. He cautiously approached keeping his eyes on her, nostrils flaring slightly as he tested the air.

I flinched as he slipped up behind my chair and I felt his breath close on the back of my neck. "Carlisle was right....she smells.... heavenly!" He lifted a lock of my hair and inhaled deeply, "Mmmm, like magnolia blossoms.....and fresh oranges! And you say she's not under the treaty anymore?" I turned my head to look at his face, just inches from mine and he locked eyes with me raising one eyebrow suggestively. I knew he could hear my heart speed up, but then he smiled and I knew he was teasing me! I blew out the breath I didn't realize I was holding and he laughed. "Emmett, I won that one. Don't forget I want two coats of wax next time and hand buffed!" I could hear the laughter in his gentle southern accent even as I wondered what the bet had been. He moved quickly and wrapped his arms around Alice and they kissed long and slow. She still managed to find my mouth unerringly with the forkful of eggs she held.

With perfect timing Esme came and took over the chore and they slipped off to go play together. "You really do look beautiful Leah. That outfit disguises your casts, and the color couldn't be more perfect for you. Alice really does have a gift. She's the reason Carlisle was so fast in getting to you after your accident, he already had the bag packed and was just waiting for the call. She usually can't see your tribe, but she knew you would be coming here and the kind of injuries you would have." Esme fed me the rest of the food and was just cleaning up when they pulled up.

I was almost giddy with excitement to see Kyle again. I'd been apart from him longer than I ever had since we'd met. Esme wheeled me into the living room and Edward held an eager Renesmee on his lap with Bella right next to him. The doorbell was almost silent, and it was only my super-human hearing that let me hear it at all. Esme went to the door with a smile on her face and invited everyone inside.

Jacob lead the way, noting that I was alive and well, kissing me on the cheek and asking the obligatory 'how are you doing?" Then he dropped the pretense and hurried over to Nessie to snatch her out of her father's arms and swing her around the room. Mom was right behind him and at least _she _had come just to see me. She threw her arms around my neck, and I had to quickly reassure her that I was going to be just fine to keep her from crying.

"So, look who's just relaxing and taking it easy here at Club Cullen!" Seth came in and pulled Mom away from me since she hadn't let up and I couldn't exactly push her away. "I should have gotten myself hurt a little more then I could join you! What's it been, room service? Hot showers? Gourmet meals? We're still without power back home and guess who didn't hurt the right appendage to get out of splitting wood?" He looked surprised when he finally got a good look at me. "Wow, they really are treating you like royalty! You look great Leah!" I smiled and nodded, trying to see around him. I wanted to see Kyle as soon as he came in, and Seth was taking up too much space!

I was confused when Esme shut the door and still Kyle wasn't inside. "Seth, Mom, where's Kyle? Is he coming in the other truck? What's taking him so long?" I heard the nervousness in my voice but I couldn't help it. I was even more worried as I looked back and forth between the two of them. "Somebody tell me what's wrong! Is Kyle okay?" I felt the tears in my eyes and I didn't care that I was ruining Alice's make-up job.

Jacob handed Nessie back to Edward and came my way. "Kyle's not coming Leah. He's not doing much of anything. We took him to your mom's yesterday like we promised, but he hasn't come out of his stupor....the lights are on but nobody's home! The only movement we've seen is he wandered from Seth's room into yours and he's been curled up in a ball, unmoving ever since. Leah, there's not a thing wrong with him physically; he heals faster than we do! But he doesn't seem to hear us and he hasn't said a word! We've told him what happened to you and where you are, but it's as if he's deaf, mute and blind! Poor Seth had to wrestle him into some clothes; he wasn't fighting, but he couldn't get him to uncurl. He hasn't eaten or had anything to drink as far as I know, even though your mom put the food right in his mouth! I've never seen anything like it.

I sat and listened to him and all I could do was cry. In all my worst case scenario's I'd never imagined that Kyle could have some kind of breakdown. "I need to see him! Now, whatever it takes I have to see him!" I was so helpless I couldn't even roll the chair without help. And that made me cry harder. Mom tried to comfort me, putting her arms around me, but I didn't want to be comforted; I wanted Kyle! "Please, someone take me to him! I don't care if you have to tie me into the back of the truck; I _need _to see him!" I felt on the edge of panic as I looked from one concerned face to another and no one was moving to help me. "Please don't make me beg.....someone....anyone!" I couldn't talk anymore as the sobs were choking out of me. I thought I was going to vomit my breakfast I was so upset.

Jasper came over and stood behind me. I wasn't nearly as aware of him as I'd been before, but in seconds I felt a calm and peace flowing over me. It was profound in that I no longer felt like I was collapsing in on myself. I still wanted to go to Kyle, but the desperate edge was gone. Dr. Cullen came in and offered to drive me home and Edward asked if he could go with us. "It's up to you Jacob, the treaty still applies even though it's got footprints all over it."

"Please Jacob! Maybe Dr. Cullen can help!" He didn't even look like he was indecisive, he looked like he was trying to find a reason to justify the visit. When he finally gave his okay I was anxious to get going. Jacob, Mom and Seth got back into the truck and started the long drive back home. Dr. Cullen pulled his car up front and Edward lifted me out of the chair and placed me into the backseat with a seat belt across my chest and another one holding my casts on the seat. They folded the chair up and put it in the trunk and soon we were on our way.

Dr. Cullen drove expertly and fast and soon we caught up to Jacob driving Billy's truck. We slowed down to follow even though I wanted to pass them. It seemed to take forever and I was trying hard to keep from crying. Alice had already had to wipe off the running make-up before I left.

When we finally made it to the house the place looked deserted and I remembered the power was out. Mom, Jacob and Seth went inside and Dr. Cullen popped the trunk latch to get the chair out. "Just leave it for now." Edward whispered. "I'll carry her in." He lifted me out of the car without bumping even one cast. We glided across the porch and Mom had the door open before he needed to knock. Edward set me down on the couch against my wishes. "You need to stay here first just in case something is seriously wrong with him. If he changed and you couldn't get out of the way it could be worse than what happened to Emily. I sat with Mom and Seth as Dr. Cullen and Edward both went back to my room. I could feel myself shaking even though the house was still warm and fires were burning in both fireplaces.

When they came back out I couldn't read their faces. Edward shook his head. "I never thought anyone but Bella or I could believe so strongly in something so wrong, but he's done exactly the same thing! Leah, he thinks you're dead! From what he saw yesterday you were too badly hurt to recover. The things he saw have him absolutely convinced that he witnessed your death. He's connected enough to you he felt your pain and heard your screams even before he was able to get to you. He saw you collapse and he watched your eyes close. There was a point when you stopped feeling the pain. He saw you turn into a bear and then he heard you inside his head like you were 'spirit walking!' You said something about being free and told him to change back if he ever loved you; past tense. He thought your spirit was saying goodbye to him! He didn't want to change back because he thought if he was a big enough threat, your pack would end his life. He did everything he could to challenge them and make them fight with him. He _wanted _them to kill him since he believed you were gone. When you made it your last request that he change he was denied following you in death." Anyone but Edward might have laughed, but he was as somber as his own memories.

"Physically there's not much wrong with him. He's a little dehydrated, but that's about all I can see wrong with him." Dr. Cullen was letting me know what he'd seen. "But he's unresponsive to everything we say to him. He's locked himself inside his head and he doesn't want to come out. If he was left alone he might come out on his own, but more likely he'd die of thirst. I could hook him up to an I.V., but because he's chosen to die he would likely rip it out."

"Edward, can you carry me in and set me on my bed; he'll have to believe if he sees me."

"Don't count on it. It might just seem too good to be true; he's absolutely convinced he's lost you. I can't even tell you the kind of delusions Bella had when we were apart." He looked as if the memory was a painful one for him as well.

Dr. Cullen seemed to agree with Edward. "Our minds work so mysteriously sometimes. It's hard to know what he will think. Right now he's deluding himself so much that he might convince himself that your presence is a sign that he's cracking up. We just don't know, and as your doctor I really don't recommend putting yourself into that kind of danger. If he tries to change and run away from you he could seriously hurt you."

I looked to Edward instead. "Please, you understand. He won't hurt me even if he thinks I'm not real. I didn't come all this way to sit out here and discuss him like he's some kind of problem to be solved! If you won't carry me to him, then please leave so I can do what I need to do!"

"Leah!" Dr. Cullen's voice barely registered as the stupid tears were already falling and my mind was made up. "If you change that wheelchair could be yours forever!" Edward glanced at his father apologetically and came to pick me up. He wiped the tears away, and his cold fingers actually felt good on my overheated skin.

He lifted me and carried me past my doctor and family, each of them would have stopped him if I wouldn't have thrown a fit. My room was much the way I'd left it except for the big man curled in the center of my bed. It broke my heart to see him like that with his hair covering his face and his knees drawn up to his chest. Edward set me gently on the edge of the bed and retreated to allow me some privacy. I knew he could hear anything that happened even from the other room.

It took me a few minutes before I could force words past the lump in my throat. "Kyle." I whispered. "Kyle I'm here and you need to wake up!" It was killing me that I couldn't reach out to him with all the cumbersome casts. "Kyle I know you can hear me....I'm not dead....and I love you! Please look at me!" I watched as he began to shake but I still couldn't see his face. Slowly he uncurled and stretched out on the bed. He laid on his back with his long legs hanging off the end by at least a foot. His tortured face stared at my ceiling, then he turned and looked my way obeying my request. I saw the recognition in his eyes and I smiled; they were wrong about his delusions and all he needed to do was see me! "I love you Kyle! See, I'm okay!"

His normally deep rich voice was dry and raspy. "My beautiful Tikaani. I'm so sorry I wasn't there to protect you! Please forgive me and take me with you this time. Don't make me stay here without you." He didn't reach out to me or smile and it took me a second to realize he didn't believe I was real; he was talking to my spirit! It was so frustrating! Without the casts I could have hugged him or shaken him or climbed on top of him to smother his face in kisses; I could have proved I was as real as _he_ was. Instead I sat here locked into some doll-like pose while he gazed at me like I was some kind of avenging angel.

"Kyle, you have to listen to me. I'm not dead! I am alive and sitting right here beside you! I got hurt yesterday and had to go to.....to see the doctor, but I'm getting better and it's not your fault! You know how I feel about you trying to protect me! Please, just touch me!" He turned onto his side and his eyes still didn't show more recognition. He reached out obediently and touched my arm; soft cashmere over hard cold plaster. He pulled back like his hand was burned. "No Kyle, touch my hand...or my face; not the stupid cast!"

"Leah, why do you come to torment me! I will love you forever and I will be with you again soon. I promise, nothing will keep us apart." He rolled onto his back and stared like a corpse at my ceiling with one hand folded over his chest. I recalled seeing my dad posed in his casket at his funeral just the same way.

"No! You will _not _do that to me!" I'd had enough of the stupid casts and I threw myself his way, toppling over and landing with my head on his shoulder. With a crazy kind of wiggle I was able to push and pull myself up until I was face to face with him. "Kyle get up! I'm not dead you idiot! If you don't stop acting like this I'm going to pummel you with my casts and make you _wish _you were dead! You're stronger than this; you don't just give up! And no matter how psycho you act you're still not getting out of marrying me!" I kissed his unresponsive lips trying to get some kind of reaction out of him. I wiggled up until I was almost on top of him and kissed him again. I felt his mouth move with mine, but still no real reaction.

"Kyle, I can't do this on my own; I need you!" The tears had started again now that my anger was passing and they dripped onto his cheeks. "Kyle, you are the strongest man I know, and I am in love with your superior awesomeness!" I felt him flinch and knew he was still hearing me. I kissed him again, and pulled his lip into my mouth.... and bit down hard! His eyes flew open and he saw me for the first time. His lip was bleeding but I couldn't help but smile as his eyes locked onto mine. "Welcome back my love!"

His arms came around me as he looked up at me in wonder. "Am I dead now too?"

"Don't be ridiculous, it's only a little bite! Unless I gave you blood poisoning we're both going to live a very long time!" I smiled and kissed him again and for the first time he kissed me back. His strong arms squeezed me painfully tight but I didn't care.

"Leah, how is this possible? I saw you die; I _felt _you die!" He kissed me again before I could answer. He reached up to touch my face and wipe my tears. "Don't cry....I can't stand it when you cry! Leah, my Leah, is it really you?" He pulled me closer to him and I wished I could hold him.

"This is real Kyle; I didn't die. Yesterday you weren't behaving like yourself. I'm sure with Jacob and Sam so close you were in that alpha rage. I was hurt badly after a bad encounter with a tree. Dr. Cullen was trying to help me and I was in so much pain I couldn't speak; every time I tried I would scream. Jacob didn't want you to get close to me since you looked like you were out of control. I don't think he fully realized the bear was you. Dr. Cullen gave me pain medication and then something to knock me out. When I changed into a bear I left the pack. Kyle I had to cut ties with the pack so you could _hear _me! You're the only alpha male in my life now; not Jacob and certainly not Sam! You should be warned that when we change I'll be able to hear your thoughts....it works both ways so mine won't be private either. I wasn't 'spirit walking' or trying to say goodbye to you. I was trying to get through to you through that alpha rage! As soon as I saw you change back I did too and the medications started to work all at once. I was unconscious and pain free for a while, but I wasn't dead!

"Where have you been all this time Leah? I couldn't even sense your body and every time I closed my eyes I felt like I was seeing your spirit laughing at me, or calling to me!"

"No body to find Kyle; I'm not dead, remember? If you saw my spirit I'm sorry. I'm not going to say it was all in your head because I've had some fierce nightmares that were centered on you. We're connected in more ways than one now. But I wouldn't do that to you if I had any control; certainly if I was truly dead I wouldn't torment you! I've actually been at the Cullen's, since that's where my doctor took me to recover. I'm alive and on the way to a full recovery thanks to him. I don't know if my injuries would have killed me Kyle, but they were serious enough I might have been permanently crippled without his expertise."

He moved then, pulling me up to a sitting position next to him. When he took a closer look at my arms and legs he could tell they were encased in plaster casts. "Leah, what in the world happened to you?! I never did find out how you got so injured. I thought you were attacked by something and I just knew it was my fault for not being there with you!" He held my arms up gently and his eyes followed down to my legs. "Oh Leah this is terrible! You've done such a good job of hiding it I couldn't even tell how bad you were hurt! Shouldn't you be in the hospital? What are you doing here?"

"I'm here because my crazy fiance thinks I'm dead! I went and got all dressed up for visitors today and the one I wanted to see the most didn't show up! What do you expect me to do, lounge around all day while you go and try to die on me! Three days Kyle....three days without water can kill a normal person, or maybe you would have made it a week, and I'd be out of the casts just in time to put you in the ground and throw the dirt in on you myself! You're already on your way there!"  
"Leah, calm down you're going to hurt yourself." He had his arm around me and my anger must have dispelled the last notion that I was some kind of a dead spirit coming to haunt him.

"These stupid casts and broken bones are nothing compared to how bad it would hurt me if you died over something so pointless!" I was crying again and he pulled me closer and kissed me, probably to shut me up. His mouth was dry and his lips were chapped and I wondered how long it would take him to dehydrate himself to death. If I had waited to come home would I have been too late?

There was a tap on my door and Doctor Cullen stepped in. "Edward let me know that you were able to get through to him. Do you mind if I look you over?" He was talking first to me then to Kyle.

"Are you the doctor she's been talking about? I'm sorry I barely remember you from yesterday. How did you get to her so fast?

He smiled. "I forgot to introduce myself. My family told me so much about you and my little granddaughter showed me what you looked like; I feel like we've already met. Yes, I was there yesterday; I had a little forewarning that Leah was going to need some serious help. How are _you _doing? You've scared the daylights out of my patient and I'd like to reassure her that you're going to be fine. I'm Doctor Cullen, but you can call me Carlisle." he shook Kyle's hand then quickly checked his blood pressure and temperature. "Your pressure's a little low and your temperature is a little high even for shape shifters. Do you have a headache? Any dizziness?" Kyle shook his head to both questions. "I think you can have a full recovery if you let Mrs. Clearwater have her way and feed you and give you plenty of liquids. Don't overdo it on the water at first, I'll leave you an electrolyte solution you should start with and increase slowly til you get about two quarts of liquids a day; more if you're outside or working."

He turned to look my way. "I was about to ask if you were assured enough to go yet, but Edward also warned me that you would probably not be going back with us. I can leave the wheelchair here with you until the casts are ready to come off unless you want to return and give Esme someone to fuss over again." He smiled at me and that same guilt hit me again. The man was not the evil monster I'd had him built up to be. When I smiled and shook my head I was almost sorry I wouldn't be returning with him. "No thank you, I'll be staying here if that's okay with you. Just let me know what I should or shouldn't do to keep needing that chair permanently."

"Just stay calm and heal for the next couple days. Come back to see me and I'll do x-rays to see where you stand. I'm sure those casts will be coming off then; you are healing so fast. I imagine you'll be up and around again no later than Valentine's Day." he smiled and I suddenly remembered what was supposed to happen on that day.


	8. Chapter 8 reminesce

Chapter 8.

Reminisce

"Doctor....Carlisle, can you and your family come to my....our wedding? I would love to have you there, and it's going to be outside so the smells shouldn't be so bad. I'll clear it with Jacob and Sam if you think you can make it." I watched him smile, wondering how anyone could think he was old enough to have adult children let alone a grandchild.

"I'll extend the invitation to my family Leah and see how they feel about it." Edward came through the door then. I'd almost forgotten about him.

"You don't have to ask Carlisle; Alice is already planning what she and Jasper will wear to the wedding. She wants to know if you _truly _mean casual or if that's just a nice way of saying no gowns and tux's?" He looked my way with the corners of his mouth turned up just a bit.

"Casual, truly casual! Your family will already outshine everyone there, and that's even if it's cloudy!" I never would have guessed that having the Cullen family coming to my wedding would have made me happy, but it did. Before they left they told us we could keep the truck until it was time for us to go back to Alaska.

Once they were gone Mom came in with a tray of food, water, and the electrolyte drink. Seth and Jacob offered to carry me out but I wasn't about to leave even if Kyle had let go of me. Jacob lingered in the doorway while Kyle took his time eating and refilling his fluids. "Um....Kyle, are we going to get past what happened yesterday? I can't tell you how sorry I am about that!"

Kyle looked up at him and ran his hand along his throat where Jacob had bitten him. "You tried to kill me! And now you want to apologize?"

"Well....yeah. What more can I say but that I'm sorry? Leah's not in the pack anymore so if you have a problem with me it doesn't have to involve her." Jacob clearly looked uncomfortable.

Kyle looked at him pointedly. "I know you weren't thinking as clearly as you normally would. _I _wasn't thinking very clearly either. Leah thinks it's got something to do with some alpha male/leadership thing. I'm a little irritated that Leah got into trouble when she was with _your _pack. But I know her, and I know trouble will find her no matter who's supposed to be in charge. She is really her own boss and that either of us think we can protect her is just wishful thinking. And considering what I thought had happened I'm not upset that you tried to kill me. I'm sure if you'd have had time to get more help I wouldn't be here now. Leah didn't know it but I did everything I could to antagonize you and Sam as soon as I heard her screams inside my head."

"As soon as we heard about the woman who'd gone missing Seth and I returned to help look for her. I ran into Sam here at the house when he got the call abut you being hurt." Kyle looked at me and grimaced. "Leah, I didn't even know what was going on, all I know is you were in trouble and Sam wanted me to wait here until he had more information before I went to find you. I don't know what came over me; I hit him! Not just once; he's built like a truck! I don't know how many punches I threw before I felt so angry I knew I was going to change. I made it outside and then I was running to you!

"I could smell the trail you left earlier and then I could hear you screaming; it was in my ears and in my head both! Seth must have followed along with me; I don't even remember seeing him until he got in my way! Is he okay? I can't believe I lashed out at him! I was almost crazy _before_ I saw you, after I saw the blood and the way your poor body was mangled....I lost it completely!" He squeezed me and kissed my cheek. "Somewhere it registered that someone was next to you and I knew it was a vampire. The last thing I would have thought was that he was there to help you! I could see you trying to reach me but those wolves wouldn't let you go!

"Jacob I couldn't understand why you were trying to protect her from_ me_ while a vampire was beside her making her scream! And I was angry with you because she wanted me with her and you were preventing it!" He was laughing and shaking his head. "I guess I'm a little crazy where this woman is concerned. I was willing to take on your whole pack _and _the vampire. When the Sam wolf showed up he was already angry with me and it didn't take him long to get you all allied against me. Not that it mattered since from where I was it looked like Leah was dying. I knew if I changed back you wouldn't keep attacking, so I wouldn't change. I'd already decided I wasn't leaving there alive if she wasn't." My cast rested against his side and my fingers were brushing the top of his leg. I couldn't move easily, but I could still pinch him, and I pinched as hard as my weak fingers could. "Ouch! Leah what are you doing?"

"The only thing I can do! You're the only one I've ever heard of to try suicide by werewolf! Do you have any idea how much I would have hated them for what they did if they had succeeded?"

"Awe come on Leah I told you, I thought you were already dead! Do we need to go into that again? You weren't going to be around to hate them!" Jacob stood forgotten in the doorway then gave a little wave as he slipped out. "Besides the boy couldn't finish it without help; remind me to show him where the jugular is located sometime!" I tried hard not to laugh.

"And maybe while we're in a teaching moment I'll show you what a pulse feels like! You know, it's your thinking that I'm so weak and vulnerable that almost got you killed, twice! Once by the pack and once by your own....stubbornness! Do you really think I want you to follow me in death? Kyle, I'm not that important!" I'd run out of anger before I could tell him how stupid ending his life would be. He sat beside me stunned, then pulled me to him with one arm while moving the tray with his other. He then carefully pulled me onto his lap and wrapped his arms around me.

"Leah, you're the most important thing in the world to me! I thought you understood that. I don't think you're weak, but I do feel vulnerable every time I'm away from you. I guess I'm lucky you're so strong because right now you're my only reason for existing." He kissed me softly. "Maybe some day it will be different and we'll have some kids I'll want to hang around for if I lose you, but right now....you're it. I'm sorry that's how I feel." He kissed me again, and this time I felt his warmth and his love and his wonderful taste.

I had to fight to pull away from him, especially since I didn't have the use of my arms. "Kyle, you need to finish your liquids."

"Woman, you're going to drive me to drinking!" he joked as he sipped from one of the glasses on the tray. I laid my head against his chest and closed my eyes. "Leah," I felt him stroking my hair and down my back. "You never did tell me what happened to you. How did you get so hurt?" I groaned. Well, the high horse was nice while it lasted. Time to face the music.

"Kyle, you're only going to be angry when you find out. Are you sure you wouldn't rather just sit here peacefully for a while longer?"

"Don't be ridiculous, you can't say anything that will make me love you less. And how could I be angry with you right now?" He kissed me and I could tell he wanted the truth.

"It's my own fault, Kyle. I wasn't attacked, I was racing with Quil and Embry from the pack and a heavy tree branch fell right in front of me. I couldn't stop and I got tangled up and fell." I was ashamed of all the trouble I'd caused.

"But that doesn't make sense Leah, you wolves are so resilient you should have been able to shake it off even if the whole tree landed on you!" I winced at his questioning look.

"You're right Kyle, _wolves _are tough enough to handle it, but _horses _are a whole different story! I thought I was strong and tough in any form,but but a gigantic mustang may be fast and powerful, but when all that extra weight came crashing down at high speed and all the wrong angles...." I looked down at my legs and shrugged. "In this one my body worked against me; too much speed and weight for the legs to support in a fall."

He looked at me incredulously. "You changed into a horse? You haven't seen a horse in months! I have no idea how you do it Leah!" He pulled me to him and kissed my forehead. "You are so impressive!"

"I can't believe you're not mad at me for racing! Everything would have been fine if I'd have just....let them go on without me."

"I'm not mad at you....you've got the worst set of consequences I could have imagined. Not to mention I heard part of the story about how you saved an old woman and she was all excited about getting to ride a horse. I didn't understand until now that it must have been you!" I kept encouraging him to empty his glasses, then Mom came in.

"Leah, are you two ready to talk and get some plans made? I think everything that can go wrong already has, so it should be down hill from now on right? Or am I just going to have to nail your door shut to keep you safe until the wedding? There is still going to be a wedding right?" She looked at both of us

"Absolutely!" I said. "I don't care if I have to go to the wedding in a wheelchair, I'm not letting him off the hook!" I smiled up at him.

"Mrs. Clearwater, I still want to marry your daughter, more than anything!" He was talking to her, but looking at me.

"Okay, if you're joining the family Kyle, you've got to call me Sue; you're older than I am for heaven's sake!" With that said we figured out what our schedule was going to look like for the week. I wanted to make sure the Cullen's could come to the wedding which meant I'd need to talk with Sam and Jacob. I also wanted to talk to Sam about the changing that Jacob's pack already knew about. Kyle had to fly back and pick up his family as well as make arrangements for their return.

I needed to make time to go back to have my casts removed and I also had to plan a shopping trip. I let Mom pick out the colors, the cake, and the menu for the reception. I kept insisting that she keep it simple, but she let me know that she and Dad had set aside money a long time ago to pay for my wedding, and she wanted it to be special. She had hired a photographer, and I regretted that there wasn't some way that Kyle could do it. As soon as the casts came off I had to have her dress altered for me. I told her about the necklace Kyle's niece wanted me to wear. I finally got Kyle to admit he'd carved the pieces himself.

As our scheduling frenzy wound down, Mom went to make dinner. The power had come on sometime while we were in the middle of all the planning and I was happy to see the relief on Mom's face. As soon as we were alone I cuddled up against him. "I want you to sleep in here with me tonight. I'll talk Mom into it and we'll keep the door open so she feels better about it. I know I won't have any nightmares if you're right here beside me! Once the casts come off you can go back to Seth's room; I don't think I should be trusted around such a wildly good-looking man without these shackles!"

He laughed in agreement. "Leah, have you given any thoughts to what you want to do after the wedding?" I gave him my best sweet and innocent look. Then smiled mischievously.

"Sometimes love it's _all _I can think about!" I kissed him, happy that he no longer felt so parched.

"No, I don't mean the honeymoon, I mean....when everything is over and we have to go back and live our lives. Have you thought about what you want to do? I couldn't help hearing your mom talk about how she wanted you to learn and grow and become who you are meant to be. I don't want to get in the way of that!"

"Kyle, don't be silly, you already _are_ in the way! And that's where you belong! You're part of my life now and always. Maybe this is just one of those generational things I don't understand, but I don't need to go out and 'find myself' just so I can feel fulfilled. I think for a while I'll be just perfectly content to just be with you. I'm thinking extended honeymoon, spending time getting to know each other, and ….things I'm not supposed to think about yet. But I also like the idea of going with you when you take pictures. I'd love to learn to help you, if it wouldn't seem too clingy to have me around so much." I watched his face for his reaction.

"I'd love to have you with me Leah! I've been trying to figure out how I was going to go do something productive and leave you behind! I was just wondering if you wanted to go to college, or take some courses, or ….anything's possible! I don't want to be the one to tell you what to do."

"Kyle, I've had a talk with someone with more wisdom than I will likely ever have. She's given me some insight that I don't have to run off and make a name for myself. I don't have to take the lead and fight to be some kind of a worldly success story." I smiled at him. "I will be happy for now just being what you need me to be. I want to be your wife; your partner, your helper, your lover, your friend, your companion, and your lover.... oops, I said that already didn't I?" I smiled up at him. "You matter to me, and you are what's important to me. Sure I might go off and become some inventor, or doctor, or writer, or ….whatever. I could have thousands or even millions of people who know my name and think I'm wonderful. But they would never matter as much as you do! If the most I ever do is make sure you drink your water and keep you from getting dehydrated, then my life has been a success." I smiled as he picked up his glass with a grimace.

"But that doesn't mean I"m going to be a pushover and adopt all your ideas until I become a doormat. I'm sure we'll have lots of conflicts, arguments, and fights. But I'll always love you, and that will always be important to me no matter what we both do with our time." I looked him in the eyes. "There's actually something I've been thinking about, but I don't want to do it unless you're with me." He looked at me encouragingly. "I want to go on a hunt. I want to do some research and some digging to see if you are the only other shape shifter we haven't heard about! I think that with all the supernatural creatures out there more of us could exist and we'd never know it unless we looked for them! Kyle, we could start with your brothers; find out where they've gone and if they've had children. We could look up others from your village and the other places around it! We know what to look for and we know how easy it is to hide it."

"Leah, the world is a big place. We could search for years and never even come close to tracking down even one like us! I've looked for more myself, and I haven't had any luck. I take that back; I had tremendous luck when you came right to my doorstep! I just don't want to see you go chasing after something that might leave you disappointed."

"Well, that's only part of the quest. See, if we start looking at native people who have stayed in their own territory and have kept their tribe and culture intact, we can then expand our search to see what kind of animals live in that area. Give us both a chance to learn some new forms. Give you a chance to take some more amazing photos and create some beautiful art! Then when we get tired of traveling and searching we can go back home. I want to try to find out if I will stop changing if we start a family. I want to know if our children will be able to change. I'm not anxious to lose this ability, but if it's the price to make you a father I'll gladly give it up! Just not right away, okay? " I felt his arms tighten around me. "Kyle, I need to tell you something."

"You mean something other than your desire to travel the world changing into animals?" he asked with a laugh. "You can tell me anything, Leah."

"What if I can't have babies?" There it was, one of my biggest fears, out in the open where the man I love could judge me. "I've often wondered why I'm the only woman to change. Add to that why Sam didn't imprint on me and it makes me wonder if I'm not normal. Like maybe I'm not complete or fertile. I think you should know in case you ….in case you want to change your mind about marrying me. It's a very real possibility that I won't be able to...." I tried not to cry, but just putting into words one of my greatest fears was more than I could deal with after everything I'd been through.

I felt like I couldn't breath, but then I realized he was holding me so tight. He turned my face toward his and wiped my tears. "Leah, it's you I love; don't you remember? I've loved you since the day you were born! You've always been mine; that's why Sam couldn't imprint on you! You can laugh it off like some kind of fantasy, but you know deep inside it's true. You came to find me, and if you couldn't change you never would have found me. If you want babies Leah, we'll have babies. It won't matter if you can give birth to them or if we adopt them or foster them. We've got lots of time to decide on how our family will grow. I certainly wouldn't reject you just because you weren't fertile! It's you I love. It's you I want to spend my life with. You're perfect just the way you are!" He realized he was crushing me and relaxed a bit. We sat quietly together and I was amazed again that such a wonderful and beautiful man could be mine.

When Seth came in to tell us it was time for dinner, Kyle took the opportunity to apologize for hitting him. "It's already forgotten. If you want to apologize for something, you should remember that I was the one who had to dress you! I'd rather fight a legitimate fight than wrestle a naked man! Just be glad Leah's not in the pack anymore or I wouldn't be able to hide the details from her!" he was grinning and I knew all was forgiven.

Kyle lifted me up carefully and carried me through the door, almost forgetting to duck he was so concerned with not hurting me. Sitting at the table with both Mom and Kyle competing to feed me or take care of my needs was almost more than I could handle. "Kyle come on, sit down and eat and let Mom handle me. You've got to recover too; doctor's orders. It was difficult to look stern when Mom shoved a bite into my mouth and Kyle poked the straw through my lips. Mom started to laugh as my cheeks puffed out and milk dribbled down my chin. Kyle wiped it before it hit my sweater, then he was laughing too.

"Oh Leah, it reminds me of when you were a baby! You used to fill your mouth with so much food you couldn't swallow it. Your little cheeks would puff out and you looked so cute!" I swallowed and rolled my eyes at my mom.

Kyle looked over at her and grinned "I bet she wasn't nearly as irritable then as she is now. Do you have any pictures I could see?"

If I could have I would have elbowed him. "She's not a baby anymore, and she's sitting right here! Laugh while you can; these casts come off in two days, and I can remember a lot longer than that!"

"I'll get the baby pictures out after dinner; you should see her first birthday!" She went on as if I weren't there and I groaned and slouched in my chair. Seth looked across the table at me and grinned, happy to be out of the line of fire. Dinner seemed to take forever with both of them chatting back and forth about my childhood while I tried to disappear.

When Kyle carried me to the living room Mom rushed off to find the photo albums. "Don't be mad Leah; I really want to know all there is to know about you. I don't have many pictures of myself when I was a baby; they got lost in the Great Alaska Earthquake back in 1964. Our whole village was destroyed and we were lucky to make it through alive. I can still remember there was a commercial fishing boat sitting up beside the main road where the water had left it." Mom came back and sat beside Kyle so I could be propped on the end. "Life was pretty tough for all of us since it took a long time for help to reach us. Fortunately we weren't used to a lot of help and we pretty much cleaned up and took care of everything the best we could."

Mom sat down and listened in awe. "I remember that! I wasn't very old....maybe six or seven, but there was a lot of damage along the coast even this far south. It hit even harder in Oregon and down to California! It was terrible when the stories came on the news. It seems funny that you lived through that Kyle; I think I even had a few nightmares about it since we live so close to the ocean ourselves."

"You know, now that I think about it I believe that earthquake may have been the thing that ended our tribal life the way we knew it. It was never the same after that. Once the government came in to rebuild and we had to start worrying about property ownership, public and private enterprises, and build roads to take people away. I'm not even sure how many people moved away and never came back. Maybe Leah's right and there are more people like us scattered from their native homes." He slipped his arm around me, trying to include me even though I felt a generation late for their conversation. Seth was still in the kitchen since it was his turn to do the dishes.

When Mom opened the photo albums I would have gladly taken over washing dishes. I wished I could get up and go hide in my room; maybe read a book or listen to music. Even when I was little I was taller than most kids and it took me a long time before I could take the teasing without wanting to punch someone. Fortunately my longer reach meant I could smack whoever was teasing me and still pretend innocence from two steps away! If I'd gone to public school I would likely have been suspended on a regular basis. But that wasn't an option for me, and punishment was handled in school by our teachers.

"This is her baby picture; the one they took at the hospital when she was only a couple hours old. We were lucky because up until a few years before she was born women rarely went to the hospital to deliver. It's a long drive and the weather is rarely optimal. But if we hadn't gone we might have lost her; she was breach and came out feet first! I used to joke that she wanted to be a runner from the very beginning!"

"Mom, do you have to tell all those embarrassing stories?" I had heard them so many times before they just annoyed me now.

"Yes she does Leah!" Kyle smiled at me and pressed his lips against the top of my head. "I really want to know all the details."

"Well then you'll love these next few pages!" She showed him my first year in photos, complete with comments and stories. I saw each picture through his eyes and little by little I wasn't so irritated. I also saw my dad in the pictures and it made me miss him in a way I wasn't ready for. When she moved on to the grade school years I cringed at the tall gangly child who seemed to want to be the center of every picture. There were some interesting pictures with faces that later became part of our pack. And there were also pictures of cousins and second cousins and our whole extended family. One with Emily and I shoulder to shoulder while Seth mugged in front of us. Seth came in from doing dishes in time to point out that he had lost his first tooth and had his tongue stuck out the hole.

The last album had my teenage years and it was uncomfortable to see the way my body developed before most of the other girls. And the unfortunate break outs on my face. She'd saved pictures from dances, my first date, and the first boyfriend who wasn't Sam I was surprised to remember. Then there _was_ Sam. In a surprising number of photos he was next to me, often with a serious look on his face. I never remembered him being so somber. The pictures told a surprising story; me with a goofy look and Sam looking at me like I'd lost my mind. Me giving an unsmiling Sam bunny ears. Me laughing while he was not. "Mom, thanks for keeping all these pictures; I'm glad you brought them out!"

"Why's that Leah? I thought you were mortified by all this old history." She looked across Kyle to see if I was being sarcastic.

"Well, so much of it _is _embarrassing. But look at these last ones....what was I thinking? Were we always so different together? Sam looks like he would rather chew his arm off to get away from me! Now that I think about it, I was a lot of fun back then and he hated that about me! Why couldn't I see it then? He was so serious; always looking ahead to tribal leadership , trying to be accepted by the older men. 'calm down Leah, don't laugh so loud Leah, is _that_ what you're wearing Leah, don't do that in public Leah!' He was so not right for me! Mom, why didn't you say something to me?"

"Well Leah, I just thought you'd figure it out on your own. Your father liked Sam a lot, and you seemed to have made up your mind. And don't forget you hit a point where you didn't want to take my advice except to do the opposite. If I had told you I didn't like the way Sam tried to squash your spirit, you just might have eloped with him!"

"Now why didn't _I _think of that!" Kyle looked at me and raised one eyebrow suggestively. "We could be married already if we had just headed to Vegas instead of coming here!" He smacked his forehead in an exaggerated 'I forgot' gesture. "I even gave up the chance to have Elvis marry us! And for that I get to sit and look at you and your old boyfriends. What luck!"

"You asked for it! I tried to warn you about the photo gallery, but you wanted to see the good, the bad, and the ugly!"

Mom couldn't let that one go. "You know if you had gone to Vegas I would have killed you Leah! You think what happened yesterday was bad, I would have had you _both _in casts!"

"Might have been worth it if we'd have had time for a honeymoon!" He grinned wickedly at me. He saw my reaction in time to block, as Mom swatted him with a photo album.

"That's my daughter you're talking about old man!"

"Ouch! That hurts, and I don't mean the album!" He pretended to be afraid of her and I couldn't help but laugh. "I can see where Leah get's her mean streak from!"

"Well, you just behave yourself! I need to put these away." She got up and took the albums into her room.

"She likes you; she didn't hit you with all of them! You know, right about now considering all that's happened, Vegas sounds pretty good to me too!" I grinned up at him.

"It's a little late for that Twinkle Toes!

"So, did the pictures of Sam and the old boyfriend brigade weird you out? I don't know why she keeps all those old pictures!"

"Nothing I didn't expect there. Except that I would think you would have had even more boyfriends than that. You're adorable and I can't believe they weren't lining up at your door!"

"They might have, except she had a mean right!" Seth spoke up from across the room; we'd almost forgotten he was there. "They had to have a lot of self confidence or be short on brains to ask her out. Not only could she run faster than most of the boys, but she'd hit harder and faster.....and with little provocation too!" He was lounging in the chair with his legs over the arm, confident that I couldn't get to him.

"Kyle, are you going to let that pup talk about your fiance that way?" I asked sweetly.

Seth looked up alarmed and swung his legs around. Kyle kissed my cheek "Aw Leah, I'm sure he didn't mean to offend you, did you Seth?"

"It's just the truth! I remember one guy had the nerve to suggest she wear a dress so he could see her legs, and she gave him a black eye! She would have given him two but the first one made him cry!" Seth was getting warmed up. I knew the way it was supposed to work; he'd pick and bug until he hit critical overload, then I'd chase him down and pulverize him. He knew what buttons to push; he'd had years to perfect the art. "What's worse is that she had to bribe him not to tell on her, so she wore a dress the next day!" Yep, he was in fine form. I smiled across the room, knowing that my temper wasn't even involved. He must have some need to challenge himself; either that or he liked beatings. "The poor guy thought that since she wore the dress like he wanted, she must like him. He made the mistake of putting his hands on her; and she blackened his other eye!"

Kyle looked at me and shrugged. "I would have paid money to see that; Leah in a dress or Leah slugging someone who touched her....both would have been worth it!"

"No Kyle, she was always meaner to the boys who liked her. She would go to the dances; look like every boy's dream girl, and ignore every guy there who wanted to dance with her. Then she'd go up to the one guy who didn't know she existed and ask _him _to dance!" Ouch, that really did happen. Okay Seth, if I could get up you'd be about ready for a beating. "Then when he turned her down, she'd take it out on the next poor slob to ask for a dance. I'm telling you, she's meaner than a...." Kyle saw the shadow of regret on my face and lunged. Seth knew it was coming and he was spring loaded out of his chair. They both tore out the back door into the cold dusk. Seth doubled back and I saw them race past the window and both of them were laughing!

When mom came back she shut the door and came to sit with me. "Do I even want to know what that's about?"

"Hmm, probably not. But while they're outside I need to ….ask you something." She turned her attention my way. "I want Kyle to sleep in my room with me; just until the casts come off. I know how you feel Mom, and I don't want to be disrespectful, but I've had nightmares about him when I didn't know where he was, and I'm afraid I might fall out of bed or hurt myself. Even Dr. Cullen had to give me something to relax me and make me sleep so I wouldn't toss and turn all night. If I need anything he can carry me or come and get you. I'll dress in something safe, and we'll keep the door open. I promise you nothing will be going on except sleep. As soon as I am out of these casts and can walk on my own, he can go back to Seth's room. I really just need him with me, Mom."

"It sounds like you've thought this through." She looked thoughtful. "Honey, you're twenty-one and you can do what you want. I appreciate you've taken my feelings into consideration. You know if your father was still here there would be no way he'd be staying here; wedding or no wedding. But I trust you." She smiled brightly. "And you can wear shorts under a long granny gown and keep the door wide open!"

"Speaking of what to wear, you know I'm going to need help with changing and ….other things. I guess I should have thought about that before I decided not to go back. Those vampires are sure strong!"

"Leah, I'm your mother. I'm perfectly willing and able to help you with whatever needs you might have! We can use that wheelchair and it won't be a problem. Do you want to get ready for bed right now?"

Before I could answer I heard Seth screaming outside. Amid the yelling I heard the words "I'm sorry Leah!" I looked out the window and I had to strain my neck to see what all the fuss was about. Seth was running around like a crazy person flailing his arms, screaming and yelling. "Call him off Leah! I'm sorry!" It took me a second to see what he was talking about. A huge bird plummeted out of the sky and landed on his shoulders. Powerful wings beat against the side of his head while it grabbed a tuft of hair in it's strong beak and pulled with _almost _enough strength to yank it out! Mom jumped up and grabbed the broom and I had to stop her.

"No Mom! That's not some rabid eagle, that's Kyle! She hurried and yanked the door open.

"Leah you better call him off! With that short haircut Seth needs all he has!" I thought she was going to be mad, but she hurried and grabbed her camera, clicking off several shots before I called to Kyle to let Seth off the hook.

She closed the door before Kyle could change back and she came to sit by me. She tried to hide it but she was laughing. "I take it Seth must have deserved that since Kyle strikes me as more patient than you are. I think you're going to have to wait to get ready for bed if that's what you wanted. Seth's definitely going to need a shower; not only did he slip in the mud, if I'm not mistaken that eagle pooped on him!"

I giggled. "Seth may have deserved a punishment, but I'm nor sure he deserved _that_! I'm only jealous I couldn't do it!" Seth came crashing through the back door and ran into the bathroom, slamming and locking the door behind him. Kyle came in a few minutes later, shirtless and ducking through the doorway like he was embarrassed.

"I'm sorry about all that Mrs....Sue. I wouldn't have hurt him, I just wanted him to be little more....respectful. I apologize if he becomes afraid of birds in the future, but something tells me he's more likely to learn how to do it himself and I'll have a more equal fight if it ever happens again!" He came over and kissed my cheek. "Does that restore your honor, my love?"

"Yes it does! In fact I never thought I'd feel sorry for Seth after letting his mouth get away from him like that. But I think eagle poop might even be better revenge than monkey bubbles!"

He looked embarrassed again. "Sorry, that wasn't really intentional. Someone's been forcing liquids on me all day....which reminds me, I better get dressed and – ugh, get something to drink. Didn't the doctor say hard work and physical activity will make it worse. At least he's not as fast as you are!" He went back to Seth's room and I admired his back as he went. I looked over and Mom was watching me.

"You know, I almost thought about pushing your wedding date out further; give us some more time to plan and maybe let the weather warm up. But now that I see the two of you together I'm actually glad I set an earlier date. It's funny, but after all the time you spent with Sam I still didn't feel good about you two getting married. But in just three days I can see you and Kyle belong together. Besides I'd hate to see the kind of trouble the two of you would get into if you had to wait longer!" She smiled and hugged my shoulders.

Kyle came back in fully dressed just as Seth came out of the shower. He looked at Kyle guardedly, and Kyle smiled broadly. "No hard feelings?"

"Of course not! Leah may never have pooped on me, but she leaves bruises! At least this washed off! Besides next time I'll be ready."

"Next time Leah will be able to fight her own battles. Better yet maybe there won't be a next time!" Kyle came and sat next to me and Mom got up and slipped off to her craft area. It was one of the things she loved to do in the evenings, and sometimes she'd sit for hours weaving baskets in the traditional way. With my injuries I wasn't able to even try on the dress I would wear and we were left with a lot of plans that we couldn't act on. Before Mom left I asked if I could use the phone. I forgot that even though I could press the numbers I couldn't hold it to my ear so I had to have Kyles help.

I know he was surprised when he heard my end of the conversation. "Hello Sam, this is Leah....Yeah I know.....I'm fine; or at least I will be in a few days. He's doing great, yeah fully recovered. Listen while I've got you on the line I just want to apologize for....taking you and everyone else away from helping out after the ice storm. Sam, you don't have to tell me it was stupid; I already admit that!" I could feel the irritation with him and fought to control my voice. "Um Sam, I called to talk to Emily, is she available? Yes, that would be nice....Hi Emily, it's ….yeah I know I'm the last person you'd expect to hear from but I wanted to ask you something. On Monday Mom and I are going to do a little shopping for the wedding and I wanted to know if you'd like to go along?.....I know, but we used to be friends; I'd really like to catch up, make amends, buy something cute for your new one on the way! Yes I'm serious, it'll be fun! Well, probably around eight. It'll probably be most of the day; we'll have lunch and maybe dinner on the way home, are you up for that? I just don't want you to get tired....oh, we can take lots of bathroom breaks." I glanced at Kyle and smiled. "Yes Emily, I really do want you to come....Great!" I ended the call.

"You know as serious as Sam is all the time I bet she could use some time away! Besides I many not have another chance to reconnect with her before she becomes a mommy." I felt contented as he put his arm around me and rested his cheek against my head. "I didn't even think about what you would do on Monday while we take some 'girl time.'" Do you have something in mind? Something I might be able to help you with? I'm sure Seth could show you around, maybe take you fishing or ….some kind of guy thing."

"Ugh, please no fishing! Unless I get to go as an otter that is!" He smiled and I remembered the adorable animal he'd been at 'our' lake. "Actually it might be a good time to see if any of the wolf shape shifters would like to try learning new forms. I know Seth wants to, but I'd need to make sure it was okay with Jacob and Sam since it could have an impact on their packs. I think you're right that the pack mentality keeps your tribe strong and together. But then again I seem to have some of the same....instincts that the wolves do so I wonder if it's part of who we are rather than what we change into. Bears don't imprint; neither do huskies for that matter and yet I fell hard and fast for you! Then there's that whole alpha thing....never would have thought about it before. I think if you're not around I shouldn't have difficulty keeping it under control. Hopefully any competition will be friendly."

"Just know without a shadow of a doubt that I would choose you, even if Sam had never imprinted on Emily. I love you so much when I compare it to how I felt about Sam even at our best, it's more like a mild crush. There's really no need to feel competitive; you've already won."

"Or lost, depending on how you look at it!" Seth spoke up from across the room where he sat unnoticed on the floor, sorting socks in the light from the kitchen. Kyle growled low in his throat as his head swiveled and he fixed his eyes on Seth in a cold stare. "Sorry, did I say that out loud? No offense bro!"

I tried not to giggle. I knew Seth was just looking for Kyles buttons and picking on me seemed to get the biggest reaction. "Hey Seth, I've got the perfect creature you should try to learn to change into; it suits your personality so well it should come easy." I grinned as the idea took shape. "I think you should just skip the foxes and bears and go right for the banana slug; you know how much eagles love to eat them! I bet you could turn into such a big slug you could feed a whole flock of birds for a week!"

"Ouch Leah!" Kyle grimaced at what I'd said. "I don't see Seth as a banana slug at all. In fact I see him more as....a squirrel! Just imagine the worlds biggest squirrel scampering through the treetops lobbing acorns at people below! Scary isn't it?" I giggled.

I couldn't help but join in. "Oh, I've got it now....the next time those out of town bloodsuckers show up, Seth can change into a squirrel and you can change into an eagle. You just pick him up by his tail and fly him above one of those leeches and drop him. Seth can then run up under those black robes....and tear em up if they don't die of fright!" I laughed so hard my ribs hurt, visualizing just such a scene.

"Oh very funny Leah, very funny." I could tell Seth was feeling picked on so I apologized. "But seriously, I really do want to learn to change like that. A squirrel might be fun....Kyle how small an animal can you do?"

He looked thoughtful for a second. "I've never done anything really small. It always feels better to stick with something strong and defensible. I don't even like being a moose even though they're huge. I'm not sure if it's my nature or part of what we are that makes me feel predatory when I change. Leah would actually be better to ask since she learns the animals easier than I do."

We sat up and talked until Mom came in to help me get ready for bed. She wasn't just joking when she said I could wear a granny gown and shorts, except she found an old pair of sweats she put over my casts instead. She was careful in removing my new skirt and sweater and even read the labels on how to clean them and sighed; dry clean only. "How about we drop these off first thing on Monday and pick them up before we come back home?"

"Sounds fine. I'm really glad Emily wants to come with us. If I get too....you know; insensitive around her will you let me know?"

"Absolutely. But I think we're going to have fun. I have a lot of shopping to do since part of your wedding celebration is going to be an old fashioned potlatch. I've got many gifts collected and made, but I have many more I plan to find while we're out. I've got a list of the guests and what I think they would like; we're going to need all the extra space in the Jeep." She was already going down mental checklists and I was feeling a bit overwhelmed when I thought of the short time left to prepare.

"Mom, I want to hep pay for some of the wedding. You know when I was working I didn't spend my money on much since I was still living at home. I have some saved up and I feel like I should help with something." I could see the stubborn look on her face even before I finished talking.

"No Leah, this is something your dad and I wanted to do for you! It's actually easier since you want everything so simple and low key; I'm putting more focus on the celebration afterward and less on the wedding. And don't try to talk me out of it since that's more for our tribe, friends, and family; you and Kyle are just the guests of honor!"

"Okay, okay. I said I'd leave it to you and I meant it. I just feel like I should take some responsibility for something. I don't want you to have to work so hard."

"Just wait, once we get all the gifts for everyone assembled I'm going to need all the help I can get to wrap them. We're not using paper, I'm wrapping them in textiles; fabric, towels, napkins, dishtowels, aprons, pillow cases.....anything I could find in your colors. That way we won't have all the paper to throw away, and our guests will have two gifts instead of one! But it's going to take some doing to get all of them wrapped and tied. I'll show you later....when I'm not so tired."

She yawned almost on cue and then she wheeled me out of the bathroom. It was the only time I'd used the chair since I'd come home earlier. When she slipped off to bed we informed Seth that he got to have his room back for at least two nights. He didn't know if he should believe us or not, but when I pointed out the night time armor I wore he grinned and headed off to bed. I insisted Kyle drink another glass of water before we went to bed. It seemed no one had the energy to stay up late and I was almost as tired as Mom. Before Kyle put me into bed he pushed the mattress as close to the wall as it would go, then laid me gently in bed where I wouldn't be able to fall out without doing a backflip. For decorum's sake he wore a T-shirt and sweats, but when he turned out the light he pulled me tight against him. The stupid casts made snuggling very difficult, but it didn't matter since I was asleep in minutes.

Saturday was usually the day I would look forward to all week. It usually represented fun and freedom, but the one before my wedding was anything but. I woke up in Kyle's arms which was the high point of my day and everything seemed to go downhill from there. The weather warmed and the ice melted bringing people out of their hiding places, each one wanting to stop by for a visit. I didn't mind the visits, but trying to explain how I'd gotten hurt to people who didn't know about shape shifting meant I had to lie to a lot of people and confess to a bad fall on the ice that had torn some tendons and required I not move for a few days.

Kyle had to spend time making phone calls to arrange someone to pick up his sister, niece and nephew after the wedding. I suspected he was also setting up something for our honeymoon even though I'd be just as happy to go back to his little beach side house and be alone with him. The only thing I could get him to tell me about the trip was to dress warm. Maybe we would go back home after all!


	9. Chapter 9 Vampire vs Bear

Chapter 9.

Vampires vs Bear

On Sunday I was eager to go back to the Cullen's to see if the casts could come off. Kyle drove me and we had the chair in the back, hopefully to return it. Carlisle studied the x-rays and shook his head and for a minute I was disappointed, thinking that I'd have to keep the casts on longer, but his words made me smile. "It never ceases to amaze me how fast you wolves....I mean shape shifters heal! One of my normal patients would have been in the hospital for a week or more and taken eight weeks to recover! I am going to take these off today, but I still want you to take things slow and easy. No shape shifting for at least a few more days; I'd like to see you back on Thursday to make sure you're finished with your healing."

When he took the casts off I was afraid to look, expecting to see hideous scars from all the damage. When I finally did look I was amazed that my skin was perfect! Dr. Cullen helped me stand for the first time in three days and I felt a little bit wobbly, but I got stronger quickly as he checked to make sure I was moving normally. "This is so wonderful!" I gushed. "I know I wouldn't be walking if it wasn't for you; I don't know how I can thank you!" I surprised him when I threw my arms around his neck and kissed his granite cheek.

He escorted me down the stairs and I was finally able to hug Kyle after three days of barely touching. "I'm almost sorry since now I won't have any excuse to keep you with me all night." I stood on tiptoe to kiss him as he held me loosely.

"How about I give you a reason?" Emmett looked our way grinning at Kyle. "I bet I could break a few bones and then you'd have the perfect reason to 'stay together all night,' he imitated my voice almost too well. How do you feel about a little one on one? Unless you're afraid I might mess you up too bad for your wedding!" He taunted Kyle and I looked around to see if anyone was going to stop it.

"Kyle, let's just go we have too much to do today. Besides, you've been sick and you're not at your best. And another thing, if he makes you bleed it could set them off and you'd have more than one to deal with and nobody wants that!" I couldn't stand the thought of him getting hurt, especially so soon after my own accident.

"I'd have to agree with Leah, you two shouldn't go through with this." Dr. Cullen had come to stand beside me and I hadn't even noticed. "Emmett, he's much tougher than you think. We already know what the wolves can do, and I've seen him take on five of them at once. He's not some pup who needs to be taught a lesson; he's a grown man with the capability to do some serious damage to you!"

"Sounds like more reasons the way I see it." Emmett seemed excited at the thought of his first real challenge since Bella had beaten him at arm wrestling. I was starting to feel sick at the thought of the man I loved facing a vampire for any reason, even for sport. Just knowing their bite was poisonous and they could go into a hunting frenzy if he bled....it was too much for me to think about.

"Kyle, come on let's just go. Think about how you would feel if I was the one thinking about going out and wrestling with Emmett."

It was the wrong thing to say. "Well Leah, you're the one who keeps telling me that I can't worry about you and try to protect you all the time! So if it was you, I'd be standing by helplessly while you made the decision on your own. Am I right?" He looked at Emmett and grinned.

"Okay Kyle I get it. You've made your point, now can we just get out of here!" I could feel a bit of panic spreading through me at the threat I saw. I think I would have grabbed him and forced him to leave if not for one thing; Alice danced in behind me and took me by the arm.

She looked me in the eyes and smiled. "It's okay Leah, just let him go. They can take it."

Kyle looked my way almost defiantly, then pulled me to him and kissed me fiercely. I wanted to scream at him as he stepped out on the porch, but Alice held my hand and winked. I knew that anger wasn't in Kyle's decision since he took the time to strip down to his boxers. Emmett instructed him to follow him to their baseball field and I almost cried when I thought about how many near disasters had happened there. Emmett took off running and I watched Kyle jogging after him a few yards before he changed. I wanted to follow, but Alice pulled me back inside.

"Don't worry, we've got ringside seats and you won't have to go running off behind them and get yourself hurt again." I had no idea what she was talking about until Edward joined us and let us know what he was seeing. I was confused at first but then I realized Jasper was at the field waiting for them. My stomach turned as I remembered that Jasper was the one with the least control where blood was concerned. Alice smiled innocently, "Don't worry, Jasper won't be tempted by Kyle in his bear form. And even if he changes back there is a difference that we can sense. It's just something a little off-putting about your blood. Like cookies sweetened with saccharine. If we were really starving I'm sure your blood would suffice, but it's not something we'd go out of our way to taste. And of course the La Push packs would just be vile!" She made a delicate expression of distaste and I smiled.

Edward spoke up. "They're at the field. It's cold and wet and Emmett is sizing up Kyle the bear. The bear is about two feet taller and he stands up and roars. Emmett rushes the bear and grabs him in a ….of course, a 'bear hug.' Kyle knocks Emmett in the head and he lets go." Edward played the announcer to the bizarre wrestling match in his head and I stayed close listening to him tell all the details of each hold, hit and throw. As the minutes went by Edward started to grin more and more until finally I had to ask what was so funny?

"Leah, you don't have to worry about them getting hurt, they've made the field into a mud pit! They're not just wrestling, they're mud wrestling, and they're both covered in it! They're both slogging around almost up to their knees and every time they hit the ground they sink in!" I saw Edward wince. "Ouch, Emmett just managed to throw Kyle into the trunk of a tree; he's on the ground. Looks like round one goes to Emmett!" Rosalie cheered and I groaned, suddenly worried. "He's okay Leah, he's already up and ready for retribution from the looks of him."

I hated getting second hand information from Edward even though I didn't want to see it myself. He launched into more announcer jargon and I found myself watching his face to see the emotions under his words. Every time his eyebrows went up I cringed as I feared he was on Emmett's side and taking some unconscious pleasure at Kyle's downfall.

He looked me in the eyes, momentarily forgetting the sportscaster talk. "You're wrong Leah; I haven't chosen sides; you're all like family to me now, and Emmett asked for the beating he's about to take."

Rosalie looked at him in alarm. "What do you mean he's about to take a beating? That bear better not hurt him or I swear....!"

"Calm down Rosalie, Emmett's not going to get hurt....much. But right now Kyles playing defensive and Emmett's getting a little overconfident. He thinks he's wearing the bear out, but Kyle's been studying his moves and fighting style and he's figured out a weakness or two and....Ooh, there it is! That's gotta hurt!"

"Edward! What's happening? Is Emmett okay?" Rosalie was as alarmed as I'd ever seen her leaving Edward speechless in the face of her questions. "This is useless, I'm going out there myself!" She took off out the door and I got up to follow her but Alice caught my arm.

"It's okay Leah, no one's going to get hurt." She smiled with a funny look on her face. Edward continued with his commentary, describing in detail how Emmett was getting swatted all over the field by a grizzly bear. But still he didn't give up and he kept coming back for more, occasionally getting in a good hit before being tossed into the mud again.

Edward stopped commenting for a second, laughing loudly instead. "They like this! Both of them are having the time of their lives; it's like two little boys in a mud pit! They could keep this up all day....but not likely; Rosalie just showed up. Oh no, this could get ugly. Kyle just tossed Emmett down and Ooh, he walked on him; smashed his face into the muck with all his weight....no, now he's sitting on him! I don't know how much that bear weighs, but he's got Emmett smashed flat! Right now I really wish Renesmee was down there instead of Jasper, this picture is priceless! Kyle's just sitting on him, and he's tapped the mud for a ten count, but it's too much for Rosalie....she's wading in! Now she's facing down the bear. You wouldn't believe it even if you saw it; she's shaking her finger at it and scolding him! Now she's shooing him away like he was a bee instead of a thousand pound grizzly! And it worked, Kyle just got off of Emmett!"

I saw Alice lean in toward Edward with just a ghost of a smile on her face. For one second Edward looked at her and nodded, then they both grinned and laughed. "It's over now, everyone's coming in and they're going to need to stop at the river and rinse off the mud, then I imagine they will all want showers....well, all but Jasper." Alice giggled again and Edward raised his eyebrow.

"Don't tell her now, let him tell her later! Quiet, they're coming in now!" Alice hushed Edward and we sat as if we'd just been waiting with no idea of what was happening. When Emmett and Kyle hit the porch they were both laughing. Kyle had his clothes in one hand and an arm around Emmett's shoulders like he was his best friend. He paused at the door, still dripping water and the occasional splotch of mud, but Emmett pulled him inside, leading him up the stairs to shower I assumed.

I was still watching them go up the stairs when Rosalie came in. She looked awful, dripping water on the floor she looked like a used teabag, wrung out and left behind. Her face was a reflection of how she felt which was even worse than she looked. I felt sorry for her in a way with her gorgeous blond hairstyle still coated in mud, and her previously pink blouse now a mottled gray and her white pants doomed to never be white again. She held her shoes in her hands and the delicate white pumps would never be worn again. She glared at each of us, daring us to say one word, then she stomped very ungracefully up the stairs as mud dislodged and plopped behind her.

I got up to help Esme who had already started to clean up the floor. "Go sit down dear, I've got this under control." She smiled and dismissed me back to the couch to wait for Kyle.

We almost didn't notice Jasper when he came strolling in. He was whistling and he sat next to Alice with casual nonchalance. He glanced up the stairs, then back at Alice, and with his voice barely above a whisper he told her, "You were right, that was too good to miss!" The three of them seemed to know what I'd missed, and Carlisle, Esme, and even Bella didn't seem to mind that they'd been left out of the loop.

"Is anybody going to clue me in to what I missed? Come on you three, someone tell me!" Bella came alongside me.

"Kyle will tell you all about it." She whispered in my ear. "But right now we're going to let Rosalie cool down before we get into it. She is the most vindictive of us, so please don't say anything to her." Before I had a chance to ask her how she knew what was going on she slipped back beside Edward and I saw them speaking to one another in that fast whisper they used. Of course.

Kyle was the first one to come back down the stairs, with his hair wet and his big smile. I hurried to him and put my arms around his waist, and he surprised me when he lifted me and swung me around. "Leah, that was a blast! I don't think I've ever had the opportunity to just cut loose like that before! Even when I'm hunting I have to always be careful or there won't be anything left to eat. These guys are amazing; they're better than a Timex....they take a licking and keep on kicking!" He laughed at his own joke. We then heard Emmett at the top of the stairs and Rosalie's distressed voice as well. It was almost impossible for me to hear what they were saying, but one glace at the Cullen's and I knew they were getting an earful.

When Emmett came down the stairs I saw Esme go up. Emmet seemed like he didn't have a care in the world and as he hit the bottom I saw he and Kyle looked like they were about to do a chest bump! He strutted into the living room and everyone was watching him, especially when Kyle went and stood nearby. "I think I have found a sport I like better than baseball!" Emmett laughed.

"I'd hardly call that a sport friend; letting me soak up a mud pit with your face is hardly sporting!" Kyle grinned

"Yeah, and knocking your furry butt into trees isn't very sporting either. But I would have beaten you if you hadn't figured out I didn't need to breath and squished me into the mud with half a ton of bear meat!"

"You don't need to breath?" Kyle feigned innocence. "I just thought you were already dead so I couldn't suffocate you! I mean the worst thing that could happen is we'd get a neat fossilized impression of where you bought it!" I stepped out of the way as Emmett lunged for Kyle and put him in a headlock.

"Seriously you guys, we need to get the rest of the wolves to play with us; this was so much fun!" Kyle elbowed him in the stomach and Emmett let him go. "The field is perfect when it's all muddy, you really can't get hurt! I'm serious, we can call it training day and invite all the shape shifters to come play!"

Kyle chimed in. "We can call it the Supernatural Olympics!"

"No, that's too formal" Emmett cut in. We can call it.... the Supernatural Smackdown!" He raised his voice and his eyes lit up and he and Kyle spontaneously gave one another a loud high five while the rest of us watched stunned. "Seriously, I was having a great time until Rosalie came out thinking that I was being killed!

"I wasn't going to kill him; I was just waiting for him to concede defeat." Kyle shrugged.

"You did not win that one! If Rosalie hadn't come out when she did I was going to mount a counter offensive that would have had you picking trees out of your teeth!" Emmett grinned.

"So, you're saying she was a distraction? It looked more to me like she saved your muddy carcass! At least I didn't need to have Leah come out and save _me_!" They were both laughing and talking trash.

"Oh, that's right! I forgot she can change like you do! That's it, next time we gotta get the girls involved too!" Emmett and Kyle were about to slap another high five when a small voice caught their attention.

Esme stepped quietly into the room and spoke softly. "I do not believe I would allow any of my young ladies...." she nodded her head in my direction, "....to participate in what would ultimately amount to female mud wrestling, even in the name of fun! Now if this is a pursuit you....men would choose, then please leave the women out of it. Am I clear?"

"Yes ma'am!" they both spoke in unison and I almost laughed.

"Well, I think that's my signal to go. Leah, are you ready?" Kyle came to me and slipped his arm around my waist. I kissed Esme's cheek as we headed for the door. Just as Kyle reached for the doorknob Rosalie came bounding down the steps showered, blow dried, and dressed in another stunning outfit.

"Leah wait! I have something you might want to use for your wedding. I know it's usually the bride that has something old, new, borrowed, and blue, but this is really something for your groom to wear. It's blue, and I hope you like it!" She handed me what at first looked like a blue neck tie, but as I infolded it I saw it was really a huge collar and a short nylon leash. "It works even better _after_ the wedding!" She patted my cheek and gave Kyle a dark look before she walked to the far side of the room, turning her nose up as she passed Emmett, and sitting herself elegantly in the farthest chair.

Kyle and Emmett shook hands at the door. Kyle treated me like I was still hurt, holding my hand as I went down the porch steps and helping me into the truck. I had laid the leash on the porch railing, and Kyle picked it up with a grin. "You just never know when something like this might come in handy!"

It took several minutes for us to navigate the driveway and as soon as we made the main roads I asked Kyle what had happened after Rosalie got to the field. "Well, she first ordered me to get off of Emmett before I killed him. Then she scolded me for even getting him involved in such a ridiculous competition. Emmett was trying to calm her down and he got mud on her pretty pink blouse and she almost attacked him. I walked away to let them deal with their own issues and she turned on me again. She called me all kinds of things; mostly related to being a stupid animal and not having any sense. No big deal; she was mad at Emmett and it was overflowing to anyone nearby. But then she made her critical mistake. She started trashing you Leah! I really don't want to repeat it, but it was just the wrong thing to say to me after I've come so close to losing you. Emmett tried to shut her up, but she was on a roll. I even saw Jasper wincing at what she said and when Emmett shrugged his shoulders I assumed he thought she deserved whatever she got." Kyle kept driving with his eyebrows knit together as he remembered.

"So what happened? No one at the house would tell me, but Alice and Edward seemed to think it was pretty funny."

"Um....I really should have held my temper. I need to learn to do that more often. But she just wouldn't stop, and I don't even think she realized what she was saying. I scooped up as much mud as my paw can hold and flung it at her face. I scored a direct hit, then I charged her and knocked her off her feet while she was trying to spit out the mud. I think I rolled her a few times until she looked like a donut dipped in chocolate. She didn't even wait for Emmett to come and help her up. She was plenty mad and she tried to hit me back, but she just doesn't have the strength, and she was too angry to use any skill. Emmett made a feeble attempt to salvage her honor, but the game was over. She was coated in mud and just as mad at Emmett as she was at me. I really didn't hurt her; I mean they can take so much more than I did. But even Emmett and Jasper understood that she'd crossed the line." He looked upset, but I was sorry I'd missed it. "Leah, I've never hit a woman before! I didn't think anything could make me go that far, and I'm ashamed I wasn't more in control."

I patted his arm. "Kyle, don't be too hard on yourself. Rosalie hasn't been a real woman for almost a hundred years. Not to mention she's been trading on her good looks for even longer and you only did what so many of us have been dying to do for a long time. And you didn't exactly hit her, you just got her dirty....very dirty from what I saw!" I tried not to sound so pleased, but I was happy that he'd stuck up for me; again. Now the hard part would be to make sure I didn't make too many messes he would need to get involved in.

"I just got so carried away with the fun....Leah, this just isn't right! I have got to learn that being in an animal form doesn't excuse my behavior!" he slowed down, and turned the truck around. In minutes we were back at the Cullen's being greeted at the door by Esme. "I need to speak with Rosalie if she's available." Without being called Rosalie glided down the steps with a stone cold, look on her face.

Kyle didn't waste time on small talk. "I had a chance to calm down and realized I needed to come back. I had my reasons, and maybe I could justify what happened, but I know without a doubt that there is no reason for a man to ever treat a woman the way I treated you this afternoon. I'm ashamed of myself. I never want to be that kind of man; even if I'm a bear. I came back to humbly apologize to you for my behavior. Please let me know if there's any way I can make it up to you, and I'll also be happy to pay for the clothes I ruined. I hope in the future that nothing like this ever happens again. I'm truly sorry." We both stood at the door waiting to see how she would respond.

I watched her stillness, almost afraid to take a breath. When she moved I thought she was going to slap him, but instead she laid her hand on his cheek and looked into his eyes. "Thank you Kyle. You have no idea how many years I've waited for a man to say those words to me." She glanced at me and smiled slightly. "Now I have another reason to envy you Leah." Her comments left me puzzled, but she drifted away from the door and went back up the stairs without another word.

Esme appeared at the door with a sad smile on her face. "Rosalie has a very sad story of how she came to be with us. It's not mine to tell, but if you can ever hear it you night understand a bit more of why she is so....prickly. It was nice of you to come back Kyle, it means more than you know.

As we drove back home I had to be content to hold his hand when what I really wanted to do was smother him in kisses. More and more the things I learned about him made me certain that I hadn't made a mistake. At home Mom was excited that I had my casts off. But without wasting time she was on the phone to her seamstress friends and they got together so I could try on Mom's dress. Kyle and Seth went off together while we had a fitting and made plans on how to make the dress exactly what I wanted.


	10. Chapter 10 Planning

Chapter 10.

Planning

Since Mom and Dad had gotten married in the eighties her dress was more elaborate than I wanted, with a high sheer mandarin collar and a skirt made to be worn with a crinoline slip for maximum fullness. What we decided was to take out the sheer inset and the high collar leaving a pretty V-neck and long, narrow lace sleeves. We also decided to change the waistline and not use a crinoline slip. Her friends seemed confident that they could remove the skirt and clip out a lot of the fullness at the seams, then reattach it for a slimmer look. We also decided that the train was too much for outside, and instead I asked for a tea length dress which would mean that they wouldn't need to add fabric so it would fit me. I had to insist to the ladies that I didn't want to wear a veil since they seemed to think that every bride needed a lot of netting attached to her head.

Mom had gotten Kyle's measurements two weeks ago and someone was actually making him a shirt and pants that would go with the theme of our wedding. I was impressed with the talent of the women in the tribe and I was looking forward to our shopping trip the next day so we could buy gifts for many of them. I was beginning to love the potlatch idea even though the old fashioned ceremony could sometimes deteriorate into a way for wealthy tribesmen to show off. Mom had been planning something like this since I'd become engaged to Sam, so she'd had time to collect a multitude of gifts already. I liked that this wedding would be one where the guests received gifts rather than gave them. We'd also told anyone who asked that we wouldn't be able to carry much back with us so we didn't want gifts.

After the fitting I called Jacob to arrange for Kyle to spend time with him and his pack the next day. "He wants to show everyone how to shape shift like he does, but I thought you should know that there are concerns that it may weaken the bond of the pack if they can just....turn into an eagle and fly away. I know that I feel a bond with Kyle now, but I'm not sure that would translate the same with you and your pack. It's a concern and I wanted you to have a chance to think about it; maybe even ask Sam about it too." I had a memory and I smiled. "Jacob, now that I think about it, I still felt the bond on the last day I was in the pack! And even before that when I was in Alaska I could still feel the connection. And your alpha command worked even when I was a horse, so maybe this isn't such a bad thing after all!" We made arrangements for Kyle to meet with any who were interested the next day.

I spent the evening helping Mom prepare the potlatch gifts she had already collected and I was amazed at how varied the treasures were for the different people. Instead of favoring people of importance and status, she'd given the more lavish gifts to people who had less. Some of the gifts were simple things she'd made, but the baskets she'd woven were in the traditional style and very well made. She also made dolls in tribal costumes, and beaded necklaces from hand made clay beads. Some of the less advantaged guests would be going home with small kitchen appliances, warm blankets, new shoes; she'd actually confirmed sizes, hand knit sweaters, and even outdoor sporting equipment. I had no idea how she planned to wrap the fishing poles, but I was sure they would be appreciated. As I looked ahead to Saturday I knew that there was still much to be done, especially since we hadn't even begun the food preparation. Wisely Mom had decided to put someone else in charge of the food for the day of the wedding so she wouldn't be going crazy trying to oversee the feeding of all the guests.

It was a lot of small preparations that left me drained as the sun went down. When I finally saw Seth and Kyle coming through the door for dinner I barely had the energy to collapse into his arms. It took me a few minutes to notice the strange grin Seth couldn't seem to wipe off of his face. "Okay guys, what's up?" I was suddenly suspicious as they looked at each other guiltily.

We had a few minutes until dinner and they were anxious to show me what they had been up to. We went outside and Kyle actually picked me up and carried me across the uneven ground as we headed towards the trees and the storage shed. Seth disappeared behind the shed and I knew he was taking off his clothes to get ready to change; I'd seen him do this on many occasions. Kyle put me down and he waited for Seth. I was expecting to see the young wolf come around the shed, but what I saw instead was a squirrel! And I knew in a heartbeat it was Seth, the whole attitude was his even as the small creature in front of us. And he _was _small, not like the bigger animals we'd always changed into. If I hadn't known better, I would have thought that the squirrel I saw was just any other squirrel.

But the looks were where the similarity ended. Seth took off, lightening fast and all but flew up a nearby tree. I could barely see him as he leaped from branch to branch, jumping so far it seemed he was flying. I held my breath hoping he wouldn't slip or fall, but he was more agile than any animal I'd ever seen. When he jumped from the tree from about thirty feet up I gasped, watching him flip and tumble toward the ground. I ran to catch him, and he landed squarely on my head. I didn't expect the solidness of his body which felt like a stone where he hit my skull. Then he grabbed small fistfuls of my hair and slid to the ends and swung out like he was on a rope, only to let go and fly to Kyle to land lightly on his shoulder.

"Oh great, Tarzan the squirrel. I muttered as I rubbed the sore spot on the top of my head. The animal chattered at me, then leaped from Kyle's shoulder and scampered behind the shed. When he came back out he was still dressing, but he was so excited he could barely pull his shirt on.

"You two thought it was such a joke to think of me changing into a squirrel, but all I could think of was, 'Cool! Run through the trees, jump from the branches, be able to sneak up on enemies, and surprise them from above.' Not to mention if I get hungry I don't have to hunt something and kill it; acorns and nuts are all over the place! When Kyle told me it would be easier to change into an animal I was already familiar with, I knew I could do a squirrel. I've been watching them from my bedroom window for years, especially when some of the elders said you can tell what kind of winter we're going to have by the colors of their fur."

Kyle smiled and ruffled Seth's hair. "I think I might have had a wrong idea about shape shifting. I've been so concerned about _becoming _the animal; really getting into it's head as well as it's skin, but Seth has shown me that that's not as necessary as I believed. He retains much of his own mass when he changes, which is why it hurt when he landed on you; I should have warned you. He's still small like a squirrel, but he's too heavy to be carried off by a predator. He also keeps his own thoughts so he's fully Seth in his thinking. It's more like he moves into the squirrel and takes over. Like a shared experience. It reminds me of the legend you told me about the wolf and how your people agreed to share the body of the wolf. I think that's what I was missing! That's probably why it's so easy for you since you've already understood from the beginning. So when I change into a bear, I have always _become _the bear when what I should be doing is sharing the form of the bear so we are both better! There is such a spiritual aspect to this I never understood. There's a choice of how much of yourself you want to give over to the animal, and I've almost given myself entirely when it's not necessary! It makes me a pretty fierce bear, but not a very good man. In fact I think I've come closer with some of the other animals which might explain why you like the fox so much." He grinned at me. "Maybe if we learn more about how much of ourselves we carry into the change we might prevent accidents like the one that hurt you so bad."

Mom called and we hurried back to the house for dinner with Kyle insisting on carrying me since it was already dark and the ground was freezing again. After dinner I did the dishes and cleaned the kitchen. Kyle came in to help me and it made me so happy to think that I would get to spend my life with him just doing normal things like drying dishes and putting away leftovers.

When bedtime came I was tired and regretted that Kyle would be sleeping in Seth's room again. It didn't take me long to fall asleep, curled up in a ball like I would as a wolf. First thing in the morning Mom had me up and getting ready. We made breakfast for everyone and I helped Seth clean out the Jeep so we would have room for whatever we bought. When we left we went by to pick up Emily and I was surprised how excited I was to spend time with her.

She was on her way out the door when we pulled up and I saw her kiss Sam goodbye. I waved and he scowled as I got out of the front seat and slipped into the back. "You didn't have to give up your seat for me." she protested as she sat down next to Mom.  
"No problem Em, I've heard about pregnancy and the circulation issues. Besides Mom will be able to see if you're getting tired and need a break." I stretched out in the backseat where I had plenty of room. Mom was true to her word and we pretty much shopped til we dropped. Emily wasn't kidding either when she said she needed to take many breaks. From store to mall we got good at finding the restrooms right from the start. Strangely I was more interested in shopping for Emily's baby than I was for my own wedding. I found a couple cute outfits and several toys I bought for her and she had to talk me out of even more. Mom had to force me to find a pair of white shoes for the celebration after the wedding and I picked the first ones she suggested that fit. I was also on the lookout for gifts for several people on our list and Mom was finding a lot of them as well as items to wrap them in.

As the day went on Emily gradually relaxed and warmed up to me until by lunch time we were laughing at any excuse. Mom had an agenda and she moved us along, but we were more interested in hanging out and being silly than shopping. I did make one trip through an antiques store for gifts for the Cullen family, remembering that they were from a different time I tried to find what they might like. I became the designated bag holder and I found myself looking like a display rack with so many bags draped on my arms. By the time we were heading back home the car was full of bags and Emily and I were both in the backseat cracking jokes and cutting up. Mom had the passenger seat loaded down with more bags and we stopped for dinner out. Before we left we ordered take-out for the guys. The day was successful and we'd crossed much of our list off. Mom stopped at Forks to pick up my outfit from the dry cleaners and we drove to drop Emily off. I had to help her carry her bags in since she'd found a few nursery items for the baby as well as what I'd bought her. Sam wasn't home so I didn't have to deal with any uncomfortable moments. I let Emily know that she was invited to drop by any time while I was home. I kissed her cheek and promised I'd never let anything stupid ruin our friendship again.

When we got home the house was dark. Kyle and Seth weren't home and we started carrying in bags without them. Just as soon as we were finished unloading everything from the car they came walking out of the woods. We all went into the house and they were grateful we'd brought back food. There wasn't even time for talking between bites as they devoured everything and went to the fridge for more. "Sorry Leah," Kyle apologized. "We missed lunch and dinner; it's been a very eventful day!"

As soon as they were fed they told us all about how they had been with both packs all day, demonstrating the new aspects of shape shifting. Kyle was amazed that all but a couple of the youngest pack members had been able to change into something other than a wolf the first day. I was sorry I'd missed it since the animals they chose were more varied than he expected as well. Seth had the chance to demonstrate his squirrel and prove that it was a good animal to have around even in a conflict. Apparently the little rodent's teeth could gnaw through even supernaturally strong skin. Jacob did the one that surprised me most; becoming a large black stallion since Renesmee was into horses and horse books. He hoped he'd be able to give her rides since most normal animals would get spooked when Edward or Bella came near, and they weren't all that sure of Nessie either. Sam also chose a surprising animal, and he changed into a sea lion. I never knew he'd had an interest in them before. He also noted that he wouldn't be able to hurt Emily or the baby if he changed into something without claws.

Jacob learned even faster than I did, since after he'd gotten used to the stallion he also learned to change into a spotted owl. Paul changed into a black bear and Quil changed into a bobcat. Embry changed into a California condor which surprised me since there weren't any near us. As they told us about the different changes, it seemed clear that Jacob was emerging as the overall pack leader. Even Sam's pack showed special deference to Jacob and I was wondering if he would soon reunite the two packs, especially since Sam would soon have a baby to take care of. I asked if there had been any problems for Kyle and his alpha rage, but they both agreed everyone had been pleasant.

The next three days were busy for me, helping Mom prepare and plan, but Kyle was left on his own and he spent a lot of time with the wolves of both packs. At the end of the day he would tell me what each of the members were up to, and in the three days they were each able to choose a different form. I was a little jealous because I wasn't able to go off and practice my own changes. I also missed having Kyle around during the day. Emily did manage to come by and she confessed she was excited about Sam being able to change into different animals. Ever since the accident that had left her scarred she had been afraid of the wolf. She'd always wanted to be far away when he changed, but the night before he'd become a raven on the front porch and she was even able to let him perch on her arm.

She also let me know that she and Sam were planning on leaving right after my wedding to go away for a romantic Valentine's Day weekend. "So don't be surprised if you see us leave early; it's not you." I again apologized for leaving her wedding early even though she assured me that most of the guests didn't notice. I waited for the pang of envy that her romantic news would have brought me less than a year ago, but it didn't happen. Instead all I felt was happy for her.

The Thursday before the wedding Kyle was flying back to Alaska to pick up his sister and her two youngest children. I was excited to be able to see Ahnah and Akiak again as well as his sister Lora. He had a friend from his flying club agree to come and pick them up the Sunday after the wedding. I had too many things to wrap up for the wedding so I was staying behind for the trip. Instead Seth was going in my place since it was never a good idea to fly alone. I hated letting him go without me, but I kissed him goodbye and waved as he took off with a grinning Seth beside him. I was extremely grateful that all the weather reports were favorable both for the trip and the wedding on Saturday.

Mom and I spent the day decorating the community center for the potlatch/reception. The more I thought about it the more I realized my simple wedding was turning into quite a celebration. Every time I ran into someone out and about they would tell me how they were expecting to see me on Saturday. Mom was preparing enough food for well over a hundred and fifty guests, and I know we had boxes full of gifts for everyone who would attend. I had the final fitting for my dress and I was so overwhelmed with how well it turned out I almost cried.

It seemed everything was in place and almost ready to go except the people. I waited eagerly for Kyle to return late in the afternoon. Mom drove us to the airstrip since the Cullen's borrowed truck wouldn't hold everyone on the way back home. As soon as he got out of the plane I ran to him and held him tight. As soon as I looked at his face I realized something was wrong. I did a quick check of everyone there and no one was missing. "Kyle what's wrong?" I asked as quietly as I could.

"We have a little unforeseeable problem that came up. Let's get everything unloaded and we'll sort it out, okay?" I helped unload the suitcases from the plane and introduced Lora to my mom. They seemed to warm to each other right away and I was wondering what kind of trouble Kyle was talking about. We loaded suitcases into the back of the truck and Kyle went through all the post flight procedures before he pulled the plane into the hangar. Everyone seemed to have had a good flight and I still hadn't seen what Kyle was so concerned about.

For the trip home I thought that Kyle would drive with Lora and Ahnah and we'd take Akiak with Mom and me so he and Seth could keep each other company. But Seth surprised me, instead almost pleading for Ahnah to come with us instead. I wondered if the two boys had had some kind of disagreement until I noticed the attention Seth paid Ahnah. He watched her every move and never seemed to be more than a couple feet away from her. I immediately looked to Kyle and his eyes told me everything without saying a word; my little brother Seth had imprinted on Kyle's niece Ahnah!

I didn't argue over the arrangements, but I forced Seth to sit in front with Mom, and I sat in back with Ahnah to talk with her and find out if she had any idea what was going on. She was such a sweet and pleasant girl it was hard to see if she was just being polite to Seth or showing interest. Then she asked me about the necklace and I told her I was indeed planning to wear it. "Don't forget I want it back!" She reminded me. "Someday I want to wear it at my own wedding!" she smiled and her eyes briefly went to Seth before she looked away shyly. She knew! I was stunned, Seth hadn't even had a first girlfriend and now he had chosen the one who would be his wife! I hoped that Mom would be so busy with the wedding that she wouldn't notice. I was trying to wrap my mind around the problem of the distance that separated them, not to mention the problem of them both being so young!

Once we got back home I was overwhelmed with trying to find space for everyone. Mom had it figured out in a second; She and I would share her room for the short time they would be there. Ahnah would sleep with her mom in my room, and Akiak would share Seth's room with him. It left Kyle on the couch, but he was fine with the arrangement. I wanted desperately to spend some time alone with Kyle, so we volunteered to drive into town to pick up pizza and bring it back for dinner.

In the truck I held his hand as we took the familiar roads into Forks. "I'm sorry Kyle, I had no idea that something like this could happen!" He looked serious as he watched the road ahead, holding my hand. I was beginning to wish we'd slipped off to Vegas like we'd joked about. He was quiet and I couldn't tell what was going through his mind. "Kyle? Talk to me, you're scaring me."

He let out a deep breath and glanced my way. "I'm sorry Leah, this just took me by surprise. I've been very protective of my sister's children and strangely I feel the same way toward Seth. Being around him this past week has been like having a little brother, and sometimes a son. But when he first set eyes on Ahnah, I saw this look come over him and I recognized it almost immediately. It was how I felt when I first saw you! Part of me wanted to separate them and hope I could undo it; and another part wanted to move mountains to clear the way for them! This is crazy, she's only sixteen! And the whole way to Alaska I was talking to Seth about his plans for college. I know the only thing he can think about is her right now, but he graduates next year and I don't want to see him cripple his future because he can't think beyond a girl! Oh Leah, does that make me sound like a hypocrite?"

I laughed. "It makes you sound like someone who cares a lot about two young people with a lot of decisions to make. Well, on the bright side, so far this imprinting thing hasn't been wrong yet. Sam and Emily are happy, Jared and Kim seem to be good for each other, Jacob and Nessie are going to unite us all in a way we never would have thought possible, Rachel is smoothing off Paul's rough edges, and he's brought her home more often, and even Quil and Claire don't seem to be minding at all. And of course I _know _that I'm happier with you than I could ever be with anyone else! As far as I'm concerned it's the best thing that could have happened to me! It seems wrong to want to deny Seth the kind of love and happiness I've found. I only wish it had been a few years later."

"Well, as long as we're looking on the bright side; at least with them both so young they haven't had a chance to go out and get engaged to other people before it happened. How nice would that be to know you can skip all the dating and frog kissing just to find the perfect person to spend your life with; they have already found them! I just don't know what to do about the distance between them. I know if it was you living so far away I'd go crazy wanting to be with you. I've been thinking that maybe Seth can come and stay with us for spring break. It won't exactly be the extended honeymoon you wanted, but something tells me he won't spend much time hanging around our house!"

"And maybe Ahnah can go to La Push for the summer? I don't even know, do the home school kids follow the normal school calendar? I think maybe we're going to need to be creative and find a way to get them together without letting them....run off together."

"That's a good point Leah, I'd almost forgotten Ahnah is home schooled! Lora keeps telling me how far ahead they are compared with public school kids. What if we try getting them to the same college in a year? I'm sure she could get admitted even if she's a year younger. Find a way to make them wait four years before they get married."

"Good luck on that one Kyle; can you imagine waiting four years before we could get married? I like the idea of trying to get them both off to college before they get married, but if they feel what we feel, why wait?" I was trying to wrap my mind around the idea that my baby brother was in love; _seriously_ in love!

"I just don't know what I'm going to tell my sister. She only knows that I'm different. Now she's going to have to understand that her daughter is going to be involved with someone like me. I don't even know how Ahnah feels about Seth. They only had a little bit of time to spend together before we left, but she rode to the airstrip beside him, and they just seemed to hit it off right away. I almost felt sorry for Akiak since he and Set are the same age and yet Seth barely had two words for him!"

We pulled in to the pizza place and ordered four pizzas along with breadsticks and a couple salads just in case. The trip back home went fast, with the smell of pizza permeating the air. I chatted about some of the wedding plans that I needed him to know about. I tried to get him to tell me about the plans for our honeymoon but he insisted that it stay a surprise. "I've never been there myself, but I've always wanted to go; this will be a perfect opportunity to share it with you."

As we found places to set the food I noticed that he had his camera with him. I'd seen him on occasion with it slung around his neck, and I was wondering if he brought it more for the honeymoon or for the visit to La Push and the wedding. Whenever I asked him what kind of pictures he was taking he would only smile. "I've got a lot of film, and as soon as we get home and get the pictures developed I'll be happy to show you everything. He didn't take any pictures indoors, but whenever he went outside he had it in a case slung over his shoulder.

Once we got back we both observed Seth and Ahnah. He dug into the pizza immediately, pulling out the best pieces, then handed the plate to her with a grin. I looked at Kyle and whispered, "he's got it _bad_, Seth never lets anything get between him and food!" It took a comment from Lora to Mom about how sweet Seth was being to get her suspicions going. Soon there were three of us watching Seth as he pulled out a chair for Ahnah and ran to get her something to drink and napkins. We were so caught up in Seth's behavior I almost didn't notice Akiak serve himself a huge plateful of pizza with breadsticks balancing precariously on the top. Now _there _was Seth's appetite! He stood by the counter eating pizza like he'd never eaten before.

Before it was too late I served Kyle and myself and noticed that Mom and Lora were enjoying the salads. I took Kyle into the living room and we sat in front of the fireplace. "I think we may have another problem," I whispered. He looked at me alarmed and I was quick to let him know that I wasn't sure, but we might keep an eye out. "Akiak looks like he's starving, and I know you said everyone ate before the trip. He also had a sandwich before we left to get the pizza. I know he's a big guy, I remember thinking he reminded me of what you must have looked like at that age when I first saw him. But he looks like he's grown since I saw him three weeks ago! And that appetite reminds me of what happens before we change!" I shrugged my shoulders. "Or it could just be that he doesn't get pizza very often and he's enjoying it while he can; with teenagers you never really know!" I was sorry I'd said anything when I saw the worried look on Kyle's face.

"It doesn't make sense for Akiak to change. He's not had any exposure to vampires or anything like that! I mean unless one of them came to the village while I've been gone. Lora didn't mention any murders, and I'm sure she would have told me if anyone came up missing. Why would he change Leah?" I had no answer for him and we both sat by the fire in silence.

"Kyle, what if _we_ are his catalyst?" I kept my voice the barest of whispers but he still snapped his head to look at me as if I'd shouted. "What if we've been blaming the wrong people for all the changes? I mean, it makes sense to change when an enemy like a vampire threatens us, but would _everyone _need the same exposure to change? Or would it move through the tribe like a domino affect? I never even thought about it since there were so many vampires around when our tribe changed. But even the Volturi vampires didn't come through La Push; while the wolves came home every day!" I was starting to get a sick feeling in my stomach and the acidic pizza wasn't helping. I set the food aside and put my arms around Kyle as he looked a little sick himself. "I'm sorry Kyle, we didn't know, and maybe I'm wrong about the whole thing and he's just hungry."

Seth and Ahnah came through the room wearing coats and hats. "We're just going for a walk to take care of the pizza we ate." Seth mumbled in embarrassment. It was a flimsy excuse, but we all watched them leave with their fingers barely touching, like they wanted to hold hands but didn't want to be obvious. Not even a minute after they left there were four sets of eyes watching them through the windows. They didn't even make it out of sight of the house before their two silhouettes were embracing in the pale moonlight. I heard Kyle groan as he stepped back from the window. Mom and Lora came in and we stood there looking at each other wondering what to do, while Akiak finished off a pizza in the kitchen oblivious to the dilemma.

"Okay Leah, looks like a little chaperoning is in order." Kyle looked at me and we put on our coats for appearances sake and slipped outside to follow the two. We walked slowly, understanding all too well how desperate their need would feel to be together; preferably alone. We wouldn't have caught up to them so easily except they would stop every few minutes to kiss or hug and Seth's ears were more attuned to the sounds our footsteps made along the gravel road. When they stopped to wait for us they had their arms around each other, boldly exposing their feelings. It took me a second to realize Kyle and I were walking the same way, hip to hip with arms around each other. "Let's just keep on walking you two, I think we need to find a place where we can talk, don't you think?"

We followed them up the road, well out of sight of the house. I couldn't help but notice the way Ahnah would rest her head against Seth's shoulder and he would turn to kiss the top of her head. It was too familiar and I was having trouble wrapping my mind around the idea that my baby brother was behaving toward Ahnah like Kyle did to me! About a mile up the road I took the lead and we left the road to walk through an overgrown pasture to an unused horse barn. With the doors falling off and a hole in the roof it was clearly abandoned. But it was dark and quiet inside and we wouldn't be interrupted.

Inside we sat down on some overturned feeding troughs; Kyle and me on one facing Seth and Ahnah on another. We sat there eye to eye for a few minutes and Ahnah was the only one who seemed even a little bit confused, even with Seth's arm tight around her. "Ahnah," I began uncomfortably. "Do you have any idea why we followed you?" I was nervous and Kyle squeezed my hand.

"I guess you wanted to make sure we didn't go off to....make out or something. Mom knows I've never had a boyfriend, so I thought she would trust me more!" She sounded a little more hurt and confused than I expected.

I wanted to calm her fears because they were quickly reflected in Seth. "No Sweetheart, it's not your mom who had us come out. She doesn't understand what's going on here any more than you do. You haven't done anything wrong and you're not in any trouble." I took a deep breath and went on. "I know how you must feel having a good looking young man suddenly pay so much attention to you." I felt Kyle put his arm around me and I looked up to see the ghost of a smile on his face. "The same thing happened to me when I met Kyle. But we are a little bit older than you two so we didn't have to contend with family being concerned about our futures." I saw her confusion when I mentioned the future and I hurried to explain. "Ahnah, when Kyle first saw me, he fell in love with me; hard! I didn't have to say or do anything, it was almost like his spirit recognized mine as it's perfect match and an instant bond formed." She looked at Kyle, and Seth looked at me. "In our tribe we've seen this happen a few different times, and we call it imprinting. It's like when a baby bird sees it's mother for the first time and will follow her anywhere." I let this sink in. "But for us this imprinting is much stronger than a baby bird to it's mother; it's more like...." I looked at Kyle for guidance. "....two halves of a whole finally coming together. For those who imprint it's such a strong bond of love that nothing else in the world is more important!" I looked at Ahnah and I could see that she understood that Kyle had imprinted on me, but she still didn't get that Seth had done so with her.

"How does that sound to you Ahnah? To have someone love you even more than their own life? To want to become everything you would ever want in a mate, and make your every need their priority? How do you think that would feel? How do _you _think you would handle becoming the center of someone's universe? To know that every choice you make affects them as well? To know that when you're away from them for long, they suffer? To know that for you the search for the right guy is over since no one could ever come close to the one who loves you so completely? How would you feel to have that Ahnah?"

She didn't notice Seth watching her, but she smiled at me and answered immediately. "I think that sounds wonderful! I haven't had a boyfriend yet because no one who's been interested in me has ever made me feel like that; and I _want _that! I didn't even know it was possible until I saw Kyle with you. I know Mom and Dad don't have that with each other, and I made up my mind a long time ago that I wouldn't settle for someone who....didn't love me enough to do what's best for us both." I could see the tears in her eyes and Seth's almost panicked need to comfort her as he dried her eyes on his sleeve and pulled her closer. I watched them with a lump in my throat; why did they have to be so young!

I took another deep breath and decided I'd let the other shoe fall. "Seth, why don't you tell Ahnah how you feel. Don't be embarrassed because we're here; she needs you to be honest."

As soon as she turned to look at him the hole in the roof allowed the moonlight to spill over her pretty face. Seth seemed almost overwhelmed with her beauty, and he just stared for several moments, holding her hands and gazing into her eyes. "I think you're the most beautiful thing I've ever seen in my life! When I first saw you outside your house in Alaska I thought I was seeing an angel, but one dressed in white fur and with no wings! Ahnah....even saying your name makes my heart beat faster and being next to you I can forget about everything else. And it's not just because you're so pretty; don't think that please! It's just...._you_! I feel like I know you already and I just need to be reminded that you don't like pepperoni on your pizza, or that you're really good at math, or that your eyes have a little touch of green in them in the sunlight. I want to be with you. I can't stand the thought of you leaving after the wedding; I don't know what I'm going to do if I have to watch you leave without me!" He stopped talking and threw his arms around her, pulling her tight to him. With her head on his shoulder she had her eyes closed and a smile on her face as she wrapped her arms around him.

Kyle pulled me to him and whispered in my ear; "it doesn't look like she's putting up near the fight you did!" He helped me to my feet and we stepped away from them, slipping outside of the barn to give them a little privacy. If Seth was going to pledge undying, eternal love to Ahnah they both deserved to be alone. As soon as we were out of sight Kyle pulled me to him and kissed me. "You handled that so well, Leah! I probably would have warned them about lust and passion and gotten all off track."

"Oh don't worry, they need to hear that too! I just think they both need some time to let it sink in....five minutes should be enough, right?" I smiled up at him. "We need to lay out our ideas for their future before they go back and break the news to their moms. In four years this won't feel nearly so inappropriate; and they both need to think about their education. Oh Kyle it's like looking at a reflection of us! When did Seth get so mature?" I held him tight wondering how it was that _I _was now one of the responsible, adults. When we peeked in on them they weren't talking but were instead kissing with more intensity than we wanted to allow. I kicked the barn door and Kyle cleared his throat as we stepped back inside. They broke apart quickly but still held hands.

"Seth, did you get a chance to tell Ahnah about your....our secret?" Kyle asked as he sat down, making room for me beside him.

Seth looked suddenly guilty. "No, I didn't think about it. Do you think she needs to know?" He looked at us confused.

Kyle nodded. "Yes Seth, she needs to know." I said gently. You can't plan a future with someone if you don't know the important facts about their life. And I assume you _are_ planning a future together?" They looked at each other and smiled; yep, it's a done deal.

Kyle spoke up. "I think I can tell this part better, since Ahnah knows me, and it's my secret as well." He looked at her with the kind of love a father might have for a daughter. "This is something you're going to have to keep secret along with us. Your mom knows already, at least a little bit. But not your dad, and the rest of the family doesn't really know the truth either." he sighed. "Ahnah, I'm not really your cousin. Your mom isn't my aunt, she's my sister. You don't have an Uncle Kyle off chasing polar bears in the arctic, there's only one Kyle, and it's me.

"I can still remember when you were born, you were such a tiny little thing. I made sure I came around a lot so you would know your Uncle Kyle. Your daddy was always so busy with the fishing boats and your other brothers and sisters were a lot for your mom to handle. I tried to take some of the load off of her so she could feed you or take a shower herself. You two youngest ones were my favorite since I got to spend more time with you. I remember when you got pneumonia and it wasn't possible to get you to a doctor. I came every day to help your mom with you and I gave you the necklace I'd made in an art class using a dental drill to carve it out of shells. I had to make up an old legend about ancestral protectors so you would believe you were going to get better. Another child with the same illness in the village died the week before and we were scared we'd lose you too. You're the reason I got my pilot's license. I couldn't stand the thought that no one could get you to a doctor and I was going to make sure if it happened again there would be no reason to just keep you home and watch you suffer.

"I want you to understand that I am your uncle because you need to know why I don't seem to age. It's the reason the rest of the family has nothing to do with me, except for your mom. Ahnah, it's what the three of us here are, Seth and Leah too. We're shape shifters. We can change into different animals and we don't age normally after we start changing. Seth will continue to age until he's fully an adult, but then he won't get any older." We all sat and waited for her reaction.

She smiled up at Kyle. "Is that why the old people in the village call you Keelut Uncle Kyle? I always thought that was so mean of them, but it explains a lot. I didn't understand how you could look exactly like Uncle Kyle and still be his son. And we never saw the two of you together. And there was never a mother for cousin Kyle or a wife for Uncle Kyle. And the ages never added up since cousin Kyle showed up several years ago, but Uncle Kyle is younger than Mom. So how is it that his son would be so much older than me?" She looked like she was happy to have it explained to her, but then she looked at us all. "What the heck is a shape-shifter?"

Seth groaned and Kyle stood up. He stepped behind one of the horse stalls in the barn and we watched him as he undressed but we could only see him from the chest up. "Don't get excited Ahnah, but I'm going to show you exactly what we can do. Just remember it's still me and I won't hurt you. I've been like this for twenty-five years and it's only when Leah found me that I realized that there were more like me. He looked around to make sure he had room to change, then we all saw him almost explode outward into his grizzly bear form. Ahnah cut short a scream as she stared at the bear lumbering out of the horse stall. He came to me and I stood up and wrapped my arms around his neck and scratched him behind his ears.

"This is still Kyle, and this is only one of the forms he can take. He just happens to really like the bear. I can change too, and so can Seth." I watched her as her huge eyes followed Kyle as he paced in the small space. "Many of the young men in our tribe have gone through a change like this, and I'm the only woman so far who's changed. You need to know that now since Seth has imprinted on you. We sometimes change accidentally if there's a lot of danger, anger or stress. If you were standing too close during a change of that sort you could get hurt." She pulled her eyes away from Kyle and looked at Seth.

"You can do that too?" She asked with a sense of wonder. He smiled at her and nodded.

"I can change into a wolf, a squirrel, a hawk, and a caribou." he stated proudly. I looked at him amazed. He had been practicing!

"Can you show me?" she asked sweetly. And Seth almost tripped over himself getting up in a hurry to take Kyle's place and prepare for his change. When he changed the enormous wolf leaped over the low wall and landed beside her. She jumped up with a squeal of delight and timidly reached her hand out to touch him. Seth nuzzled her hand, then moved closer to lick her face as she giggled. "Isn't he adorable, Leah? Can you do this too?" I smiled and stepped behind the barrier too. In seconds I flapped up to the top of the wall and she was looking up at a huge eagle. "This is amazing! I can see why it's got to be a secret; no one would ever believe me if I told them!"

'She's taking this better than I expected.' I was surprised to hear Kyle's thoughts in my head since now we were part of the same pack.

'I just hope she doesn't think it's a game. At first it might seem like a novelty having a boyfriend that can turn into a hundred and fifty pound squirrel, but just wait until their first fight, or let him destroy his clothes in a sudden change and it won't seem so cute!'

'You're always cute to me Leah! And if you want to destroy your clothes, that's fine with me too!' I could hear him laughing in my head and I spread my wings and squawked at him. 'Don't be like that, you know I love you!' The strange thing was, with him in my head I could feel the way he felt about me more than just the words. It was breathtaking in its intensity and I hopped down from the wall and changed back. I dressed quickly and joined Ahnah facing the wolf and the bear.

"Are you starting to get an idea of how big this is? What Seth feels for you isn't just a crush or puppy love." I looked pointedly at the wolf. "There's something about what we are that makes this happen. I don't know how you feel about Seth, but when it happened to Kyle I wasn't exactly on the same page. It took a little longer for me to fall for him and it was a pretty rough two days!" I grinned at him and he snorted.

"So you didn't feel this imprinting? He fell in love with you and you didn't love him back? How awful! Leah, I'm already in love with Seth! I want to be with him and I want to plan our future together!" I saw Kyle move behind the wall and a couple minutes later he sat astride the bench and wrapped his arms around me. "We haven't had a chance to talk about the future, but I'm not going to do anything without Seth! I can give up college and we can get married right away, and it doesn't matter where we live as long as we have each other!" Seth dove behind the barrier and the next second he was himself, looking over the wall.

"Ahnah, that's insane! You can't give up everything for me! Kyle, tell her she's crazy!" I watched him struggle into his clothes, then he came back and sat next to her trying to put on his shirt inside out. "Listen, I love you! I'm going to love you forever and I won't let you give up your whole future for me! I listened to you telling Kyle on the way here how much you wanted to be a doctor and help your tribe and village. And now you're talking about giving that up? No Way! Honey I want you to follow your dreams; I want to be there for you every step of the way. I'll go to college wherever you go, and I'll study right alongside you, and encourage you when you feel down, and I'll cheer you when you do well." He pulled her to him and I could tell she didn't know what to think. _I _didn't know what to think about the responsible reaction from Seth. "I'm desperately, deeply, hopelessly in love with you. And if all you really wanted to do with your life is....retreat somewhere with me and live like hermits then I'd be happy to do just that. But before you knew how I felt about you, I saw the passion in your eyes when you spoke of your dreams, and it would break my heart if you gave that up for me. You don't have to give anything up just to be with me....except maybe dating other guys; that could be a bit of a problem."

I was so proud of my little brother I almost came to tears. Kyle looked at the two of them sitting so close they could have been joined at the hip and shook his head. "We need to make some plans, and by that I mean you two. You're not going to be able to hide this from your moms for much longer, and I think your mom already has a clue that this might be more than a crush, Seth. If you want them to take a hard line against you, just come back gushing about giving up college and not caring how you survive!" He looked pointedly at Ahnah and she looked embarrassed. The way we figure, you two have about a year before you can both head off to college. Seth graduates next year and Ahnah is at least a year ahead of kids in normal schools. So for a year you two are going to be spending time apart....or we will work something out.

He had their attention fully when he outlined his plan. "If you two can wait a year before you take any permanent steps....that means no elopements or babies heaven forbid! Then we'll see that you can spend as much time together as possible. Seth, you better start saving your money now, since an engagement ring might make her daddy feel a lot better about your intentions than just your ever present grin. And Ahnah you better continue to do well with your lessons. What I'm thinking will involve Seth coming to stay with us for a short time after we get back from....our honeymoon. Then Ahnah can come here for the summer. We have a friend who may be able to help you get a job at the hospital; which could help you out in your future medical career, so your mom might approve.

They agreed to our plans, knowing that we had their best interests at heart and understood how they felt. We finally stood up to go back home. "Seth, you better turn that shirt right side out unless you want this whole plan to fall apart." Kyle warned as he took my hand and helped me up off the low bench. When we got back Mom and Lora were both sitting on the couch laughing like old friends. When I looked around I didn't see Akiak and I asked where he went.


	11. Chapter 11 Supernatural

Chapter 11.

Supernatural

"He's not feeling well, so he went to lie down in Seth's room. I think it's probably got something to do with the flying today combined with all the pizza he ate tonight. I'm sure it's nothing." Lora seemed satisfied with her understanding of it, but Kyle went to check on him anyway. I listened to Mom and Lora go on about different tribal customs, comparing their history and legends, and laughing over the silliest traditions. They were both crazy about history and could pull the stories right from their memories. I was happy to see Mom finally taking it easy at least for a few hours. Friday would be our day to pull everything together and finish up all the details.

When Kyle didn't come back out I went to see if everything was alright. I found him sitting on the side of the bed holding an ice pack to Akiak's head. When Kyle looked up at me he seemed almost angry as well as concerned. "You know, I almost forgot about the fever it's been so long ago."

"I remember." I looked at him and smiled sadly. I don't even know who changed first, me or Seth, but Mom thought we had the flu and she was running back and forth to check on us both! When she called around to see if anyone else was sick Sam came right over and figured out what was really happening. If I hadn't been running such a high fever he wouldn't have believed that I was affected too. He took us for a walk in the woods and by morning we knew what we were."

"Okay, that sounds like a plan. You stay here Leah, let your mom know in some private way what's going on and I'll take Akiak outside so he doesn't destroy Seth's room. And keep an eye on the lovebirds for me too, okay?" He seemed more worried than I'd ever seen him as he sat a confused seventeen year old boy up in bed.

"Are you sure that's what this is? I mean he could just have the flu." I was trying to hold out hope that this was all normal.

"He pegged the thermometer at a hundred and eight point nine, and that's as high as it goes! Come on Akiak, let's go for a little walk." He pulled him up and he leaned heavily on Kyle. "Don't worry, you can leave your shoes here for now." They headed for the back door and I went back into the living room

"Seth, why don't you come over here and tell Lora all about the Quileutte school while I talk to Mom about something that I forgot about the wedding!" She hurried to my side as soon as she saw the look in my eyes. We slipped off to my room and I closed the door and explained to her what was going on with Akiak. While I had her attention I dropped the bomb about Seth imprinting on Ahnah and she sat down on my bed, hard. "Kyle's taking him out for a walk so he doesn't hurt anyone when it happens. We've also had a chance to talk to the kids about their future."

"I knew something was up with those two! Oh Leah, why can't your father be here!" She looked like she was overwhelmed and I sat next to her and put my arms around her shoulders.

"It's going to work out Mom. I mean for so long I thought that being like this was a curse, but now I see it's just being who I was always meant to be! And I'm getting the best man in the world for a husband because of the imprinting curse! Lora has a lot to learn, but it seems she's found a good friend to help her through it. Now we should get back in there and make sure Seth and Ahnah don't sneak off to be alone!" We stood up and I heard a strange howling off in the distance. We both looked at each other. "I guess it wasn't the flu."

I took Ahnah and Seth to the kitchen while Mom sat back down to talk with Lora. I didn't know if she would tell her everything tonight, or wait until morning. I decided to tell Seth and Ahnah about Akiak so they would be able to help Lora when she heard the whole story. I couldn't tell who was more confused, Seth because it was one more who wasn't a member of our tribe; or Ahnah since it was her own brother and she'd only just learned of the existence of shape shifters. "Am I going to change too Leah?" I didn't know how to answer her question since I didn't know why I changed. What surprised me was that she didn't seem worried; she just wanted to know what to expect.

"I wish I could tell you, but unless you feel feverish I'd have to say at least not right now. I think we should all go get ready for bed. No matter what happens tonight, tomorrow's going to be a big day. And Saturday is going to be crazy." I smiled at the thought of Saturday even though our situations were crazy already.

With Ahnah tucked into my bed and Seth in his, I checked on our moms. They were on the couch deep in a serious discussion and I knew the truth was coming out tonight. I slipped in and sat on the hearth and Lora seemed distracted by me. "Did you know this was going to happen?" She looked at me and I felt a sense of guilt even though I didn't do anything to deserve it.

"I didn't know when I invited you to the wedding. I just wanted Kyle to have someone here for him." I smiled. "I am happy that you haven't turned your back on him. He didn't ask for what happened to him; none of us did. We've only been dealing with this ….issue for a couple years, and aside from legends and stories passed down, we have very few ideas how everything works. Kyle guessed what happened to Seth and how he ….fell for Ahnah. He's sensitive to that connection since he feels the same for me. Once it happens it's too late to prevent it; like lightning striking. And as far as Akiak's change, I was worried when I saw him eating so much....but I don't know him well enough to know what's normal for him. He also seems like he's grown a few inches since I last saw him, so it was on my mind. But again, once the change starts we don't know how to stop it. I can tell you for myself, I'm glad no one could stop it; I'm very happy the way my life is turning out. I can also tell you there are about sixteen others just like me and Seth who are proud of their ability and wouldn't change a thing....well, maybe that's only fifteen since the first one had to go through this all alone."

Lora looked like any mother would when faced with the unknown. "So you think my children will be okay?" I saw all the hope and fear looking out from her eyes and I smiled.

"They're not just going to be okay, they're going to be better than okay. It's not always going to be easy for them, but this is a good thing!" I heard that strange howling outside and I could feel the hair on the back of my neck stand up. "I think I'd like to go see if Kyle needs any help." I stood up and headed for the door.

"Can I come with you Leah?" Lora stood up suddenly. I need to see for myself how it happens.

"Sure, but let me run back and change clothes first; you'll understand better if you can see the whole thing." I ran to my room and pulled out something I didn't care to wear again and put it on. I carried my other clothes with me as I stepped into the hall wearing a mini-dress and not much else.

"You're going out in _that_?" She looked a little surprised at what I had on. "It's freezing outside won't you get cold?"

I grinned. "I've got so many outfits like this from my wilder teenage years. Trust me, this isn't coming back after I change. We have a tendency to shred whatever we're wearing; but there are some exceptions. And you'll notice we tend to be much warmer than normal now. Akiak won't need his coat as much as before; he may even want to sleep with the window open. Are you ready to go yet?" She put on her coat and I lead her outside and beyond the shed. I advised her to stay out of the way. "Don't be scared, it only looks painful." I changed as gently as I could and stood for a minute so she could see me clearly, then I ran into the woods picking up Kyle's scent almost immediately.

"Leah, be careful out here, Akiak is still a little disoriented." I could hear Kyle in my head and I knew where to find him even in the dark. I ran with all the speed of the wolf and heard again the strange howling, closer than I expected. I caught my first glimpse of the newest shape shifter as he bolted over a hill and disappeared. At first I thought it was a wolf, but something wasn't quite right. I joined Kyle where he was following Akiak's trail at bear speed through the woods. "Leah, his change is somewhere between my first and your first. He's a wolf/husky mix! I know there's a few back in the village that raise them; it's the most intimate animal he knows! Can you hear him? He's trying to learn what he can do, and he's apparently in our pack. It might be good if you could run with him and show him how to....be a wolf."

"But I'm not a wolf uncle Kyle!" I heard the exhilaration and giddiness in his thoughts. I saw where he was through his eyes and I ran that way.

"Akiak, it doesn't matter if you're only half wolf, there are some things that are the same. I'm coming to you and we're going to do a little tracking, and maybe a little hunting." I thought he would wait for me, but he was all over the woods, checking scents disturbing ground burrows and not paying attention to where he was going. When I finally caught up to him he tried at first to outrun me; which he wasn't able to do. "Akiak, calm down and stay with me. Can you smell the trail? You need to think; there are still dangers out here no matter how big you are!" I had to chase after him again as he bounded off after a rabbit he'd dug out of it's burrow. "Akiak! Your going to be sorry if you scare up a skunk! Calm down and stay with me!

When I heard Kyle again it was the alpha voice. It was stunning in it's power even though it wasn't directed at me. I saw the young half wolf come scooting back my way with his tail tucked and I came along side him as we ran together. "Everything has a scent. You'll learn to follow not only the thing you're chasing, but you'll become aware of what else is out and about. You need to stay close to me; there's another of my old pack out in the woods, and he doesn't know you. We ran, eventually picking up the scent of a herd of deer. "You'll need to learn to hunt and eat what you kill. There's a reason for your change and it's not just so you can play." I heard Sam's advice coming easily to mind as I tried to teach the new one. "You need to learn to be a guardian to your pack and your people. Sometimes that might mean staying out in the wild for a long time." We hunted the herd and as soon as he calmed down he was able to listen to my directions. He was the decoy that drove the herd my way and I easily took down a deer.

I expected Akiak to be right with me, but he ran off chasing a large buck through the woods. I made my kill then abandoned the deer to chase after him again. I caught up to him just in time to see a huge russet wolf barrel into him, knocking him back hard. Akiak barely made it back to his feet before the wolf was snapping and snarling at him, walking toward him stiff legged with the fur standing out from his body. The smaller animal backed toward me still not ready to give up the challenge. "Back away Akiak." I whispered in his head. "This isn't a challenge you can win. Don't look directly at him and come my way." I could feel the fear coming from him and I stepped between him and the other wolf to allow his retreat. "Go back toward Kyle, I've got your back." He didn't take much convincing before he turned tail and ran. I could hear his thoughts screaming about the massive werewolf he'd been attacked by. I walked over and greeted Jacob in the way of wolves. It seemed strange not to be able to hear him in my head, but I could see the wolf smile on his face and knew he didn't intend any harm to Akiak. I woofed softly at him then turned to head back to my new pack.

I caught up to them both where I'd left the deer. Kyle was trying to show him how to eat in his new form. I could see Akiak had some of the same inhibitions as I had once had. Eating something raw, warm, and bloody was just not what he wanted to do. "Akiak, just give yourself fully to the animal you've become. Don't think it, just do it. It's a choice how much of yourself you allow to become like the animal. To eat, you need to become more fully the animal." Kyle had already devoured half the deer and I encouraged Akiak to do what he needed to learn.

He took his first nibble of the deer, but Kyle snatched it and walked away from him, then sat down to gnaw on it a bit more. Akiak went after him, but as soon as he took another bite Kyle repeated his game of keep away. It happened three or four times that way until I could tell Akiak was getting angry. On his last attempt he grabbed hold of the deer and didn't let go, growling and snarling he claimed his part of the kill and tore into the animal just like a wolf. Kyle let it go and Akiak continued to eat. Any time he seemed repulsed Kyle would try again to grab it from him. I sat back and watched, amazed at how easily Kyle had gotten him past his squeamishness.

As Akiak settled down he finished off the deer, still with the appetite of a teenager. Kyle came to stand by me and if anyone would have been watching they would have seen the strange sight of an enormous bear licking the muzzle of a huge wolf. I thought to him, "How do you feel about taking him to visit the other supernatural creatures? It's possible he could run into some of them any time he's hunting."

Akiak perked up, "What do you mean _other_ supernatural creatures? You mean there's more than just us and that werewolf?" I could hear Kyle laughing in my head.

"We can go, but you _must _stay with us and stay calm. On the way, I want you to tell me what you smell and how it feels. Every scent can tell you something and you need to be aware that your nose is more important than your eyes. And even more than your nose, your instinct can save your life." We walked along, taking our time and listening to Akiak tell us about every smell, every trail and every sensation he came across. At one point his hackles rose and he slowed; communicating to Kyle something wasn't right. I smelled him long before Akiak noticed, but I was glad to see his caution. Jacob came out of the trees, and fell in beside Kyle on his left with me on the right. Akiak seemed confused until I let him know that he was a friend.

At the boundary line I could see Jacob pause, obviously put off by the smell. Akiak slowed down as well, letting us know that he sensed a difference but he had never smelled anything like it before. I noticed too, but I could have missed it entirely if I didn't know what to look for. "Stay alert Akiak, there could be predators in these woods that would make a meal of you as easily as you did the deer." I was trying to be serious, but Kyle's laughter in my head was accompanied by the image of him sitting on Emmett and squishing him flat. I sent back an image of the Volturi, and the fear on the Cullen family's faces. I could feel Akiak's confusion at our thoughts.

Jacob picked up speed once we crossed the boundary and Kyle raced to keep up, with me by his side. Before we were close to the house Jacob howled into the night. I thought it appropriate so I did too, and Akiak followed my lead. Kyle laughed mentally and his loud roar put us all to shame. As the house came in sight Akiak was again describing the smells. "Something feels very strange here. I wouldn't come here if you didn't say it was alright. I would circle wide around this place!" He followed after us slowly and as we came up through the yard I could see them out on the porch. Jacob circled around the house at a run and came back around changed and dressed. He locked eyes onto Akiak and made sure he knew just who he was, then ruffled the fur between his ears. Jacob then jumped lightly to the porch to scoop up Nessie who had her arms out waiting for him. Bella and Edward sat side by side like two statues carved from stone. When they moved I could feel how startled Akiak was. In minutes the door opened up and Emmett and Rosalie came out. Akiak slipped behind us both as Emmett ran our way. He gained speed and rushed Kyle, grabbing him around the middle and tackling him to the ground. Akiak yelped and dodged out of the way and Kyle's laughter was the only thing that kept him from fleeing into the woods.

Rosalie followed Emmett and grabbed him by his collar and pulled him physically off of Kyle. "That's enough of that! You're not going to make a mud pit out of the lawn! Kyle stayed where he landed and Rosalie unfolded a blanket and tossed it over the bear, almost covering him completely. I laid down on the grass and she came my way and did the same, then she grinned and rearranged the blanket to cover my tail. Akiak stayed planted, guarding the space where he stood as she came toward him.

"Just give him a minute please, Rosalie." Kyle was himself, standing up and wrapping the blanket around him. He stepped over to Akiak and squatted on the ground in front of him. "They are not what they seem, but they are our friends and you will be safe here as long as you're not aggressive toward them. If you want to change back I can introduce you, or you can stay as you are."

I still hadn't changed myself so I could hear his thoughts. He felt safer as an animal than as a teenage boy, and he wanted to wait and see. When I changed I told Kyle what he was thinking. He introduced our newest shape shifter and Jacob seemed surprised. "That's two now from your family; we need to look up your tribe and trace their roots. " Renesmee reached up and laid her hand against his face and he smiled at the pictures she showed him. "She wants to pet the dog. That's okay right?" She didn't wait for permission, but climbed down from her perch as Jacob reluctantly let her go. We all waited as she stepped lightly over to Akiak. Kyle and I both had a hand on him and as he watched her his tail started to wag. She smiled brightly up at him and reached her small arms up to him.

Akiak laid down and she happily threw her arms around the 'dog' and hugged her face to his. Akiak's tail curled like a husky and it was swishing a wide path as Nessie made friends. When she laid her hands on his face we all caught our breath wondering what pictures she was showing him. I looked to Edward who smiled slowly until he was almost laughing with his arm around his wife. "She's quite the historian. She just introduced herself and the whole family to him. She showed him all about us easier than we could have explained it."

When she let go of him he actually licked her face and she laughed sweetly before she turned and launched herself into Jacob's arms again. Akiak inched closer to the rest of us gathered on the porch and Kyle asked him if he was ready to change back. He woofed and wagged his tail and Rosalie tossed a blanket over him. I turned away to allow him the privacy I'd rarely had in the old pack. The night was calm and cold, but no one seemed to care as we sat on the porch talking about the newest shape shifter, and how Seth imprinted on Ahnah. When we mentioned that we had to explain just what that was all about to Akiak since he had missed the first drama. Jacob was embarrassed that Nessie was listening to Kyle's explanation like she understood. We left out the part about Jacob imprinting on Nessie.

"So what time can we expect you tomorrow?" Emmett sat down next to Kyle on the edge of the porch and threw his arm around my fiance's shoulder. "If you're getting married you at least need to have a bachelor party!" Rosalie groaned, and I tried not to giggle. I couldn't imagine what that would look like since all the traditional vice was not an option for Kyle; and the Cullen's too for that matter. He wasn't interested at all in looking at other women, he didn't drink so he wouldn't lose control of his ability, and he didn't have a lot of male friends to carouse with. But maybe that's what Emmett was getting at; a male bonding experience.

"How about you come by at sunset and we'll see what kind of trouble we can get into! And bring any of the pups that want to come too. Let em know to bring their old comfortable clothes their wives, girlfriends, and other women in their lives won't let them wear. We'll start off with a little hunting then come back and play a little poker. Edward will of course have to sit out, and if it gets too dull, we can …." He glanced up at Rosalie and smirked. "....find something else to get into! I'm serious, if you don't come, you'll force us to drive to La Push and ruin a lot of good peace keeping to kidnap you! I already know Jacob will be here, but you need to decide who you want and get the men together.

Kyle looked my way for a rescue, but I smiled and shrugged. Of all the people I thought he would make friends with, I never thought it would be Emmett. I seemed to remember someone mentioning that he'd been mauled by a bear before he was changed, so it seemed even more unlikely. But I wasn't going to stand in the way of a friendship since Kyle had been without any close friends for way too long. "I think it's a great idea." I stunned Rosalie with my statement. "My only concern isn't what you'll get up to, but how long it will take. It's Thursday and it's already late. I don't know how much sleep we'll get tonight once we get back home. Tomorrow we have a whole mess of problems to sort through as well as wedding preparation. If you have a bachelor party and stay out late you'll be very tired on Saturday." I smiled sweetly. "I don't know about you, but I plan on getting married at noon. Then there's this reception thing we have planned. I'm not sure how long that will last, but sometime afterward someone promised me a honeymoon. " I looked up at him and played my ace. "I'm not sure if you plan on flying us to wherever that will be, but if you do you'll need some rest ahead of time. Because I _guarantee _there won't be much time for rest when we arrive!" I heard the lightest of vampire chuckles at the last statement and Jacob covered Nessie's ears.

Kyle looked from me to Emmett. "You heard from the boss, I guess we'll just have to forget about it! Spending time with a bunch of stinky guys isn't worth risking my honeymoon over!"

"I'm not ready to concede defeat yet. How about this plan....you tell the guys to show up here at sundown; make that six just in case there's some disagreement about when that is. We'll have six hours of man time, then we'll call it a night at midnight and send all the pups home. You stay here with us so you can observe that age old tradition of not seeing the bride before the wedding. We'll take you to your wedding ourselves and you can see each other for the first time as soon as she walks down the aisle!"

I was about to try to come up with some kind of protest since the idea of him spending so much time away from me was more than I wanted to deal with, but I didn't get the chance. "That sounds like a lovely idea!" It was Rosalie's delighted voice that preempted my protest as she floated over and sat delicately next to Emmett. "I think it sounds sweet to keep the bride and groom apart! Such traditions are lost these days, but it was so much nicer when there was an element of anticipation that came along with a wedding! I can remember that notes were passed between brides and grooms because they weren't permitted to see one another and many brides kept the notes as long as they lived." She looked at me expectantly. "Oh Leah, you've got to agree! I promise I'll make sure the party ends on time myself! Not only will we make sure he's on time, but he'll be dressed and ready with time to spare. Come on Leah, you won't regret it!"

Just one.... if just one blond joke had come to mind I might have been able to resist, but I was bowled over by her enthusiasm, which I knew was a rare thing from all the time I'd spent at the Cullens'. "I don't tell Kyle what to do, so if he wants to agree then I have no problem; bachelor party and sleep over are unopposed." She hugged her husband like it was a done deal and since Kyle didn't protest, it soon was. Jacob agreed to invite the wolves of both packs but he also thought many of them wouldn't come.

"I want to come." Akiak spoke up for the first time since changing back. He seemed so earnest it was hard to believe he was only seventeen. "I saw what was happening between Seth and Ahnah right from the beginning, and I don't want to hang around watching that for one minute longer than I have to! The only good thing is he's not under your leadership Uncle Kyle; listening to _your _thoughts about Leah are bad enough!" That got a laugh from everyone and I was pleased that it was intentional; Akiak had a good sense of humor.

Kyle looked at his nephew and asked with a grin, "So what does she think about me?"

"Oh, she's a lot more reserved than you are. I got the feeling she was used to guarding her thoughts....but you just gush like a schoolboy with is first crush!" There were more laughs at that.

"Now wait a minute; talk about uncomfortable thoughts, I seem to remember someone running in terror from a vicious werewolf! I didn't think it was possible to tuck that curly tail of yours, but you did it!" I could see Akiak was embarrassed and I wanted to say something but Jacob beat me to it.

"You know that was me. I'd been watching you crashing through the woods for a while and you didn't even pick up my scent. I knew Leah was trying to help you control yourself, but you weren't listening to her. I couldn't hear what you were thinking, but I know what kind of training Leah has had. We've all had to learn discipline, it's the only thing that keeps us alive when we face real enemies. I was just giving you a little wake up call." He smiled his white smile and Akiak smiled back. "Ask Seth or Leah about newborn vampires some day. Or when you meet Sam Uley take a look at his pretty wife. It's critical that you learn self control and discipline; listen to Kyle, he'll teach you. He's been changing longer than any of us and he has more control than the rest of us." I was surprised to hear Jacob speak about Kyle with such admiration. A lot must have changed in the last couple days. He continued with a grin, "But then again he's so much _older _than the rest of us, so if he's having a schoolboy crush, maybe we need to keep the old man away from her!"

I heard Bella laugh behind me as she kissed her husband knowingly. Jacob smiled again as he tickled Nessie affectionately and winked at me. Obviously age didn't matter much to supernatural people. Soon Bella and Edward got up and gently took Nessie away from Jacob. "It's her bedtime now. We're glad to meet you Akiak; you're welcome to visit whenever you like and please do come to the party." Bella spoke for them both and she reminded me of Esme at the moment. I hated to admit it, but being vamped seemed to be good for her. They left the porch and walked toward the river barely seeming to touch the ground. Akiak watched them go and his eyes grew wide as they effortlessly jumped the river.

"How do you get used to everything?" He looked at both of us in wonder and confusion. "Are there any other....supernatural things I need to learn about?"

"Well, there are the real werewolves!" Emmett grinned, "but even we haven't seen any; I'm told they're near extinct. There are a few more like Nessie, and then there are likely newborn vampires; they're meaner and stronger than those of us who are older. Most vampires would kill and maybe even drain you if they were really thirsty. Our diet is different, we only hunt animals but it's still a temptation. That's the reason Jasper and Alice didn't come out this evening; we planned on hunting tomorrow so the wedding won't be a problem for us. He's starting to feel the edge and we didn't think it was a good idea to have him so close to an unpredictable new shape shifter."

"So, he stayed away from me because....he was afraid of..." Akiak was trying to work his way through it when Emmett burst out laughing.

"He's not afraid of _you_ pup! He's afraid of how upset everyone would get if he couldn't resist feeding on you! He's just a little too thirsty for pleasant company, and you three aren't covered under the treaty, so you're not repulsive! The only thing to fear from you is that you might put up enough of a fight he could get blood on his shirt!" I heard Kyle growl a warning low in his throat and Emmett looked his way with his piercing dark golden stare. "Oh calm yourself, I'm not going to hurt the pup! But he needs to understand what the other packs already know; we're dangerous killers. It's only a choice of restraint that keeps us from ripping your throat out just to see what you taste like! Just like an alcoholic can drink water for their whole life, it only takes one slip to cause a _lot _of damage! Just be glad that Jasper has decided to lock himself away from the liquor cabinet!"

He smiled then, suddenly bright and pleasant. "Tomorrow at six. I think we should call it a night; my bride is getting irritated with me. She doesn't like being referred to as a bloodthirsty killer _or _an alcoholic." In the blink of an eye they stood and waved goodbye as they stepped into the house leaving the four of us alone.

"What was that he said about the treaty?" Jacob wanted to know the details, so I explained it as best I understood it. He looked thoughtful.

"So, if the treaty is voided then the aversion scents go away? The boundary won't be a barrier anymore? And just by leaving the pack you're no longer covered? Leah, you at least should always be covered, just because of your lineage."

"No Jacob, I chose to be with Kyle. By the standards of the treaty, I'm not only in a different pack, but a different tribe. It makes sense that a wife would go with her husband, even if that is a bit old-fashioned. I'd love to see what happens down the road when Renesmee comes of age if the treaty is still in place." I could see he wasn't finished wrestling with the concepts at work in the treaty.

"So you don't smell bad to them anymore? And they don't stink?" He looked at me like I'd told him the moon was made of green cheese.

"I don't smell them much at all. I can smell what's layered around them, like perfume, shampoo, and new clothes. And if I'm very close I can smell what Bella was always talking about; a kind of sweet pheromone. But mostly it's nothing. It's a little scary since I could be standing in the middle of a coven and not know it; except by the absence of human smell. I think Akiak picked up on that when we got here. He said he wouldn't come near the place if we didn't say it was okay for him. On their side they think we smell great. Rosalie said Kyle reminded her of 'eating apple dumplings on the front porch swing.' And Jasper said I smelled 'heavenly, like magnolia blossoms and fresh oranges.'" I smiled at the memory and Kyle pulled me closer to him.

"Alice said there was something about us that was a little odd, and it would make them not want to seek us out unless they were truly thirsty and there were no other choices. She compared it to cookies made with saccharine. I got the feeling she thought we would be nutritious, but not delicious." I saw Jacob grin at that.

"And that's if we didn't put up so much of a fight to make the meal too much trouble! I think I'm ready to change and get out of here. Leah, do you mind?" He made a little turning motion with his fingers and I turned my back on him. I didn't see him, but I felt his change and turned back to see him racing off through the woods.

Akiak watched him go, wide-eyed. "He's so fast! And impressive...."

"Yes he is. It's my guess that it won't be too long before he's the leader; not only of the whole pack but maybe the tribe as well." We watched him disappear, then Kyle kissed me.

"How about we both go next, and you can change and catch up to us." Kyle smiled and I nodded, stepping up onto the porch. I curled up and pulled the blanket over me and concentrated on changing as gently as possible. Now that I wasn't so angry and bitter all the time I was trying hard to control the violence of my changing. It took more thought and concentration rather than the strong emotion, but I was seeing some positive results. I was pleased when I poked my wolf head out from under the blanket, which hadn't shredded. I leaped off the porch leaving the blanket fluttering behind me, and took off after Kyle and Akiak. They were easy to follow since they were running straight home, and I realized Kyle had chosen his wolf form. I could hear Akiak questioning him about how to choose a different animal and I tried to stay quiet and let Kyle teach. It was easier to guard my thoughts, by simply tuning in to the animal senses. The feel of the wind and the scents it brought were more than enough to keep my mind busy. I only wished I'd learned that sooner. Once we made it back home I changed and dressed to slip back inside.

It was early morning, but Mom and Lora were still awake and sitting at the kitchen table drinking coffee. "Mom, you need to get some sleep! You're going to be a wreck tomorrow!" I was whispering to keep from waking Ahnah and Seth.

"You should talk! You do remember your getting married in two....make that one day?! You can't be running around all night long!" She scolded me and I hugged her and kissed her cheek.

"I just thought you'd like to know that Akiak is fine." I grinned. "He doesn't quite change into a wolf....he changes into a wolf/husky mix. I think it's funny since Kyle actually transformed into a sled dog the first time too! Now he prefers the bear. You don't need to worry Lora, he's learning what he needs to know, and Kyle's probably only going to be a little while longer before they come in."

"Will he be....an animal?" I could see her trying to prepare herself for what her son had become.

"No, he'll be himself. He may need some clothes depending on how quickly he changed, but you won't be able to tell the difference....except he may hit a growth spurt. They – we usually start before the change, and grow quickly after the first time.

"Oh my....does it hurt?" She looked scared for her son.

"I don't remember any pain, but I think there was some discomfort in getting used to it. Like learning to drive a stick shift can be hard on the transmission." I smiled and she seemed relieved. I was about to head off to my room when Mom got my attention.

"Leah, I wanted to show you something if you're not too tired." I was tired, but I knew how important it was to her if she would keep me up later. I pulled up a chair and looked at the papers she'd been doodling on.

"Lora and I were just trying to figure out what's going on with all these changes. I mean if we can trace it back to the three leaders; Black, Ateara, and Uley, then why so long since it happens again? It's easy to dismiss an old legend until part of it comes true. But what got us thinking was actually Embry Coll. I was wondering if any of Lora's brothers could have....met his mother. Then we got to thinking about how difficult it is to trace the purity of a family line. Especially when you take into account no written records and no genetic testing. So I pulled out my old family tree and started to look to see if there were any that were unaccounted for; any distant relatives that might have left to go further north and weren't heard from again. That's when I noticed this."

She turned the page to show me and I stared without seeing what she wanted me to see. "Leah, they didn't trace lineage through women; only men! It's always been in the back of everyone's mind that Embry's father was cheating on his wife. But that's because we never expected there were more shape shifters outside of our tribe, and they didn't trace lineage through the women! Because only the sons; the warriors were counted, you can imagine that there were just as many uncounted female children born! Leah, you and Seth can trace your lineage back to Ephraim Black through your father, but if you look here," she pointed at one name on the page, "My grandmother was briefly married to Levi Uley's brother! It's not told that he shape shifted, only that he left the pack, and abandoned my grandmother. My father was born not long after she married Grandpa....you have to look closely at the dates, see? "

I had to do the math and realized that either Grandpa was premature at seven months, or Grandma was pregnant before they got married! "Leah, don't you see? My dad was a Uley! You and Seth get this from _both _sides of the family! It explains so much for you Leah! Why you are the only woman to change? Why did Sam not imprint on you? You have the trait from both your father _and _your mother, Leah! And you are close enough related to Sam that whatever it is that causes the change rejected you because of your family ties to him! You're already third cousins if I've got it right! All this time you've been worried that you can change because you're flawed in some way, but you're not, you just have too much of whatever it is, in you to _not _ change!"

I was trying hard to follow what she was saying and I still didn't see why it would make a difference if I had shape shifter blood from both sides of my family. It seemed impossible that in all the generations past, I was the only one.

"Honey, don't you see? There's nothing wrong with you! You're not menopausal or deformed. You should have no problems becoming a mother when you and Kyle decide you want to start a family. And unless I missed my guess, your children will have your ability; whether they're girls or boys!" She looked startled for a second and looked at Lora. "And if Seth and Ahnah get married and have children...._they're _children will have it from both parents too! Leah, how likely is it that all this happened accidentally?"

"I could have told you there was no accident at all." Kyle leaned in the doorway so quiet we hadn't even noticed him. I jumped up and hurried to put my arms around him.

"How long have you been there? We didn't even hear you come in! Is Akiak alright?" I looked up into his serious face.

"He's fine, he's getting ready for bed in Seth's room. We just got back a few minutes ago; he's pretty tired." He looked at the three of us. "So, you're starting to figure out that this....supernatural trait has a mind of it's own? I could have told you that! I'm not just being romantic when I tell you I've waited for her for half my life! I've had a chance to see so many of the 'imprinted' males of your tribe, and it's definitely _not_ accidental! There's so much about this I used to think I understood, but with Leah's help I'm realizing that we've only just scratched the surface of what it really is! She's so intuitive about how it works and who she is; it makes perfect sense that she has twice what most of us have! There seems to be almost a sort of primal intelligence at work here." He smiled down at me. "And you thought I wasn't listening when I was teaching Akiak!"

Akiak came in to reassure his mother that he was alright. She stood up to hug him and he was already taller than he was at dinner. His pajamas were a couple inches too short in the legs and arms and she looked at me and Kyle and shook her head. "I don't know how I'm going to explain to his father that his youngest son is going to need all new clothes!"

He stretched then, lengthening the distance between his wrists and the cuffs of his shirt, and laughed. "Cool!" He looked down at his mom and smiled. "I know you're worried about me, but _I'm _loving this! And don't worry about the new clothes, I'll get a job this summer. I've got a lot to look forward to! He yawned and rubbed his eyes. "I think I need to get some sleep. I hope Seth doesn't snore." He hugged his mom, said 'good night' and slipped off to bed.

**a/n: I hope you enjoy the revelations about shape shifters. I had a great time dreaming it up and there are still more secrets to be revealed! Please keep reading and don't be afraid to comment; I'm a sucker for reviews, even bad ones. I've slowed down my updating since I can see the end in sight and....I don't want it to end!**


	12. Chapter 12 Anticipation

Chapter 12.

Anticipation

Mom and Lora said goodnight and Mom started cleaning up the papers on the table. "I'm ready for bed too. We just had to wait up and make sure all the ….little animals made it home safe!" They both laughed at the feeble joke. I helped clean up the kitchen and the moms headed off to bed. I sat in the living room with Kyle, just enjoying the quiet peacefulness next to the fire.

"Do you realize this is the last night we'll have together before we're married?" I looked up at him and smiled, enjoying the feel of his arms around me.

He smiled down at me. "Do you realize after Saturday you'll be stuck with me every night."

I held him tighter. "Do you realize that I wouldn't have it any other way!"

"Tikaani....!" He pulled me close and kissed me. "Do you know my people have thirty-four different words for snow? And yet there is only one word for love. How is it that there are just not enough words to describe how I feel for you?"

I sat with him for a while, with my head on his chest just listening to his heartbeat; breathing his warm scent. I finally reluctantly peeled myself away from him to go to bed. Mom was still awake and I climbed into bed next to her, feeling like a child one last time.

"Leah....In case I forgot to tell you, I'm very proud of you!" I couldn't see her in the dark, but I'd known she would be restless. "I was very worried about you for quite a while, especially through all the mess with Sam, but it seems you've turned things around. I'm going to miss you like crazy when you move away. Especially now that I know that Seth is going to want to be in Alaska more than anything else.

"You know you'll always be welcome. And I'll be able to visit more than you think; Kyle wants me to learn to fly. He's a good teacher, and something tells me we're going to be making the trip down here quite often."

"I know, but it's still going to be hard losing you both so soon after your dad. I never expected to have a totally empty nest, at least not so soon."

"Well, if I didn't miss my guess, Chief Swan might have a little bit to say about your 'nest.' He seemed a little bit more than just protective of you the last time he was here. And you seem to be spending a lot of time in Forks...."

"That doesn't bother you? It still seems so soon after your father....I've been worried what people will think. They were such close friends, we _all _were. It feels good to be needed again."

"It doesn't bother me Mom. Dad would want you to be happy; he kept insisting that I forget about Sam and go find someone else to make me happy; and he _liked _Sam! Charley Swan's a good man, even if he did let Bella walk all over him."  
"Are you ever going to get over being mad at her?"

"Um, yeah, I'm really over It already. I used to hate that she had a choice to be normal, and I never did. Not to mention what she was doing to poor Jacob." I thought for a bit. "If I had had the same choice to make between being normal and being with Kyle, I would have done the same thing! And I wouldn't have even considered it a choice; except maybe one between life and death." She was quiet.

"I hope you'll be happy Leah. This imprinting bond....it's not been tested really. The legends of it come from a time when marriage was the end, not the beginning. No one ever tells what happens after 'they lived happily ever after.' Where are the story tellers when she gets old and fat and he gets drunk and hangs out with the guys? I hope you two can weather the storms. He seems like a good man even though your daddy might not have liked him as much as he did Sam. He told me he hates hunting and fishing....at least in the traditional sense. But then again Harry would have loved him as long as he treated his baby girl right." I felt her finally drift off to sleep, and I laid awake a little longer thinking about all the amazing things that had happened since meeting Kyle. I don't even remember when I closed my eyes.

Morning came too soon and I woke to Mom's alarm clock at six a.m. I wanted to go back to sleep, but there was breakfast to be made for guests and a pack of hungry shape shifters. There were many little things still to do, but Mom seemed to have it all in hand. I was starting to see that she'd delegated a lot more of the work than I'd thought. The community center was modestly decorated . The wedding cake would be delivered from Forks. The food was covered....everything was set. Kyle went outside with Akiak and Seth as soon as breakfast was finished. Ahnah made sure there was nothing we would need her for, then she eagerly followed Seth outside.

I took a little time to pack up for the honeymoon since I didn't know where I was going or what I would need. I was happy I'd been able to shop for some more conservative clothes since most of my old wardrobe belonged to Sam's ex. I wanted to move forward as Kyle's bride. In the back of my closet I ran across some of the things Bella had given me and I smiled. I remembered accepting them thinking that it would irritate Alice, but as I looked at them I could see that it was possible that Alice had actually chosen them for me; with her being able to see the future and all. I pulled them out and clipped the tags off. They might be needed on my honeymoon since they were too fancy for anything but special occasions.

I took another look at Mom's – my wedding gown hanging on the inside of the closet door. It was prettier than I could have imagined and I couldn't wait for Kyle to see me in it. There was a tap on the door and Mom let me know I had company.

Emily was waiting in the living room and she smiled and told me we had someplace to go. She didn't give me time to come up with any excuses, but took my hand and pulled me outside to her car. She drove me to her house and the cars in front told me something was going on. Inside there was a surprise bridal shower for me and I saw so many of the young women from the tribe gathered. It didn't take me long to discover that it wasn't just any kind of shower, but a lingerie shower. "We didn't think you'd need housewares since Kyle already has a home, but you might need something to keep you warm on those cold Alaskan nights." Emily laughed as I opened up the first gift, which wouldn't keep anything warm by any stretch of the imagination.

"You've got to be kidding me!" I held up the naughty little scraps of satin and lace and the women all laughed.

"Well....we could have bought you cotton, wool, fleece, and flannel to snuggle up in. But instead we thought you might be more inclined to snuggle up with a seven foot tall, overheated, Inuit male!" Emily was laughing and I felt my skin flushing as all the ladies joined in. I quickly folded the satin and lace and set it aside. But the next one was just as bad and the laughter started all over again when I was still embarrassed. Little by little I got over it so long as no one reminded me that Kyle might soon see me in one of the frilly little nothing outfits. Considering all the presents I had to open, in the end the stack of gifts didn't weigh much more than a sack lunch. The party was fun with some goofy games played with toilet paper and another that had women guessing how many children we would have and when they'd start to arrive.

Between the gifts, food, games, and socializing, the party took three hours! When Emily drove me back home it was noon. Twenty-four hours until I would marry Kyle! I helped Mom and Lora prepare a large lunch of soup and sandwiches. I had to ask Lora about the fish soup her mother made and she scratched out the recipe and instructions for me. "I can't believe he said he liked that! We all used to complain about it since we had it so often." I didn't know where everyone had gone off to, but as soon as the food was ready they intuitively showed up.

In minutes the food was almost gone and I was able to sit with Kyle while he ate. He told me that Seth and Akiak were practicing their changing. Akiak had learned how to become either a wolf or a husky instead of just the mix. Ahnah had actually ridden on Seth's back in his wolf form since they were trying to find some eagles or hawks to study. She seemed to be totally accepting of his ability and she was even hoping that their children would be able to do it! I wanted to go out and play with them, but every time I had a free moment Mom would come up with some other wedding detail to work out. I had no idea what a bride was supposed to do the day before her wedding. I had so many things being done by Mom and her friends that there were only small details to contend with. I imagined others might spend time getting manicures and having their hair done. But I could wreck a manicure with one change, and the same was true of my hair. I hadn't planned to do much with it since we were going to be outside and the wind would likely undo anything I did.

At five Kyle came in to spend the last time with me that I would have before I saw him at the wedding. I really didn't want him to go and I was having second thoughts about the bachelor party. "Just be careful. You put that many supernatural people together and you could easily get trouble." When I kissed him goodbye I smiled and reminded him that his hours were numbered.

"I would much rather spend my time here with you. But we should probably do things by the book since we're only going to do this once. Not to mention we do so many other things different than most. The plan was to take the truck so that anyone who wanted to could ride along. It would also mean that Kyle would have a way to get to the wedding without having to change and run through the woods. I was surprised to see Seth going along, then reminded myself he was seventeen and likely to get married soon himself. At 5:30 they headed out, but not before Seth and Ahnah held each other and kissed as if they'd never see each other again. I resisted the urge to cling to Kyle in the same way, sending him off with a light kiss and a smile.

Eighteen hours. Too long to wait to see him. I wanted it done and over with so we could leave on our honeymoon and be alone for the two weeks he'd planned. I was surprised that once everyone had gone, Mom didn't have any more details for me to check on. I sat and wrote down a checklist of everything I would need to do before the wedding and a few things to do afterward. As I sat and thought I remembered Rosalie's sentiments about writing letters when you couldn't see each other. As silly as it sounded I wrote to him. I didn't know how he would get to read it before the wedding, but it didn't matter.

I folded it and slipped it into my pocket. I took a few minutes to remove the ruined nail polish from my stay at the Cullens' then I made sure I was completely packed for the trip. Mom and Lora were hanging out at the kitchen table going over family trees and tribal stories and legends. I was surprised they were getting along so well.

I went to find Ahnah curled up in the living room doodling on a notepad. It only took a glance to see what she was up to; writing Seth's name with all the girly hearts and flowers of young love. I saw the name Ahnah Clearwater and it surprised me for a second. I smiled at her, thinking that she was my future sister-in-law. I had been so excited for Kyle to have a big extended family I'd forgotten that I was gaining new family members as well. In fact Lora would be my sister-in-law too which was confusing if I thought about it.

"You must be so excited about the wedding tomorrow!" She looked at me with her fresh excitement in her whole demeanor and I couldn't help but smile.

"I am, but it seems to be taking forever! I would have skipped the whole wedding if not for my family. I just want Kyle, the rest isn't important." She seemed a little confused by my lack of excitement about the wedding.

"But it's so romantic! I can't wait until I can pick out the gown and flowers and have bridesmaids and music! Seth says whatever I want will be fine with him,. I guess you two are alike in that way. When I asked Uncle Kyle, he just said he wanted the right bride and everything else was just icing on the cake. What kind of cake are you having?" She looked at me expectantly like I had a menu in front of me.

"I'm not sure. I let Mom decide so I'm sure it will be good."

"What about the flowers? What will your bouquet look like?"

"Umm....I let Mom decide....she's better at it than I am!" Ahnah was giving me a funny look.

"Is there anything you picked out? Just one thing that you knew you just _had _to have?" Her eyes were wide as she watched me defy convention.

"Well....I _did _pick out the groom! I'm pretty sure I just _have _to have him! I know it seems weird to you, but up until I met Kyle I wasn't planning on ever getting married. I had a fiance once, and he left me. I was bitter about that for so long that I thought I'd never get over it. When I met Kyle he changed everything for me. I haven't known him for very long and yet I still know that it's forever. Still, it didn't give me a lot of time to plan a wedding. Everything I wanted before seems silly now, and anything after....well there just wasn't time. I trust my mom to do it well, and as long as my man is waiting for me it doesn't matter what color the flowers are or even if I have flowers." She started to understand that it wasn't that I didn't care about the wedding, but that the details weren't as important as the people.

"Well, at least I'll have lots of time to plan _my _wedding! Uncle Kyle says I need to wait at least until I'm eighteen. He wanted to make me wait until I graduated from college, but you talked him out of it. Thank you for that! He said he'd help with college and the wedding, but only if we followed the rules. I'd marry Seth right away if it was up to me."

"Ahnah, how did it feel for you? I mean did you just fall instantly in love, or was it something that he said or did?" I had to know if there was imprinting on both sides.

"Well, when I saw him I thought he was so good looking....he's just so cute! And then he smiled at me like he was so happy to see me. He was polite to Mom and he helped Uncle Kyle, so I knew he was a nice guy. But he just paid so much attention to me, even though Akiak kept trying to show him stuff and get his attention. When we put our stuff on the plane he wouldn't even let me carry my own bags, and when it was time to leave he let Akiak sit in the co-pilot's seat and sat in the back with me. We talked the whole trip and he wanted to know everything about me. He said I was beautiful." She blushed when she said it.

"So, did you fall in love right away, or do you remember when it happened?" I still hadn't gotten my answer.

"I don't think it was instant. But it was like everything he did and said was just for me. It was like sliding down hill on a fast sled; by the time we landed I knew he was the one!" She was back to the giddy teenager.

"So, what if it's just infatuation? You know, a crush or puppy love?" She looked at me like I was out of my mind.

"Not possible. I've had those before; this is so much more! I once had a crush on this guy who works on the boat with my dad. Whenever he would come around I would get all breathless and my heart would beat faster. I would just hang on every word he said even though some of the things he said turned out to be really kind of stupid. But it's almost backward with Seth. I feel perfectly fine when he's with me. It's like he's _supposed _to be with me. It's times like now that I feel all breathless and my heart is beating faster. It's being away from him that makes me feel kind of queasy and weird. And I don't hang on every word he says; it's almost like I know what he's going to say before he says it, but I still want to hear it. He actually listens to what _I_ have to say. I don't know when it happened, I just knew before we even talked last night that I was in love with him. It feels somehow like he was made just for me; is that silly?" She looked up at me and I had to smile.

"It may be silly, but for us I think it's true. I feel like that when I'm with Kyle. It didn't happen that fast for me, but it _did _happen. I think I had too much hurt and anger to get over. It's like he was able to love me enough for both of us until I could love him back." I almost forgot I was talking to a sixteen year old kid, but she seemed to understand and I didn't feel strange.

I knew there wasn't much reason to wait up since Kyle wouldn't be coming back. I was about to go get ready for bed when there was a tap on the door. It was Seth and Akiak grinning on the doorstep. Ahnah rushed to hug Seth and Akiak handed me a note. "Miss Rosalie insisted we deliver this to you. It's from Kyle....she kind of encouraged him to write it. We're going back for a little while longer....we need to see who wins. They're playing poker, and Emmett is losing his shirt. Truly it was made by some expensive Italian designer and he just threw it in the pot. Jasper is scarey good. Jacob had to quit since he lost so much. Sam is holding his own, but Kyle is cleaning up! When we left it was between him and Jasper." They looked like they were ready to run back when I remembered my note.

"Here, can you give this to Kyle?" Their words finally caught up to me. "Wait, you said Sam was there? Who else went?"

They looked at each other Seth broke away from Ahnah long enough to answer. "Well, there's Kyle, Jacob, Sam, Me and Akiak, Quil, Embry, Jared. Paul came for a few minutes, but he had to take the younger pack members on patrol. And there was Emmett, Jasper, Edward, and Carlisle. They let Edward play one game while Bella was there shielding everyone's thoughts from him. He lost.

"Did everyone go hunting first?" I wanted to know what they were up to and I could see they were getting anxious to leave.

"Uh yeah, we did that at dusk. I'll tell you about it sometime later, okay?" Seth kissed Ahnah goodbye and they both rushed off into the night. When I closed the door we both felt a bit let down. But Seth would be coming back again; Kyle was gone for the night.

"I think I'm just going to go to bed early. No use facing a photographer with dark circles under my eyes." I headed to Mom's room and curled into a ball in her bed. I felt lonely even though I wasn't really alone. I thought I would have trouble sleeping with so much ahead of me, but I drifted off almost immediately. I didn't even hear Seth and Akiak come back in at Midnight, or Mom come in to sleep.

When I woke it was six and the sun was just rising. I tried not to wake anyone as I went in to take my shower. I took extra time to do the things I normally rush through. I put something old on since I still had several hours before I would need to be ready. I slipped into the kitchen to make breakfast, then I remembered the note I'd gotten last night. I sat eating toast reading his words to me. From Tikaani all the way through; with all my love eternally, you're soon to be husband. When everyone started to wake up and come in to join me I was wiping tears from my eyes. I hurried to hide the letter so I could help serve breakfast and keep busy through the longest five hours ever!

Almost as soon as the breakfast mess was cleaned up there was a knock at the door. I was stunned to see three of the most beautiful women who'd ever walked through our village, standing on the doorstep glittering! The sun was shining down on them and their skin sparkled like diamonds as they tried to keep their faces out of the direct light. As soon as I had the door open, Bella, Alice, and Rosalie slipped inside. They came equipped with stuff – female stuff that I might have had at one time but had tossed into the trash or a deep closet a long time ago. Curlers, curling irons, hair clips, make-up, brushes, lotions, perfumes, nail polishes, and even eyelash curlers! They came at me like a platoon ready to do battle and I retreated to the bedroom and unsuccessfully tried to shut them out.

"Isn't there a treaty that says you can't come here and assault me?" I looked helplessly at the other women who were smiling instead of coming to my rescue.

"We've got special permission from both Sam and Jacob to be here!" It was Alice leading the charge as she plugged in several little appliances and opened up her arsenal of products. "We just couldn't let you go to your own wedding looking like the ugly duckling! I didn't think it should take so long to fix my hair and add make-up to my face, but they'd slotted two hours! Rosalie gave me a pedicure, which was beyond stunning that she would do such manual labor. Bella artfully did my manicure in a shade of sheer pale rose that actually complemented my skin tone. Alice went about setting my hair in big rollers, then she unpacked a box she had brought with some of the prettiest underclothes I'd ever seen. "We're not letting you wear that old stuff under your dress; it's tired and the elastic is fading."

While I was being attended to, Mom, Lora, and Ahnah came and went, also getting ready. The Cullen's were happy to help them, even though I was their special project. Once the curlers were out of my hair I saw what was going to take more time. Alice brought out the flowers. Tiny white miniature roses and other small delicate flowers. She used the smallest strands of hair to braid and twist the flowers into a coronet in my hair. I thought it was going to look strange, but when she was finished it was actually beautiful. I still had my hair loose in back, but with body instead of hanging straight. I didn't have much time to admire her artistry since she started working on my make-up next. I usually didn't worry about wearing make-up since with my coloring a little lipstick was usually more than enough. But again Alice had the magic touch. I almost didn't recognize the person looking back from my mirror.

As soon as my make-up was finished she told me I should get dressed. "That's crazy, I've still got a long time!" She showed me the clock and it was 10:30! I had everyone clear out while I put on my new underwear. Mom came in to help me put the dress on over my head without ruining my hair and make-up. I also put on Ahnah's necklace and turned it so the bear was centered. I started to get nervous when I saw myself in the mirror; I looked like a bride! Mom hugged me and opened the door . Bella, and Alice hugged me when they saw me, and Lora was moved to tears. Alice took my hand and slipped a bracelet onto my wrist.

"You forgot your 'something blue.' This is a light blue topaz since you're not doing the garter toss." I knew she could see the future, but what I wondered is why she bothered to concentrate on _my _future. She also handed me a small package about the size of a book. "This is my wedding gift for you. I don't want you to open it until you are on your honeymoon. You might want to put it on your suitcase so you don't forget it. I did what she advised. It was time to go and I watched the Cullen women slip out and climb into Mom's Jeep. They tossed the keys to their Audi to Mom before they sped away with Ahnah in the car beside them.

**a/n: I hate this! Only three more chapters to go after this! This has been such a learning process I hate to see it end. I am still a sucker for reviews, so please let me know what you think even if it's unfavorable. **

**Also, if you haven't looked, I'm writing another story that's quite a bit darker than this one. Dark Roots is about the vampire Stefan, but even if you're a wolf lover it is still a good read since he's not one of the main characters who have been written to death.  
**


	13. Chapter 13 Wedding

Chapter 13.

Wedding

"It wouldn't do for you to show up to your own wedding in a Jeep." Edward turned and smiled back at us from the drivers seat. We climbed into the luxury car and he drove us to the perfect spot for a wedding; the beach. The sun was shining and I was worried that the Cullen's wouldn't be able to be seen because of the affect the sun had on their skin. We parked on the side of the road and walked down the pathway to a tent that was set up. Mom took Lora to find her place for the wedding. I stepped into the tent where I was supposed to wait for the start of the wedding. I was surprised since I wasn't alone; Emily was there, dressed in a tea length red dress. It was a perfect match to the one worn by Ahnah who was also inside fiddling with her hair.

"Your mom planned for you to have attendants today even though you didn't want to. So I'm your matron of honor!" Emily seemed pleased with the surprise. "Ahnah is a bridesmaid, and so is Rosalie!" I was most surprised to see Rosalie, looking stunning in a matching red dress, but with a large hat on her head and gloves covering her hands.

"I've been a bride so many times; I wanted to know what it was like to be the bridesmaid." She smiled a genuine smile and I couldn't help but laugh.

"I'm so glad you are all with me!" I thought about how it seemed my wedding was turning into some kind of healing and peacemaking effort. A year ago I would have never though this was possible, to have two of the people who bore so much of my anger and hatred actually participate in my _wedding _as friends! "So, what other surprises do you have?" I looked at Emily and she smiled knowingly.

"I can tell you that Sam has a surprise for you, but that's all I'm saying." As I was trying to figure out what kind of surprise Sam might come up with, I heard the drums start. Many major celebrations and holidays included the drumming. It was so deep in our traditions I should have known that Mom would have included them. I loved the way the rhythmic sound drifted over the water. Emily kept looking at her watch, and then Mom slipped into the tent.

"It's better than I hoped! Those men must have come down here last night to set things up; it's amazing! They set up chairs and places for everyone to sit. They've even put up several sail shades to keep the sun off the wedding. They had to climb the rocks and anchor the cables to get them to work as well as driving the other anchors deep into the ground! I don't know how they did so much. Leah, just wait til you see it! She handed me my bouquet which was simple red roses with white miniature roses tucked in along with baby's breath and other white flowers. Mom too wore red, and her dress was simple and elegant. She held a single white rose in honor of Dad. "Seth isn't walking with you like we'd planned. He's actually one of Kyles attendants, and he's escorting Ahnah, so it's just you and me."

The drumming stopped and all I heard were the waves. Then I heard piano music drifting along with the sound of the waves. It was beautiful and hauntingly familiar. I listened mesmerized at the beauty of the music. I almost didn't notice when the singing started. So in tune with the music I was repeating the words before I realized they'd been sung. I knew that voice, it was Edward! "Mom, did Bella loan you her recording?"

"I'm glad you recognized the music; it came as a surprise to me too!" The song ended and then another one began to play. It took me a minute to realize it was the bridal march. At least it was there somewhere in the complex arrangement that human fingers would have had difficulty playing. "That's our music! Leah sweetheart, this is it! We stepped out of the tent and Rosalie lead gracefully as Emmett came and took her arm. He wore light gray pants and a simple white shirt and he kept his face turned away from the sun while Rosalie leaned close so her hat would shield him. Following them Seth came up and took Ahnah's arm and she smiled happily up at him. Last I was surprised to see Sam come up to take Emily's arm. I knew that would make him Kyle's best man and I was stunned when he smiled and winked, making Emily laugh.

A subtle shift in the intensity of the music let me know it was my turn. Mom kissed my cheek and we walked. We were walking along the beach and the tide was going out. I could see the footprints in the sand and I left my own as I was barefoot. It seemed there was a lot to take in as we came closer. I saw the sails overhead like she'd said; the opaque triangular pieces held by wires and cables anchored to the rocks to shade the people beneath. I was stunned to see that the music wasn't recorded, but was Edward playing a baby grand piano set way back against the rocks on a wooden platform.

I didn't have time to wonder how they'd gotten it to the beach and set up since I caught sight of my groom. With the guests facing the ocean he was closest to the water and he was looking past my attendants to watch me approach as we walked along the water. It was all I could do not to run to him. He looked amazing all in white with his pants rolled up a little. I smiled and I lost sight of everything else but him. Mom placed my hand in his and I felt that magical connection of finally being where I belonged.

One of the tribe elders performed the ceremony and I was surprised when for the ring ceremony Kyle pulled out a necklace. As he recited the vows he slipped the necklace around my neck and it connected magnetically. Emily handed me an identical necklace for me to put around Kyle's neck. I imagined in a sudden change the magnets would release easily. It took me a second to realize each necklace had a wedding band suspended on it. It also came as a bit of a surprise when the elder used my new name. We'd agreed that I would take his last name. Kyle would legally be Kyle Taqukaq Sangilak. My married name was going to be Leah Tikaani Sangilak. Part of me wanted to stay Clearwater for Mom and Dad, but I knew that soon she'd be getting another Clearwater to take my place.

I hadn't been following the words of the ceremony, I was caught up just gazing at Kyle, knowing he was going to be mine forever. When the elder stopped talking I realized something important had happened. Kyle smiled down at me. It hit me then what I'd missed; the pronouncement! I was married! Kyle pulled me close and kissed me; he was all mine! As we turned around to face the crowd, Edward started to play again. That's when I saw them. Twelve birds flying our way from the top of the rocks. Various birds of prey; golden and bald eagles, hawks, and even a California condor! They flew, swooped and spun, following an orchestrated pattern They flew close enough to the guests that every head was craning to see them. Then they headed out over the ocean but not too far and there they floated on the air currents for a few more minutes. Then I watched as they formed the shape of a heart, holding it for several moments before separating to fly back the way they'd come. I noticed that the music was perfect for the flying birds, as every note seemed to soar on it's own. While the guests were distracted Kyle took the opportunity to kiss me again.

He whispered to me, "Sam's been working hard to get the youngest ones to do that."

I looked past Kyle and saw Sam still looking at the sky. "Thanks Sam, that was beautiful! Now if I remember right, you and your bride have special Valentines plans. You should go soon; I appreciate all you've done. Tell the boys thank you for me!"

"Well, it's the least I could do after messing up the plans for your first wedding."

"You don't owe me anything Sam. It's worked out for all of us and I wouldn't change a thing....well, maybe my own behavior. But I don't want you two to ruin your plans just for the reception. I'll make sure Mom saves you some wedding cake.

We had to leave first and we hurried back up the beach and up the trail to the road. Kyle took my arm and lead me to a waiting limo with a 'Just Married' sign on the back. I didn't ask where it came from; my day had already been so full of surprises what was one more? Someone had put my bag in the car and I slipped into stockings and the white shoes. When Kyle pulled me to him I forgot everything else. "Who's driving? Can they just keep going until we lose everyone now that we're alone?" I put my arms around my husband, and I was finally able to kiss him without worrying about where it would lead.  
"You are so beautiful my bride! I can't believe I get to keep you forever!" We were wrapped in each other's arms as we rode to the reception at the community center. Once inside there were pictures to be taken and the chaos of greeting everyone who came to wish us well. The photographer was good, and I hardly remembered seeing her at the wedding. We were directed on where to stand, and what to do, but it didn't matter since Kyle was beside me. When we posed for the group pictures I was happy that Sam and Emily had stayed with us long enough to have our whole wedding party in the photos. Rosalie had taken off her hat and gloves once inside and The photographer posed us more as couples rather than his side and her side. I smiled thinking that Kyle and I were centered in a photo of forever couples.

I hugged Sam and Emily as they slipped out of the crowd that surrounded us after the pictures. "That was really nice of you to have him as your best man; I never would have imagined you could get along so well." I had to speak almost to his ear as people arrived and the noise level went up. We shook hands and hugged everyone who came through the receiving line, and then they were seated. After the pictures Emmett and Rosalie slipped into the background to avoid the touches of so many people. Still we stood shoulder to shoulder with Ahnah, Seth, Mom and Lora, who helped deflect some of the crowd.

Kyle introduced me to a man I didn't recognize in the line. "This is Ben Carver, he's a member of our flying club and he's agreed to take Lora back home as soon as all the drama is over. Lora said it was okay for Akiak and Ahnah to stay until we get back from our honeymoon, then we can all go home together. You're mom said that there was plenty of room now that _your_ bedroom was available." I shook his hand and smiled as he complemented Kyle on his 'lovely wife.'

I was surprised to see the rest of the Cullen family come through the line. The hugs we had for each other were genuine, and I had to specially thank Edward for playing and singing. I again thanked Alice for her help in getting me ready. They said their goodbyes since they didn't want to stay for the meal that was coming next.

As soon as we were all seated, food was served. I was surprised to see the dozen younger shape shifters from Sam's pack hurrying between the tables serving guests. I was humbled by the number of people who had come together to help with all the preparations. The wedding cake was beautiful and sitting on a prominent table, the woman orchestrating the food service smiled and waved to Mom. All in all everything went perfectly, except for a collision of two of the boys collecting plates. We did many typical wedding things like cut the cake and serve each other the first bite. There was a toast with white grape juice, and dancing both modern and traditional tribal. When it was time to give the gifts I let Mom take over since she knew the reasons behind everything. She hurried through the gifting so there would be enough time to get to everyone. I was surprised at how well she'd chosen, as well as how lavish some of them were. It was almost like opening wedding gifts, only in reverse. It seemed strange that it was over so soon after planning it for so long.

My head was spinning I and was surprised when the clock in the back of the room said it was past three. Mom announced that we would be leaving, but that the party would continue. As we headed for the door people stood up and applauded, following us outside where they tossed rice, birdseed, and flower petals. We ran to the car and waved goodbye as we drove away in the limo.

We went to the house first to change clothes and I needed to take the flowers out of my hair. It seemed like I was saying goodbye to my childhood home, and Kyle put his arms around me and kissed me like he knew what I was thinking. I had my suitcase and the gift from Alice and he helped me put it in the trunk. The drive to the airstrip was me wrapped in his arms and little else. Wherever he was taking me, I'd have to leave him alone so he could fly the plane.

As the limo pulled next to the hangar I was surprised when the driver jumped out to help move the luggage. It was Jacob! "You don't know how hard it is to find a limo for Valentines Day!" he laughed. "If I hadn't done some mechanical work for the company I'd have been out of luck. As soon as I see you two off I've got an appointment to drive for another couple later this evening." He grinned conspiratorially. "Charley Swan is taking your mom out for a special Valentines dinner. I get to drive, and Billy is going to 'babysit' the newest imprinted couple. In some ways I'm almost glad Nessie is still a child!" I hugged him goodbye and Kyle shook his hand, then Kyle started with his pre-flight check list. He walked me through it, showing me what everything was and what he was looking for as he went down the list. When he helped me into the co-pilot's seat he went through the same process inside the plane. He still hadn't told me where we were going.

**a/n: I know these chapters seem to be getting shorter and taking more time between posts. But it's the countdown to the end; only two more to go and maybe an additional chapter for some other players. I hate to see it end since I know it will fall off the front pages and be buried under tons of other submissions....must be how a real writer feels. Thanks to all who have read and reviewed, your positive comments make my day, and the negative ones keep me working harder to improve. **


	14. Chapter 14 Honeymoon

Chapter 14.

Honeymoon

As he took the plane to the end of the runway we waved to Jacob. He reached behind his seat and handed me a box wrapped in white paper. "I wanted to get you something for a wedding gift, and I hope you like it. You said you wanted to learn to work with me, and this is a good start." In the box was a camera. It wasn't like his with all the lenses, but I could tell it wasn't a cheap one. "It's one of the best digital cameras out there. I'm still partial to film, but most photographers are using the smaller ones like that. I was thinking that we could cover both bases. I wanted you to have it so you could take pictures during the trip. I can't wait to see what kind of eye you have."

His gift reminded me of Alice's gift and I had to reach behind me to pick up the small package. Hers was wrapped in pink paper and I was puzzled when I opened it. It was a small box, but inside there were legal documents. She had a copy of my drivers license, and a passport with my new name inside. I recognized the picture as the one she'd taken on the day I'd left their house. Since I hadn't signed it, I realized it must be a forgery, but it was a good one. Kyle was even more confused than I was.  
"Why would she give you a forgery of your passport? I mean having your new name is thoughtful, but it seems a little odd."

"That's just it Kyle; this isn't a copy, I don't _have _a passport. She must think I'm going to need one." I smiled his way hoping that he'd give away his secret destination.

"You're kidding me! How do you not have a passport? I thought you'd have left the country at least once in your lifetime. I didn't even think about it!" He seemed embarrassed by his oversight. "So, how much traveling have you done? I mean I'm sure you've seen a few states at least, right?"

I wasn't sure how he would take it. "Well, not really. I've been in the same place all my life. Except for when I ran away and found you; I saw Canada and Alaska for the first time. Quileutes don't leave home much. Our history tells us that we've been in the same place for over four thousand years. In many ways traveling is discouraged; we don't even go to a regular public school, so we don't get a lot of exposure to other places and cultures."

He looked straight ahead for a while and I thought he was upset by something I'd said. "I am amazed over and over again how you found me! The number of things that had to happen for you to cross my path keeps growing! I am astounded that the very first time you left home you came almost straight to me! There's no way this is an accident Leah! I had a chance to see some of the men in your tribe that you could have fallen for. The ones you were not related to that is. You didn't fall for Jared, Quil, Paul, or Embry; any of them would have been good mates. You're special Leah. I'm even more convinced after listening to your mom talking about your family lineage. Whatever makes us what we are, is multiplied in you! The same is true of Seth, and he didn't choose a girl from your tribe either. I think there's a reason for this"

"Isn't it enough that it's helped me find you? I'm interested in finding out more about it, but right now I'm just content to be with you and not have to worry about some driving instinct or master plan behind it all. And are you going to tell me where we're going?"

He smiled and looked over at me and smiled. "Well, I'd thought about taking you to the Ice Hotel in Lapland up by the Arctic Circle. They build it every year out of sheets of ice, and it's a marvel in art and architecture. I really did want to take you, but then I had a look at the distance and flight times. It's almost halfway around the world and I didn't want to be flying on our first night as husband and wife." He smiled again and I blushed at the thought of our first night. "We're actually going to Portland Oregon first. I'm going to store the plane there for two weeks and I asked Ahnah to repack your suitcase to make sure your wardrobe was appropriate for the weather where we're going." I groaned thinking about all the inappropriate things I had hiding out in my closet and dresser.

While we flew I asked him about his poker game. He smiled and looked my way. "Well, Edward played once while Bella blocked our thoughts from him. He lost badly and Jasper won. Then We got to watch Emmett and Jacob both lose several hands. We were all thinking that Jasper was cheating, but it's his ability that made his opponents more likely to stay in rather than fold. He gave off a sense of calm and confidence that made him a lot of money." I was surprised to hear they were playing with money, but I didn't say anything. Carlisle and Sam were evenly matched and the younger ones didn't play the game. Once I figured out Jasper's game, I started to beat him. Emmett tries hard but he's easy to read. I think Jacob was just distracted by the little one who kept coming in to play with him. None of us had the heart to tell her it was for boys only.

"Sam won Emmett's fancy shirt, and I took Jasper to the cleaners. Funny, but you'd think with them being what they are they'd have an easier time bluffing. I realized early that they could tell more about me than was normal. If I bluffed they could hear my heart beat faster, and even sense my body temperature rise. I learned that if I thought about you, my heart would race and my temperature would go up whether I was bluffing or not. I almost feel bad about winning so much money from them, but I was able to pay Jacob back for his losses. Even with all the winnings, I still would rather have been with you."

It was funny, but even though I felt the same way about him, it seemed silly when he said it. I couldn't imagine anyone wanting to spend so much time with _me._ I wondered how long that would last. Would he still feel that way after the honeymoon? Would he still feel like that when we got back to our regular lives? I was starting to worry that when he no longer wanted to be with me all the time I'd feel the loss. I couldn't imagine not wanting to be with _him,_ but he was so much more attractive and interesting than I was. What if I felt this way forever and he didn't?

"Don't do that!" He looked over at me and it seemed like he was upset about something.

"Don't do what?" I asked confused.

"That look. It looks like you're having some kind of doubt. I used to see it all the time when I first met you. Little by little it's going away but I still recognize it. Sometimes I just don't think you understand how much I love you! I want to be with you Leah; in fact if I wasn't flying this plane I'd show you just how much I want to be with you right now! It's not about this imprinting or bonding thing we have, it's much more than that! There's not another person in this world that can draw me to them the way you can! I think if you hadn't found me I would have had to come looking for you. You belong with me and I don't want you to ever forget it!

It was quiet for a little while as I thought about what he'd said. I found myself playing with the necklace he'd given me during the ceremony. I hadn't had much time to really look at it. It was a pretty gold wedding band on a thin but heavy gold chain. I held the chain in my hands and tipped the ring back and forth between my fingers, feeling the weight of the gold. The chain was fairly long, allowing the ring to hang low against my chest. I could easily slip it over my head without breaking the magnetic connection. "Thank you for the necklace and ring. I didn't really expect anything after Seth brought it up. I like the idea of the necklace so it won't become a trap in a sudden change."

"You don't need to thank me Leah! Every bride deserves a wedding ring; I'm just sorry I didn't let you pick it out yourself. I also went ahead and got the one to match for myself. I wanted to surprise you with it. It should be an easy thing to take off before any intentional changes. Seth actually suggested a transmitter or a microchip that could be located, but I decided not to do that. I'd rather just replace it if it gets lost. Besides, I think after you wear it a while I'll be able to find it by smell. The ring is your size if you ever want to wear it" I'd already slipped it on my finger a time or two and it fit perfectly.

"I don't doubt you Kyle." I felt like I needed to apologize. "I know you love me. I"m just afraid that it's too perfect and the only way to go is down from here. I can't imagine not loving you like this. But I doubt that I have what it takes to hold someone's attention for a long time. I'm so much younger than you are; I've never even left the state before I met you. I'm not worldly and experienced and I have so much to learn about life. I sometimes just can't understand what you see in me!"

"Tikaani! You talk about so many things as if they really matter. I don't care that you've never traveled, it just means that I can be the one to show you the different places of the world. And I'm glad you're not worldly and experienced since I'm not either! I may have been around longer and traveled farther, but I've been a very solitary person for most of that time. I've always been more comfortable behind a camera than in the middle of the action. You've actually helped me to get out of that since I've been around your friends and family. I haven't had any close friends for so long I almost didn't know how to react to friendship. That was you Leah, I would never have made an effort if not for your encouragement. I see so much in you Leah that you don't even see in yourself. You have this bright spark of life that's impossible to resist. There is this constantly evolving sense of who you are and I'm so anxious to see where it leads us. How could I get tired of that?"

It was time to land and he was receiving instructions and I was quiet beside him. Once on the ground with another perfect landing there was a taxi waiting for us. With the airplane safely stored I watched out the window as we sped along the roads of Portland Oregon. As we came in sight of the harbor I saw what he had planned for us. It was a huge cruise ship and he smiled when he saw I understood. The sun was going down and we hurried to check in and board the ship. He had booked a room with a great view of the ocean and I was feeling a bit like Cinderella at the ball as he tipped the man who carried our suitcases. I laughed out loud when I watched him hang up the garment bag that had all the fancy clothes that had come to me through Alice and Bella.

As soon as the door closed we stood together in the small room with its one bed. When he pulled me to him I was almost afraid to look at him. But I looked into his eyes and knew that everything was going to be fine. It was Kyle; the man loved with all I had in me. We hadn't left the harbor yet and he guided me out to our private deck to look at the city and the harbor with the moon shining down. The air was chilly but it barely touched me as he wrapped his warm arms around me from behind. We stood for a while waiting, then the ship slowly started to move out. We watched the lights disappear as we headed into the open ocean. When we finally went inside, we closed the doors and pulled the curtains. "You know, I love the room with a view, and the balcony is just amazing. But we could have done just as well with a smaller, interior room.

"Leah, I wanted you to have a beautiful honeymoon, not be crowded into some tiny interior room. What's bothering you now?"

"It's nothing....I shouldn't have said anything. I'm just worried about the expense of a honeymoon. As long as I'm with you that's all that matters. You don't have to waste your money on and expensive room and all the luxuries." He laughed and pulled me into his arms and kissed me.

"I should have rented a dinghy and a set of oars if that's all it took to make you happy! I wanted to do this for you. I didn't want to bring you on a cruise for you to look at the four walls of an interior room! I won't cut corners and skimp on your honeymoon if I don't have to! Leah, trust me we can afford this; you don't have to worry about the budget."

"But I know these rooms cost so much...."

"It doesn't matter what they cost! Tikaani, I'm sorry if my simple lifestyle has lead you to believe that I'm destitute."  
"I don't think you're destitute, Kyle. I just thought it would be better for us both if we weren't too extravagant. I don't have a job yet and you haven't worked for a couple weeks and I....why are you laughing?"

"You married me thinking I was poor? Or struggling paycheck to paycheck? Leah, if I ever doubted you loved me, I know that at least you didn't marry for my money! I didn't mean to give you the impression that I was some kind of struggling artist; I'm not! I've been doing photography for almost twenty-five years. I've made a name for myself and I'm quite well paid for my work. I've also been painting for almost as long, and that pays even better. I've had no major expenses except the flying club and I have few obligations. Leah, I could take you on a trip like this every week and still not have to worry about money."

"Are you trying to tell me you're like this rich guy living all alone up in Alaska in some tiny underground cabin painting pretty pictures? "

"That does sound a little depressing if you put it that way." His face twisted into a crooked grin. "How about I'm a man who is going to be living in Alaska on four square miles of pristine beachfront property I own, with the most beautiful woman in the world. We're going to be living in a cozy underground dwelling I've invented. It's in limited production, and I hold the patents to it. It's built to withstand floods, earthquakes and fires, and it's also self-sustaining. I'm the man who is sought out by various people in advertising, travel and tourism, and outdoor adventure because I take the best pictures in the industry. My work has been more widely published than any other in my field and I can demand top dollar because I'm the best. I'm also making a name for myself as an artist, and I'm not going to tell you the obscene amount of money my paintings can bring. In fact, if your mother ever wants to sell the one I painted of you, she could easily afford a new Jeep. I've had people trying to buy that one for years. The only reason I even took it to show was in hopes of finding the subject." He smiled and pulled me closer to him. "Now that I have her I don't need the paining."

I was still confused. "But you live like you have nothing! Your clothes look like what Jacob or Seth would wear to play in, and you have a cupboard full of canned food, and....!" He was laughing before I could finish.

"Leah, I told you I was a loner. What use are fancy clothes to chase bears in the wild? And why would I have a stocked pantry when I'm not even home to eat most of the time. I've got money set aside to pay for Akiak and Ahnah to go to college. I've got it set up that any of my other nieces and nephews could go too if they ask. I belong to the flying club instead of owning my own plane because the maintenance and storage are more than I want to bother with. I have what's important to me and everything else just serves a purpose." He pulled me tighter and kissed me. "I like how I live, but I _love _you, and if you want to do things differently that's fine too. I mean if you want to take cruises, or buy fancy clothes and build a mansion somewhere....I'll adjust."

"Oh Kyle, no! I like the way you live too! I don't need all that stuff either, I just need you. I just had no idea you were so...."

"Rich? Successful?" He supplied the words I was thinking. "Leah, until I met you I had nothing in comparison. And I have nothing in comparison to the Cullen's in case you're wondering. Maybe in another fifty years!" He grinned. "Leah, I don't like to get caught up in worrying over money matters. The best thing it can buy us is freedom. So if I want to take my beautiful bride on a cruise in style, I can. And if I plan to take her on a rainforest safari afterward, I can. And if we want to go study polar bears in the arctic we can go for as long as we want. And if I plan to take her to the Ice Hotel on the Torne River for our first anniversary, I can." He had my head spinning with his plans, but it was nothing compared to how I felt when he pulled me down onto the edge of the bed. Suddenly I was conscious that this was my honeymoon night, and we were alone.

He looked me in the eyes, asking me silently if I was ready. I could hear my own heart beating and suddenly it felt too warm in the room. I jumped up and hurried to the balcony doors and opened them a little to let in the cold ocean air. The curtains billowed slightly and the sound of the water was too faint to calm my nerves. "I think I need to change...." I smiled nervously and went to pick up my overnight bag. He crossed the room and stopped me, wrapping me in his arms and kissing me.

"Don't change. I like what you're wearing, it reminds me of when you came to me in my dream." I was wearing the peach sweater and cream colored leather skirt Alice had given me. "You don't have to go dress up in some special wedding night lingerie to make me want you." He pulled me closer and his hands slipped into my hair as he kissed me. "I won't hurt you Leah, you don't have to run away from me." It was his scent; his taste that washed over me, blending with the clean air breezing in off the ocean. Warm fresh baked bread covered in honey, and fresh air; I was lost in his arms and kisses. I closed my eyes and let him remove the barriers between us. I felt the cool air on my skin and his very warm touch. He lifted me and carried me to the bed almost like a child.

Together in bed with my eyes still closed I could feel him; his skin, his warmth and his weight and his hands lightly touching me. His taste and his scent were overwhelming and I was breathing him in with short gasping breaths. I wanted to be his wife in every way, but it seemed there was something more that I was missing. There was still a barrier between us and it was distracting me in an annoying way. Something didn't belong here!

I felt the moment when I physically became his wife; joining in the most intimate way with him. It was almost exactly right, but still....something was wrong. The words from our wedding ceremony came back to me; I hadn't even listened, but there they were: '….and be joined to his wife and the two shall become one flesh, so they are no longer two but one flesh!' That was it! That was what was coming between us; the flesh, our physical bodies!

My eyes flew open an I stared into his. "Kyle....this isn't who we are! This isn't _what _we are! Our bodies are just another animal; it's a choice we've made! There's more than this!" I kissed him then, pulling him as close to me as I could. "My love, you are my partner, my mate, and my husband. But you are also my completion! You make me whole!" With my eyes locked onto his confused face I changed. Not into a wolf, a bear, or an eagle....but what we were always meant to be! Somewhere between the changes there was always a breath of reality we'd race past on the way to becoming something else. An instant where we were our true selves. I reached for this sliver and became who and what I really was for the first time ever! I saw the look of surprise and recognition on his face and in a breath he joined me! Kyle and Leah ceased to be as two separated entities. We joined instead into one pure form of ever changing, shifting matter and energy! It was unimaginable bliss! It was love and acceptance in it's purest form!

I knew that there was nothing in me he couldn't see. I too could see his whole existence of loneliness and solitude as he waited for me. We were still two different beings, but we were so close and blended it was impossible to tell where one ended and the other began. It was an intimacy not known in the physical world. Where we touched, we blended, and where we blended we filled the gaping holes in each other. If I thought I loved him before, it was nothing compared to how much I loved him when all the structures and barriers were gone. And his love for me in return was almost more than I could handle! We would never be able to doubt each other again. He was as necessary as air to me, but more than just need; it was longing, and desire, wrapped up in comfort and acceptance; a total completion!

There was no need for words as our thoughts were transparent to each other, no need to touch as we blended unresistingly, and nothing else mattered or intruded. Time didn't matter, though I could feel the passing of seconds and minutes, it was like we were outside of it; cocooned in our own own existence. As I wondered why we would ever choose anything else, he answered me in his own thoughts, showing me a stagnant pool of nothingness. Without the physical we would lose something important to our growth and survival. Just existing, no matter how blissful and natural it was for us was not enough. We still needed to take physical forms. We needed to use our senses and interact with others. We needed to learn and do things that could only be accomplished with a physical body. We risked becoming stagnant and disappearing otherwise.

In the deepest recesses of what must be a racial memory I could see the reasons why we become human. They were the most intelligent and adaptable and through them more of us were born. I could see back through generations where the bonding happened, creating opportunities for new shape shifters to be born, or as a connection between two, like me and Kyle. I could see that sometimes the strain was dominant, and sometimes recessive. I could tell that those born female faced the biggest challenge due to their reproductive cycles. Though the strain was dominant, the choice to stay human was almost always made so that she could be a mother. It was hard to wrap my mind around the reasoning, but I knew that I would be able to be a mother, and I would also be able to change; always. It was like Mom had guessed; it was very strong in me.

The minutes ticked into hours and together we decided it was time to separate and become Kyle and Leah once more. When I again saw his eyes I remembered that this could be good too. Without the physical, I'd never know his smile, or the touch of his hands, or – I suddenly became aware that we were in the middle of something very physical. With the question of who we were resolved I was able to give myself completely to making love with my husband!

In the morning when we were finally able to dress and leave the room I didn't feel such a need to cling to him. I knew that there would come a time when we'd come together and share everything, and it would be better if we had some separate experiences. Still it was hard to leave his side since I just loved to be next to him; the way his hand unconsciously reached for me, the way his eyes followed me, and the way he would kiss me when no one was watching. It was our honeymoon after all, so I felt entitled to stick close even if I didn't need to.

We did all the usual things available on a ship; we ate, we danced, we played games, we listened to music, we met other couples, we swam and climbed the rock wall. But nothing compared to just being together. One night we stood on our balcony and I told him what I thought might have happened. "What if we just forgot who we were? I mean if our race is compatible with humans and maybe even other animals, what if we forgot what we really were?" I smiled up at him as he stood behind me holding me in his arms. "I could easily have just stayed Leah forever as long as I had you. Or I could have stayed a wolf knowing that I would be alone forever. What if the memory of who we are got lost because we got caught up in who we were pretending to be?" I knew he was thinking about what I was saying.

"I listened to our old legends, and they were passed down from generation to generation by word of mouth. What if they were supposed to remind us of who we are, and instead they changed and evolved into something else? In the legends there's talk of spirit walking, and leaving the body behind. That's so much like what we do, but it sounds like a myth. Add to it the wolves and the vampires and _we _have gotten lost in our own legends! I can't help but wonder if the supernatural creatures aren't related in some way. I bet if we could go back through all the thousands of years and see where we began, we'd be tied up in it together somehow. Being close to the vampires is what causes us to change, but I think it merely reminds us of who we really are. I think that Mom and Lora and many more of them could have changed if they had remembered. Not a mental memory, but something more primal and visceral. Unless the line is recessive for a whole generation that is. I don't understand it all Kyle, but I do feel that we are the beginning of our kind becoming what we were intended to be. Seth and Ahnah will have this same connection, and I think Paul and Rachel will too. Jacob and Nessie....I think their connection goes back even further than ours! I can't shake the feeling that there's some kind of split that happened between our two kinds. We decided to change into humans and have children with them, while the vampires decided to feed on humans. It set us in opposition to each other for all this time.

"My wife is so intuitive!" he looked down at me and smiled. "If you've figured this much out in this short a time, I can imagine in a few years you will have it all mastered!" He turned me in his arms and kissed me. "Do you think you have some time before you start mapping the supernatural genome, to come inside and make love with your husband?" He smiled down at me and I followed him back inside, all theories forgotten for the next few hours.

A week after we boarded the ship we left it to head out to our Amazon rainforest excursion. We had a week of wandering through hot mosquito infested swamps, coming face to face with spiders, snakes, and lizards, and being wet almost all the time. We loved it! Again and again we slipped off from our tour group to go exploring on our own. I changed into a black caiman, an anaconda, and a howler monkey the first day out! Once we knew what we were, the changes were easy, almost effortless. Kyle became a jaguar, without even studying it. Then he became a pink river dolphin and played in the Amazon river.

There was so much to learn and explore, I was almost sad when our time was up. The only concession was that we would get to go home and start living our lives together. We took a commercial flight to Oregon, then flew his plane to the landing strip nearest La Push. Mom picked us up and we told her all about our trip on the way back to the house. We had both taken lots of pictures and I couldn't want to show mom what we'd been up to. Ahnah and Seth weren't so happy to see us, but Akiak was delighted to have his uncle back. He wanted to show him all the new creatures he could become.


	15. Chapter 15 Happily Ever After

Chapter 15.

Happily Ever After

We weren't surprised when Mom asked us if it would be okay for Seth to go and stay with us. She had agreed to let him leave the Quileutte school if Lora could home school him and get him ready for college. It would mean having someone around more often than we'd planned, but he wouldn't be there very often since he was going to be studying or working with Lora's husband on the boat whenever possible. We agreed and an eager Seth was already packed.

We planned to leave first thing in the morning which gave us a chance to say goodbye to all of our friends and relatives. We weren't planning to be gone forever, but it was more difficult to say goodbye since I had mended friendships and improved relationships with those I cared about. We also got the chance to talk to Jacob and Sam about what we'd discovered on our honeymoon. They planned to pass the news on to the rest of the shape shifters in their packs and Sam wanted to see for himself once the baby was born. I was interested in finding out if Emily's trait was dominant or recessive. I wanted to know if becoming a mother would keep her from ever changing.

Because Mom already had a full house, the Cullen's invited us to spend the night at their house. We had planned on visiting them anyway and Mom looked a little bit relieved. Having a man sleeping in the same bed with your daughter must be hard to take, even if he is her husband! The guys went off to play poker, Jasper claiming he wanted a chance to win back some of his money. I took the opportunity to practice with my digital camera, snapping dozens of pictures of the beautiful people. They didn't seem to know how to take a bad picture, and even the most candid shots looked posed. I took many pictures of Bella and Nessie before it was her bedtime and the three of them disappeared into the darkness across the river, heading for their own cabin in the woods. I had the chance to thank Alice for saving my honeymoon with the passport and the clothes that were perfect for the cruise ship. I also spent some time with Esme as she flitted about the house cleaning what was already immaculate.

We were given the white bedroom where I'd stayed when I was recovering, and the guys brought our bags in after their game. Emmett and Kyle were both comparing naturalist stories about places they've been and the wonders they'd seen. "The parks were so much better before they built them all up into tourist attractions" Emmett was saying. "I used to hike through Yosemite for days without seeing any signs of people. Now there are roads, trail markings, campgrounds,....indoor bathrooms! Not to mention the litter people throw around!" I could tell he'd hit on a subject Kyle knew well. Rosalie tapped my arm and lead me up the stairs and into our guest room.

"I love him to pieces, but I've heard those stories a thousand times!" She threw herself down on the bed in 'our' room. "Truly, a thousand!" She flipped over onto her back and stared at the ceiling. "So Leah, what are you going to do when the stories start to get old and stale? Jacob says you could live a long time now, so what can you do after you get to know all there is to know about him? When you've read and discussed all the books he's read, and you've decided whether or not you like his taste in music? What do you do with forever?" She looked over at me like I was in the same boat she was in and could commiserate with her.

I sat down beside her. "I had thought the very same thing as we were leaving on our honeymoon. Maybe not in the same way, but I was worried what would happen when I no longer seemed fresh and wonderful. I was afraid that when the novelty of being in love wore off, he would discover that I just wasn't as interesting or fun as he thought.

"One of the things we discovered on our trip was that we have such an amazing connection that he can know me completely and I can do the same with him. But it also means that we can't stay glued to each other. We need to have different experiences and not be afraid to learn new things." I looked her way briefly. "He wants to teach me to fly a plane, and take pictures like he does. It's important for us to share things, but it's equally important to do somethings that we don't share. I love to run but to him it's just a way to get there. He paints and I can't hold a brush. Now that I know we'll have a long time together, I can see so many possibilities!" I looked at her and could tell she was interested. "Esme helped me see that I shouldn't be in competition with him, and I understand that. But I don't have to stagnate in his shadow either! You asked what to do with forever? I plan on taking all the time I have and _living_! "Maybe you don't understand, but I want to change into animals all around the world, I want to follow our genealogy as far back as I can. I want to learn to paint, and take pictures, and fly planes. I want to learn how to play piano like Edward. I want to read all the classics and best sellers. I want to visit the grand canyon, the great barrier reef, the pyramids, the great wall of china, and the Empire State Building. I want to hike with my husband and see the things that he's seen. I want to hold my cousin's baby when it's born. I want to learn how to juggle and do magic tricks. I want to listen to the great orchestra's of the world, and I want to go to rock concerts." I smiled at her. "Rosalie, I'm going to have him for as long as we live, and I can't wait to make memories by his side. But I also know that if I don't do anything without him I won't have anything left to share with him! I love him dearly, but I don't have to be attached to his side all the time. I don't have to be just like him to love him." I could see she was thinking about what I'd said.

But then she sprang up, kissed my cheek and said goodnight before she breezed out the door. A minute later Kyle came through the door and I was in his arms. Even with the door closed and the lights off it was still disconcerting to know that they didn't sleep and they would be able to hear any noises we made. Even our heartbeats could be observed. It was that thinking that made me want to be with Kyle in our natural state. When I suggested it to him he laughed and sat down on the bed. "Tikaani, it's not worth the risk to the others to let that revelation come out just yet. But it would be funny to see how they'd react if we suddenly 'disappeared' from their senses." Instead, we slipped under the blankets and held each other. "Of course I'm going to take a lot of grief from Emmett that we didn't raise the rafters in true newlywed style."

"Well, I think we'll just have to let Emmett win this one. I don't think I like the idea of being observed doing newlywed activities."

"I didn't think so, but if you change your mind, I'm right here...." I laughed and kissed him. I didn't realize how tired I was, but soon I drifted off to the sound of his steady breathing.

In the morning we got ready quickly and Esme had made us breakfast.

They all came to say goodbye and I knew that some of them were likely to visit us before we made it back down. I could see that Emmett and Kyle were becoming good friends, even through all the kidding. When we left I hugged every one of them, including Jasper who held me tight and buried his nose in the hair against my neck and inhaled deeply before he let me go with a wicked grin.

Back at home Mom had breakfast waiting for us as well, and the kids had their suitcases packed into the Jeep. More people showed up to say goodbye including Sam and Emily and Charley Swan. Sam offered to drive us to the airstrip and bring the Jeep back. We took turns hugging Mom goodbye, then squeezed into the Jeep. As we pulled away I saw Charley put his arm around Mom. I smiled when she leaned into him.

When we finally made it home it was late. We'd dropped the kids off with Lora, including Seth who was going to meet his future father-in-law the next day. When we walked out onto 'our' beach after parking the truck, Kyle wrapped me in his arms and I knew I was where I belonged. Not Alaska, the beach, or his house, but with him! We went inside and started living our life together; happily ever after!

Of course "Happily Ever After" doesn't mean that life stops. In the years since I got married some incredible things have happened. Emily and Sam had a baby girl! Not long after that, Sam discovered that Emily had the gene for changing and it was dominant! After the first time they changed into their natural form she discovered she could heal her face.

On one of my visits to see their baby, Akiak came along to reconnect with friends he'd made. He was planning to go East to attend University of North Carolina in the fall. After the trip he changed his plans to find a school much closer to home. He took one look at baby Samantha Uley and fell in love instantly!

Kim also found out that she had the dominant gene as well. She and Jared skipped the wedding entirely, instead eloping to Vegas.

We weren't surprised that Rachel had the dominant gene too; it seemed that all the imprinted females had it. Jacob had a tough time of it when Rachel and Paul would unite against him, not to mention when she could run with the pack her thoughts along with Paul's were enough to drive him crazy. He actually took the time to write to me and ask me what mind tricks I'd used to keep from listening in on what should be private.

With all the imprinting and marriages in the pack it seemed the whole tribe had found new life. Even still it was someone not in the pack who had the most anticipated wedding. I had to make sure I came back home when my mom accepted the proposal of Chief Charley Swan. Their wedding was somehow less and yet more than mine or Emily's. Everything they did had special meaning to them, including a tribute to Harry Clearwater. Charley wanted Mom to live with him, so she made arrangements to give the house in La Push to Seth for when he and Ahnah got married.

With Seth, Ahnah also discovered she was a shape shifter, and they had decided after college they would be moving to La Push and staying with Jacob's pack. They didn't wait the whole four years to get married, but married during the break between their freshman and sophomore years.

Sam and Jacob worked out their leadership issues; Jacob took over leading the whole pack of shape shifters, and Sam took over leading the tribal council. Jacob had to follow Sam's leadership in regards to the whole tribe, and Sam had to follow Jacob's orders in the pack.

The secret of the shape shifters was harder to keep as the pack swelled to include not only the imprinted females of the tribe, but also many of the young men as they came of age. In all of the legends and stories, we were supposed to hide our existence from outsiders, but we accidentally hid our existence from ourselves! Because our tribe had lived for hundreds if not thousands of years in the same place, our race was stronger in La Push that anywhere else we'd found. But Kyle was evidence that our tribe was not the only one that had combined with shape shifters.

One of my goals was still to find more of our kind in the world. With our work in photography and increasingly conservation efforts we do a lot of traveling. I learned to fly airplanes like I'd wanted. Kyle was a good teacher, but it was one of the other flying club members that actually trained me. Ben was tougher on me than Kyle was, and he wasn't afraid for me to be in tough spots that I might face. When I did my final test and had to kill the engine and restart it I knew that Kyle was waiting below for me worried sick.

I also learned the finer points of photography. The pictures Kyle took before our wedding were of the pack members going through their first new changes. He also had pictures of the natural beauty of the area. I had a different outlook than he did. I went to work on a project where people were juxtaposed against natural wonders. I got the idea from the Cullens' and my first picture was of Rosalie in a beautiful satin gown, standing on a branch high in an enormous tree with a view of the river valley beneath her. It was eye catching and It had me thinking of new ways to point out the majesty of nature. In one Sam let me "borrow" Samantha, and I had Kyle change into an enormous polar bear. He held her cradled in one paw while she slept and I got the picture of his look of wonder. I did a whole photo series which I sold to a top nature magazine. Leah, Tikaani Sangilak was making a name for herself.

With all the changes in the pack I almost missed one change in our friends. Rosalie has changed more than I ever could have imagined. I guess she wasn't content to just be Emmett's beautiful wife for all eternity. The pull of motherhood still had it's hold on her when she went with Carlisle to volunteer at the hospital. It started with an afternoon of rocking premature babies and grew from there. She surprised everyone when she went to nursing school and finished in half the time as a normal student. She impresses everyone with her iron resolve when it comes to human blood which she comes into contact with on a regular basis. She volunteers with different international relief agencies, going to some of the most hellish places on the planet to help suffering children. Many of the children she's helped recall her as a beautiful angel who came to save them.

Of course this left Emmett to decide if he was going to follow her or wait for her return. After her first two week trip to an earthquake disaster he decided he had to go with her. He found that he was uniquely qualified to find survivors buried in ruins, and strong enough to dig them out. The blood is still difficult for him to handle, but he made a huge bet with Jasper that he could resist longer; and they are both determined not to lose!

Nessie is a surprise to us all, but we expected that she would be special. As she nears her maturity everyone is impressed by her voracious intellect. She reads anything she can get her hands on, and what she reads she remembers. She also has a gift for music and can play any instrument perfectly. In human years she would be about fourteen now. She is fully mature in many ways, and still childlike in others. She teases Jacob mercilessly, having given up biting him years before. It's funny to watch them together as she asserts her budding womanhood, luring him to her only for him to have to remind himself that she's still a child, removing himself from an enthusiastic hug or making it clear that she cannot sit on his lap any more. As soon as she began maturing she made it clear that Jacob was indeed whom she was planning to marry, sending a somewhat disappointed Nahuel on his way. I'm still anxious to see what their marriage holds for our kind as well as the vampires.

I didn't expect it to happen so soon, but Kyle and I had only been married a year before I became pregnant. I didn't change for many months, and I had to convince Kyle to finally let me at least change into our natural form. I didn't have a thing to worry about; the baby changed right along with us! She was perfect; I knew right away with more clarity than any modern ultrasound or testing. When she was born we named her Emmy Rose Sangilak, but Kyle promised he'd find an Inuit name that suited her to add to it.

When I became pregnant again a year after Emmy-Rose, we knew it was going to be a little boy. This time during childbirth we changed into our natural state and it was as if Kyle reached in and plucked him out of me painlessly! It was the most amazing birth experience I could have imagined. We named him Harry Everett Sangilak in honor of our fathers.

With my research it's becoming clear that thousands of years ago our race had ties with the vampires. We were related, like cousins, but the choice was made on how to exist with the growing human population. Our choice was to intermix with them and protect them. The vampires instead chose to hold themselves above them and prey on them. We have since grown more and more apart in our adaptations and our reactions to each other. When Jacob and Nessie marry, I suspect it will be like coming full circle; vampires and shape-shifters will once again know they are related. Both races need humans for survival; vampires for sustenance, and shape shifters for revitalization of our own lines. Both races have shown they can step back from their nature; vampires can _not _feed on humans and shape shifters _not _change.

I have not seen any of the 'Children of the Moon' but I suspect they are what arises when a venomous vampire bites a shape shifter, but does not kill him. I can only imagine the killing, burning venom combined with our fast healing and changing. In my research I found a misconception. Their change isn't brought on by the full moon, but it instead happens in the darkest part of the lunar cycle. It is during the full moon when the beast is at it's strongest. I imagine that it's then that the shape shifter aspect asserts itself over the vampire, locking itself into the strongest and most aggressive form the shifter can imagine. Then when the poison subsides, the shape shifter would be free to assume his human form once again. If it's what I think it is, I can't imagine how agonizing it would be to feel the pain of the venom, and find yourself month after month still alive being torn apart by the warring of the supernatural drives.

Of course I'm going to have to find out for sure since it may become critical knowledge for our family. Emmy Rose is three and a half and we are all in love with her. Her Auntie Lora is already teaching her to read and she has an amazing vocabulary even if it's spoken with a three year old lisp. I was starting to worry about her lack of playmates her own age when she started talking about her imaginary friend. She had a description and everything of a boy she called Huey. He was brown with shiny black hair that he kept braided. Huey was nice and pushed her high on the swings behind Auntie Lora's house. Huey brought her surprises like a bird's nest with eggs in it, or a walrus tusk from the beach. Huey was faster than Auntie Lora and he ran away when she came out. Huey rescued her from a tree she climbed when she couldn't get down.

I worried about her socialization when I should have worried that there was a stranger stalking my daughter! Kyle noticed before I did; a strange smell she carried home with her. When he took her to Auntie Lora's he became a hawk high in the tree outside. Emmy Rose went out for playtime as usual. The man who came out of the forest wasn't one of the Inuit villagers and Kyle watched him push her on the swings, then give her a horsey ride around the yard. When Lora came out he fled so quickly Kyle had trouble following him. He called to me with his alpha voice and I came to help and we tracked Huey to a cabin in the woods. We probably terrified the man when we barged in on him without the benefit of knocking first.

I recognized him after his first frightened protests that he'd done nothing wrong. It was Nahuel, the half vampire, half human I'd first met when the Cullens' faced the Volturi after Nessie was born. I had to keep Kyle from killing him since he thought he'd cornered a child molester and I felt the grizzly bear was ready to explode.

"Please, I have not hurt your little one! I would never hurt such a sweet child! You know me Leah, I don't need her blood; I don't need any human blood! Please give me a chance to explain." He looked at us both with his warm brown eyes and we relaxed – a bit.

"It's been six years since the Volturi came to see Renesmee; the female who is like me. I left my home with my sister to prove that she posed no danger. I didn't go back home afterward instead I wanted to learn from the Cullen family how to behave less like a monster. I stayed because I thought that the little one might find an interest in me when she grew up a little more. When she made her choice I could not stay. I went instead to Denali where others who live like the Cullen's exist." He smiled at me then, something I hadn't seen him do when I knew him before.

"Leah, I have been haunted by your scent in four places now. When I took my sister Huilen back to the Amazon, I came across your familiar scent. I recognized it from my time around the Cullen family. When I went to Denali I …." He smiled again embarrassed. "...I smelled you had marked it as your territory. It was very faint, but I recognized it. Then when I left Denali I followed your trail, it lead me to a place on the beach . I wanted to visit you; I don't believe in coincidences like your scent being in my homeland _and_ where I am visiting. Your home is difficult to visit. I don't know how to just knock on the door. So I waited until I saw you outside. It amazed me to see you come out with a baby in your arms! And then I saw the little one come out and she was breathtakingly beautiful. I watched you play games and I watched you ride her on your back with the baby in his carrier. When you drove her to the house in the village I followed. I saw her when she came out to play and I introduced myself to her. She was having trouble making the swing go, so I pushed her. I brought her food to share, and I've shown her some things I found. I visit her on the days when she goes to the village. I don't mean her any harm! I was afraid for her auntie to see me since I'm a grown man she doesn't know me. But I am telling you the truth, I'm only looking out for her!" He finished his story and I could tell Kyle was suspicious.

Kyle questioned him further. "Why did you come back? I mean why would you want to spend time pushing a little girl on a swing?"

He looked nervous and confused himself. "I don't know. I just wanted to....very much. She's like a bright spot of sunshine in the world; she's so beautiful I just find it difficult to walk away from her....I can't help myself."

Kyle and I looked at each other and groaned. "You do know she's only three?" Kyle persisted just to make sure he wasn't a creep. "Does she excite you? Do you want to take her away and do things in private?"

"That's disgusting! How could a father....how could _anyone _talk about a little angel in such a way?! She should be treasured! How could anyone look at a little girl with lust?!" He looked truly sickened at the thought. "I would kill anyone who touched her in such a way!"

"Nahuel, you're over a hundred and fifty years old! Would we be right in asking you to go away and leave her alone?" I asked the question gently to see his reaction.

He was clearly torn. He took a long time to think about his answer then said, "you are right, Leah. This is inappropriate." He was polite, but he clearly seemed saddened. "I will leave and not bother your angel while she is still a child. But I would like to come back and visit in about fifteen years?" He phrased it like a question but he was clear in his intention. "Please, would you give her this?" He took a heavy gold chain from around his neck, there was a sunburst medallion dangling from it. "She likes to play with it, and I want her to remember me. I will leave at sundown."

When we left him I wondered if we'd done the right thing. The weight of the necklace seemed heavier as we walked back to Lora's to pick up Emmy Rose. Later when we gave her the necklace she asked us about Huey. When we told her that he had to go back home far away she cried for quite a while. We've had time to talk about it and we still haven't decided if imprinting was at work or something else. One thing we're certain of is that we've not seen the last of Nahuel. We're also concerned because Emmy Rose keeps asking about him even though it's been weeks since he left. She wears a small fortune in 24 carat, hand hammered, antique gold around her neck even though it gets too heavy for her and she has to give it to me when she's playing. I need to find out what kind of danger venomous Nahuel could pose to my daughter. Fortunately I do still have time.

In the last five years I've not aged a bit. Neither has Kyle or any of the other shape shifters once they become mature. Our children seem to be growing up as normal humans would, and so far they haven't experienced any changes. They are aware that they are different from the other Inuit children but they have no trouble blending in and growing with them.

Because of this agelessness I'm beginning to think we're closer to the vampires than we ever believed. In the past our kind would eventually start families, then grow old and die. I'm sure there are those not mentioned in the legends who simply changed into some animal and headed off to live and die as another creature. But we're having families and still not aging. And the ability to change stays with us!

I've still got a lot of research to do, especially since I've found out that two of Kyle's brothers are living in a small fishing village in a remote part of Russia. They had kept in touch with Lora but she didn't know exactly where they were or what they were really doing until I did some checking. We were planning a trip for the spring to go and meet them since it seems odd to both of us that they have shunned civilization. I'm fairly certain that when we connect with them we will find that there are more of us.

It's hard for me to worry about more of us since I have such a full and active life already. Kyle has let me know that he wants a lot of children. He's already working on a bigger home for us a little further from the beach. I never would have thought that my life would turn out like it has. It's been five years since I found my true mate. With all the worries I had about him falling out of love with me, it seems almost impossible but we love each other _more_! Sometimes I get the feeling, that like the vampires we will have forever. I love the idea of having Kyle and our children forever.

**a/n: Well, here it is; the end. Or would it be the beginning? I've enjoyed this story so much and I hope all who read it enjoyed it too. I am planning another chapter following a different set of characters, so I'm not going to mark this as complete just yet. Please let me know what you thought of my writing, and know I've got another story posted in progress and one more I'm working out on the computer before I upload. Thank you so much for reading!!!**

**Well, I'm not going to get to that alternate chapter just yet so I'm going to mark this as complete and if I get around to it I'll refer back to this one. I've got another story that won't let me go and it's taking up more of my time.  
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